“Wow! You’re such a bore!” She muttered under her breath when she stepped out beside me.
I didn’t have the energy to think of a smart remark to that. My mind is busy deciphering my feelings. Something inside me wants to make me punch myself. There was a hole in my chest that I cannot explain.
When Alizia’s cab sped off, I decided to walk home.
I feel like I’ve been hit by a truck. And all because I saw Astrid cry rivers of tears because of me. The feel of her skin against mine is all too familiar.
I still don’t know what she did to make me fall for her. It seems like a lot of my previous decisions revolved around her. I even agreed to make Paris the CEO of my bars so it could give me more time away from the business. I wouldn’t normally do that. I would usually want to be hands-on. But I gave Paris full control of my own business except for Malibu, which I wanted to handle myself.
And I guess I know why. Astrid is in Malibu. Of course! It gives me a reason to be where she is. So I didn’t give up my bars in the city. I even used this as an excuse to see her. Stupid! When did I become stupid for a woman?
Thinking about Astrid’s beautiful face, and curves that seem to be at the right places, I thought maybe… it’s time for me to visit Malibu.
Chapter Twenty-Eight
GUARDIANSHIP:
Legal term which is used to describe the legal and practical relationship of a parent and a child, which includes the right of the parent to make decisions for his or her child as well as his or her responsibilities to take care for his or her child.
Astrid.
“Damn it!” I shrieked when I opened my office and found a tall figure standing by my window.
Then my heart hammered in my chest when I realized who it was.
I got that familiar urge to run after him and throw myself in his arms, thinking that he will catch me, like he always did in the past. But I know, I will hit the wall this time.
Then I got that usual flicker of hope that he would have remembered even a fraction of his time with me. Or he somehow felt our connection. Or he’s even willing to work on it until he finally heals. I know I whacked him on the face the last time I saw him in Manhattan. Did he come here because somehow, he regained some memories back?
“Ryder.” I breathed.
He turned around and looked at me. “So this is what you did with my money?” He asked quietly.
Anger flared inside me again. This Ryder is such an asshole! He doesn’t miss a chance to insult me. If I met him like this, I would not have fallen in love with him. But then, before my Ryder went away, he sort of warned me about this. I remembered what he said to me before he got into that stupid accident.
“Always remember that I love you, okay? I’ll always be that guy who would do anything to protect you, make you happy. I want you to know that even before I met you, you were the woman I needed, the woman I have been looking for.”
Maybe this is what he meant. The old Ryder Van Woodsen didn’t have much faith in people, especially women. And maybe I did change him. Maybe I had a positive effect on his life too.
I don’t want to give up on him. Not when he never gave up on me, on us. He patiently waited for me to come around, to realize that he’s the one for me all along. And I must have broken his heart over and over too. But he never showed me signs of giving up. He stood strong. My rock. My knight.
I should do the same. I will wait until he finally finds his way back to me. No matter how much he hurts me or shuts me down, I know this isn’t him. I know this Ryder was just guarding his emotions from something he doesn’t understand, something he doesn’t know. But once he regains his memories of me, he will come back.
“I don’t see why I would be interested in these.” He said. “I don’t believe in marriage. My father went through a lot that didn’t work.”
I took a deep breath. “You believed in me.” I told him.
He looked at me for a moment. I held my head high and looked back at him. I didn’t back down. Then finally, as if he couldn’t take it anymore, he looked away.
“I’m sorry, Miss Jacobson, this is… not… working out for me.” He said in an almost broken voice, as if he too, was not sure of what he’s doing.
“Wh-what?”
He turned his back on me. “Call your lawyer.” He said. “Let’s try to do this as easy as possible. I’m pulling out my investment here.”
“But Ryder…” I trailed off. What is he saying? Moreover, what am I going to do about it?
I cannot believe this is happening! I cannot believe he could be this harsh. I will be jobless when he shuts my business down.
Just as if on cue, Adam appeared in the room, his eyes looking at me and then at Ryder.
“Van Woodsen.” He greeted Ryder, his voice cold. “I guess you also don’t remember me. I’m Adam Ackers.”
“Attorney Ackers?” Ryder asked. Adam nodded. “You were the one who executed the deed for this company. Good thing you are here. I have no idea what went through my mind when I decided invest in this. But now, I’d like to undo what I did.”
“Great! If only you can un-do my cousin too.” Adam muttered under his breath. Ryder raised a brow at him. “Never mind.” Adam said. “Just so you know, Mr. Van Woodsen, you’re gonna have to compensate Astrid a lot for this. Her contract states that you are to pay two years worth of her salary should you decide to pull the plug on her.”
“Two years?” Ryder echoed.
“Adam! That’s not true! Why would you do that?”
“Because when Van Woodsen decided to put up this business, I know he was doing it to impress you. And back then I didn’t know what his intentions with you really were. So I decided to put a clause to make sure that you will be able to survive for at least two years after he’s done playing with you.”
“And I agreed?” Ryder asked, a little shocked.
“I’ll send you a copy of the contract. You’ll see that you signed for it, happily too. You told me you genuinely cared for her. And you know what, silly me, I believed you.”
Ryder looked at me for a second. “I don’t know her well enough to care this much.” He said quietly.
“I know.” Adam said coldly. “And I was afraid for her, so I made sure she will be taken care of.”
“Adam, you don’t have to do this.” I begged silently.
Adam stared at me for a while, completely apologetic, but I can also see that he’s not taking any more bullshit from Ryder Van Woodsen. He’s seen me cry more than enough.
Adam reached out and touched my cheek. He looked at me reassuringly. He gave me a warm smile that made me want to cry even more. I thought Adam was the most unemotional person I know, but I can see now he really cares for me.
“You said you two are cousins?” Ryder asked, watching us. Right! He forgot everything, never met me, never met Adam.
“Yes and no.” Adam replied. “We’re not related by blood.” Adam said still not taking his eyes away from me, as if assuring me to trust him and he will make it right.
“Oh really? So would you please get your hands off her?!” Ryder scowled.
Both of us stared at him. I didn’t expect it but he looked so angry at Adam… for touching me? The same brotherly way that he always does.
“Excuse me, Mr. Van Woodsen?” Adam asked, dropping his hands and raising his brow at Ryder.
As if he realized what he just did, Ryder turned away from us and looked outside the window.
“Draw up the papers. Minimize my losses. Pay her whatever severance pay you see fit. I want out.” He said curtly and then he walked away without looking at me again.
Adam turned to me. “Are you okay?”
I nodded at first, and then I shook my head. And tears rolled down my cheeks again. Adam reached out and hugged me.
“Damn it, Astrid! How many more of these are we going to face? When are you going to give up on that guy? You deserve better than this.”
“I can’t give up, Adam. I lo
ve him.” I said.
“I know. But he doesn’t even remember you.”
“He… he made me promise to always remember that he loves me. I will not break that promise. I will not give up. I will wait for him.”
Adam sighed and then he pulled away from me. “What do we do now that he wants to pull the plug on you?”
“How much does he want? How much did he invest here?”
Adam and I looked at all the reports that we have. Apparently, about fifty percent of Ryder’s investment has already come back. It’s cash available in the banks.
“What if I just buy him out?” I asked Adam, a far out idea coming to my head. Can I really do this alone?
The business is doing very well. I have four weddings lined up just this month alone and I don’t want to disappoint my clients. I cannot shut down. Just because my ‘ever after’ is in jeopardy doesn’t mean I will let down the clients who put their faith in me.
Adam gave me the figure needed to raise Ryder’s investment. My heart sank. The money that I currently have is just not enough to make the fifty percent. I’m still short, even if I put all my savings into it.
Adam reached out for my hand. “I know you really want this, Astrid. I will lend you the money.”
“Adam, it will take a year for me to return it to you.”
“Then it takes a year or more.” He said. “Or if your stupid boyfriend wakes up earlier than that, I’m sure he’ll be begging to put back his investment here.”
I bit my lip. Four months, I have been waiting for Ryder to wake up. Nothing is happening. I’m getting weaker and weaker everyday. It doesn’t help that he’s not even trying to remember me and what I was to him before his memories of me were taken away.
“Are you really going to do it for me?”
Adam nodded. “We may not be related by blood, Ash, but I’ve always loved you as my cousin.”
“I’ve always hated you.” I told him, laughing bitterly.
“I know.” He laughed.
I reached out to hug Adam. I will always be thankful for him. He has always been there, during the times I needed someone the most. And now, it seems that he is all I got for the second time in my life.
***
Ryder.
“You did what?” Janis almost shouted on the other end of the line when I told her that I am pulling out my investment from Astrid’s business. “Why do you have to be an ass, Ryder? Astrid will be jobless when you do that. And that was exactly the reason why you invested in her in the first place! You didn’t want her to be jobless. You wanted to help her but she wanted no help from you! So you devised a way to trick her into accepting your offer…” She trailed off, realizing that she said too much.
“Thanks!” I muttered sarcastically. I specifically told her not to tell me anything about my past with Astrid until I am ready to hear them.
“Undo this right now!” Janis demanded.
“Jan, why do you guys like her so much?”
Janis sighed. “Because she is a good person. She’s beautiful inside and out. And because she is a hundred times good for you. And…”
“Stop.” I told her. “I don’t want to hear about her again, okay?”
“Ryder, please! That business is everything to Astrid. She worked so hard to put it up. It’s doing well. You didn’t need the money! What were you thinking?”
“I just… I don’t know.” I sighed. In truth, I really don’t know why I wanted to pull out my money. I just didn’t want anything to do with her. I wanted no connection with her.
When I went to her office, I saw their portfolio and how good she is. The phone was ringing non-stop with inquiries. It’s a good, lucrative venture. And she is probably the best in town.
But I thought maybe she used me to get to her dreams. She must have cajoled me to invest on her to make her dreams come true.
But now, when Janis was saying to me that I tricked her into accepting my investment, I was not sure about what I did anymore. And I’m scared that when I wake up from all these, I will regret my decision.
“Undo it! I cannot believe you would hurt her like this!” Janis said angrily.
I sighed. “It’s too late. Her lawyer called.” Speaking of the good-looking lawyer, my blood boiled when I remembered how tenderly he touched Astrid, as if she was a crystal ball.
But she’s my crystal ball! At least that’s what everybody said to me. And even if I didn’t remember this, somehow I didn’t like the way he touched Astrid. They may be cousins, but they are still not related by blood. I don’t understand but un ugly, unfamiliar feeling swept through me, I couldn’t resist telling the guy not to touch her.
“Adam?”
“I guess that’s his name.” I replied. “He said Astrid is buying me out. She will continue to run the business and will return my investment to me.”
“Wow!” Janis breathed, and I can hear the admiration in her voice. “She’s really good if she’s saved enough to buy you out.”
“I think she is. I saw her portfolio.” I said. “But it’s too complicated for me, Janis. I want to remember Astrid… in my own time. I cannot go by what you guys tell me about her. I will not put my guard down for nothing.”
“Put your guard down?” Janis echoed angrily. “Sometimes, I want to take that guard from you and hit you so hard in the head with it so you will wake up from all these.”
I laughed humorlessly. “If that was guaranteed to work, I would do it myself, you know.” I sighed. “Speak to you later.” And I hung up.
I decided to go look around my house. I only have a faint memory of this house. It was new, I just bought it.
I opened my fridge, it was fully stocked. Funny. I haven’t been here for four months. But the house looked very well taken care of.
Of course.
She was here, just like she was in my apartment in Manhattan when I was in the hospital. Had I asked her to be here too?
I went to my room. I found that my clothes were all in order. The hamper is empty. One shelf of my cabinet has some pieces of clothing that are not mine. I took out a pair of lavender pajamas. Definitely not mine!
The bathroom also has some napkins, pink razor, and some other feminine stuff.
Dear God! I’ve been living with a woman! Somehow, it terrified me. I never thought I would be capable of doing this. And it made me even more curious. How did Astrid Jacobson make me do all these?
I never dated a woman long enough. I have had some flings. After we go to bed together, I call a cab for them. They barely even stay the night.
What has this woman done to me?
I went downstairs and took a box. I shoved all of her stuff into it. I don’t know if I asked her to live with me, but all that has changed now. I am not going to let her invade my personal space anymore.
Then I fished my phone from my pocket and scrolled to find her name.
Astrid Love
I blinked at the name on my phone. What the hell? How did she make me do this? Maybe she was lying. Maybe she really was a witch and she put me under a love spell.
“Ryder.” Her voice was soft like velvet. The sound is as familiar to me as it is strange. This is so confusing.
I took a deep breath, gathering the courage I needed. Gathering the courage to hurt her again… one last time.
“Can you come to my house? You left… a couple of your things here.” I said, as gently as I could.
There was silence. Then she said, “Okay. I will also return your key. What time are you going to be home?”
“I’ll be here all evening.” I replied.
“I’ll finish my meeting and then I will go there.” And she hung up.
I looked at the clock. It was eight o’clock. Astrid is coming to the house. Somehow, an unfamiliar feeling crept through me. My heart pounded in my chest and my pulse is hammering like crazy.
What the hell is wrong with me? Am I… excited?
Chapter Twenty-Nine
KISS:
&n
bsp; The groom kisses the bride at the end of the wedding ceremony to seal their union.
Astrid.
“I want you to stay here while I’m gone.” His words echoed in my head over and over. Tears were rolling down my cheeks.
Okay Astrid. Better cry now than later. Better here than in front of him.
I cannot show him how affected I was. No matter how much I beg, it’s not helping him. I haven’t given up on him yet. But I know that putting pressure on him will only make him run away more.