Brenna had finally slept about an hour before waking at six thirty, stretching, her body stiff from lying on the hard old couch. The fire had burned low and she stoked it to ward off the morning chill. The animals didn’t stir other than Zoe opening an eye and closing it again, obviously of the opinion it was too early for man or beast to be awake.
After making some coffee, Brenna took her mug and afghan out to her adirondack chair and, wrapping herself up, listened to the morning birds and enjoyed the breeze. By the time she was done drinking her coffee, she felt more peaceful and the last vestiges of the nightmare had fled. She returned to the living room where her pets still slumbered, and rocked in front of the fire, reading, until Zoe stirred herself at eight and went to the back door.
After a hot bath and washing the dishes, she felt ready for her visitor and right on time at ten, Ruth’s minivan pulled into the drive.
“Brenna, hi! I love your house,” Ruth greeted her enthusiastically, carrying zucchini bread and a gaily wrapped present. She handed Brenna the gift.
“What’s this?”
“A housewarming present. If this is your first real house, you need housewarming presents.”
“I like the way you think,” Brenna laughed. She led the way into the kitchen where Ruth and Zoe greeted each other warmly.
They settled at the kitchen table with coffee and Brenna opened her gift. She pulled back the flowered tissue in the flat box to reveal a pair of matching picture frames. They were made of ivory ceramic with pink roses.
“Thank you, they’re beautiful,” Brenna smiled. “I have a picture of Molly and me to go in one of them. I’ll have to look through my things for another one. They’ll look great in the living room...or the dining room. Hmm.”
She gave Ruth a tour through the house and showed her the improvements she'd made. As they passed through the dining room, Brenna told Ruth she was trying to finish the room so she could have Julie’s baby shower at her house. “Somehow I always end up doing other things. The other rooms are pretty much finished,” she said, leading her through to the parlor.
“Oh, Brenna, this is beautiful. You wallpapered this yourself? That’s quite an undertaking.” Ruth examined the wallpaper fitted closely to the curves of the rock fireplace.
“Well, I was too stupid to know better. Sometimes not knowing things can get you farther than you’d expect.”
Ruth smiled at her. “Isn’t that the truth. When Jake and I started the kennel, we thought we knew enough to get started, but every day we were calling another kennel with questions. The more we found out, the more we realized we didn’t know. But we loved the dogs and stuck it out and it finally took off. Now we’re doing well and people are calling us with questions.”
Brenna led the way upstairs. “From what I’ve seen, you’re doing a great job. I can't imagine Adam without Max.”
Brenna opened the guest room door and then showed Ruth her own room, pointing out the view.
“This is wonderful, I love this shade of pink. Was this Helena’s furniture?” Ruth stroked the well-polished burl nightstand.
“Yes, isn’t it beautiful? I still can’t believe she left it. She acts as though she knew I’d be here and left it for me.”
Ruth smiled. “Maybe she did. Some people know more than others, I think.”
Brenna remembered Helena’s comment on destiny. “I think you’re right.”
“This seems like a good time to discuss what’s been going on around here, if you still feel like it,” Ruth suggested.
“Oh, I feel like it, alright. Let’s go freshen our coffee,” and Brenna led the way back down the steep stairs.
Brenna carried a tray filled with zucchini bread and fresh coffee to the parlor where Ruth was sitting by the low-burning fire. The morning sun had hidden itself in the familiar ocean fog and the day had become chilly.
“This weather, just when you think it’s going to stay nice, there goes the sun.” Brenna set the tray on the hearth and they helped themselves. “Thanks for the bread, this is excellent.”
“You’re welcome. It’s one of Adam’s favorites. Okay, now, what drew you to this house?”
Brenna settled into her rocker and took a sip of her coffee before she spoke. “It was a good size for me...it had lots of flowering plants...I liked the flagstone walk, which I can’t use because I don’t want to move the roses over the front door.”
“Why not? Why don’t you just trim them back?”
“I couldn’t do that, they’re Victoria’s roses.”
“But what’s the significance of them hanging over the door?”
Brenna paused. “I don’t know, really. When I first came here, I went through the front door, but I never did again. Helena never used the front door after the roses grew over it. Maybe she associates them too strongly with Victoria...or maybe if Victoria couldn’t come through that door, no one else was going to, either.”
“How did you feel when you first moved in here?”
“Comfortable, as if I’d come home. As if I could hide away from the world here and only deal with what I wanted to deal with.”
“Do you still feel that way?” Ruth asked.
Brenna smiled ruefully. “Well, I’ve since realized you can only run so far. I may not have family or patients in front of me, but they continue to people my nightmares. I've begun to realize I could go to the Bahamas and still be haunted.”
“Do you feel haunted by Victoria?”
Brenna paused again. “You know how to cut to the chase. No, I guess I wouldn’t really say haunted because that denotes something negative. The dreams can be sad, but they’re just realistic...and some of them are happy or at least content.”
“What was the first dream you had?”
“It was so sad. It seemed at the time as if it was me; I didn't realize until later that it was someone else. I was sitting in this rocker, but upstairs in the guest room. All of a sudden, I went into labor too early. It was all I could do to make it to the head of the stairs and then my water broke and I fell down the stairs and passed out. After that, I've had dreams that weren’t in any chronological order, although lately they’ve been showing later parts of her life.”
“When did you realize the dreams were of Helena?”
“Well, I dreamed I, rather, she received a box of baby clothes from her family back east. We’re both from Michigan, oddly enough. Then I dreamed she lost the baby and couldn’t have any more. She was repacking the box and she put it in the attic. She thought of Martin and I remembered that was Helena’s husband’s name. It was all too much to be coincidence.”
“That must have been a little scary.”
“No kidding. I went to visit Helena and sounded out the secretary at the home to see if I could learn more about Martin. She didn’t tell me much, but I just began to accept this whole thing. I wish it would stop, honestly. I’m more than capable of having nightmares on my own.”
“What other kinds of nightmares do you have?” Ruth took another slice of bread and Zoe eyed her hopefully.
“My parents died in a plane crash years ago; I dream about that. Before moving here, I mainly had dreams about not being able to save my babies, my patients that is. I only have those occasionally now. The babies are impossibly small or we’re stuck in a fire or something. It’s really stressful and I usually wake up with a terrible headache.”
“How do you feel when you’re losing your babies?”
“Desperate...anxious, trying to get someone to help me and there’s no one around. Frantic...” Brenna sighed.
“Similar to a mother’s own feelings when trying to save her child, maybe not as strong, but similar. I wonder if Helena had such dreams here.”
Brenna stopped rocking. “I can’t believe that never occurred to me...how selfish of me.”
“Don’t be so hard on yourself. You’ve had enough of your own stuff to work on and Helena has had decades to reconcile her grief. A mother’s child is always in her heart but at Helena’s age she
’s probably thinking about being with Martin and Victoria soon rather than losing them.”
Brenna nodded. “Knowing Helena, you’re probably right.”
“It seems to me you’ve found a kindred spirit in this house. The emotions that have filled it for years are so similar to your own. Small wonder you’re comfortable here even with the dreams. I think the next question is, will they prevent you from healing rather than help you?”
Brenna ran her hands through her hair and stretched. “That’s a very good question. I have no idea. I know I have no interest in leaving.”
Zoe jumped up at the sound of Adam’s truck on the gravel drive.
“Good timing,” Brenna smiled. “I guess the one remaining question is how do these things occur?”
Ruth shook her head. “There are stranger things on heaven and earth, and emotions can be very strong.”
Adam knocked and opened the back door. “Okay, I’m here. Feed me.”
Chapter 34