“Good morning,” he said, heading over to warm the front of himself by the fire.
“Good morning. Are you frozen?”
“A little. Clara’s stovepipe fell apart.”
“That must have made a huge mess.”
“It did, but I was more concerned that she had heat.”
“Does she need to come here? Should I go get her?”
“No. She had almost everything cleaned up by the time I left.”
Jace turned then, the fire to his back, and glanced down at his clothes.
“I guess I’d better get changed. You won’t want this all over the house.”
Maddie was about to tell him it was all right, but he’d slipped into the small room behind the buttery to get rid of his dirty clothes. She didn’t want to be caught sitting at the table looking as lost as she felt. Suddenly feeling misplaced in her own house, Maddie made for the stairs, hoping she could find some of her needlework amid the trunks she’d packed in Boston.
Not for the first time, Jace thought he was being watched. He wasn’t actually working but had come out to putter with a drain that was sitting wrong and might break when a hard frost hit and all water turned to ice. He glanced up, looking first toward the barn and then to the windows of the house before deciding he was being imaginative.
The drain didn’t take anywhere near as long as he expected, and that was too bad. Jace wanted to stay free of the house for a while. Maddie was not herself today. She had been acting strangely since he’d come back from Clara’s. Every attempt during dinner to ask how she was was met with an uncertain face and an unconvincing answer.
Jace thought if this went on much longer, he would lose his temper. That was when he’d known it was time to head outside. But it was only getting colder, and try as he might, Jace didn’t want to spend his Sunday afternoon in the barn. Seeing no help for it, he gave up and went inside, seeing right away he shouldn’t have worried. Maddie was nowhere to be seen.
The whole day had passed. Maddie couldn’t believe how badly her plans had failed. She had spent almost the entire day tucked up in Jace’s old bedroom where she’d set up a large tapestry frame, trying to enjoy the scene she’d started before Doyle’s heart gave him trouble. Just that morning she had been so brave, ready to say whatever needed to be said, and now after a wasted day of watching her husband out the window, they were sitting down to tea.
Across from her, Jace watched the emotions chase across Maddie’s face. She had been acting oddly all day, but no amount of questioning had worked. She said nothing was wrong, but he didn’t believe it.
They’d been married almost two weeks. Jace wondered how long he was going to have to pay for the mistake he’d made in Boston. He didn’t want to start an argument, but he wanted an answer.
“How long are you going to be mad at me for mentioning a baby?” he asked when the meal was coming to an end.
Maddie looked at him, her face giving nothing away.
“I won’t say it again,” Jace promised. “I won’t even say it when your waist expands and your pains begin. I promise you, Maddie.”
His tone made Maddie laugh a little, but Jace only watched her.
“I’m not upset about that anymore.”
“But you are upset,” Jace stated.
“I don’t know how to explain it,” Maddie said, looking helpless, remembering things she had wanted to say for days. “What woman wants to miss all I’ve missed?”
“It won’t be the same,” Jace responded, his tone compassionate. “But I can tell you anything you want to know. I can give as much detail as you want. And I can even give you something to remember.”
Maddie frowned in confusion over this last statement until she read the warmth in Jace’s eyes. She would have left the table, all bravado deserting her, but he caught her hand.
“What are you afraid of, Maddie?”
“That!”
“What exactly? That you’ll be hurt? That you won’t know what to do?”
“Yes, all of that and more,” Maddie said, not looking at him, still trying to pull away. Jace would not allow it. He stood, still holding her hand captive, and came around the table to her chair. He moved it so that he could kneel in front of her, and then he did something Maddie did not expect.
“Okay, Maddie.” They were almost at eye level. “You touch me.”
“Touch you?” her voice rose a bit.
“Yes,” he took her hands and put them on his shoulders. “You touch me.”
For a long time Maddie didn’t move, but then she realized how firm the muscles were under his shirt. She rubbed his shoulders gently, liking the feel. But that didn’t last long. Maddie had always loved Jace’s hair, and soon her fingers reached for the locks that fell across his forehead.
“I’ve always loved the way this hair falls over your brow,” she told him softly, and Jace had all he could do to keep his hands to himself. “Your hair is soft.”
Jace smiled at her when Maddie looked into his eyes, and then she bent to kiss him.
“Don’t you want to touch me?” she asked shyly.
“Very much.”
“Why haven’t you?”
“I wanted you to want that.”
Maddie took his face in her hands now, so drawn to him and in love that she didn’t have words to explain her feelings.
“We might have to go slow,” she felt a need to say. Desire was crowding in, but the fear still lingered.
“We can do that,” Jace promised.
When Maddie bent again to kiss him, Jace felt free to wrap his arms tightly around her. He didn’t think anything had ever felt so wonderful.
For the first time Maddie woke up with Jace in the bed. Every other morning he was not to be seen, but this morning she was pressed against his back, an arm over his waist.
“Are you awake over there?” she heard him ask.
“I think so. Why are you facing that way?”
“The other hip hurt, so I had to move.”
Jace rolled to his back, Maddie scooting over to give him room. They lay on the pillows and smiled at each other.
“You’re usually up by now,” Maddie noted.
“I didn’t have a good reason to stay before,” he said, slipping an arm around her and pulling her close. Maddie lay her head on his chest, thinking the room would be very cold after having cuddled with Jace.
“I don’t suppose you want to get up and make us some coffee?” Jace asked.
“I was hoping you did,” Maddie replied. She smiled but then shifted to look at him. “Should we invite your sister to visit?”
“Why would we do that?”
“Well, she is family, and she did write to apologize.”
“Did you write back to her?”
“I haven’t because I want to be able to say that she’s welcome, but I’m afraid she’ll come between us again.”
“I don’t think that will happen, Maddie. She’s very different.”
“Do you think she’s all right? Is someone taking advantage of her?”
“It didn’t sound like it when we talked,” Jace said, but then realized he was not sure. “Go ahead and write. Tell her to come anytime.”
Maddie put her head back on his chest, her mind going without permission to her conversation with Mr. Muldoon. Maddie had not completely understood some of the things he said, but she could tell that he’d been sincere in his beliefs. For a time Maddie wondered if that’s what God was looking for: a sincere heart.
Before she could make up her mind, Jace kissed her and said he had to get moving. Maddie followed him out of bed, ready to start the day but not thrilled to dress in such a cold room.
Maddie wasn’t cold for long. Jace gave her a lingering kiss before going downstairs, one that kept her warm all the way to the kitchen.
“Well, Maddie,” Doyle said with surprised pleasure on Tuesday morning when she and Clara arrived in high spirits. “Doing some shopping?”
“As a matt
er of fact, we are here to look at wallpaper.”
“Well, now,” Doyle teased. “You must be trying to turn that old bachelor’s house into a home.”
“It’s needed it for years,” Clara wasn’t afraid to add.
Doyle grinned at her tone, and even though Maddie knew the way, he led the women to the shelf where rolls of wallpaper could be found. Clara had a recipe for paste, and they would buy some extra supplies to make that.
“Look at this blue,” Maddie exclaimed, pulling a roll down, wasting no time in her excitement.
“With little bits of green,” Clara added as she touched it. “That would look good in the spare room or Jace’s old room.”
“What about the parlor?”
“It’s not a huge room; you might want to pick something lighter.” Clara looked back to the shelf. “How about this one?”
“Oh,” Maddie touched the pale yellow stripe. “That’s perfect.”
“That tapestry you have started would be perfect on this. Maybe over the mantle.”
“Clara,” Maddie looked at her in amazement, and not for the first time, “you have an eye for this. You would do very well in Boston.”
“Oh, go on,” she said, waving her away, but Maddie was serious.
“Have you wallpapered your own house?”
Clara grinned. “Every room.”
Maddie’s mouth opened. “And why haven’t I been invited down to see it?”
“Consider yourself invited. Anytime you wish.”
Maddie knew she would take her up on that before the week was out. Acting like little girls on an outing, they ended up choosing wallpaper for four rooms. The only room they skipped was Jace and Maddie’s bedroom. Maddie told Clara she liked it the way it was, which was true, but the main reason she held off was she wanted Jace’s opinion about the print.
Maddie was still growing used to the idea of having a husband she didn’t keep at arm’s length. It was a wonderful new experience, but one she didn’t feel she deserved. At any moment she feared it would all be taken from her. Superstitious as it might seem, changing the bedroom when things where going so well felt like courting disaster.
“What’s the matter?” Clara asked, watching the emotions chase across the younger woman’s face.
“Nothing. Just thinking about wallpaper.”
“Don’t worry,” Clara said, misreading the true reason. “I’ll help you put it up.”
They didn’t leave town without stopping to greet Cathy, but she wouldn’t let them stay for more that a quick cup of tea. She said snow was coming, and they had to get home.
And she was right. They weren’t even out of town when the first flakes began to fall.
Jace stepped out of the mill when he noticed the snowflakes. There was nothing heavy or threatening about the sky, but he wished that Maddie and Clara had already come past. He didn’t have much more to do—things were ready for the next cutting season—but he was hesitant to leave before knowing they were on their way home.
Then another thought struck him. What if they’d gone by and he hadn’t noticed? Trying to decide where he wanted to be, Jace paced around a bit and then gave up. He closed things down at the mill and started for home. He knew that all he would do was worry, but he decided to do that where a wagon or sleigh was readily available.
Just seeing his face, Clara knew that Jace had worried about them, but she’d not said a word. Maddie didn’t seem to notice anything more than the fact that he came from the kitchen the moment they pulled into the yard.
“It’s snowing!” Maddie called to him.
“I’m sure Clara is thrilled,” Jace teased to cover the relief he felt. He hadn’t foreseen this. Having a wife, someone to share his life with, had been the goal. But she hadn’t come with any instructions. He didn’t know when she would cry or get upset with him, and he certainly hadn’t banked on his own feelings when she might be in trouble. He’d done nothing but pace and worry until he spotted them up the road. He’d gone to the kitchen to calm down some but also in an effort not to give himself away. Meeting them at the barn was his normal routine. If he’d gone out the front door, they would have known he was worried.
As it was, he suspected Clara was on to him, but she said nothing, scooting inside only to get out of the snow. And she didn’t stay long. It was coming down hard now, and she wanted to get home. Jace sent her on her way with instructions not to come in the morning if the weather was at all unpredictable. Clara waved and went on her way, leaving Maddie alone with her husband.
“How did you do?” Jace asked, having brought in the packages.
“We found wallpaper for four rooms.”
“Four? I thought you were doing one.”
“You don’t want me to do four?”
“Four is fine; I just didn’t realize.”
Maddie looked uncertain. “Maybe four is too many.”
“Madalyn, it’s fine,” Jace said, wanting her to listen to him, his tone growing firm.
“Are you angry?”
Jace stared at her, asking himself what went on in town that would make her so uncertain over this. He didn’t understand that she struggled with feelings of uncertainty all too often.
“I’m not angry,” Jace told her, smiling to reinforce the point. “Not at all. Why don’t you show me what you bought?”
Maddie did this, watching her husband’s face for signs of upset, but he liked everything they had selected. He even won Maddie’s heart again when he asked about their bedroom.
“Well,” she explained, “I thought you might want to have some say.”
“That was sweet of you,” he said, bending to kiss the end of her nose. “You’re still cold,” he said sweetly. “Come over by the fire.”
Wrapped in her husband’s embrace in front of the fire, Maddie told herself she had been silly. It wasn’t too good to be true. Jace really was hers. She still didn’t think she deserved him, but for now, she ordered her fears to stop plaguing her.
A letter had come thanking Maddie for the invitation but also saying that Eden would not be visiting until December, weather permitting. Maddie had written back to say they would be there no matter when Eden arrived and then not given it any more thought. So when Eden trudged up the snow-covered road on a sunny day in the middle of December, she was the last person on Maddie’s mind.
Clara had not come that day. She’d begun to take Tuesdays and Fridays as days at home. So when the knock sounded at the door, Maddie had no choice but to answer it herself. She swiftly wiped her hands, knowing whoever was outside had to be cold.
“Eden,” Maddie exclaimed, feeling her heart lurch.
“Hello, Maddie,” she said quietly. “Is this a bad time?”
“No, come in out of the cold. I was just doing some baking.”
“Is there something I can do to help?”
“Come and get warm, Eden,” Maddie offered, trying to work out who this really was. She hadn’t had more than a few hours with Eden in the past, but the memory was a strong one. This looked like Eden, but nothing else was the same. There was a softness to her eyes and a gentleness to her speech and mannerisms that Maddie didn’t recognize.
“Sit here by the fire. I’ll make you a cup of tea,” Maddie offered, and Eden glanced around.
“Everything looks wonderful.”
“Thank you.”
“You’ve done some wallpapering,” Eden said, glancing back into the parlor they’d just walked through. “Oh, and in the small room too. Does your uncle carry those prints?”
“Yes, he has a good selection.”
“Thank you.” Eden smiled when Maddie set the tea in front of her. Maddie took a seat with her own tea, wondering what they would talk about.
“How is Jace?” Eden asked.
“Oh, Eden,” Maddie said as she rose. “He’s in the barn. I’ll tell him you’re here.”
“It’s all right if he’s busy.”
“Not at all. I’ll just run and get him.?
??
Maddie’s brain raced all the way to the barn, so befuddled by Eden’s presence she almost tripped on the threshold.
“Maddie?” Jace was suddenly behind her; she had walked right past him.
“Oh, there you are.”
“What’s the matter?”
“Eden’s here.”
“What did she say?”
“Nothing—it’s not like that. She’s just so changed.”
Jace’s racing heart slowed. For a moment he thought they had gone backward in time, a place he did not wish to be.
“Are you all right?”
“Yes, I just needed you to know she was here.”
“I’ll be right in.”
“Don’t hurry. We’re just talking in the kitchen.”
Jace watched her leave, understanding her plight. The Eden he’d talked to that weekend and then on the train was not the woman he’d known for 25 years. Maddie’s only interaction with Eden had been completely negative. He could understand that she would be very confused.
Jace hurried to put away his tools. He was anxious to see his sister, and not because he couldn’t trust her. He found the change in her utterly fascinating.
“I’ve never asked about the folks in the boardinghouse,” Maddie mentioned over tea that Saturday night. The three of them had done a lot of talking, but this hadn’t come up. “Have the same people been there for long?”
Both Jace and Eden laughed.
“What did I miss?” Maddie questioned.
“It’s terrible of us,” Eden admitted, “but I have one gentleman who looked to be 80 when he moved in, but he’s been with me for over 15 years. I still have no idea how old he is.”
“Is he ailing at all?” Jace wished to know.
“Not in the least. He’s as strong as ever. May, she helps me in the kitchen,” Eden explained to Maddie. “She determined to learn his age a few years ago, but no amount of probing or questions would do it.”