"You expecting trouble?"
Rydia glanced to Edge in surprise. "What?"
He gestured to her white knuckled clasp on the whip. "You look like you're getting ready to fight someone. I hope I didn't do something. It's a little early for that."
She flushed "Sorry" and tied the whip to the belt of her gown. "Just a little tense this morning."
"I noticed."
"Lots of stuff to think about."
Edge nodded. "I noticed that, too."
"You've been noticing a lot of things this morning." Rydia shot him a quick glance in an attempt to gauge his reaction. Like usual, she couldn't tell what he thought or felt. Drat. "Congratulations."
He chuckled. "Nah. Don't bother. I'm just not as dense this morning, is all. I slept great."
You certainly did . . . . "That's good. It's always nice when we can have a restful night's sleep."
His smile faded as he looked over at her. "Didn't you?" Edge's question was laced with concern. She caught his gaze and smiled, inviting a return from him before he shifted his focus back down the trail. "Just checking."
"I always sleep good when you're around," she said, giggling. It was the truth, too.
Edge raised an eyebrow but didn't meet her gaze. "What is that supposed to mean?"
"Just what I said."
"Hm."
Rydia pushed at him with her shoulder. Laughter tickled the air. "Oh stop it, you big goof ball."
Edge pushed back, and his hand lingered on her arm. "I'm not a goof ball," he protested. "Just misunderstood."
Warm seriousness tingled within as she watched his handsome face. "I understand you, Edge. Almost always have."
One side of his lips tilted upward as he gently nudged Rydia's arm with his elbow. "I know, Dee, and I like that about us."
She took in a deep breath--persuaded herself it was courage--and wrapped her arms around his. She'd seen Rosa do it once to Cecil . . . . "So do I."
"You think that will change? Ever?" Thoughtfulness softened Edge's voice and, a moment later, he brought his hand across to gently stroke hers resting within the crook of his elbow.
Rydia shook her head, dropping her gaze to the path at her feet. "I hope not." Edge nodded in silent agreement. "I want us to be close forever. I like being able to talk to you. I like how we can be honest and . . . and real around each other. I like how we understand each other." She peeked at him, meeting his gaze, and halted. "I guess I never told you that, Edge. I really treasure your friendship. You know? Every hard thing you've ever said which got me to admit something to myself. Every silent night you spent listening to me vent about something that bothered me. Every time you seemed to know when to say something and when to just be quiet. You've been more of a friend to me than anyone I've ever known. I just want to say ‘thank you'."
She forced herself to hold his gaze, examining his features and those wonderful eyes while wishing he could somehow let her know what he thought about her. Hoping against hope that he could give her some clue as to whether she had a single chance of being an important part of his life. But he didn't say a word. He just stared down at her, probing her features as closely as she did his. Finally, she gave him a hesitant smile and stood on tiptoes to place a soft kiss on his cheek.
Red dusted his cheeks and ears once she pulled away. "Thanks, Dee. And, well, you're welcome." He regarded her with an odd and guarded expression. "Nobody's ever said anything like that to me before. Not like that. I don't know what to say--Actually, yes I do."
"You do?"
"Yeah." Edge smirked. "Believe it or not, I didn't ever have a lot of friends while growing up. They said I had a bad attitude."
"I remember."
He turned away, looping his thumbs on his belt as he stared down at the lush greenery underfoot. "I guess I do have an attitude, but . . ." he shot her a glance, "but you never let it get to you. You accept it, like everyone else in our little group. I learned a lot about life from you and the others, but I learned what it meant to be friends from you." Rydia flushed as he continued. "I got through my parents' death because you understood what I went through. I guess the others did, but not like you. You seemed to know what to say and when to say it. Idiot that I am, I never said thank you."
She smiled. "Well, we were kind of busy."
Lips curved in a smirk, he inclined his head. "Yeah. I guess we were." Then his smile wavered, his eyes darkening with an odd seriousness. "But you were never too busy to be there. You were never too busy to make sure I was all right with everything." She lowered her gaze, kicking at a puff of a weed. "Thanks, Dee. For everything. Don't change. You got that?"
Rydia raised her eyes to send him her most charming smile. "I got it."
He took her hand and gave it a gentle squeeze. "Come on. Let's get going."
Rydia was so afraid to lose the moment that she almost said ‘no'. But when they turned and began walking toward Baron again, Edge continued holding her hand. He even gave it another squeeze every once and a while, as if he needed to prove it was still there. In his grasp. Rydia worried her lower lip as she stared at the lush grass and fragrant flowers that tickled her ankles. What step am I supposed to take now?
She had no idea.
~@~
Edge didn't know what to do or say. For the first time in his life he was at a loss for words. He knew that whatever he did say wouldn't be taken the wrong way because she wasn't like that. If Rydia didn't understand what he meant, she'd ask. Point blank. If she thought he'd gone too far in his teasing, she'd tell him. Straight out. She was feisty. She always had been.
Edge felt the warmth in his right hand increase and squeezed. Oh yeah. I still have her hand. Should I let go? But he didn't want to. He liked how it felt. Liked how it made him feel to have it. He couldn't explain it. Didn't even want to try. What if she wants it back? He cleared his throat, but didn't risk a glance. He figured that if she wanted it back she'd take it. Hadn't he just told himself that was the type of girl she was?
Girl.
Girl?
Edge shook his head, immediately noticed Rydia's glance, and clenched his jaw. No. She's no girl. She's a beautiful young woman who makes me feel like a real person. He'd tell her, when the moment was right. He'd kiss her, too. He'd always wanted to, but the moment had never been . . . never been right. He didn't want her to slap his face. But she just kissed me . . . didn't she?
He squeezed her hand again, without really meaning to, and felt a little better when her hand returned his pressure. She could probably tell that he was thinking about something, hard. She'd always been like that. Seemed to read his mind sometimes. It's unnerving, but . . . but I like it. It made her easier to talk to. Of course, from the first moment he'd seen her he'd seemed to trip over his tongue to have a reason to speak to her. Always saying stupid things to get her to smile. Or plucking at her temper so that he could have those flashing eyes aimed at him and that cute mouth lashing him with so many words--
Edge felt the heat rising and cleared his throat. Cool it. You're going to make an ass of yourself. But he didn't really care. He'd made a fool of himself plenty of times, always in front of her and those eyes that didn't miss a thing. He was damned lucky to have her there, and he didn't want to lose that. I'll propose in Baron. I'll have Cecil be best man. Rosa can help Rydia . . . well, help her do whatever she'll need help with.
"Ouch."
Edge gave a startled twitch and blinked at her. She rubbed at the hand he finally released. His face flamed. "Did I hurt you? Here, let me see." He took her hand in both of his and gently touched the red sections where he squeezed too hard. His throat tightened as his stomach fell to the soles of his feet. "Man, Dee. I'm sorry."
Rydia smiled, hesitantly, rubbing at his arm with her free hand. "Hey, it's all right. No blood. No broken bones." She examined her hand still clasped in his. "Makes me wonder what you were thinking about, though."
She peeked at him from beneath those lush lashes, but Edge couldn't mee
t her gaze. All he could do was stare down at her little hand, at all the red marks he'd given her, and wonder what in the world he was doing there with her. A little spark of panic scorched his insides as he continued to stare at the marks. It was the first time he'd hurt her. He didn't like how it felt. What if I do it again? I never want to do that!
Edge dropped her hand suddenly and turned away, striding toward Baron. He could feel Rydia's shocked gaze, and moments later heard her call out "Edge? Edge, wait." He did, without even thinking about it. Then he clenched his jaw and balled his fists. She'll ask. You know she will. She'll ask what's wrong. She'll look at you with those big eyes, stare right into who you are, and ask what's going on. Then she'll see it. She'll see that you're afraid you'll hurt her again. Maybe she would even see how much he cared.
Edge felt her hand on his arm and tensed. She noticed that, too. Somehow he could tell.
"Edge, what's going on?"
He took in several deep breaths before answering. "Sorry, Dee. I panicked. I've never done anything like that before. It kind of freaked me out."
"Never done what before? Hurt me?" Rydia turned him around, and her hands continued to hold his arms as she peered up at him. "It was an accident. I know that."
She examined his face a moment, and then--much to his surprise--reached a hand up to cup his jaw and caress his cheek with her thumb, her smile as soft as anything he'd seen.
"It's all right," she said, her tone so gentle that it sent shivers and sparks up and down his spine. She lowered her hand. "Really."
Edge clenched and unclenched his hands as he stared down at her. Her lips were tilted upward in that caress of a smile and all he could do was focus on her lips, glistening in the sunlight. Soft. Slightly pink--Edge blinked and cleared his throat as he turned his head away. "Yeah. Right. Sure."
Rydia turned him back to the trail toward Baron, wrapping an arm around his waist to give him a squeeze as they began walking. "I've been hurt worse, Edge. Besides, I didn't mind so much. You seemed to feel better after you gave it a squeeze. It felt nice."
Edge released a slow breath as she let himself drape an arm around her shoulders. Why don't I just tell her and get it over with? Why don't I just kiss her and let the chocobo feathers hit the fan? But something kept telling him it wasn't the right time. Something assured him the trip was important. That they were both taking steps toward something that would make sense soon enough. He needed to be patient a little longer.
~@~
Somehow--Rydia still didn't know how--she got Edge to relax and start to laugh. She almost gave an audible sigh of relief when the panicked expression faded from his eyes and the tension melted from his body. She never saw him like that before. Of course, he'd never accidentally hurt her, either. Rydia had been hurt worse, close to death a couple of times, so the pain hadn't really been a problem. The feel of his hand holding hers, though, and the weird things it did to her insides had been all she'd focused on. I didn't mean to say 'ouch'.
Now, as they laughed and joked about the memories of their shared pasts, Rydia began to wonder if their relationship changed even more. It seemed obvious, but she didn't want to get her hopes up. Then again, what was life without hope? She smiled slightly, enjoying the feel of him beside her, especially when Edge touched her arm with a lingering stroke as he told her something he heard about someone they knew.
Over the past two weeks Rydia had hoped they were both changing. That they were both walking toward one another. Looking at each other in different ways. Looking at the future and seeing something different than what they'd seen just the month before. Now Rydia thought that maybe it was more than a hope. She didn't know how she knew. It was just something she felt. Maybe it was the way Edge looked at her. Maybe it was the way she looked at him. Maybe it was how they seemed to take more of an interest in the little things than they had before. Everything seemed to matter. Isn't love like that?
"This looks like a good place to set camp."
Edge's voice broke in on her mind like a gentle whisper of a cooling spring breeze. Goosebumps rose on her arms as she looked around them with eyes that seemed to view their surroundings for the first time. "You're right."
"You hungry?" Edge set their bedrolls down and looked around them. "I think I remember seeing some tracks leading off in that direction."
"You want me to go with you?" Rydia knew he'd say no.
He smiled. "Nah. You stay here and set up the fire. I'll be back in a few minutes with some dinner."
She nodded and sent Edge a smile. "Right. Be careful."
He grinned. "I'm always careful."
Edge turned and strode away, whistling some melody he'd heard somewhere. Rydia watched him go. Then she sighed and started gathering wood for the fire. So what hurdle am I going to climb over this evening? She had no idea. She'd kissed him--true, it had only been on the cheek, but it was better than nothing. She'd held his hand. She'd been honest about how she enjoyed his company and his friendship. The only thing left was . . . what? Again, she had no idea. She could only follow her instincts.
Rydia cleared her throat and made her way back to the campsite. She set up the stone circle and then the small pile of twigs and moss before casting a low-level Fire spell to ignite it. It smoked to life immediately. She coaxed it to a stronger flame by placing gradually larger pieces of wood on it as it blossomed. Once she believed it strong enough to take care of itself, she sat back and crossed her arms.
She blinked. Could she coax Edge the same way? She shivered and rubbed her arms, looking from the fire-pit toward the area she saw him last. Do I want to do that? Yes, she did. Yet, she didn't. After all, I don't know what to expect. I know what I want, but I'm scared of it at the same time. This was all so new and different from the friendship she'd grown comfortable with. Yet, it was the obvious step forward. One that, after all was said and done, she wanted to take.
Rydia cleared her throat again, startled and a little afraid of the feelings welling up within her young heart. They were strong, new, and more real than anything she'd known. She wanted to protect them. Stay true to them. She didn't want to betray them, just as she didn't want to betray Edge's friendship. Rydia brushed a stray hair from her face and stood to move just out of the firelight. No. That's one thing I won't do.
"Hey there, you. Where you going?"
Rydia smiled as Edge came into view. "Nowhere. Just walking around a bit. I've got a nice fire going."
"Looks like it." He gave her a wink, and his smile twinkled in his clear eyes. "Cheated, didn't you?"
"Of course. I don't rub sticks together." Rydia presented her hands. "I use what I have."
Edge chuckled as Rydia fell into step beside him. "I guess you've got a point. Don't blame you, anyway. It takes too long to do it the old-fashioned way."
"My point exactly." Rydia noticed an odd look cast her direction. Uh-oh. It isn't that obvious what I was thinking about, is it? She had to keep herself from giving a sigh of relief when he didn't say anything. "So, how many more days until Baron?"
"One or two, more than likely. Unless we catch a chocobo."
"Is there a chocobo forest around here?"
Edge gestured to the forest west of their position. "There. It's not exactly in our planned route, but if we caught one we'd make up the difference in no time."
Do I want to lose a day with him all to myself? "Oh."
Edge shot her a wink and smile. "I'm not too crazy about the idea myself."
She blinked at him. "What?"
"Catching a chocobo is hard work. Catching two? I don't know if it's worth the trouble. We've been making pretty good time, and it's been fun."
I couldn't have said it better myself. Rydia smiled. "It has, hasn't it? So, you don't mind if we just keep walking?"
"Nah. Good exercise. Oh yeah. Speaking of exercise." Edge flashed her an impish smile which shot a spark of something fantastic up her spine and to her toes. "I noticed a pond a little ways from here. I thought you m
ight like to take a swim while we wait for dinner to cook."
Rydia enthusiastically nodded as Edge worked on setting their dinner to cook just outside the flames. "That would be wonderful! I feel as if I have a second skin."
Edge laughed. "All right. Well give me a moment . . . all done. I'll take you over there now."
Rydia stood with an eager smile. Her eyes glowed. "Let's go."
He grabbed her hand. "Come on. It's this way."
They hurried through the high grass separating the well-traveled trail from the rest of the wilderness to enter a wooded grove. Birds cooed and called, greeting the duo with beautiful songs of welcome and happiness. Rydia took in the sights around her with a content smile as Edge gently pulled her along. After a while, they entered a small clearing with a center pond.
"Here it is."
"It's gorgeous," she exclaimed. Rydia rushed to the rim of the pond, slipping off her shoes to step in a little way. She shivered and cast a smile over her shoulder to Edge. Her eyes twinkled. "It's perfect." Rydia stepped back from the edge and began unfastening her dress. "This is going to feel so good."
"What are you doing?"
"I'm going in," she told him without turning. Rydia stripped down to her full-body slip, carefully set her dress and shoes where they wouldn't get wet, and then cast another glance to Edge. He stared at her, eyes wide and cheeks flushed. "What's the matter? Aren't you coming?"
"In a minute," he mumbled.
"Well, don't wait too long." She hurried into the water and sounded a shriek. "Brr! It's freezing."
Rydia dived under the glass-like surface of the water, enjoying the crisp feel of it against her skin. It was refreshing, waking every single part of her. It felt glorious! After a few moments of swimming as deep as she could, she bobbed to the surface to find Edge sitting at the rim of the pond watching her with a slight smile.
"You look like a mermaid."
"Don't they have scales?" Rydia asked, laughing. She pushed onto her back and floated around. "And a tail?"