‘Cause a state appointed attorney don’t’ give a fuck if you rot in jail for the rest of your life,
They ain’t gon defend you too tough - you don’t control their salary - they ain’t puttin’ up no real fight
So if you haven’t started yet - start stashin’ your money up in the shoebox tonight!!!
POETIC INSPIRATION
This piece was inspired by an individual I heard say “I won’t get knocked, I don’t have the look”. I was astonished to hear someone even think like that… at that moment I was thinking “you’re black… you already have the look.” Some hustle for material gain while others hustle just to survive. Whatever your reason or excuse, make sure you save should the day ever arise that you get arrested. Yeah, you’re entitled to a free defense attorney however what you don’t pay usually ends up costing you your freedom. Do I condone selling drugs? No, however I know and understand the circumstances and situations which can lead up to that decision. Politicians/the government are more concerned with treating the symptoms while neglecting the root cause. What does that mean? It means that politicians and the government will put more police on patrol instead of creating facilities and opportunities that can assist and uplift the people. There are not enough positive and uplifting things for the youth to do, so what happens? They roam the streets with no destination which leads to mischievous behavior and sometimes illegal acts. Even with that being said we must not always seek the government to help us succeed. We must take the initiative as individuals to create better conditions for our people.
WHY YOU LEAVE?
I miss you so
Why’d you leave me? Why’d you go?
Was it something I did or said?
Didn’t cook well enough? Wasn’t good enough in bed?
If there was a problem, all you had to do was open your mouth
You didn’t have to pack up your things and re-locate Down South
That shit astonished me
Bullshit ass note along side my house keys
We’ve experienced so much. You’ve become my best friend
You couldn’t express how you felt? Couldn’t tell me this was the end?
It had to end on a piece of paper?
I had to read the words “I can’t stay” you knew I was on my way - Couldn’t wait ‘till I got home just a few minutes later?
Bitched up?
Didn’t wanna look me in my face? Didn’t wanna start chokin’ up?
Yeah well - alls well and fine
You do your thing - have no choice but to do mine
Just something I’ll have to accept
Though coming from you, it wasn’t something I’d ever expect
But life ain’t about what you expect
Rarely the things you most want in your life do you ever tend to get
Had you for a minute
Guess my fun is up now, time for the next chick to get and be wit’ it
You have nothin’ but my best wishes
It’s her turn to get all your fondles while she’s trying to cook, talk on the phone, get ready for work or wash the dishes
Although extremely saddened, I can’t be mad
She may have you now but I’ve already had
And before me was the other chick
I knew before I got involved with you - you was famous for the switch
Shouldn’t have opened my heart so wide
Now I feel like you slammed the door in my face - left me standing in the cold outside
HOW COULD YOU DO THIS TO ME?
BABY I HAD TO
Baby I had to leave, it wasn’t you - it was all me
You know I been in a lot of dangerous circles since I been flippin’ these keys
Please don’t ever question or doubt my love for you
I hope you’re not beating yourself up thinking it was something you did or did not do
Because baby you’re perfect, I thought women like you no longer existed
The first week with you I was glad as fuck I was persistent - dropped all them other broads - stopped all that dumb shit
Why? Because we actually conversed
Never once questioned my doe schemin’ on how to get it in your purse
Baby you are my treasure - my grand prize
I melt like a hot fudge sundae with one look in them sexy ass eyes
We both know I used to be a playa, the one on the go
You know money attracts the most grimy and freakiest hoes
Then I met you… paid me absolutely no mind
A nigga had to smile, bag you and make your fine ass mine
That alone showed me how different you are
Ain’t give two fucks about my jewels, doe, customized car or how much doe I dropped for my mans at the bar
And although you stay dipped, you’re far from materialistic
Always encouraged me to go legit because you ain’t wanna see your man dead or locked up doin’ no bid
And as much as I hope you are, I hope you’re not pregnant
I don’t need my child growing up without me feeling all fucked up and neglected
Because to be honest baby, I may never return, you may never see me again… you may never hear my voice
Had to body that nigga - He thought I was pussy - Thought I was a nigga he could burn. I know I did - but it felt like I ain’t had no choice
It’s not safe in these streets, so just in case I left you a piece
Keep it off safety. If a nigga ever approach you aim high, aim right, breathe and release
And I’m mad as fuck right now ‘cause you told me not to get involved wit’ this dumb shit
You told me that nigga was a snake and couldn’t be trusted
I thought my experience outweighed your intuition
Now I’m sittin’ here with the woulda, coulda, shoulda’s… but didn’t.
I’M SORRY BABY. I LOVE YOU
BROKEN HEART DAME
I saw you today
On the Ave. wit’ a bitch wearin’ black and gray
Following you? Not even
Don’t try to put this on me because you got caught wit’ the heathen
I had to go handle some business for work
Hopped out the car and boy did I feel like the jerk
Was going to approach you - but for what? What’s that going do?
Prove that you’re eating me and that bitch too
Fuck it. It’s a feeling - I’ll get over it
Forgot about work - Came right home and took the liberty of packin’ up all your shit
Couldn’t believe what I had seen
Felt like a movie - like I was in a dream
You ain’t never do shit for me
I gave you everything. A crib with live in pussy
I bought you that shit on your back
I’m the one who supplied you wit’ the money to re-up for them cracks
You don’t give a fuck about me
Out there banging these others chicks but callin’ me wifee
Look how long we’ve been together
I never thought this fucked up shit you’d ever endeavor
But hey - that’s the breaks
Thought I wouldn’t find out? I ain’t stupid. I knew why you were coming in late
“Boo I had to handle some business wit’ Julio uptown at the studio”
Do I look like a dick? Is asshole written on my forehead yo?
You and your mans go fuck ‘till your dicks fall
I know how ya’ll do. All for one. One for all
Ya’ll a buncha nasty muh-fuckas
Look at your feet - I bought you them chuckas
And you go profile around your friends like you livin’ large
When that shit is on my account - I used my charge card
That’s what I get for being so blind
Even your mother told me I’m waisting my time - a better man she knew
I could find
Always said “he is a no good man
Betta play like the gingerbread man and run run as fast as you can”
Dumb bitch to myself is all I can say
You can’t rest here no longer - You gotta boat today
I don’t know why the fuck I stopped poppin’ my pills
‘Cause you don’t never like wearin’ nothin on that dills
“Look at all the times we’ve share”?
Ahhh! Stop with the stories my hearings impaired
I’ma be by myself for awhile
Forget a marriage. Forget a nigga. Forget a child
A new man will definitely be found
But it ain’t gon last anyway. The next relationship’s gon be rebound
All the things I did
The only thing I didn’t do was have your fuckin’ kid
Tried to trap me
Fuck you our relationship wasn’t all that happy
Oh and I’m pregnant right this minute
Not for long though. You fucked up. I’m headed for the clinic
POETIC REFLECTION
Damn, the clinic? She ain’t have to do that! Don’t kill your baby because your “heart” (mind/emotions) were wounded. But that is one of many ways a Broken Heart Dame will seek gratification and revenge from feeling violated, especially if she’s gone the distance in the relationship. If ya’ll made an agreement that it’s going to be a you and I, me and you thing be disciplined enough to resist the enticement. 85% of the population reveal their body wearing something tight, short and/or see through. So if you’re not mentally strong enough to back off of a big butt or big breasted woman, don’t commit to anyone. But if you do… be prepared to deal with all consequences that will transpire, because it’s 100% worse when feelings are involved. Crimes of passion ain’t no joke!
And most of all you could be losing your best friend. Appreciate what you have while you still have it. And for those who have lost someone of great worth and value I hope you have learned from the lesson.
WHAT NEXT
It’s over - I got him
Was her favorite phrase when she went out club hoppin’
* * * *
She went to the club and met a cutie last week
But a fight broke out, got separated before they exchanged contact info so at a more convenient time they could speak
She was determined to get this guys number
Fantasizing about rolling around with him passionately into a deep slumber
It’s been a whole week but off she go to the club like what
Doubting he’ll be there, but testing her luck
Up in the club you’d think she was a talent scout
Or F.B.I. looking for a Black Man strong enough to stand up and speak out
Turned around and lo’ and behold
Duke from last week lookin’ even better and more swole
Quick surprise
Followed by a big smile and seductively slanted bedroom eyes
Followed by a hand hold and “what up boo,
Thought about you all week - Kinda thrown back though - didn’t think you’d come through”
Followed by a tilted and seemingly bashful smile
Because she don’t wanna seem so fast - but she thought about him too - graphic images type wild
They sittin’, conversin’, sippin’ on somethin’
They sizin’ each other up - nothin’ but hee-hee, ha-ha’s and much flirtin’
He thinkin’ “damn shortie is fine
Should I one night stand her or try to make her mine?”
She’s thinkin’ “damn he is gorgeous. Look at those eyes and his teeth are beautiful
That’s baby father material right there. I’m fertile - we could be fruitful”.
They end up leavin’ the club together- so what should the next scene be?
Them usin’ protection or contracting a sexually transmitted disease?
CAUGHT
Bitch I done caught you
Fuck out my crib - gimme back all the shit I done bought you
I love you to death but our times are now antiquated
You know - ancient, old, behind the times, two tone pants out dated
Bitch don’t badger me - no you can’t stay
I ain’t fuck up - you made it this way
Thought I wasn’t gon see you?
Surprise for that ass bitch - Here I am - Peak a boo
I don’t even wanna know how long it’s been goin’ on
‘Cause wit’ you seein’ someone else, your feelings for me can’t be too strong
Ahhh - what you mean you don’t care about him?
Shut the fuck up - you lettin’ that nigga bend up your limbs
I can’t believe this shit
Fuckin’ me - suckin’ that nigga dick
My respect for you is kinda gone
How I’m feelin’ now can’t be expressed in words - it’s way beyond.
Shit hurts too bad - You know the type of nigga I am - I can’t let this go
What your friends say about the situation? Probably hooked you up wit’ that nigga. Buncha mangy ass hoes.
Just go now - Just leave
I bought it - but you can go wit’ the clothes on your back - But on the table put your jewels and my keys
Don’t explain now - totally unnecessary
You ain’t got no place to stay? When you was wit’ that nigga you wasn’t worried
Call that nigga, maybe he’ll shack you up
Oh, he got a wife. Fucked up baby girl - Tough luck
Go back to your moms crib
Tell her how you fucked up - tell her the foul shit you did
I was the best thing you ever had
Moms lovin’ me too – she’s going to be disgusted - I know she gon be mad
I go through on the humble - even without you
“I was in the neighborhood Ma and I figured it’s about your lunch time. So here - I bought some grub for you”
Her face always lights up like the sun in the sky
You was fucked up to your moms - If she don’t take you back it’s your fault don’t ask her why
Your pops is cool too
We always chill. Talk, sit on the porch smokin’ joints, drinkin’ brew
You was my girl… It was only right to look after them like family
Fuck all that cryin’ shit - come on now, please spare me
I know I won’t ever be able to turn my back completely on you
But we ain’t fresh no more. We ain’t wrapped tight like aluminum foil
Remember, you’re the one who fucked up all the time we put into this
But before you go Boo - just gimme one last hug - one last kiss
POETIC THOUGHT
Would you be able to exhibit such restraint if a situation like this happened to you?
YOU CAUGHT ME
Boo, it just happened. I ain’t mean it
You know how it is when two people alone and start drinkin’
It was in the heat of the moment. It happened so fast
Please don’t think I intended to give him some ass
Lust was the factor. That played the major part
Please don’t think I deliberately tried to crush your heart
I never took for granted all the things you’ve done for me
I know if we wasn’t together you wouldn’t have like three, four “pharmacies”
But you know I like the finer things
Fat ass cars, outstanding wardrobe, bangin’ shoes, diamond rings
You put me up when family shitted on me
Said “Fuck ‘em Boo, I’m here for you, look made you a set of house keys”
Remember the time we almost had a kid?
Unfortunate circumstances though, five months early out my body the baby slid
The bond you have with my family is marvelous
You the only nigga I fucked
wit’ who I knew I could trust
But as you said, this does lie upon my shoulders
Guess I got a little more growing up to do - just knew I was older
I still love you to death
So many nights I couldn’t sleep ‘till you came home so I could lay on your chest
I can’t see how you givin’ up on us so easily
Too many times I’ve been there for you and you there for me
You caught me. What the fuck can I do? I can’t lie
Probably go to my moms house, sit in the corner all day, sob ‘till I can’t open my eyes
Fuck am I gon tell ma duke
Forgot to tell you, she called the other day told me to tell you thank you for all that you’ve done and she loves you
You did too much for me spoiling me the way you did
Gave me more than what I wanted because you already supplied me with what I needed
You didn’t even want me working, or doing nothing too hard
Only thing you wanted when you got home was a hot meal and nice massage
What I do? Comply
You my man, I love doin’ shit for you - I can’t lie
But now granting your wishes - I gotta go
And if there’s ever a chance for us again - call and just say so
Believe me, I’ll be waiting
I don’t care how long it takes - I’ll cut off any nigga that I’m dating