Read Over the Hills and Far Away Page 18


  ~Nursery Rhyme~

  Wisdom’s Children

  The first had eyes doleful as any hound, equally bloodshot with drooping lids. The second wore a look gloomy as death, one could not gaze upon his countenance without declaring, “this then is the meaning of lugubrious! Whenever they get around to writing dictionaries, his likeness shall ever be linked with that horrid word.” The third never said anything but peered down his long nose like a crow staring down from a dead tree, too great and wondrous to notice the goings on of the lesser beings about him, save perhaps with a sneer. They were academics; they were professors; they were brilliant; they were going to sea. The University of Gotham had grown rather small for these men of towering intellect, the confined one story space was so cramped with students and lesser professors that there was hardly room to stand, let alone sit or maintain the requisite personal space necessary to such men of lofty mien, but they would not be driven from their nest like terrified fledglings reluctant to fly. No! Rather they were setting themselves an academic challenge to which they must rise and would shine forth like the sun in its glory. They would go to sea! The things they would learn, the space they would have! They were dizzy with the sheer wonder of such heady thoughts.

  As they were such brilliant men, never did they think to ask, ‘how does one go to sea?’ Never did they talk with sailors or fishermen or shipbuilders, such common folk could know nothing of the intricacies of an ocean voyage. Neither did they know of any esteemed Doctor in the nautical arts, they might have deigned to speak with such a colleague, but to their expansive knowledge none such existed in the known world. Perhaps they might have read a book upon the subject, but as there was no esteemed Doctor to write such a tome, there was certainly none in existence they would stoop to reading. Instead, they peered at the sea, talked amongst themselves, and theorized, which must be far the wiser course of action, for men of learning must know something even about things of which they know nothing, for an expert in one field is undoubtedly an expert in all.

  So it was for a year and a day they talked and thought and argued about the best means by which to go to sea. The results were rather splendid, even more so because the project was fully financed by the King, who acted as benefactor to this astounding project for unspoken reasons of his own. They stood upon the quay, resplendent in their nautical garb (of their own design as well) of brilliant purple, silver, and cloth of gold; their hats alone were works of such art that many a lady pined over their beauty to her thrice great-grandchildren. Beside them floated their craft, a perfectly spherical bowl, painted and gilded to match their own brilliant garments. The usual inhabitants of the dockyards stood off to one side in their peasant drabbery, their faces unreadable and silent at this interruption in their routine but a hostile fog floated unseen around the intruders and their gaudy craft and clothes alike. The entire populous of the University turned out to wish the voyageurs a fond farewell, the students gawking like peasant children upon their first sight of a distant castle and the lesser professors envious behind their painted smiles. The ceremony was long, tedious, and full of words too long to bother repeating, but at last all was settled in an appropriately glorious fashion and the adventurers boarded their craft which summarily capsized with their ill-distributed weight, plunging the three into the murky depths below.

  The peasant rabble did not bother to hide their mirth at seeing these all too high and mighty persons brought down by their own folly while the envious lesser professors wondered if they might not find themselves elevated should their esteemed peers accidentally drown. The students continued to gape in silence, not realizing that this was not part of ‘The Plan,’ as it would never occur to their finely cultivated minds to think that such esteemed personages could ever make a mistake, no matter how minor. So it was that no one rushed to the aid of the beleaguered seamen, but rather stood about lost in their own contemplations of the circumstances. But thankfully, our lofty professors were not without their resources. They had never bothered to learn to swim, but such a basic skill that could be mastered by the dullest of peasant children must come naturally to men of their persuasion. But there was also the perplexing matter of one’s pride, would it not be better to drown rather than face the mirth of their peers, and worse, the peasantry in what should have been their finest hour? What about the state of one’s clothes! One could not emerge from the sea dripping and soggy, like a cat caught in a downpour; it would never do!

  So they thought to themselves as the waters closed in around them and no hand came to draw them from the engulfing sea. Had a hand reached out in help, they would have slapped it away in pride, for none of their esteemed colleagues was esteemed enough to offer rescue! The lugubrious fellow began to theorize on the art of swimming and had just come to the point of trying a few bold strokes himself when he was quite overwhelmed by the surrounding wetness and lost to all theorization thereafter. The man with the hound’s face thought to make a study of the intricacies of the submerged world in lieu of his sea voyage, forgetting for a moment that he was not a natural denizen thereof, until he became a permanent resident. The sneering academic sat upon the bottom and snarled at the jaunty outline of their fabulous craft bobbing merrily above, a mere shadow amid the hazy light of the water’s surface, daring anyone to come to his aid, daring the water itself to do its worst. Whether the water heeded him or not, none can guess, for he has yet to emerge and give an account of the matter and the sea will only murmur to itself in a language outside of mortal ken.

  The students went back to their studies, eagerly awaiting the day when the esteemed professors would return from their in-depth study of the ocean depths while their colleagues began plotting how best to use this tragedy for their own advancement. The bowl floated in cheery indifference next to the quay and the peasants went back to their livelihoods, a knowing smile upon their less than enlightened faces. The three apparently continue their studies to this day, their lecture no doubt will be quite enlightening upon their return, but for some reason the fishermen of that little village believe quite the contrary, shaking their heads and grinning knowingly whenever the subject is broached. But then what do such uneducated and silly folk know of such matters?

  Something told the wild geese

  It was time to fly,

  Summer sun was on their wings,

  Winter in their cry.