19.
The Brown Man with Queer Feet
Early in the following morning Jurgen left Cameliard, travelingtoward Carohaise, and went into the Druid forest there, and followedMerlin's instructions.
"Not that I for a moment believe in such nonsense," said Jurgen:"but it will be amusing to see what comes of this business, and itis unjust to deny even nonsense a fair trial."
So he presently observed a sun-browned brawny fellow, who sat uponthe bank of a stream, dabbling his feet in the water, and makingmusic with a pipe constructed of seven reeds of irregular lengths.To him Jurgen displayed, in such a manner as Merlin had prescribed,the token which Merlin had given. The man made a peculiar sign, androse. Jurgen saw that this man's feet were unusual.
Jurgen bowed low, and he said, as Merlin had bidden: "Now praise beto thee, thou lord of the two truths! I have come to thee, O mostwise, that I may learn thy secret. I would know thee, and would knowthe forty-two mighty ones who dwell with thee in the hall of the twotruths, and who are nourished by evil-doers, and who partake ofwicked blood each day of the reckoning before Wennofree. I wouldknow thee for what thou art."
The brown man answered: "I am everything that was and that is to be.Never has any mortal been able to discover what I am."
Then this brown man conducted Jurgen to an open glen, at the heartof the forest.
"Merlin dared not come himself, because," observed the brown man,"Merlin is wise. But you are a poet. So you will presently forgetthat which you are about to see, or at worst you will tell pleasantlies about it, particularly to yourself."
"I do not know about that," says Jurgen, "but I am willing to tasteany drink once. What are you about to show me?"
The brown man answered: "All."
So it was near evening when they came out of the glen. It was darknow, for a storm had risen. The brown man was smiling, and Jurgenwas in a flutter.
"It is not true," Jurgen protested. "What you have shown me is apack of nonsense. It is the degraded lunacy of a so-called Realist.It is sorcery and pure childishness and abominable blasphemy. It is,in a word, something I do not choose to believe. You ought to beashamed of yourself!"
"Even so, you do believe me, Jurgen."
"I believe that you are an honest man and that I am your cousin: sothere are two more lies for you."
The brown man said, still smiling: "Yes, you are certainly a poet,you who have borrowed the apparel of my cousin. For you come out ofmy glen, and from my candor, as sane as when you entered. That isnot saying much, to be sure, in praise of a poet's sanity at anytime. But Merlin would have died, and Merlin would have died withoutregret, if Merlin had seen what you have seen, because Merlinreceives facts reasonably."
"Facts! sanity! and reason!" Jurgen raged: "why, but what nonsenseyou are talking! Were there a bit of truth in your silly puppetrythis world of time and space and consciousness would be a bubble, abubble which contained the sun and moon and the high stars, andstill was but a bubble in fermenting swill! I must go cleanse mymind of all this foulness. You would have me believe that men, thatall men who have ever lived or shall ever live hereafter, that evenI am of no importance! Why, there would be no justice in any sucharrangement, no justice anywhere!"
"That vexed you, did it not? It vexes me at times, even me, whounder Koshchei's will alone am changeless."
"I do not know about your variability: but I stick to my opinionabout your veracity," says Jurgen, for all that he was upon theverge of hysteria. "Yes, if lies could choke people that shaggythroat would certainly be sore."
Then the brown man stamped his foot, and the striking of his footupon the moss made a new noise such as Jurgen had never heard: forthe noise seemed to come multitudinously from every side, at firstas though each leaf in the forest were tinily cachinnating; and thenthis noise was swelled by the mirth of larger creatures, and echoesplayed with this noise, until there was a reverberation everywherelike that of thunder. The earth moved under their feet very much asa beast twitches its skin under the annoyance of flies. Anotherqueer thing Jurgen noticed, and it was that the trees about the glenhad writhed and arched their trunks, and so had bended, much ascandles bend in very hot weather, to lay their topmost foliage atthe feet of the brown man. And the brown man's appearance waschanged as he stood there, terrible in a continuous brown glare fromthe low-hanging clouds, and with the forest making obeisance, andwith shivering and laughter everywhere.
"Make answer, you who chatter about justice! how if I slew you now,"says the brown man,--"I being what I am?"
"Slay me, then!" says Jurgen, with shut eyes, for he did not at alllike the appearance of things. "Yes, you can kill me if you choose,but it is beyond your power to make me believe that there is nojustice anywhere, and that I am unimportant. For I would have youknow I am a monstrous clever fellow. As for you, you are either adelusion or a god or a degraded Realist. But whatever you are, youhave lied to me, and I know that you have lied, and I will notbelieve in the insignificance of Jurgen."
Chillingly came the whisper of the brown man: "Poor fool! Oshuddering, stiff-necked fool! and have you not just seen that whichyou may not ever quite forget?"
"None the less, I think there is something in me which will endure.I am fettered by cowardice, I am enfeebled by disastrous memories;and I am maimed by old follies. Still, I seem to detect in myselfsomething which is permanent and rather fine. Underneath everything,and in spite of everything, I really do seem to detect thatsomething. What role that something is to enact after the death ofmy body, and upon what stage, I cannot guess. When fortune knocks Ishall open the door. Meanwhile I tell you candidly, you brown man,there is something in Jurgen far too admirable for any intelligentarbiter ever to fling into the dustheap. I am, if nothing else, amonstrous clever fellow: and I think I shall endure, somehow. Yes,cap in hand goes through the land, as the saying is, and I believe Ican contrive some trick to cheat oblivion when the need arises,"says Jurgen, trembling, and gulping, and with his eyes shut tight,but even so, with his mind quite made up about it. "Of course youmay be right; and certainly I cannot go so far as to say you arewrong: but still, at the same time--"
"Now but before a fool's opinion of himself," the brown man cried,"the Gods are powerless. Oh, yes, and envious, too!"
And when Jurgen very cautiously opened his eyes the brown man hadleft him physically unharmed. But the state of Jurgen's nervoussystem was deplorable.