CHAPTER 7
Integration
Princess Etheria leaned forward in the stone seat that her father had just formed out of thin air on the flat top of Conjuring House Rock, and stared intently at the Thunderhouse waterfalls, trying to make some sense of what she was seeing. She tilted her head to one side and then to the other, like a puppy trying to figure out the source of a strange sound.
The simple truth was that she wasn’t sure if she could believe what she was seeing. She closed her eyes, rubbed them with her fists (although she didn’t exactly know why she did this; it just seemed like the kind of thing that one would do in this type of situation), and then opened them again.
There was no mistake. She wasn’t seeing things: where earlier, there had been three individual waterfalls, there was now only one.
She knew intuitively that, from this angle, on the top of Conjuring House Rock and looking slightly down and away, she could see all three waterfalls in alignment. Although she sensed that it was some kind of optical illusion, she couldn’t at first differentiate one waterfall from another. As far as she could tell, they had become a single gigantic entity.
After some time and effort, she began to be able to recognize elements from each of the individual waterfalls. She could see the wide lip of the Head overlapping that of the Heart so that the latter’s upright rocks seemed to be floating in the middle of a wall of water, and giving the illusion that they were steadily swimming upstream against the current. She could also see that the narrow chute of the Throat was now nestled directly above the other two, so that it looked as if it were pouring its water in between them.
The canyon walls of the river framed the whole thing so that you couldn’t see the river immediately above or below the amalgamated waterfall. As a result, you couldn’t see where the water was coming from, or even where it was going. This trick created another illusion that she was just now picking up on: it seemed like the water was spiralling around the combined waterfalls, and re-circulating back up through the Throat, only to tumble down again.
She settled back into her seat and stared in wonder at the illusion. While looking at it, she had begun to feel very giddy, and her body felt suddenly light. It wasn’t the same kind of lightness that she felt when she was a bird, this was different. It was like her whole body was slowly being filled with helium, and she could feel the lightness seeping out into her arms and legs to fill her toes and fingers. It was as if she had just heard a very funny joke, and her laugh had caught in her throat and, instead of leaving her body, it was spreading warmly throughout it.
Slowly Etheria lifted her hand up in front of her face, and saw that her fingers seemed to be encompassed by a soft golden glow, and that a subtle energy seemed to be crackling between her fingers. The little hairs on the back of her hand and arm were standing straight up, and the skin all over her body seemed to be tingling.
After a few minutes, she became accustomed to the tickling energy, which eventually settled into a comfortable feeling of elation.
From somewhere off in the distance, she could hear her father’s voice.
“You were right Etheria, it’s important to strive for a balance between the qualities usually associated with the head, and those linked with the heart. What you’re feeling now is the energy that you feel when the two merge.”
A string of vibrations shot up her spine, causing her whole body to shake. She squeezed her eyes shut, and enjoyed this ecstatic sensation. She’d felt this kind of thing before, a few times. Sometimes she had experienced it when she was listening to a particularly powerful piece of music, or when she was moved by a touching story. It was pure joy bubbling up through her body, and tickling her as it went.
Her father’s voice continued. “This combined waterfall is symbolic of the integration of the head and the heart. Its message is to strive for a balance between the two.”
Etheria crinkled her eyebrows at this.
“I realize that the head and the heart have historically been able to work together, at least peripherally,” said Rowan in response. “The head is instrumental in analyzing a problem, and the heart is key in offering up creative solutions in response. I’m talking about a much deeper and meaningful integration though.”
“Let me give you an example,” he continued. “If, in your life, you have a lot of creativity but no discipline, then chances are you’re coming up with so many ideas so quickly, that you can’t express even one of them before the next one takes its place. You could spend an entire week staring at a blank canvas and never decide what to paint. Or not be able to stop with just the canvas, and paint the entire wall behind it at the expense of sleep and food. Conversely, too much logic, and many of your ideas will get dismissed as being too outlandish, and you’re back staring at a blank canvas. “
Etheria smiled as she listened to the King speak. Wasn’t that what had happened to her earlier? When she was unable to see the outline of a human form from the top of the tree? At the time, she had actually considered the right answer, but her logical mind had thought it ridiculous, and refused to pursue it. She could think of many times in the past when she had done something similar.
“Too much logic,” continued Rowan, “and you can’t—to use a cliché—‘think outside the box’. But too much creativity on the other hand, and that’s all you can do, and you will forget how to do the things that you need to do in order to survive.”
Etheria opened her eyes, and marvelled at the energy coursing through her, and how powerful it made her feel. It was the feeling that anything was possible, that there were no limitations, ever.
The King had stopped speaking, and they both continued to watch the water circle and then tumble through the three Thunderhouse waterfalls. The three waterfalls in balance; the three waterfalls that had become one.
Just a moment, she thought to herself. There are three waterfalls. Once again, her father seemed to have forgotten one.
“You still haven’t told me about the Throat,” she said. “In fact you’ve hardly mentioned it since you first pointed it out. What’s the deal?”
The King smiled broadly. “I’m saving the best for last,” he said warmly and as if it was an obvious point. “Where each of the energies that these concepts represent is equally important, the equilibrium that you achieve through a balance of the head and the heart would mean little if there was no way to actually execute the result.”
“Ahhh,” Etheria said expectantly.
“I think you’re getting it.” There was laughter in the King’s voice. “Go on,” he encouraged her, “tell me what you’re thinking.”
Etheria leaned forward in the seat, excited by the new ideas that had gripped her. “The Throat is a way of speaking, and, um, creating. You use words to bring your ideas to life.”
She paused for a moment searching for a particular word that was eluding her. The King waited patiently. All at once it seemed to come to her.
“Manifest. That’s it! You manifest something by speaking it into existence. You told me that when you were teaching me to use magic. Before I learned how to create magic using just my thoughts.”
“I couldn’t have said it better myself Etheria!” Rowan said proudly. “Well done indeed. Some religions say that God created the Universe by speaking it into existence. God used words, and they were good words. This is exactly what you’re doing when you execute an idea that was formed through the marriage of the head and the heart, you use your throat to manifest it.”
He mimicked something coming out of his mouth and spreading out into the canyon beyond.
“Balance is still important though, even though there are three components here, the relationship still has to be equal. It’s kind of like the Heart comes up with the ideas, the Head drafts up the plans, and the Throat builds it all. The Heart wouldn’t be able to manifest its ideas alone, the Head would have nothing to draft into plans, and the Throat wouldn’t know what to construct without proper guidance. When all three of these a
spects work together—when they are fully integrated—the music that comes out of the throat is a thing of beauty. It is proud, it is magical, and it is anything but shy.”
Etheria smiled thinking about proud, magical music, and it was as if she could hear some of it faintly on the wind.
“So now you know the secret,” said the King to Etheria. “You know how to unlock the power of integration. I can remember what it felt like the first time I felt the energy that you’re feeling now. It was like I was the most powerful person on the planet. I felt like I could do anything, which, in Thenken, is saying a lot.”
He paused for a moment to face Etheria and then continued. “Imagine my surprise, when I found out that I hadn’t even begun to grasp the true power of this place.”
Etheria looked over at her father in shock. What could possibly be more powerful than this? she asked without opening her mouth. Her father seemed to be able to understand the unspoken question. He moved in closer, and whispered conspiratorially in her ear, “You don’t have to come here to feel the power. Once you know the secret, you can tap into it anywhere, anytime.”
He stood back smiling openly.
The Princess looked back at the integrated falls and realized that what her father said was the truth. The true power here was the knowledge that came from this experience. As she reflected on this, she had a crazy thought, one that she didn’t immediately dismiss, and instead expressed in its entirety. Isn’t knowledge where all real power comes from?
The sun moved noticeably across the sky as they stared together quietly, enjoying the tingling sensation and the rush of energy that washed over them.
Finally Rowan broke the silence.
“There’s another reason why this place is important.” He paused, swallowed hard and took a deep breath.
“This is also where your mother first entered the forest.”
Etheria looked immediately at her father, and although the buzzing sensation diminished slightly at the mention of her mother, it began to swell again as she started to think fondly of her.
“How much do you remember about your mother?”
It was a difficult question for the Princess. “Bits and pieces,” she answered immediately, even though instinctively she knew that there was more to it. She had some clear memories, and some fuzzy ones too. Oddly, it was the fuzzy ones that felt like they were more recent. Shouldn’t it be the other way around?
As she stared at the falls in thought, she realized that the warm buzzing energy was helping her memory, and the fuzzier memories were slowly getting clearer. With a start, she realized what they were.
They weren’t memories at all.
“I’ve been dreaming about her,” she announced excitedly. “A lot actually. And recently too.”
Her father raised his right eyebrow in thought, and continued to smile.
“Yes, that would makes sense,” he said to her directly, and then, more quietly and almost to himself, he continued, “they would seem like dreams.”
She looked at him quizzically, and was about to question this last comment when he gently cut her off by continuing to speak.
“You need to know the truth about where she went.” His tone was very blunt, but Etheria knew that it is all an act. There was an underlying emotion in her father’s voice, betraying how difficult this was for him. Indeed, how difficult it was for both of them.
They had discussed the matter a few times, and Etheria knew that her mother had left them both when she was very young—still very much a baby. Her father was never one to avoid a topic, and although he rarely brought up the subject himself, he never side-stepped questions. And he was always keen to tell Etheria about some kind of adventure that he had once shared with her mother, or reflect on one that Etheria had been around for too.
But this topic, of where her mother had gone, was new. Etheria thought hard, and couldn’t recall why she had never asked such an obvious question, or why her father had never provided such an important detail. Without realizing that she was thinking in an integrated manner, she analyzed a few possibilities. Perhaps her father had avoided the question? Perhaps he had lied?
But then, an option occurred to her that made a certain kind of sense. She could hear a little voice talking directly to her that said You never asked, because you didn’t have to. You already knew the answer.
Etheria struggled with this revelation, and honestly considered it even though she couldn’t see how it was possible to know something when she couldn’t understand what it was she knew. Her thinking was interrupted by her father, who was trying to speak, but appeared to be, uncharacteristically, at a loss for words.
“Thenken is a magical place,” he started, and then paused. “It is full of magical things. Of magical beings…And if you can’t…If you don’t…”
He stopped to think, and couldn’t find any more words.
Etheria thought she could see where he was trying to go with it, so she tried to help him out by asking, “Did Mom stop believing in magic?”
The King appeared grateful for the assistance, and was finally able to continue, “It’s not so much that she stopped believing in magic, but you’re on the right track.”
Rowan took a step forward, and then assumed a sitting position by crossing his legs. But he didn’t sit down on the plateau to do it, he simply pulled one leg up at a time, and when he was done, he was floating in mid-air in front of Etheria, but off to the side so that she could still see the waterfalls.
“Each of us believes in magic,” he continued, “at least to some degree. Even in the waking world, we do magic everyday, even if most of us don’t realize that we’re doing it.”
As he spoke, the King used the tip of his finger to spell a word in the air between them in a manner similar to how he had created the Royal Seal in the resteddy that time they were discussing the importance of helping others. The letters stood several inches tall, and looked like flaming embossed gold.
“This is an important concept,” he said as he made a circular gesture in the air, and the word spun around so that Etheria could read it.
The word was: REALIZE.
“Quite simply Etheria, if you can’t realize magic, then it doesn’t exist for you, and that’s what happened to your Mother. She was surrounded by such wondrous beauty in Thenken, but she didn’t realize that it was magic. For her, every day was dark and gloomy with an ever present threat of rain. For her, it was like the colour was gradually bleeding to grey all around the edges of her perception.”
Etheria could sense a subtle change in her father’s voice. It was becoming quieter, and cracking slightly with emotion. He floated out over the chasm below them, and spun gently in mid-air.
The Princess looked at the flaming word that continued to hang in the air, and beyond it her father floating cross-legged—both of them acts that even in Thenken could be considered magical. How could somebody not see that?
“You see Etheria, for some people, magic requires a certain level of infrequency to keep it…well…magical,” said her father answering her unspoken question. “You do too much magic for them, and it simply ceases to be magical. It becomes ordinary. Commonplace. That’s why so many people in the waking world become disenchanted with their daily lives, because the wonder that permeates that world has become so expected that it’s essentially become invisible to most.”
The King looked up and around him at the faces carved in ancient stone as if he could no longer handle looking at the Princess. His hand had found its familiar way to the amber pendant once more.
“Add to that the lesson that we’ve been taught by most fairy tales: that magic only exists in enchanted places like Thenken. In the most common form of these fairy tales, the protagonist is plucked away from their humdrum and boring existence, thrust into a world of wonder for a time, and then ultimately returned to their former reality hopefully a little wiser. More often than not though, they resume their toleration of their routine existence, and pine fo
r the day that they can return to the enchanted kingdom.”
The King returned his gaze to his young daughter.
“I don’t know too many fairy tales that expound upon what happens to the heroes beyond ‘happily ever after’. I do know however how your Mother, the Queen dealt with it. Over time, she grew increasingly unhappy here in the forest, as the fantastic became commonplace for her. So every day, I would perform some new magic for her to try and force her to realize the wonder of it—the magic of it. And every day she refused to realize it.”
He swallowed again, and wiped at his eyes with the back of his hand.
“In time, she grew increasingly distant, and eventually she began to fade away, until I could no longer see her at all.” As the King spoke, the flaming golden word floating in the air between them finally began to sputter and dim. The red-tipped flames grew smaller and smaller until they disappeared, and the word eventually faded completely from view. The first four letters of the word were the last to extinguish, so that for a moment a new word, real, hung there before finally folding in on itself. The significance of this fact was not lost to Etheria even as she began to notice a considerable lump in her throat. Then her eyes began to water up, and tears formed at their edges. She swallowed hard and asked haltingly, unable to wait any longer.
“Where did she go?”
Rowan smiled supportively. It was the kind of enigmatic expression he gave whenever it was clear that he was expecting Etheria to figure something out for herself. So, she looked back at the falls, took a few deep breaths, and began to think about it. Almost immediately, Etheria’s energy peaked, as she reflected on what she had just been told.
It was an odd feeling for her. She could visualize so many possible answers, and they all seemed perfectly viable because she wasn’t rejecting any of them for being too outlandish. She was also amazed at her ability to sort and organize the possibilities in her head. She was forming visual groups of related ideas in her imagination, and each idea was first evaluated and then assigned to an appropriate category. She could visualize each idea individually, or several all at once. She realized with a smile that this was the effect of the harmonization between intuition and logic.
She was balanced. She was integrated.
In no time at all, she had come up with the only possible answer and gave it a voice.
“My dreams?” It was meant as more of a statement, but came out as more of a question.
Rowan smiled proudly at his young daughter, and said, “Well done! You’re pretty much exactly right. There’s a little more to it though.” He paused for a moment to think. “Let me see if I can explain.”
He floated out further over the chasm; Thenken’s current King surrounded by images in rock of the Royalty who came before, and by others who were still to come. He raised his voice dramatically as he spoke.
“Thenken is a dream world Etheria. And you are not a permanent resident here. You are a frequent visitor.”
He paused to let his words sink in. Etheria’s eyes were wide with wonder, and the energy flowing through her body began to vibrate at a much higher frequency.
Her father continued.
“You are the first child in a millennia to exist both in Thenken and the waking world. Quite simply, when you are asleep in one world, you are awake in the other. “
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