Chapter 4
San Francisco Confessional
Ding Dong.
Exactly at 7:00 a.m., Jake was at the door. Looking as amazing as ever in slacks, a button-down, and a blazer, he held a latte and a croissant as I opened the door.
“Good morning. Are you ready to leave?”
“Not quite. Come in.”
“Whoa, what happened here?” he asked, surveying the mess all around the house. “A slumber party?”
“There was an after party I didn’t attend, and these guys drank too much to drive home. They asked to spend the night here, but never made it into the bedroom.” I left out the part about me crying like a fool in my ex’s arms again. “I think they’re getting up now.”
Peter and James stretched their arms and slowly got up from the floor. “Good morning,” they muttered with one eye open.
“Hey. Did you sleep well? Are your backs OK? You both fell asleep on the floor the second you walked into the house. I have breakfast ready for you guys. You know I won’t be home all day, right?” I asked.
My pedantic rambling, followed by obedient nodding of heads, reminded me of my fourth graders at school. I laughed to myself.
“Jake, do you still have my spare keys? Can I have them back?” He slowly handed them to me. I winked at him, knowing he didn’t like giving these up.
For a sleepy guy, Peter’s senses were alert enough to catch my fumbled throw.
“Make yourselves at home. Just lock up when you go, and return the keys next time.”
Without any warning, Max walked out and I caught a startled glimpse on both Jake’s and Max’s faces. I looked over at Jake apologetically and hoped I hadn’t spoiled his mood for the rest of the day.
“Road trip!” My dear friend Peter yelled out, turning the attention on himself to save me. “We need to support our football team. Emily, are you in? Jake, you want to come too? I have ten tickets to the Las Vegas Bowl.”
“When is it?” I asked.
“The day after Christmas,” he replied.
“I guess so. You want to go?” I said turning toward Jake. “It would be fun.”
“You do know I went to your rival school?”
“Boo!” We all jeered, then laughed like good friends.
“I don’t know if I can sit through one of your football games.” Sure, rub it in that your school has a better football team. Wait till basketball season. “Plus, I can’t take any more time off from the hospital.”
I was bummed at the thought of Jake being really busy again, No doubt we’d be back to our once-a-week date night at best.
“Emily, what are you doing next Monday to Thursday? My mom called this morning to tell me that we are all going to Hawaii right before Christmas, and she wants me to bring you along. You know my family’s been dying to meet you. She’s reserved a seat for you on the plane, and you can room with my sister, Jane.”
“With your whole family?” I was a bit flustered at the thought of being with Jake’s family for four days. Would they like me? Would I like them? Then it dawned on me. “How did you get four days off?”
“Well…the chief of staff at the hospital is my dad’s brother. Mom reminded Uncle Henry that I haven’t had a vacation since I got there. It didn’t hurt that she promised him four tickets to the New Year’s Day football game.”
“I see. Are you sure you want me there for four days with your family?”
“I couldn’t think of a better Christmas present than to have you spend four days with me and my family!” Jake declared.
“OK, then. Tell your mother I said thank you and that I’d love to go.” The thought of being a part of Jake’s family on this trip gave me a sense of belonging and a sense of family I so desired.
We headed out the door, and I knew I had some explaining to do so before we reached the car; I pulled Jake’s hand to a halt.
“Jake, I’d like to explain about the guys you saw this morning, especially Max. I know that was really uncomfortable and I’m sorry.”
“Emily, you don’t have to explain anything.” Jake’s face looked even more uncomfortable, than when he saw Max come out of the guest room.
“I do. Peter and Jeff went out to the bar with our friends and drank enough to where they couldn’t drive home. We found them lying on my doorstep, and they asked to spend the night.”
“Can I ask where you and Max were at this time? I assume you weren’t with them?”
“No. We went out for a bite to eat. I didn’t have any dinner, and Max suggested I grab a bite to eat before we met up with the rest of the gang. Our dinner took longer than expected, and when we got back to my house, Peter and Jeff were comatose on my front porch.”
Jake’s face turned a bit pale. “Dinner?”
“It was literally dinner. We also had a good talk, which I’d like to share with you whenever you’d like to hear about it. Are you OK? Can we go on with this day without us being uncomfortable with one another?”
I gave him a hopeful smile.
“I told Max last night that I was really looking forward to spending a whole day with you. Even though we’ve been dating a few months, I don’t think we know each other very well.”
“What do you mean we don’t know each other?” he asked while opening the car door for me. “Here, get in. We need to get going, or we’re going to miss our flight.”
Flight. OK, we were probably headed up to San Francisco. I delighted in the idea of spending this day with him.
“How can you say that we don’t really know each other?” I guess he couldn’t get over my last statement.
“Jake, when was the last time…better yet, has there ever been a time where we spent an entire date without being interrupted? Our first date at the Mexican restaurant, what happened? You got paged and went in to perform some surgery. Our second date, brunch at the hotel, what happened? The chief called you and told you to attend some conference in Atlanta. That’s also when we got into our first argument and couldn’t even talk it through because you had to leave.”
I could tell by Jake’s surly expression, he didn’t like where I was taking this conversation. I personally enjoyed it. “Don’t get me going on our third date to Santa Barbara that ended before it even started. And last night, you left me stranded before dinner was served. Although I think we did manage to spend an entire three hours together. That’s a record, you know.”
“What about all the times I come by, call, or text you?”
“Are you kidding me? The last time you came by my house, you got mad at me and left in the middle of dinner.”
“I apologized about that,” he defended himself.
“You did, but only after you realized you were in trouble because I wouldn’t answer your calls or your texts. You can be such a five-year-old at times,” I teased him. “And as for your calls and texts, you call from the hospital and have to hang up within minutes. Your texts look like an hour-by-hour hospital itinerary. How did you ever have a relationship with this schedule? Does your hospital have no other doctors but yourself?”
I shook my head and chuckled. Time was a limited and precious commodity with Jake. We had never really spent any quality time together, and we shared very few meals in their entirety. Jake stayed quiet for a while and looked to be thinking over our exchange. He turned his head toward me as if to retort but stopped himself.
“So, you see why I’m so excited to spend this whole day with you?” I put my hand over his sitting on the armrest. He turned his palm up and interlocked our fingers.
“OK. I get your point. I already feel very close to you, but you apparently need more convincing. That will be my mission today. Ask me whatever you like. I’ll answer all your questions.”
As we drove up the 5 Freeway, I did my best to get some answers. “Burbank airport, huh? Could we be flying to San Francisco? It couldn’t be Seattle, that’s a bit too far for a day trip. Any hints?” He wouldn’t budge. “Aw, come on. I thought you said you would be answer
ing all my questions.”
“Not a chance,” he said with a sly grin. “You’ll have to wait till we get there.”
“OK, so here’s something about me you don’t know. I don’t like surprises. I like everything planned out, and I prefer to do the planning.”
“Control freak.”
Laughing, I answered, “I know, but I can’t help it.” Slowly I counted to five and then begged, “Please? Just a teeny tiny hint?”
Nothing worked till I started slowly working my lips from his neck up to his ear. “Are you sure you can’t give me a hint?” My poor attempt as a seductress worked…well.
“You’re not playing fair.” His body froze and the car started slowing down. “You need to stop before we get into an accident. I’ll tell you once we get to the airport. I promise.”
We parked the car in the long-term lot and got on the bus headed toward the terminal.
“So, where are we going? You promised to tell me,” I whined.
Jake grabbed me by the waist and pulled me in to him. “Where have all the kisses gone?” he asked while practicing the same moves I played on him in the car. Heading into terminal three bound for San Francisco, he didn’t have to answer after all.
As soon as we got on the plane, a nervous thought ran through my mind. “You don’t have to go in to work today, do you? They can’t make you come back from San Francisco, or worse yet, find you an operation to perform up in San Francisco?”
This time, Jake shook his head and laughed. “Does my job make you that nervous?”
“Yup. I think I’m going to reconsider dating a doctor—or at least I’m going to date a doctor who doesn’t ever have any emergencies.” I peeked over to see his expression. It didn’t change.
“Yeah? What kind of doctor would that be?”
“Maybe a dermatologist or perhaps a podiatrist.” I knew this would bother Jake, as a podiatrist was vying for my attention when Jake and I started dating.
“Trust me, after today, you’re not going anywhere from me.”
“Very confident there, Dr. Reid. We’ll see about that.”
At SFO, Jake rented a car and we headed north. In a little over an hour, breathtaking scenery filled with rows and rows of grapevines came into view. Our final destination—Napa Valley. Though the calendar read December, Mother Nature still boasted fall with trees full of leaves in gorgeous hues of oranges, reds, golden yellows, and greens. Quaint wineries resembled Hansel and Gretel cottages, and the CIA building looked like the Greystone Mansion. Every building looked inviting.
“Wine country reminds me of Tuscany, only flatter.” My thoughts rambled out loud.
“Have you been to Tuscany?”
“Yeah…it was the most beautiful place I’ve ever visited. I want to go back and hear Andrea Bocelli sing in some open meadow.” Feeling so at ease, I rattled off one of my dreams. I looked out the window and fantasized being in such a place with Jake—traveling together…possibly growing old together.
“A kiss for your thoughts?” Jake woke me up from my reverie.
I waited.
“Well?” An uneasy smile tugged at his lips.
“Where’s the promised kiss?”
He lifted our interlocking hands and brought them to his lips.
“I was admiring all the unique architecture.” Not confident enough to describe my fantasy, I stated a blasé fact.
“That’s it?”
“My answer was about as exciting as that kiss you just gave me.” I hid my smile by facing the scenery through the passenger window.
Before I knew what was happening, he grabbed me and gave me a full-blown kiss with his eyes on the road. The car swerved a bit. It took me awhile to regain the composure I’d lost after that embrace.
“Well? Shouldn’t that kiss elicit a better answer?”
I had to laugh. “I thought it would be nice to go back to Tuscany…” I would see what he’d try next in order to get the rest of my answer.
The next kiss I got off the side of the road was too indecent to put into words. My cheeks stayed blushed for a long while after the kiss was done.
“…with you when I’m old and gray…” Leaving everything hanging, I didn’t dare look him in the eye for a while.
The smug look on Jake’s face made me uncomfortable, so I changed the subject. “It’s so beautiful up here. Are we spending the whole day here?”
“Would you like to?” he asked with a smile.
“Sure. But I don’t really care where as long as we’re together.” This statement erased the insecure look Jake had been wearing since he saw Max appear from my guest bedroom. I took advantage of the stop light and leaned over to return the kiss he bestowed on me just a few minutes ago. “I’m really happy to be here with you,” I whispered. A myriad of honking car horns broke our embrace reprimanding us to keep driving.
Our lips unwillingly parted.
Jake eventually parked the car on the side of a beautiful two-story house. I knew exactly where we were.
We were at one of the world’s greatest, three Michelin-starred restaurants!
“How did you get us a table here on such short notice?”
“You know where we are?” he asked without a hint of surprise. “I had to pull favors from a few people last night. I didn’t know till we landed in SFO that we’d gotten a reservation,” he explained as we got seated right away.
My dream restaurant sat on a gracious piece of land. What looked to be a two-story brick house was comprised of offices on the second level and the restaurant on the bottom. There was a small courtyard and an organic garden, which most likely supplied all their greens. It was visually stunning. I assumed it would be no less than a sensory treat for the palate.
“How did you know this was my dream restaurant destination? I can’t believe we’re here! Thank you, Jake.”
“The foodie that you are, how could I not know?” Though he formed it as a question, he meant it as a statement.
This thoughtful man brought me to the one destination I’d been longing to visit. How could I not appreciate the heart behind the action?
Lunch began with an amuse bouche—the legendary salmon tartare cornets, a savory black sesame seeded cone filled with salmon tartare and red onion crème fraîche. Enjoying every bite of this teaser course, the inquisition began.
“Jake, tell me about your family. I can’t wait to meet them.”
“Well, as you know, I’m the oldest of three kids. My sister below me, Jane, is a senior in law school right now. Nick, the youngest is a senior in undergrad, and the real genius in our family. Most likely med school is in his near future but it’s a bit up in the air. He’s talented in so many ways, he’s torn about what to do with his life. He’s also the foodie in the family. You two will get along well.”
“Did you all go to the same school?” I asked while slurping my oyster with caviar.
“Jane actually went to undergrad up here. She’s the black sheep of the family,” he joked.
“Huh? I don’t understand.”
“My grandfather, my dad, his brothers, most of their wives, and we children all went to the same school. Gramps made a lot of money in real estate and was a generous man, as he donated much of it. My sister liked the convenience of his money, but not the notoriety it sometimes brought. So, she decided to come up here and then go live in New York. The rest of us were not as brave or as creative.”
“You’re quite the homogenous group.”
“Boring is a better definition.”
“You must have been a hot commodity at school. The girls must have thrown themselves at you to become a part of your family,” a hint of jealousy noted my voice.
“I suppose, but I never met anyone that made me want to settle down…” he trailed off. “After med school, residency was at Valley Hospital, and since then I’ve been at General Hospital, thanks to the chief selecting his nephew over hundreds of applicants.”
“Is the name Reid the reason why we got
a table here today as well?”
He seemed abashed as he confessed that one of his uncles was an investor in many restaurant ventures.
“I guess I’ve had it pretty easy all my life. But, my parents encouraged us to work hard.”
“Excellent! Good-looking, hard-working, and great earning potential,” I joked. “You’re definitely a keeper!”
“OK, now your turn. Tell me everything.”
Before giving my autobiography, I quickly savored the third course—cured hamachi belly.
“It’s not too exciting. It’s probably more tragic than anything else. I was born in Texas and spent most of my childhood there. My dad was a structural engineer, and he died when I was in eighth grade. He was at a job site for the city when a part of the building fell on him. He died instantly,” I explained.
“I’m so sorry! I didn’t realize that you were that young when your father passed away.”
“Well, the story gets worse, so hold that thought.” I sighed. “After my dad died, my mom and I came to LA to live with my grandparents. My mom had never worked before so she held odd jobs here and there, and we lived modestly. Mom missed Dad terribly, and she was never truly happy again after his death. This was hard on me because I felt the need to be happy around her, always. It was my job to lift her spirits up. During my senior year in high school, my mom died of a heart attack. That’s what the doctor’s told me, but I think she died more of a broken heart.”
Jake reached out and put his hands over mine when he saw the tears forming. He comforted me with a loving smile. “Oh, Emily…that must have been very painful.”
My heart warmed, knowing his thoughts were genuine. I composed myself and finished telling Jake that my grandparents passed away a few years ago from old age, and how I’ve been on my own pretty much since my senior year in high school.
“How did you pay for college and living expenses? How did you buy a house already?”
Our server filleted a whole-roasted turbot, along with an interesting burnt lemon for squeezing, and placed some on both our plates while I explained a bit more about myself. “I guess underneath this weak frame, I have a survival mentality. Tutoring young kids since my sophomore year in high school brought in decent money to pay for living expenses, and tuition was covered through grants and financial aid. I worked a lot in undergrad and saved all my money. There wasn’t much of a need to spend any of it. Plus, when my grandparents passed away, they left me their condo. I sold it and added that money to my already growing pot. One day it occurred to me I could put a down payment on a small house, so I decided to try, and next thing I knew, I was a homeowner. So that’s the story of my life till now.”
Though my life’s story was covered in three courses, there was more that Jake wanted to hear and understand.
“Can I ask you about your relationship with Max? Do you mind telling me?”
Jake’s serious face told me that he was wary of my answer, but he also seemed quite intent on knowing everything about me. Hoping for a deeper relationship, I didn’t want to keep anything from him. He gave me more peace in my heart than I had felt in a long time. I could tell that this was a man who would complement my life entirely, if I’d allow myself to love him. My heart wanted to give it a try.
“Tell me everything. Don’t worry about what I might think or feel. I also would like to know what happened with you and Max last night, if you don’t mind.”
I hesitated, wondering how much of myself to reveal. Would he want to know the whole truth about Max and me? My answer would hopefully add another dimension to our promising relationship.
“Max and I met our freshman year in college. It was absolute love at first sight for both of us.”
“Lucky guy!” Jake interrupted. “So what about him did you like so much?”
I instantly laughed at this question. “You guys are both so funny.”
“What do you mean?”
“Max asked me the same question last night. He asked what about you I liked so much.”
“So what did you tell him?”
“I think I’ll keep you guessing on that one.” I winked.
“Max and I met in the cafeteria of our freshmen dormitory and we immediately started hanging out. Because I felt so alone after my mom died, I happily accepted the chemistry between us. There was this crazy bond that formed, and we couldn’t stay away from one another. We didn’t declare our feelings for one another till after the first month, but it was obvious to everyone around us that we were a couple. We spent our entire college life inseparable. I thought we were going to get married. The only thing that was a hindrance was the fact that Max wasn’t the most motivated of students. He was super smart, but he didn’t know what he wanted to do with his life and this bothered both of us. Although we had no idea how he would support a family, if it came to that, we were so in love, we didn’t care.”
With my every sentence, Jake’s expression turned from curious to somber. He was hurt by my fervent accounts of our college years.
“I’m sorry, Jake. You didn’t need to hear all of that. I got a bit carried away.” I apologized repeatedly.
“No, it’s all right. I asked for it,” he stated with a bit of masochistic chivalry. “Continue…”
At this point, I wavered between taking a bite of steak from Japan or continuing my saga with Max. Seeing Jake’s anxious face, the beef needed to wait.
“Well, there’s not much more to say. On graduation day, Max appeared nervous all day and tried to avoid me, so I thought he was going to ask me to marry him. Instead, after the ceremony, he broke up with me, giving some excuse about not being ready for a serious commitment. Just like that, he let go of four years and the bond that I thought could never be broken…broke.”
Jake could see the pain on my face. I didn’t know how to explain to him that this feeling left in my heart was not love, but hurt. I wanted Jake to believe it was over between Max and me, and that I had finally let go of the past—if not entirely, almost entirely.
Jake tried to break up my glum mood and asked me again about Max’s question from last night.
“Well, I told Max how comfortable I feel with you. I feel protected and secure, and I can be myself with you. Although I’ve only known you for a short while, it’s like you’ve been with me my whole life. I don’t know. It’s a bit strange but you’re the only person, aside from my parents, who makes me feel entirely comfortable. I can’t quite explain this. Max got very angry with me last night when I told him this.”
“You mean you’ve never felt entirely comfortable with Max?”
“With Max, I was always trying to please him. My whole world revolved around him. I think I was infatuated with him. Max appeared at a time in my life when I had nobody but my grandparents. My parents were gone and I didn’t have any siblings. Max not only became my boyfriend, but he also became my only family. I think I smothered him. Maybe I was a borderline stalker. That’s probably why he eventually broke up with me.”
We both got a good laugh.
“You want to know the hardest part about this breakup?”
Jake appeared wary again.
“I guess I’m going to tell you regardless. All the loves in my life left me without any warning—my dad, my mom, and Max. I don’t think I ever loved anyone as much as I loved these three people, and I felt abandoned by all of them.” The tears hovered again. “I had a tough year and a half letting go. I had lost four years of my life.”
“Are you sure you’re over Max?” Jake lamented, “Do I want to know?”
“Last night, Max apologized for hurting me. He reassured me that he loved me as much as I loved him while we were dating, and that I wasn’t the only one hurting after the breakup. His apology came off a bit contrived since he started dating Jennifer within a month of our breakup. I accepted his apology and decided that this finally closed the Max and Emily chapter. So to answer your question, yes I am over him, but four years is hard to erase.”
&nbs
p; Initially, Jake looked wholly tentative. He still didn’t quite believe I was over Max. After last night, he had credible reason not trust me. Still, I hoped he would want to give me and us a chance. With Max, as much as I’d hoped, I never truly believed that we would be together till the very end. But with Jake, there was an inexplicable sense of completeness, an unbreakable connection, like he was meant to be in my life—like he would always be a part of my life.
Attempting to take the spotlight off myself, I asked Jake about some of the girls he’d dated. This would also give me a chance to eat my dessert—a hot, creamy chocolate cake sitting atop a pool of bittersweet dark chocolate sauce, and below a house made cinnamon ice cream. What decadence!
“It seems hardly fair that I’ve given you details of my one love yet I haven’t heard any details of the loves in your life. I’m sure there have been many women in your life. Tell me everything.”
“I had a few girlfriends, but I haven’t dated much since I got to General Hospital.”
“Oh, that doesn’t surprise me. With your insane schedule, how could you have a life? I’m surprised we’ve come this far.”
“Kelley and I dated on and off for years. Our families knew each other since we were little, because both our dads were doctors at the same hospital. It seemed a bit incestuous since our families were such close friends. I think our parents thought we’d get married.”
“So what happened?”
“I went off to med school, she went off to business school, and it was too difficult to have a long-distance relationship. We tried several times to get back together but failed.”
“I assume she went to school with you? Did you date her all throughout undergrad?”
“Actually, she didn’t, and even during undergrad she and I dated on and off.”
“What made your relationship so tentative?”
“I liked her very much and I suppose I loved her at one point but I never thought that she was the one.”
“What does she look like?” I immediately regretted asking this, as it seemed like a petty question, but curiosity got the better of me.
“She’s not nearly as beautiful as you are,” Jake said with the most adoring look. I blushed and changed the subject.
After two amuse bouches, nine courses of gastronomic extravagance, and free-flowing wine, we were done with our meal. Time had sped by. With each course, I fell deeper and deeper for a man whose candor and sincerity proved a reciprocity of feelings. In a matter of three hours there was no doubt we would be in a solid relationship.
To my utter delight, the chef and owner graciously visited our table and talked with us about our meal and his restaurant. Asking what my favorite dish was during lunch, I happily answered, “Moulard duck foie gras, the kuroge sirloin and risotto with white truffles…mmm. Anything with white truffles!”
Both men laughed as Jake was warned, “She’s got expensive taste.”
“Don’t I know it!” he answered with a wink.
We got an inspiring tour of the restaurant. It’s all about finesse emblazoned the walls of his spotless kitchen with copper pots hanging from the ceiling. All the chefs and sous chefs worked busily to prepare each course with seamless effort and efficiency. The attention to detail marked this restaurant as the top dining place in the world. Every dish that went out looked spotless. My eyes darted from the salad station to the meat station to the pastry station. I wanted to jump in and work with them but Jake pulled me in his arms and led me out of the kitchen so they could continue working. We thanked the staff for an incredible meal, and Jake mentioned visiting his New York restaurant next time he was there. Secretly, I hoped I would be there as well.
We headed down Highway 29 toward the city for the second half of our day. It was probably 2:00p.m. or so, and I felt this lazy urge to take a nap. Jake pulled into a high rise and parked the car. I wondered where we were, but got no explanation. Staring at him gave no clues, but there was only that knowing and annoying grin. Jake opened the door to a beautiful apartment overlooking the San Francisco Bay, juxtaposed between the Ferry building and AT&T Park. It was furnished in a comfortable shabby chic style. I looked at him again for an explanation.
“This apartment belongs to our family. My parents used to come up to the Bay Area all the time when Jane was at school and hoped that Nick would come to school up here as well. I thought we would rest a little before our dinner and show.”
“Dinner? Show? How can you eat again after nine courses?” I asked. “There’s no way I can eat again today. I am so full. Besides, I have nothing to wear to attend any shows up here. What are we going to watch?”
“You’ll see,” he answered with a funny grin. “Don’t worry. I’ve taken care of everything. Let’s hang out for a couple of hours. I, too, am stuffed.”
Jake grabbed my hands and led me to a large white sofa situated right in front of an even larger plasma TV. He sat down and pulled me right next to him. Every inch of our bodies touched, but that didn’t seem to be enough for him. Jake curved his arms around my waist and pulled me even closer to him. Somewhere between the nine courses of food and wine, the comfort of the sofa, and the heat of our bodies, I fell asleep.
What seemed like minutes later, I woke up lying on top of Jake’s body. Jake had comfortably sprawled out on the sofa with his head on the armrest and his legs stretched out. My body, wedged between the back of the sofa and Jake’s warm body, also stretched out comfortably.
“Oh my gosh. How long have I been asleep?”
“A couple of hours, I think,” Jake answered with his left hand stroking my long hair and his right working the remote.
“I’m so sorry, Jake. I can’t believe I fell asleep on you. I don’t think I’ve ever fallen asleep on a date before.”
“It was nice. I rather liked it. You appeared quite cozy.” He smiled and kissed the top of my head.
“Um…I didn’t drool on you, did I?” I asked while wiping his shirt just in case.
“Do you normally?” He was now chuckling.
“I don’t think so, but of course the one time I fall asleep with a man, I would make a fool of myself.”
Jake pondered over this statement while I pushed myself up.
“Stay,” he whispered. He pulled me up, eye to eye, and before I knew it, our lips joined uncontrollably. Both arms tightened around my body, and his lips made several longing trips down my neck and then back to my lips. His kisses felt like a staccato piano piece. They were short, detached, and all over. He never stayed in one place too long. This made me want him even more.
To our chagrin, a knock on the door stopped our long-overdue embrace. Jake grumbled as he got up to answer it. I also got up and fixed myself for whatever company we were expecting. It was a doorman with a rolling rack full of clothes, shoes, and accessories.
“What’s all this?” I questioned.
“Remember I told you I would take care of everything for the show?”
And taken care of everything he had. In the apartment sat half a dozen dresses and pairs of shoes for me to try on. There were even the proper undergarments to match the dresses.
“How did this all get here?”
“Actually, Jane is in San Francisco right now and she helped me. I thought about asking the concierge, but she offered to go out and get all this for you. I hope you don’t mind. Jane is the only girl in the family and she’s always wanted a sister. She’s more than excited to meet you and become your friend. Is that OK?” he asked with more hesitation than necessary.
“Jane, your sister? Oh, I can’t wait to meet her!” Being an only child, I craved company constantly. My heart jumped for joy at the thought of having a new friend.
“Jane is quite an opera buff, and I remembered you talking about Carmen. So, Jane helped out again and got us a box at the opera house, and that’s the final half of our date. We are meeting her for dinner so you have to eat.”
“Jake, this has been one of the most amazing dates. Lunch was a ga
stronomic feast. Meeting the chef owner was almost as phenomenal as lunch, and I’m really touched you figured out how much I like opera. I guess you do listen during our dates even though they’re always cut short. You are an amazing man.”
Jake had this exceptional ability to read between the lines. He picked up my nuances and facial expressions and could easily decode answers I didn’t realize I was giving. After half a date at a Mexican restaurant, was my food obsession that obvious? He correctly guessed that his brother Nick and I would be great foodie friends. It was also a wonder as to how he knew about my fascination with Carmen. Maybe it was the way I listened to Carmen in his car, or maybe it was from the brief conversation we had about the video I watched in high school. None of this information came directly from me.
In one single date, Jake had crossed off many items high on my “to-do” list. After Julia Roberts in Pretty Woman, there wasn’t a single girl out there who wouldn’t want to be whisked off to San Francisco on a date. Today had been a combination of the surreal and the comical as I too, would be watching an opera, my favorite opera in San Francisco. However, I had one up on Vivian Ward. I had dined at the best restaurant in the world.
Quickly, I picked out a dress and a pair of shoes and went in to one of the rooms to get ready. In the living room, Jake was already waiting for me with one more surprise in his hand.
He held out a little box—the kind a girl received when a man got down on one knee, about to propose to the woman he loved.
“I want ask you something. Please don’t be scared by the box. It’s not as serious as it looks.”
That allowed me to breathe a sigh of relief. Jake grinned at the seriousness of my face. He carefully watched me open the tiny box and intently studied my expression as I wondered what exactly I was looking at.
“Um…it’s stunning, but could you explain this ring to me?”
In my hand lay a white gold or platinum band with hundreds of pave diamonds set into the shallow depths of the band. There was no end to the shiny diamonds that encircled the ring. This was without a doubt the kind of ring women generally wore on their fourth finger as a wedding band if they were lucky enough to afford one of this magnitude.
“OK,” he breathed aloud, “it’s not an engagement ring, nor is it a wedding band, as you might fear. I wanted to give you a ring that symbolized our commitment to one another…no scratch that. That didn’t come out right.” His hands shook as they reached for mine.
“Emily, we’ve dated a couple of months now, and I know you’re not quite sure where we stand in the formal sense. I actually bought this ring for you after our first date. Even back then, I knew I wanted to be with you. I mean, date only you. I wanted to ask you…geez, I feel like a school boy asking a girl to be his girlfriend,” he interjected in the middle of his own explanation, “um…I would like for us to date…exclusively date. What I mean is…will you be my girlfriend?” he finally spit out.
I started with a half smile that led to a giggle. He was unusually insecure for Jake’s standards. When I didn’t answer immediately, his lips turned into a pouty frown.
“Are you going to answer? You’re making me nervous.”
“OK, so let me get this straight. You spent thousands of dollars to ask my permission to do what we are already doing now? Dating?”
“Um, yeah. Aren’t you the one that called our relationship ‘whatever it is that we have’?”
I cringed when he said that. Those were definitely not choice words.
“Jake. Aren’t we already exclusively dating? Have you been seeing other girls as well? Is that why it’s so hard to spend any time with you?” My lips curled into a teasing smile. Jake didn’t find me funny. Trying to give him more assurance I said, “I haven’t had a desire or need to see anyone else. I feel blessed to be with you.”
“I’m still unsure how you feel about me. I know I haven’t said much today, but you must know how much I adore you. You’re trusting, yet guarded; you’re independent, yet willing to follow; and your heart’s been broken, yet you’re willing to give love another try. I love all these qualities about you. It doesn’t hurt that you’re fun, funny, and beautiful as well. I wasn’t sure you felt the same way. Especially after seeing you with Max last night, I was afraid you might be reconsidering our relationship,” he confessed with some satisfaction, but still much apprehension.
“Jake. I really like you, and I want our relationship to grow. You’re right. After Max, I needed to guard my heart more than necessary. But I trust you and feel most secure when we’re together. You are the only man I want to be with.”
Even with my profession, Jake’s expression hardly changed so I felt compelled to continue. “I’m sorry you had to witness my first encounter with Max and his new girlfriend. Being such an awkward moment, I didn’t react the way I would have liked. It did affect me. I guess it hurt me more than I thought it would, even with you by my side. But, you and our relationship add so much joy to my life. I wasn’t lying when I said that you’re the only person who makes me feel entirely comfortable. I’m elated when we’re together and lonely when we’re apart. Will this answer do? I will wear this very expensive ring as a symbol of my commitment to our relationship. I would be honored to be your girlfriend.”
Lovingly, he pulled me to him and held me. He wanted a relationship with me despite all my inadequacies. We were content being with one another. I wasn’t wrong to anticipate that this trip would bring us closer. Love, hope, and joy—a generic mantra for most—took on a completely new meaning in my heart. My heart felt whole again, emancipated from Max’s chains. It was finally free to beat for someone else.
With good foresight, Jake bought a necklace to go with the ring. Knowing that I wouldn’t want to wear it on my finger, he hung it as a pendant on my neck. It was beautiful—heavy, but beautiful.
Jane was already at the restaurant waiting at the bar for us. Her build was slender and she stood at about five feet seven. Her hair wasn’t as dark as Jake’s, but her eyes were just as blue. She and Jake shared many of the same facial features. Upon first impression, she was just as beautiful as Jake was handsome. I could imagine how stunning the five of them would look in a family portrait.
“Emily, this is my only sister, Jane.”
“Jane, this is my Emily.”
“I’m so happy to meet you, Jane. Thank you very much for all your troubles. It was unnecessary but much appreciated,” I said, giving her a hug. She hugged me right back like we were old friends.
“Thrilled to do it for you. I don’t think I’ve ever seen my brother this happy. You are actually the first girlfriend he’s introduced me to since Kelley, right Jake?”
“I guess. I don’t know.”
I turned to Jake to tease him. “There were probably so many girls before me, he didn’t have the energy to introduce them all to you.” Jane and I laughed. Jake pouted.
Our restaurant was located in the business district close to the Embarcadero. The nicely decorated restaurant offered another pre-fixe menu. After lunch, I chose the vegetarian option but couldn’t resist the sweetbread appetizer, while Jane and Jake chose a four-course meal, starting with the sweetbread as well. Sipping fizzy water, Jane and I spoke endlessly about our likes and dislikes. We talked as though we were close friends catching up on old times. Jake didn’t mind that I paid no attention to him. Content just to hold my hand, he watched us converse.
“What’s it like living in New York?” I asked Jane. “I’ve always wanted to live there. Although, I think I could live up here as well.”
“Weren’t you just there over Thanksgiving?”
“Yeah, I had so much fun. It could have only been better if your brother had gone with me.” I squeezed Jake’s hand.
“New York is the most exciting city. My girlfriends and I meet at all hours of the day, and there are so many restaurants and cafés bustling with people. I enjoy how busy the streets are, and how people bump into you on the subway. It feels like you
’re living among everyone. In LA, you drive everywhere, so you don’t really get to know your neighbors. In New York, your neighbors become your commuting buddies. You should come visit me. We’d have a great time.”
“I’d love that.” Next time, I’ll make sure Jake and I go together. “Jane, how old are you? Are we the same age? If you’re in your last year of law school, does that make you older? There’s a bit of a gap between you and Jake.”
“No, I’m also twenty-four. My mom says Jake is spoiled rotten because I came along so late. He was an only child for too long.”
“Who says I’m spoiled?” Jake dropped my hand and looked aghast. “Mom says you were always the competitive one trying to outdo me.”
“Oh, only everyone! Plus, I didn’t try. I outdid you in every category,” she retorted.
“Because he was the first grandchild in the Reid family, everyone spoiled him. He loved the attention. To this day, he’s still the golden child of this family.” There was humor and slight resentment in her tone. It made me laugh.
“So, Emily,” she said, turning to me, “what about my brother do you like? Why would you want to date someone who can spend no more than a couple of hours with you at a time? I’m shocked he took an entire weekend off. You must be special. I didn’t think he’d ever meet anyone who could tolerate his schedule.”
“I have to agree that he is quite the workaholic. We’ve had only four dates in the last six weeks, and every single date was cut short due to work.”
“Hey, no more Jake-bashing.” Jake frowned again as he pushed his seat closer to me. “Tell Jane what you like about me,” he directed with a childlike eagerness.
“I told you he’s an attention monger.” Jane rolled her eyes.
Not having grown up with siblings, I enjoyed their banter. It was fun watching Jake and Jane argue and poke fun at one another. I’d never experienced this with anyone. Since Max had only brothers, this brother-sister relationship was an entirely new discovery.
“Tell her, Emi.”
“Let’s see. It’s not a very long list,” I answered, laughing with Jane. “I’m kidding.” I quickly added before Jake disowned me as a girlfriend. “Jake has this amazing way of making me feel like I’m the only person in this world who matters to him. I feel incredibly special.” My eyes glowed as I spoke about my boyfriend. “Not only is he attentive, he’s a caring, very loving person. Is that a good enough answer?”
His silly grin shouted to everyone in the restaurant that he liked my answer very much. Passing the test, he leaned over and kissed me—a bit too passionately—in front of his sister. Jane had other ideas.
“Are you talking about my brother? Do you know what Kelley’s biggest complaint about him was? She always bemoaned the fact that he didn’t pay enough attention to her.”
“Now why must you bring Kelley into this story? That’s the past. Let’s leave it there,” Jake warned his sister.
“My mom says that Jake needs a woman with a strong sense of self-esteem, because he never pays much attention to anyone but himself. Have you two gotten into an argument yet? Has he been mad at you?”
I shook my head yes. “I don’t know if I’d call them arguments, but we got into a couple of disagreements.”
“Wait till you get into an all-out argument with him. I don’t know if you’re going to think he’s so attentive and caring, then. You should see the tantrum he throws.”
“I love these new revelations about you. You didn’t tell me any of this during lunch.” My eyes looked at him in delight. “I can’t wait to see you throw a tantrum. Maybe I’ll purposely make you angry just to see your reaction.”
Jane loved my goading. Jake didn’t fall into our trap.
“Don’t believe a word she says. I don’t know what’s gotten into my sister.” He turned to his sister and tried to give her a stern look. She wasn’t scared.
“So, Jake, what do you like about Emily? Try to keep it to a few sentences, OK? We have an opera to watch.”
Just then, servers came with our third course. A sautéed striped bass sat in front of them, while I got a medley of mushrooms.
“If I had to sum up what I love most about Emily, it would be her honesty. Even though she knows it’s not to her benefit, she’ll still tell you what’s in her heart. I know way too much about her last relationship.” He lightly shook his head.
“Was my honesty at lunch not to my benefit? Am I in trouble?” My forehead creased with a worried look.
Jake’s lips reached over to mine again and eased my concern. “I appreciate your honesty, whether or not I appreciate your answers.”
Jane broke our tender moment and continued her question-and-answer session, and Jake happily obliged by giving her a detailed account of our first encounter.
“We met late at night at a supermarket and I had to take her to the hospital after she fell, reaching for a box of cereal. So, I take her to General Hospital, and we’re sitting in the examination room, and do you know what she asks me? She had the gall to ask if I was really a doctor at GH and not just some staff member.”
In response to Jane’s “why” look, I said, “Well, for someone who worked at the hospital, he got no special treatment. I waited there just as long as everyone else to get out of ER. In fact, there were patients who came after me but left earlier. I thought he was lying to me about being a doctor. It took us three hours.”
Jane broke into a chortle. “Yeah, he has no power there. You should have called Uncle Henry instead. You would have been in and out with a call from him. By the way, why are you guys going back down tonight? Jake, didn’t you ask Emily if she wanted to stay the weekend?” I could tell Jake was happy to hear his sister ask this question. Put on the spot, I didn’t know how to answer. “Emily, you should stay with us in the apartment and go down tomorrow night. We could spend another day together. Are you uncomfortable with me being in the apartment? Do you want to be alone with Jake?”
This conversation turned even more awkward.
“Oh, no, Jane…I don’t feel uncomfortable with you. Jake didn’t fully explain what was happening today.”
“Then you’ll stay the night? We can get to know each other better.”
What could I say? “I’d love that, Jane, but I’m not prepared to spend the night here. I don’t have any clothes or toiletries.”
“You can borrow all of mine. We can also quickly stop by any of the stores in Union Square if you need to pick up something.”
“OK.” I was really nervous about spending the night with Jake, even with Jane in tow. I hadn’t explained to him about my wishes to stay chaste till marriage. Most likely, he would expect or at least desire to spend the night with me. When and how I would have this conversation stayed with me the rest of dinner as Jane and Jake picked up their unfinished thought.
“So, Jake, anything else you want to tell me about Emily?”
“Let me excuse myself to the ladies’ room and you two can talk about me all you like. It’s a bit embarrassing hearing about myself.”
I walked to the ladies’ room, leaving the Reid siblings to talk. Jake and Jane had given me a true taste of family, something that disappeared too early in my life. It was altogether sweet, sour, salty, and a bit bitter at times, but most of all, it had the wonderful flavor of love. This is what I’d missed out on being an only child with parents up in heaven. I was glad to have witnessed a small part of their family.
On my way back, seeing that the Reid siblings hadn’t finished their conversation, my pace slowed, allowing Jake to finish. What I’d overheard added another cup to my already overflowing feelings for him.
“And…I love her strength. I’ve never met any girl who is such a survivor. She’s pretty much been alone since high school, put herself through college, and then bought and created a home all by herself. She’s worked for everything she has. Nothing has been handed to her. Yet she smiles and enjoys life. Her attitude is amazing. But, as strong as she appears, she’s terribly
tenderhearted. I think this is what makes me so enamored with her. She hurts easily, cries readily, but loves deeply. She makes me want to care for her and shelter her from anything that may harm her. I’ve never felt such a strong desire to protect someone as I do for Emily.”
As I walked back to my seat, happiness swelled in my heart till it felt like a balloon about to burst. Jake had summed up Emily Logan better than I could have. As happy as I was, there was this nagging insecurity. Could such a perfect man exist in my world? I feared answering this question.
We got back to the apartment around midnight and Jane excused herself to answer a phone call. Here it was, the conversation I dreaded.
“So…” Jake started very casually, “where will you be sleeping tonight?”
I cringed at the thought of having to explain myself to him. I waited for him to finish before going into my tedious explanation.
“Door number one is my room, door number two is Jane’s room, or you can sleep alone behind door number three.” He pointed to each room with a hopeful and expectant look.
There was an awkward silence.
“Jake…I need to tell you something.” I dragged his name a bit but quickly let out the next group of words.
“Uh-oh, did I say something wrong?”
“No, I guess it’s time to confess since we’re at this juncture. Maybe I should have told you before accepting your ring. You might have had second thoughts about wanting me as your girlfriend.”
Jake looked mildly horrified. “You’re making me nervous; what’s wrong?”
This conversation wasn’t nearly as difficult to have the first time with Max at age eighteen but now, I sounded so archaic telling my thirty-year-old boyfriend that I wanted to stay a virgin.
“Nothing is wrong. I should have told you this earlier. I want you to know that I’ve never, um…” There was no reason to be, but I was embarrassed.
“Well…I’ve never slept with a man before. You are literally the first man I fell asleep with earlier today, though nothing happened. I’m not planning on being with you or any man till I get married.” Incredibly nervous, I found my hands tightly clutching my borrowed robe unable to look at Jake till I finished confessing.
Relief, confusion, happiness, and chagrin all flashed across Jake’s face and in that order. “You mean you and Max have never…?”
“No, we’ve never been together in that sense.”
“But how? You dated for four years.”
“It was hard but I really wanted to save myself for whomever I might end up marrying. My mom was old fashioned, and she wanted me to wait till I got married. This was a promise I made to her before she died, and I’d like to honor her wishes. Also, watching my parents love each other, I thought it would be most special with the man I’d spend the rest of my life with.”
“What if that man isn’t as pure as you are?” He looked worried again.
I chuckled, realizing he obviously didn’t believe what I believed. “That’s all right. It would be most perfect if we were each other’s first, but I can’t expect everyone to have the same beliefs. Are you OK with my confession? I’m sorry I didn’t bring it up earlier. I didn’t quite know how to approach this subject. Are you upset?” My head fell back down worried what Jake might think.
“Disappointed, yes; upset, no. I guess this happily speeds up our timetable.” Oddly, amusement mirrored his disappointment.
“What does that mean?”
“Oh, that’s for me to know and for you to soon find out.”
I could hear a quiet sigh as he held me in his arms till Jane walked back into the living room. He gently kissed my lips and I followed Jane to her room.
“Emily,” Jane carefully called my name. “You don’t have to sleep in my room on my account. You can be with Jake if you like.”
“Jane, I want to be here with you if you’re OK with it.”
“I’d love it but is Jake OK with this?”
“I didn’t give him a choice.” I giggled. After all was said and done, Jake accepted my revelation without much of a fight. Maybe the physical part of our relationship wouldn’t be too much of a struggle—or maybe this was wishful thinking.
“Where shall I sleep?” Jane’s room had two twin bunks, reminding me of the summer camp I’d visited back in sixth grade.
“I sleep here on this bottom bunk. Why don’t you take the other bottom bunk?”
“Why are there so many beds in here?”
Jane’s pretty face broke into a laugh. “There was a time in undergrad when we had so much rain, our sorority house got flooded. My room, endearingly called, ‘the jungle,’ had twelve girls and twelve beds. When we were all displaced, we brought as many beds into this apartment as possible, and we all lived here for a month until the house got fixed. The other two rooms got rid of the bunk beds, but I kept my room the same. I guess you could call it nostalgia. I feel like I’m back in college whenever I sleep in here.”
“How fun! Maybe I should have rushed as a freshman. It would have been the perfect solution to not having any siblings.”
“So…” Jane had a devilish look about her.
“Yes..?” Fearful—I was definitely fearful of what was coming next.
“Are we good enough friends for me to ask why you are sleeping here rather than with my brother? I promise, he has a very large bed in his room. You’ll be more comfortable there than in here.”
“Oh…that. Though she didn’t know what she was doing to me at the time, my mom made me promise her—right before she died—that I would stay a virgin maid till I got married. I think she just said that hoping to push off the inevitable for as long as possible, but since that was one of my last promises to her, I feel like I have to keep it.”
“Oh. My. Gosh! Seriously? This is so hilarious that Jake has to wait till you guys get married to sleep with you. I bet you he’s out there running miles on the treadmill to work off his suppressed expectations or he’s scheming to see how he can work around your vow.”
“He seemed to take it OK when I told him tonight.”
The laughter that ensued could be heard all the way to AT&T Park. Perhaps I was a bit hasty in thinking that Jake would be OK with my chastity agreement.
“Oh, this is his comeuppance!” Jane brushed away the natural tears that came from her guffaw. “He always thought he could get whatever girl he wanted and unfortunately, that was the case. I don’t know of too many women who have refused my brother anything…till now. He’s finally found the girl and she won’t play to his tune. Oh, I love it!”
Jane’s rambling roused out of me a new set of insecurities. “Has he been with a lot of women? Kelley was the only girl I heard about but…I guess it’s silly of me to think that with his looks and at his age that there weren’t many more…”
Jealousy, along with sadness, speared through my heart knowing that there had been copious girls who had been a part of Jake’s life. Jane quickly defended her brother and tried to turn me around.
“No, no! Don’t get the wrong idea, Emily. Yes, there have been other women, but I promise you this—there has never been a girl like you.”
I must not have look convinced.
“Life has always been easy for my brother. He’s smart, good looking, charming, and fairly wealthy. He’s never had to work very hard for anything—especially women. But, seeing him with you this weekend, and without you Thanksgiving weekend, made me do a double take. Regardless of what he’s told you, from what my mom and I can tell, he is madly in love with you. We’ve never seen him so anxious about pleasing a girl.”
Her comment brought forth a weak smile.
“I see you’re wearing the ring. Did you know he bought it after just one date with you?”
I nodded yes. “He told me today.”
“Did you also know that he was miserable the whole week you and Sarah were gone to New York? He looked like a lost puppy. Every member of the Reid family teased him mercilessly during Thanksgiving dinner. Un
cle Henry says he’s ‘whipped’!”
“Jane, you don’t have to say anymore. I understand what you’re trying to do. It’s not so much Jake that worries me. It’s more me. He’s so perfect. This whole weekend is like a scene out of a movie—it can’t be real in my life. My life hasn’t been easy since middle school and I don’t want to start believing it’s changed for this much the better.”
Before she could rebut my statement, I gave Jane the long version of my life and told her about all my insecurities. Deep into the night we spoke about my fears. Jane listened like a sibling and encouraged and admonished all in appropriate ways. Similar to the comfort I found in Jake, his sister was no different. I could picture us being fast friends and sisters.
We talked into the wee hours of the morning, but I still found myself awake before the sun was up. The light outside encouraged me to get up, brush my teeth, put on Jane’s borrowed clothes, and step into the living room. Surprisingly Jake was up already, reading the paper.
“Good morning,” I whispered.
“Good morning, Beautiful. Why are you up so early?”
“I can’t ever sleep well outside of my own bed. Are you going somewhere? Why are you dressed like Lance Armstrong?”
“I thought I’d go cycling this morning to release some of this pent-up energy.”
Good thing he kept his head in the newspaper. My lips tightly held together to keep from laughing. Jake apparently hadn’t taken the news as well as I thought he had.
“You want to ride with me?” As much as I didn’t want to, I thought it would be better for the relationship if I went with him.
“I don’t have any clothes. Plus, where are we getting bikes at this hour?”
“All the bikes are downstairs in storage and Jane has plenty of clothes for you to borrow. She used to cycle in undergrad.” He walked into Jane’s room and blinded her by turning on the light. “Jane, where do you keep your cycling clothes?”
Extremely annoyed, she yelled at her brother. “What is your problem? It’s still dark out. Why do you need my cycling clothes?”
“Emi and I are going out for a ride.”
“Jake…we got to bed a few hours ago. Leave Emily alone. She and I are both tired.”
“Just answer my question.”
Jake kept the light on till he found what he was looking for and handed me clothes and shoes to change into. Not having done this since grammar school, I worried about the challenge of riding a bike in this hilly city. Plus, the professional gear looked ridiculous on me.
“Where are we going?”
“Let’s go get breakfast. There’s nothing to eat here,” he answered, handing me Jane’s bike and helmet. “You do know how to ride a bike?”
“Yes, but I’m no professional. It’s been awhile since I’ve been on one of these.” Hesitation marred my face.
“You’ll be fine. What do you want to eat?”
“How about a greasy donut or an almond croissant and a latte? Even after two huge meals yesterday, I’m starving.”
“I know just the place. Let’s go.” He led me out of the Embarcadero and headed south.
“Wait! You’re not thinking of riding all the way into the Mission District, are you?” I asked warily.
“Yup. You know this town better than I thought.”
“Yeah, I’ve been around the block a few times in this city.”
“Apparently you don’t go all the way around the block in any city,” he answered sarcastically and rode away.
I cracked up laughing. “Wait for me…”
The ride to breakfast wasn’t as bad as I thought it might be. The donut shop smelled heavenly. With so many choices, I asked Jake to buy one of every donut and took a bite of every flavor. I couldn’t get enough of the banana de leche and lemon pistachio. Jake favored the maple-glazed bacon apple. I wasn’t crazy about the sweet and savory combo of his choice. We took the leftovers for Jane and went to our next destination.
My favorite bakery in the Mission District was located many, many blocks from the donut shop. Once here, there were too many choices, so little room in the stomach—as this was always my dilemma.
“Do I need to buy one of everything here too?” he asked in a sour tone. He was still sore about last night.
“Jake…are you going to be upset with me every time we’re in an overnight situation?”
“If I say yes, will you do something about it?”
“Yup, I will.”
“You will?” Jake’s eyes twinkled again. I so didn’t want to crush this glow.
“I’m going to have to make sure we are not in this situation ever again. You’ll have to apologize to your parents for me and tell them I can’t go to Hawaii with you.”
If Jake was sore earlier, he was completely pouting now. “Emily!” He dragged my name in frustration.
I put both my hands on his cheeks and kissed his puckered lips. “Will you be OK with Hawaii or should I stay home?” Jake knew he’d lost this round.
He tried to shake my hands loose but instead, I grabbed him and kissed him longingly in front of a long line of strangers. This did the trick. His dimpled smile reappeared. “Jane was wrong about you,” I told him. “I find you adorable when you’re mad.” I kissed him one more time.
A second breakfast of almond croissants, bread pudding, an utterly tantalizing open-faced sandwich with béchamel, gruyere, ham, and grilled asparagus, and a last bite of coconut crème tart gave both of us the surge of energy needed for the excruciating ride back home. Jake mapped out a long route from the bakery to Dolores Park, up to the War Memorial Opera House, then back to the apartment. I guess I should have been thankful that he didn’t choose to take me up and down Lombard “Crooked” Street. While my boyfriend rode with vigor, my sloshy stomach struggled the last mile home. A few times, the contents of my stomach slithered its way up, but in the end, they decided to stay put. Finally back at home, we put our bikes away and walked across the street to the Ferry building. To my chagrin, the farmers’ market didn’t open on Sundays, so I followed Jake into the myriad of shops instead.
Jake started at a cook shop and purchased an all-inclusive picnic basket.
“Where are we going with this basket?” What fun we would have today!
“Maybe you are not a part of the we. Didn’t you prefer Jane’s company last night? I’m taking someone else on a picnic today.” He smirked as I pouted. This had gone far enough. I turned the table on him and followed him around the marketplace but stopped talking.
He walked into a French-looking pastry shop, and bought two of every flavor of their Parisian macarons. How did he know macarons were my favorite dessert? We walked into the cheese shop for cheese, wine, and crackers; the salumeria for all things salty and pig; an oyster shop for clam chowder, mignonette, and hot sauce. He also bought caviar, foie gras pate, and we stood in the longest line I’d ever witnessed for coffee. I didn’t realize we were hosting a party today with all this food. What looked like a haphazard shopping trip translated into a wonderful picnic lunch. With a satisfied look, he led me back to the apartment, not noticing that I hadn’t said a word the entire time. How was I going to stay mad when he picked out only my favorites? His attentiveness might have saved him this time.
When we got back, Jane was grazing on everything we had brought back from our bike ride.
“Why did you guys ride this far? You could’ve just gone across the street.”
“I don’t know. Ask your brother.” I pretended to sound angry and headed into Jane’s room to take a shower.
Jake ran in behind me as I struggled to curb my giggle. He grabbed my hand and stopped me right before I shut the bathroom door on him. I tried my best to put on an angry face.
“Emily…” He dragged my name again. “Are you mad?”
“Yes.”
“Sweetheart, I’m sorry.” He tried to kiss me, but I purposely moved away and startled him. He never liked it when I turned away his embrace.
“Jake,” I paused momentarily to swallow the guffaw that screamed to be let out. “I can’t be in this relationship with you if you continue to stay angry at me for not having sex with you. Here, let me give you back this ring.” I fumbled at the necklace, hoping that he would stop me before I unclasped it.
Locking my hands behind my back, he brought his lips hard on mine and left me gasping for air. If he knew only in the slightest how much I wanted him, there would be no apology necessary.
“OK, I’m sorry. I won’t be upset anymore.” His lips came down on mine a few more times. “But I’m still going to try to get you in bed every chance I get.”
“I’d be worried if you didn’t.”
Jake was finishing our basket when I came out ready for the rest of our day.
“Jane, you’re joining us, right?”
“No,” both Reid siblings answered at the same time. Jane looked offended that Jake had decided for her, even though she gave me the same answer.
“My old roommate, Allison, is coming over and we’re going out for lunch.”
“Allison?” Jake had a peculiar look on his face. “What’s she doing in town, and why’s she coming over all of a sudden?”
“I don’t know. I was going to ask you the same question. She called out of the blue, asked me where you were, and when I told her you were here, she insisted on coming over right away.” Within seconds, Jane shook her head. “Oh, my gosh. You didn’t finally succumb to her wiles, did you? Jake! Did you two date? Did you sleep with her? You’re such an idiot! No wonder she kept asking about you.”
“Who’s Allison?” I asked.
Jake ignored both of us and hurried me out the door. Of course his past was not so kind, and Allison—tall, thin, and gorgeous—came running toward Jake wrapping her arms ever so longingly around my boyfriend’s neck.
“Jake! I’m so happy to see you.” I let go of Jake’s hand so he could greet his whomever she is or was.
“Uh, hi, Allison.” At this point this woman had the gall to not only hug my boyfriend, but kiss him on the lips. I was floored, Jake looked appalled, and Jane gasped, horrified. Jake quickly pushed her aside and tried to grab my hands again but I didn’t give him the pleasure.
“Hello,” Allison turned her hand out to me. “I’m Allison, Jake’s friend.” She giggled.
Ugh!
“Nice to meet you. I’m Emily, Jake’s girlfriend,” I answered as sweetly as possible. Take that! As annoyed as I was with this woman, it didn’t rival Jake’s terrified look as he kept searching for my perturbed expression.
“Jake. I rushed over here because I need to talk to you. Can you spare a few minutes for an old flame?”
At this point, I felt bad for Jake more than anything else. I decided to bow out and let them finish their conversation.
“I’ll see you at the car,” I whispered to Jake. “Jane, will I see you before I leave tonight?”
“Probably not. I’ll see you in Hawaii.” She hugged me and pleaded her brother’s case. “Please don’t be too upset with him.”
Jake tried to hold on to me, but I grabbed our blankets and wine case and went out to the car. I turned on the music and sat patiently waiting for Jake to arrive. He probably only took a few minutes to talk to this person but it felt like hours. A myriad of thoughts ran through my head, but I decided to shut it out and enjoy the rest of our day together.
Jake jumped into the car with a most guilty look. “I’m so sorry about…”
“It’s OK,” I cut him off.
“Don’t you want to know why she was here?”
“I prefer not to know, if that’s OK with you. I know you didn’t live under a rock before you met me. You’re thirty. I’m sure you’ve dated many girls before I came along. Though you only told me about Kelley. I prefer not to know what you did before us, OK?”
Jake started the car and headed north.
“Where are we going? I’m really hungry again, not to mention exhausted, after our marathon biking session.” I couldn’t tell whether Jake’s silence signaled guilt or anger about this morning’s ordeal. Not liking the silence, I decided to explain why I didn’t want to hear about Allison.
I reached over to hold his hand. “Jake?”
“Hmm?”
“Why are you so quiet? Did I do something wrong again?”
“Emily, why would you think you did anything wrong?”
“Well, generally when someone stops talking to you, it’s because they’re upset with you. All right…let me explain why I don’t want to hear about that vile woman.”
This brought a chortle out of Jake.
“When I was waiting in the car for you, I realized you were right when you said it’s not good to know too much about each other’s past. Watching her kiss you unsettled me to a point where my mind raced in all directions, jumping to conclusions about your relationship with her, past and present. Unpleasant would be a mild way of explaining what I felt.”
This explanation only brought on a guiltier look.
“But then I thought about what you had to witness on Friday with me and Max, and I decided whatever I felt this morning couldn’t have compared to what you must have felt meeting my only boyfriend of four years. So, I thought it only fair to let everything go and enjoy the rest of the day.”
His eyes expressed appreciation and we enjoyed the rest of the day at an oyster farm about an hour north of the city. It never ceased to amaze Jake how much I ate. He watched in amusement as I tried to shuck an oyster with no success. Jake also found no success trying to top oysters with the goodies that we brought. His toppings fell off the shell or slid to the side. We decided he should shuck the oysters while I created my masterpieces of oysters with caviar, oysters with mignonette and hot sauce, and grilled oysters with melted cheeses, hot sauce, and pancetta—that was the winning combination. A bottle of wine later, I needed dessert and coffee to wake me up or I would end up asleep on our picnic blanket among a crowd of people.
“Jake, how did you know Parisian macarons are my favorite dessert? I don’t think I ever told you this, did I?”
His lips curled into a most endearing expression. “You have this almost wistful look in your eyes when you talk about or see something you like.”
“That’s exactly what my mom used to tell me. While you call it wistful, she called it covetous.” I laughed. “How boring and predictable am I when you’ve figured me out this easily and so quickly,” I stated with chagrin.
“On the contrary, I find you to be the most interesting and desirable woman I’ve ever met. I can’t get enough of you.”
I felt blood rushing to my cheeks. “That’s only because I’m the one girl who hasn’t jumped into bed with you on the first date.” I saw blood rushing to his cheeks as well.
Waiting out a delay on the runway at SFO, I couldn’t keep my eyes open. Jake pulled up the armrest, placed his arms around my waist and had me snuggle into his chest. I could never tire of this sense of being desired. Drifting into unconsciousness, Jake kissed the top of my head whispering three words that gave me goose bumps. Perhaps I was only dreaming.