I wanted to kiss that frown away.
Heat fluttered in my belly, a sure sign that I was feeling a little better. “Mind if I turn out the lights? The headache is mostly gone, but I don’t want to risk teasing it into attack mode.”
“Go ahead.”
He nudged the door shut, then hit the lights before I could, leaving us cloaked in the sort of dim lighting that made us more shadows than details. I watched as he came closer to me, not quite within touching distance, but enough to make my pulse skip a beat.
“Now, let me say it again.” His voice slid over my skin like silk. “You should be at home.”
“I wanted to get a few things finished.” I held out my files for him to take. “You just need to sign off on these. I need to talk to Frederick about a couple of things, then make sure Sean can handle any disasters that might pop up. Then I’ll go home.”
He took the file and tossed it onto his desk without looking at it. “Tell Sean what you need to talk to Frederick about. Sean can figure out how to handle any disasters on his own.”
“I know how much it means to you for everything to go right next week–”
“I’m not worried about that.” He walked me back up against the door, caging me in with his arms on either side of my head. “Everything will be just fine if you take care of yourself.”
“You’re sexy when you get all gruff and protective like this.” Rising up on my toes, I kissed his chin. “Can we talk about–”
“No.” He kissed me, short and quick. “Go get some rest.”
“I’m fine, Dashiell.” Rolling my eyes, I curled my arms around his neck and smiled at him. The echo of a headache pulsed back at me in warning. Okay, maybe I wasn’t fine, but I didn’t need to be handled with kid gloves either. And he was sexy. Period. “Want me to show you how fine I am?”
Before he could respond, I pressed my mouth to his. He didn’t respond right away, so I flicked my tongue against the seam of his mouth. I felt his resolve break as he moaned. His hands slid down to my ass, gripping it tight as he boosted me up. When he settled me against the door, my breath shuddered out of me. He eased back and studied me, eyes lingering on my mouth as he considered something.
What he said next blew my mind.
“I’ve read studies where sexual activity can help ease the effects of migraines and severe headaches.”
My nipples immediately tightened, arousal flooding my body and dulling the throbbing in my head.
“Is…” I had to clear my throat before I could continue, “is that a fact?”
“Yes.” His lips sought out my ear, and I shivered as he nibbled gently. “Maybe we should put it to the test.”
“If this is your way of trying to get me to hurry up and go home with you ‘to rest,’ it might be working.”
One hot, breath-stealing kiss later, he murmured against my lips, “Who said I wanted to wait until you go home to try to help you out with this headache?”
I caught my breath at the spike of longing that went through me.
He lifted his head and looked down at me, clearly waiting.
I reached behind me and locked the door. “You told me you’ve had dreams about me and a desk…” I looked past him, “is that the desk?”
He cursed under his breath, his hand moving up to cup the back of my head. “You test my self-control, you know that?”
“How’s that?” I asked as he started to walk us over to the desk.
“Because I don’t want to make love to you. I want to fuck you.” His teeth scraped down the side of my neck. “I want to make you scream until your throat’s raw, then make you want to scream even more.”
A shiver ran through me as he set me on the desk. “And if that’s what I want?”
“Fuck, Astra.” He closed his eyes. “Don’t tempt me.”
“But it’s so much fun,” I teased. I reached between us and cupped him through his pants. He was already hard, and he sucked in a breath as I traced his cock with my fingertips.
“Astra...” He said my name like a warning.
“It doesn’t hurt to move,” I assured him. “And I know you can make me feel good.” I lightly squeezed him. “Please, Dash, make me feel good.”
He hesitated a moment, his eyes studying my face.
Then he was moving, pulling me off the desk, and flipping me around. My hands caught me as he bent me over it, my breath coming in ragged gasps as I lowered my torso until my cheek rested against the polished wood. I heard the sound of a zipper, then my skirt was pushed up, baring my ass.
He reached between my legs, growling as his fingers brushed over the sensitive skin there. “Fuck, you’re wet, darling.”
“Please,” I whimpered as my head gave a dull throb. I closed my eyes. “Make me feel good.”
The last word became lost in a cry of pleasure as he buried himself deep inside. One thrust without any preparation or warning. No time to prepare myself for the impossible feeling of being so full, being so connected. And he didn’t give me anytime either, driving into me hard and fast, hips slamming into my ass.
He tangled one hand in my hair, pulling me up onto my hands. A startled moan escaped me. I arched my back, desperate for more. Always more. More of him inside me, around me, with me. More of him in every way I could have him.
When he slid a hand down between the cheeks of my ass, I sucked in a breath. Fuck. When he dipped his thumb lower and gathered the slick wet heat from where we were joined, my vision started to go gray, because I knew what was coming.
Then his thumb was there, pressing against that previously unbreached ring of muscle. As he pushed that thick digit inside my ass, I began to shudder, quaking and writhing against him as my orgasm began to unfurl inside me, a slow implosion that started at my core and rocked outward until every part of me felt it.
I pressed my fist against my mouth, muffling the scream that wanted to escape.
Dash let go of my hair and caught my upper body to hold me firm. He buried his face in my hair, muttering words I couldn’t quite make out.
That was okay. I had a hundred, a thousand things trapped inside me that I wanted to say to him, but all I managed to get out was a strangled cry as he emptied himself inside me, coaxing another ripple of pleasure from my overly sensitized body.
A rush of contentment followed the pleasure. I could let go here and now. I was safe. Surrounded by him, filled by him. Completed.
“You should write a paper,” I said suddenly.
He gave me a narrow look as I finished washing up in the small bathroom attached to his office.
Solemnly, I matched his gaze. “It’s for the sake of science. A quick hard fuck with some anal play does wonders for relieving migraine pain.” I grinned at him. “I’ll vouch for you. If you want, we can do a few more experiments, just to be sure it works. At home. Tonight.” All of the muscles that had just gotten a lovely workout clenched. “Maybe even do a bit more experimenting with anal play.”
A dark look crossed his eyes, but then he shook his head. “If you keep this up, I won’t be able to escort you to your car without looking completely workplace inappropriate.”
“I’m fine,” I insisted. I felt better than fine, actually. “I can even finish up the rest of the work that’s backlogged on my desk.”
“One hour.” He curved his hand around the back of my neck and tugged me in for a kiss. “I don’t want you pushing it. Especially if you want to…experiment…tonight.”
My heart stuttered a bit, then started to race. Unlike before, there was no corresponding pounding in my head. It wasn’t quite all the way gone, but the lovely rush of endorphins in my body made it more than bearable.
Biting my lip, I met his eyes and smiled. “You’ve got a deal.”
As he walked me to the door, I paused. “You know, people will figure this out if they haven’t already.”
“Does that bother you?”
I looked up at him and answered honestly, “No, but I thought it might
bother you.”
He was quiet for so long, I started to get nervous. Then he shook his head. He turned to move behind his desk again, hands in his pockets as he stared outside. He didn’t look at me, but the thoughtful, pensive sound of his voice resonated deep. “It doesn’t bother me.”
“Okay.” I wouldn’t dance out of here. I wouldn’t. He was nervous, I could tell, but he was being honest.
“Astra.”
“Yes?”
“Would you like to go to a party with me on New Year’s Eve?”
I fought to keep my voice even. “Yeah, that sounds like fun.”
I walked out before I could do something silly, like throw my hands in the air and do some sort of ridiculous victory dance. I would save that for the privacy of my office.
I was done in forty-eight minutes. I beat the one-hour deadline and then some, even with my victory dance.
Excited and already anticipating the amazing evening Dash and I were going to have, I finished tidying up my desk and was about ready to head out when I saw the bag from the new age shop and remembered I’d promised to give some of the tea to Turk. It wouldn’t have been very nice of me to enjoy not having a headache when he still had one.
Not even if I would’ve preferred to be on my way home.
I grabbed the bag and hurried back to the break room, scooping some of it into a sandwich bag before returning to my office. Back there, I scrawled the directions on a sticky note and hoped he had a tea diffuser. If not, he’d better buy one because I had no idea what to do without one.
Then I headed out to find Turk. I caught up with him in his office, knocking on his door, and waving the bag at him.
“Sorry…I promised my mom I’d always say no.” He gave me a game smile.
“Dork.” Rolling my eyes at him, I moved into his office and held out the bag. “It’s that tea I told you about. For headaches and migraines.”
He took and studied it, holding the bag up and eying it warily. “What do I do, just boil it until it dissolves?”
“Tea doesn’t dissolve, you Neanderthal.” I put the note I’d scrawled on his desk. “Here are the instructions. I’m going to go out on a limb here and assume you don’t have a tea diffuser. Stop by a bed and bath store or even a grocery market. They’ll have one. Then you just follow the instructions. If it helps, I can hook you up on where to get more.”
“Does it help you?” He tossed the bag up, then down, not really looking at me.
“Better than just about anything else.” It was kind of weird, I realized. He wasn’t flirting with me. Today was the first time he hadn’t flirted with me in some way since we started working together. He wasn’t even looking at me.
An awkward silence stretched out, and he darted a look in my direction, then jerked his gaze away.
“Anyway, you give that a shot. It will cure what ails you,” I said lamely.
Pushing away from the bookshelf, I turned to go.
Dash stood just a foot or two outside the door. His eyes were glittering as they moved from me to Turk.
Heaving out a sigh, I lifted an eyebrow. “I’m heading out for the day – one hour, as promised.”
He said nothing, just turned on his heel and strode away. I frowned, annoyed. Seriously? What had gotten his panties in a twist? We’d just had amazing sex in his office, made plans for New Year’s Eve, and were moving toward having a public relationship. Was he really going to be pissy about me being a friend to a co-worker?
Before I reached the door, Turk cleared his throat. “So…I…well, I guess you and I aren’t going to be a thing, are we?”
“What?” I looked back to see him straightening up in his chair, toying with the bag on the desk. He was staring at the spot where Dash had been.
Now he met my eyes. “Heard a rumor about the two of you earlier…guess it’s not a rumor.”
Blood rushed to my cheeks as I speculated on what he might have heard, but I battled the sense of embarrassment down. Dash and I had done nothing wrong. “We’re seeing each other, yes.”
Turk just nodded. “He’s a decent guy, Astra. Good luck to you both.”
“Thanks.” With another smile, I turned to go.
I wanted to take a girly sort of bath, rest up…and get ready for a one-on-one with my man.
32
Dash
I spent the entire drive telling myself to be calm.
To be rational and reasonable.
Had I seen the signs? Had I overlooked them?
The biggest fucking sign, of course, I’d just witnessed in Turk’s office, and my mind was spinning in so many fucking circles, I couldn’t make heads or tails of anything else.
Needless to say, when I pulled through the gates at home, I wasn’t calm. I wasn’t rational or reasonable.
And I was just fine with that.
I’d been too calm with Layla, too understanding.
I wasn’t making that mistake again.
Slamming on the brakes so hard they squealed, I came to a stop in front of the guesthouse. I’d always kept a key on hand for emergencies, but I’d never used it. I also had the bypass code for the alarm system. I’d never used that either. I’d never had to with Didi, and I’d never thought I’d need to with Astra. I’d trusted her.
My first mistake.
I planned on using both today. Astra and I were going to have things out.
I let myself in through the front door. There was no need to disarm the system though. She’d never bothered to arm it. I shook my head. Not surprising. How could I expect her to respect her safety when she didn’t even respect her own health?
She wasn’t downstairs, but I didn’t call out her name. Instead, I moved upstairs, mentally rehearsing how I’d approach this.
I already knew what I was going to do with Turk in the morning, but Turk was a different story from Astra. He was just an employee. Astra...Astra wasn’t just anything.
Shoving the misery down deep inside, I paused at the top of the stairs, trying once more to be calm, rational. I needed to call out to her rather than trying for a surprise.
“Astra!”
I heard water splashing and followed it. As I stepped through the doorway, she came out of the bathroom tub like Aphrodite rising, and the need to grab her, shove her against the wall, slam inside her and fuck, fuck, fuck until none of this mattered was so strong, my fingers were already itching to touch her.
And that just pissed me off even more.
“You think you can sell drugs at my clinic, and I’m so wrapped up in you that I won’t notice or care?”
Shit. So much for calm and rational.
Her hands fell loose to her sides, the towel she’d grabbed dropping to the floor as she stared at me.
“What?”
How had she managed to mask the physical symptoms so well? No track marks. None of the usual sniffles that came with snorting shit. Not that it mattered.
“Don’t play dumb with me. I saw you, dammit! And you know I did. I saw you passing something to Turk. What the hell was it?”
Her eyes flashed at me like molten steel.
Make me be wrong. I wanted to yell it at her, but that would mean admitting how much she meant to me. I couldn’t do that. Not after everything that happened.
She climbed out of the sunken tub, descending the stairs as gracefully as if she were in a play, water rolling down pale skin. The towel she’d held had fallen into the still full tub, but she ignored it now, reaching instead for a robe hanging on the wall just a few feet away.
She turned away as she pulled it on, and I had to practice swallowing a few times, and not just because she was wet and naked either.
“Astra, we’re going to have this out,” I said, finally managing the calm tone I’d been striving for. Calm, cool, collected. Perfect.
But not quite as good as hers.
She turned and looked at me, her tone icy as she spoke, “Are we now?”
Then, saying nothing else, she cut around me and
headed into the bedroom.
“Yes, dammit!”
Shit. Gone was the calm, cool, collected tone. Already.
I followed her. As she went to open her closet, I caught her arm and pulled her around to face me. She didn’t resist. Not at all. And when she met my eyes, her iron-gray was completely clear.
Blank.
“We need to talk about this, Astra. I saw you with drugs today – in my clinic.”
She tugged against my hold hard enough that I knew she was serious. Letting go, I backed away. I didn’t want to hurt her. I just wanted to talk.
She, apparently, had other ideas because she turned and walked out of the bedroom.
Shit.
I started after her but heard the door slam just a few seconds later and knew there was no point. She was going for a walk, it seemed.
In her bathrobe.
I closed my eyes.
“So much for hoping she’d convince you that you were wrong,” I muttered.
She’d just run away. That could only mean one thing.
33
Astra
“Drugs.”
I wanted to scream.
Hit something. Like Dash. Hitting Dash would feel good. My palm right up against the back of that hard, cruel head of his.
He thought that stupid bag of tea I’d given Turk was drugs?
I should have gotten the rest of it out of my purse, then and there, and thrown it at him. Along with his keys. Both to his house and his clinic.
He thought I was into drugs.
Sniffing, I dashed at the tears rolling down my cheeks. He didn’t know me or trust me at all. That emotional, intimate connection I thought we had...I was clearly delusional. My mother was right about me.
I’d been all prepared to seduce him, and once he was wowed away by how hot and sexy I could be, I’d tell him he needed to get over this jealousy thing.
But now I knew he hadn’t been glaring at Turk because he was jealous.
He had been glaring at us because he thought we were passing drugs back and forth.