Chapter 4
Nightmares
(Olivia)
Screaming wakes me from an already troubled sleep. The sound of Mason’s voice calling out in fear and pain jolts me out of bed and sends me running down the hall. Pushing through his door, the yelling doubles in volume. Mason lays on the bed thrashing. I hurry over to him, unfortunately all too familiar with this routine.
“Mason,” I call out as loudly as I dare. I don’t want to wake the rest of the house. “Mason!”
With his eyes squeezed shut, he continues to thrash and mumble words I can’t pick out of the chaos. I try calling his name several more times, but he won’t respond. Worry begins building in my heart. It’s never been this hard to wake him before. With all the new revelations and stress he’s had to deal with today, I am concerned this is more than just nightmares.
Dodging his flailing arms, I reach in and grip his shoulder hard. My plan was to give him a quick shake, but before I have the chance, Mason’s eyes snap open wide and terrified. His whole body freezes, his eyes not seeing anything but the horrible memories I know are replaying in his mind.
“Mason,” I whisper. My fingers tighten on his shoulder, but I am afraid to move him. “Mason,” I try again.
When his whole body starts shaking, I panic.
“Mason. Mason! Wake up. Please, you’re scaring me!” I grab his other shoulder and hold on tight as he continues to shake. I am half a second away from calling out for my dad when Mason suddenly wakes up.
For a moment he seems confused, then his eyes find mine and his arms practically strangle me as he yanks me into his lap. His face is buried in my hair, hiding from everything before I can even react.
“Ollie,” he whispers. “Ollie, you’re here. Don’t leave, Ollie. Don’t leave.”
The torture in his voice breaks my heart. My arms tighten around him. “I’m not going anywhere, Mason.”
We hold each other until Mason’s body stops trembling, until my heartbeat climbs the ladder back down from rabbit-speed to normal. Even once the night no longer feels like it is collapsing in on us, we stay in each other’s arms. I am afraid to let go. The irrational fear that the nightmares will start again if we slip apart keeps me from doing anything. I don’t know if Mason feels the same fear, but he makes no move to push me aside either.
Time is indeterminable in this moment. It doesn’t matter. All that matters is Mason.
“Thank you,” Mason whispers in the darkness. “Thank you for staying with me.”
Gently, I push back just enough so we can see each other. “Are you okay now?”
There is indecision in his eyes before finally saying, “Yeah, I guess.”
“Liar,” I say. I start to stand up, but Mason latches onto my arm before I can get more than a few inches away, proving my point. Instead of saying so, I press my hand against his cheek. “Hey, I’m not going anywhere. I’m just moving so I can rub your shoulders. It always helps you calm down after a nightmare, so scoot up.”
Mason does as he is told and I settle on the bed behind him. I have to stack a couple of pillows beneath me so I can comfortably reach his shoulders, but as soon as my fingers start kneading away at his knotted up muscles, I hear him sigh in relief. As I work at his stress, my mind works at puzzling out tonight’s odd events.
Most nights, Mason has nightmares about what happened to his family. They are always scary and leave him feeling the loss all over again, but tonight was different. I have never heard him screaming like he did tonight. It scared me half to death when he woke me. Not being able to wake him for so long was even worse. Something about his nightmare tonight was different. I want to ask him about it, but usually all asking questions gets me is silence and a sour mood. Still, I am worried enough to risk it.
“Mason, what happened tonight?”
His shoulders shrug under my fingers. “Nightmares,” he mumbles.
“The same as usual?” I question. “Because you haven’t called me Ollie since we were little. And even then, you only called me that when you were really upset.”
When Mason hesitates, I know I am right. Maybe pushing him to talk is selfish, but this feels important and I am not willing to let it go. My silence is enough of a push after several minutes.
“It started out the same,” he says slowly.
“It was about your family at first?”
Mason nods. “Every night it’s the same. Screaming, crying. Watching them come, watching them hurt my family… my sister.”
Sister? My hands slow as I falter. Mason has never said anything about a sister before. I knew he wasn’t an only child, but he’s never shared any specifics with me. Just talking about them is too much. It is a struggle to continue massaging his shoulders with my shaking hands as I realize Mason may have witnessed his sister’s death.
“Everything was the same until I got away,” Mason says quietly.
When Mason doesn’t continue right away, my mind is taken back to the day I saw Mason standing in our front yard. He was filthy, but I barely noticed. His tears were what captured my attention. I had never seen him in the neighborhood before, but I quietly went out the front door even though I knew I wasn’t supposed to go in the front yard without my mom. When I sat down on the front steps beside him, he nearly jumped right out of his shoes.
For a moment, I thought he was going to run away. Then, suddenly, he stopped crying. He looked at me as if he was confused about something. When he reached out and touched my cheek, I didn’t flinch away. Wanting to make him feel better, I asked him if he wanted to play with me.
I was too young to question where his parents were. Later that night when he asked if he could stay the night at my house, I was more than happy to say yes. I had no idea at the time that his entire family had been murdered and he had nowhere else to go. I was just happy to have made a new friend and I wanted to do everything I could to make sure he was happy and didn’t cry anymore.
“Mason, how did the nightmare change?” I ask.
“I found you,” he says slowly, “which I usually don’t. It always ends with me running away, scared and alone. This time, I made it to your house, and then all of the sudden we were older, the same age we are now. I thought everything was fine until they came back. Then it started happening all over again.”
“What started?”
Mason shudders. “The killing.”
“The… what?”
“They found me. They wanted to hurt me again, but they couldn’t get to me. They hurt your mom and dad instead. I tried to protect Evie, but no matter what I did, it wasn’t enough. And then …” Mason’s voice breaks. His head drops and his hands come up to press against his head. “… then they came after you. I couldn’t stop them. They hurt you. They took you away from me.”
It isn’t just his nightmare that shocks me. I haven’t seen Mason cry since the day we met, but I can feel his body shuddering now as he tries to hold back sobs. When I slide one of my hands to his face, he presses against it and the tears tumble over my fingers. Words come slowly, yet my breathing is rapid as fear sets in.
“Mason, it was just a dream. No one is going to hurt us,” I say, more of a prayer than a statement.
“What if it’s not?” Mason asks when his body begins to calm.
More frightened by that statement than I let on, I say, “What do you mean?”
Mason reaches up and stops my hands from rubbing his back. Gentle pressure pulls my arms over his shoulders. I quickly fold them around him in a hug, resting my chin on his shoulder. His own arms follow suit.
When Mason doesn’t answer my question, I say, “Mason, as scary as it was, it’s just a dream. All that stuff with Robin today has you freaked out. No one is going to hurt us or take you away.”
“Why did it happen the first time?” Mason demands.
“You mean to your family?”
I can feel all my hard work getting reversed as Mas
on’s body begins to tense back up. His voice is rough when he says, “Why did they die? Who killed them?”
He knows I have no clue what even happened, let alone who was responsible. But after talking to Robin today, I know what he is really asking. “Do you think those Sentinels Robin mentioned had something to do with what happened to your family?”
As if having someone other than him voice his thoughts makes them easier to deal with, Mason’s shoulders relax slightly. “I don’t know. Maybe.” Leaning his head against mine, Mason sighs. “If they killed Eliana, maybe that’s what they were trying to do to me.”
“But, why would they hurt your family? Robin’s family wasn’t harmed.”
“My family would never let anyone hurt me,” Mason says almost angrily.
“And Robin’s would?” I ask. I don’t question his family’s commitment, but I wonder why he doubts Robin’s.
Mason doesn’t answer right away. His jaw works back and forth as he chooses his words. “She feels guilty about something.”
His words remind me of the way she teared up when she talked about secrets. I doubted her then, and I find myself siding with Mason now, as well. Robin is hiding something.
“Besides,” Mason interrupts, “they couldn’t find me when they showed up. My mom was making pancakes that morning. When she went to the pantry to look for syrup, I hid under the sink. I loved to surprise her. It made her laugh, and I loved the sound of her laugh.”
I sit absolutely still and perfectly quiet as Mason talks about his mother, afraid that the slightest sound or movement will end his sharing. I wait as Mason swipes at a stray tear. He sniffs before continuing.
“I was under the sink when I heard a loud bang. My mom screamed. I tried to get out of the cupboard, but she pushed the door back shut. They didn’t know I was there, but I remember an unfamiliar voice calling out for me. Whoever they were, they wanted me.”
Without warning, catching my breath seems impossible. I don’t know if I can handle the thought that someone might actively be trying to hurt Mason. Before I can stop myself, I feel tears begin sliding down my cheeks. I’m not the only one who feels them. Mason reaches up and touches my face, seeming startled when he realizes I am crying. Not that I can blame him. I’m about as much of a crier as he is.
“Oh, Ollie,” he says softly. His strong, but gentle arms easily pull me out from behind him and nestle me against his body. I curl against him as I try to shut out the fear that is quickly swallowing me up.
“Mason, I can’t bear the thought of losing you,” I whisper against his chest.
His arms press me against him so tightly there is no space left between us. “I’ve already lost one family. I won’t lose you, too.”
The night quiets as we lay in each other’s arms. Slowly, Mason’s breathing calms. As he relaxes, my own fears begin to calm as well. They don’t disappear, but they come down to a manageable enough level that I can think and ask the question lingering in both of our minds.
“Mason, what do we do now?”
He sighs. His fingers stroke my hair softly. “I don’t know. I’m not sure how to get more information out of Robin without telling her the truth.”
“We can’t tell her the truth. We have no idea who she’s really involved with. It’s too big of a risk.”
“I know, but we have to stay close to her, too. If she is a threat, we can’t be blind to it.”
I know he’s right, but I don’t like to think about Mason being so close to someone who could potentially hurt him. But what choice do we have? I look up at Mason and find him already staring down at me with a look of concern. Something about the moment makes my heart lurch. It takes me a few seconds to gather my thoughts.
“Mason, we’ll figure this out,” I promise.
As his fingers brush against my cheek, that strange sensation flashes again, but I am too anxious to pay it much attention.
“Out of everything Robin told us today, do you know what hurt the most?” Mason asks, surprising me by his change in topic. He doesn’t wait for me to answer. “Robin said something like sometimes it’s hard to remember ‘I wasn’t human,’ that I was sent here to be raised by Caretakers. Do you realize what that means? Not only am I not human, my family isn’t even my real family. All of the sudden, I’ve lost another family, one I never knew, maybe one that didn’t even want me to begin with.”
“We’ll find answers, Mason.”
I know it’s not much as far as comfort goes, but I don’t know what else to say. I have no idea why anyone would give up someone as wonderful as Mason. If his biological parents didn’t want him, their stupidity was our gain. I can’t imagine my life without Mason.
I have no idea what time it is, but weariness begins to creep over me. My eyes are starting to close when Mason asks one last question.
“Do you think Robin is right about me not being human?”
A yawn stretches my jaw before I can answer. “I don’t know. Maybe. You are invisible.”
“Does that bother you?” he asks quietly.
My shrug is more of a twitch as sleeps tries to steal me away. “Why would it? I love you no matter where you came from.”