I ran to the door and slammed my fists against it. “Frankie! Open the door! Open the fucking door!” I shouted, banging on it with my balled-up fists. There was no answer. Only dead silence.
I pounded harder, tears streaming down my face. I wanted to see my brother. I wanted to beg and plead with Frankie not to hang Cash. “Open the door!” I screamed, smacking the door as hard as I could. “Open it NOW!”
“Cat,” Cash said calmly behind me again.
“No. They have to let us out!” I banged on the door harder then grabbed the handle and shook it. “They can’t do this! It’s wrong!” I shouted, smacking the door with my palm.
“Stop.”
The word was like a whip, striking me. I could feel Cash’s eyes boring into my back, his ire rising. But I hit the door again and again. My eyes were red and puffy and my nose running.
Cash let out a low sound of irritation. “You’re going to hurt yourself. Stop or I’ll stop you myself, Beauty Queen.”
I flattened my hand against the door and dropped my chin to my chest, breathing hard. I tried to block out his voice. It irritated me like never before. He might be mad but he was still calm. I wanted him to lose control. Fly off the handle. Yell ‘Fuck you!’ at the world. Instead, he stood there composed. It made me mad. Didn’t he care that we had been forced to marry and they’re going to kill him? I turned around and faced him, a complete mess of anger and ugly cry.
He was standing in the middle of the room, a prime example of control. His arm was around his ribcage, his face was a patchwork of bruises. His shirt and jeans had seen better days, torn here and there and splotched with dark blood or smeared with mud. His eyes were on me.
I kicked off my shoes – I hated the things – and stomped over to him¸ stopping only when the tips of my toes touched the edges of his boots.
“How can you stand there, cold as ice, knowing they might kill you tomorrow? Don’t you care? Don’t you feel anything?” I shrieked.
He glowered down at me. “I feel things, sweetheart.”
“Then show it! Yell, scream, do something!”
He clenched his bruised jaw, making the muscle under his day’s growth of beard tick. “What do you want me to do, Cat? Throw a fit? Hit a wall?”
“Yes!” I yelled, throwing my hands up. “It’s better than being so unemotional!” I pushed past him and stormed across the room on bare feet.
Cash turned and watched me through his swollen, blood-filled eyes. I paced with furious strides. Back and forth, back and forth, from the wall to the center of the room. I felt like a caged animal, eager to get out and run. The chill of the room didn’t register with me and the cold under my feet didn’t matter. I crossed my arms over my chest and stormed one way then another.
Cash sighed. I turned just in time to see him grab the backpack and limp to the wall. With his back to me, he was a study in male perfection. The broad shoulders. The muscular back. His bruised body was coiled taut. He did everything with grace and strength, from walking across the room to making love to me in a barn.
He leaned against the wall and slid down, grimacing and holding his side. Sitting, he bent his knees and pulled the backpack to him. I chewed my bottom lip, pain hitting my chest at the sight of his battered face.
He unzipped the backpack and pulled out a small blanket. Tossing it aside, he reached in and withdrew a package of crackers and a bottle of liquor. Whiskey. The good kind, if my dad had taught me anything.
He unscrewed the bottle, his gaze flicking up to mine. “Tell your boyfriend thank you for me.”
I rolled my eyes and tried not to stare as he tipped the bottle to his mouth and took a long drink. Brown liquid splashed past his lips. His strong throat worked to swallow.
Glancing away, I started pacing again. I had to think. We needed to figure a way out. There were four walls. No windows. A bucket for bathroom needs. Fuck. Great.
“Come here, Cat.”
His voice sent tingles up my spine. I could feel his eyes on me. “No.”
I paced to the wall then back around. Ignore him. Ignore him. When I turned, his eyes pinned me in place.
“Don’t make me get up, Beauty Queen. Come here and sit down.”
“No,” I said again, marching to the middle of the room and back. “We’ve got to figure out what we’re going to do.”
“There’s nothing we can do.”
His tone was so final, so absolute. I felt a punch to my gut that almost doubled me over. I turned around. He was lowering the liquor bottle, the sound of whiskey sloshing against the glass loud.
Angry and hurting, I crossed the room in quick strides. “Are you just going to give up? Just like that?”
Cash peered up at me as I approached, his bloodshot eyes swollen. “No. I’m facing reality, Cat. There’s nothing we can do.”
I flung my arms out in frustration. “Of course there’s something we can do! We can fight. We can try to get out. We can’t just give up and allow them to hang you!”
“Yes, we can,” Cash mumbled, raising the bottle to his mouth again.
I clenched my fists and started pacing again. “Ugh!” I was angrier.
Cash watched me, sipping the whiskey and holding his side. I ignored him and thought through different scenarios. Could we hold someone hostage when they came to get Cash? Maybe we could grab a gun and escape?
“What did you mean when you told Frankie you had a deal?” Cash’s voice rang out in a deep rumble.
I paused. My heart pounded. He sounded furious. Irate.
“I..um…” I started pacing again and sneaking peeks at him. “I agreed to do anything he wanted in exchange for your freedom along with Tate and David’s.”
Cash set the bottle down slowly. His gaze was hard, his voice deadly quiet. “Over my dead body, Cat.”
I snorted and rolled my tear-filled eyes. “Jeez, did you hear what you just said?” Swiping a tear away from my cheek, I started pacing again. “It doesn’t matter. Frankie’s not going to let you go.”
“Oh, it matters, sweetheart. This is exactly why I wanted you to stop loving me.”
Hurt tore through me. I spun around, livid. “Well, too bad. I’ll never stop loving you.”
Anger radiated off him. He clenched his fists and clamped his jaw with barely controlled fury. A heartbeat passed then two. He deflated and shoved a hand through his hair. “Fuck,” he hissed. “Damn, Cat, I don’t know what to do.”
Seeing him so broken destroyed me. All the anger left me in a whoosh. I went to his side and dropped down. He lifted his eyes and looked at me. I took his face in my hands and scooted closer. The bruises. The dried blood. New tears formed behind my eyes. They had hurt him – this man that was so strong. If they could do that to him, what else were they capable of?
“Don’t give up, Cash,” I whispered, finding strength for both of us. “I’ll do whatever you say. I’ll tell you I don’t love you. I’ll say I hate you. I’ll do whatever it takes. I just need you to fight.”
“Then leave me. At the first chance you get, grab Tate and run.”
I shook my head, dropping my hands and lowering my gaze. “I can’t.”
He lifted my chin, forcing me to look at him. “Yes, you can. I was going to leave you. Does that make the decision any easier?”
My mind went blank. Pain squeezed my chest. “No.” I forced the word out.
He let out a soft curse and let me go. Grabbing the whiskey bottle, he took a long drink.
I waited. Afraid. Terrified. Hurt.
He lowered the bottle and sat it back down beside him. Regret and pain crossed his face. “I thought it would be for the best, leaving you. I was going to get you and Tate home then take off.” He scoffed and shook his head. “I was a fucking fool. There’s no way I could walk away from you – I know that now – but you gotta leave me, sweetheart. I can’t have you stay and watch what’s going to happen tomorrow.”
Tears blurred my vision. My chin quivered. My throat closed up unt
il I thought I would suffocate.
Cash cupped my face in his palm. Swallowing hard, he wiped a tear away from my cheek with his thumb. “Go with Adam. He’ll get you out before it happens and make sure you and Tate get somewhere safe. And – shit – I want you to stay with him. He’ll love you and keep you safe. I can die knowing you’ll be okay.”
“No.” I shook my head, the tears so thick that I couldn’t see now. “I…I can’t do that, Cash. Don’t ask me to.”
He put his hand on the back of my head and pulled me closer. His voice dropped to a rugged rasp and his gaze became heated.
“Do you think I want to suggest or even think of him touching you? You’re mine. You have been ever since I stood between your legs and took you on that bathroom counter. But I don’t want you to be there when I die. I want to close my eyes as they put the noose around my neck and know you’re somewhere safe, away from this hellhole. I want the last thing I think about to be the way you looked the night we met, standing in front of Cooper’s in the rain. I want to die knowing you’ll be okay. Give me that please.”
I shook my head, tears falling down my cheeks. “I won’t be okay, cowboy. Not without you.”
He swore and pulled me closer, putting his forehead against mine.
“I know, sweetheart, God do I know. But I need you to do this. Leave me. Go with Adam. Run.”
I cried and grasped the front of his shirt. He tightened his fingers in my hair and pressed his lips against my forehead.
“Forget about me, Cat. Forget about me and move on.”
Chapter Thirty–Four
Cat
I threw my leg over Cash and climbed into his lap. I needed to be as close to him as possible.
My dress slid up my thighs. Goosebumps rose on my arms from his heat in front of me and the coldness behind me. Grasping his face, I cupped his cheeks with my hands. I couldn’t talk. Couldn’t agree to what he said. All I wanted to do was be as close to him as possible.
“Cat—” he groaned, his hand going to my waist.
“Don’t talk,” I whispered. “Do this instead.”
I lowered my head and kissed him¸ my mouth sliding over his. He tasted like malt whiskey. Intoxicating. Heady. Drunkenly good. I glided my tongue over his lower lip, sampling the taste. He let out a low sound deep in his throat and grasped the back of my head. His mouth angled over mine, taking over. He urged my lips apart with pressure. When I gave in, his tongue was immediately there, dipping inside.
I moaned against his mouth, melting and falling apart, as he licked and consumed. When the cut on his lip brushed against me, I started to pull away. A deep growl of displeasure erupted from him. He fisted a hand in my hair and held me tight. There was no escaping but I wasn’t going anywhere.
His tongue plunged back inside while his fingers kept me captive. I let go of his face and ran my hands up his chest. When my fingers grazed his ribs, he drew in a sharp breath.
I froze and pulled my mouth away. “I’m sorry. We shouldn’t do this. You’re hurt and…”
He seized my mouth again, cutting off the rest of the sentence. This time there was no mercy. No romantic overtures. I didn’t know where I ended and he began. We were desperate. We had to touch. Nothing would have stopped us, not even the end of the world.
He reached down and ran his hand under the edge of my dress. His fingers were warm. Rough. Strength against softness.
I reached between us and lowered his zipper. He let out a low groan against my mouth when I wrapped my fingers around him and freed his hard-as-steel erection. Holding him in my hand, I rose to my knees. He pulled my panties to the side.
We couldn’t wait. Like two high school kids doing something forbidden, we were feverish to have each other.
At least one more time.
I aimed the tip of his cock at my opening and slowly lowered down. He sucked in a breath against my lips and wrapped his arm around my waist. A little mewl sound of pleasure escaped me as I was filled inch by inch by his hardness.
It was heaven; it was hell. I pulled my mouth from his and bit my bottom lip as I started moving on him. His arm was banded around me. He gave me all the control.
I started breathing harder, moving on him. I was close to tears, letting out little sounds of frustration, but beneath the sensations lay harsh reality. This was it. Our last time.
A broken sob tore from me. Cash grasped both sides of my face and looked into my eyes.
“It’s okay,” he whispered, sliding in and out of me. “It’ll be okay.”
Tears rolled down my cheeks.
“Hell,” he whispered seeing me cry. He slipped his hand around to the back of my neck and pulled my mouth to his. He kissed me gently. Tenderly. Heartbreakingly sweet. We made love leisurely, soaking in every moment, every thrust of him in me. We touched. We reveled in every sensation. He took his time. Filling me. Going deep. I wanted it to last forever but forever wasn’t possible.
Little shockwaves started building in my body. I whimpered incoherently against his mouth. My tears were captured by the rough stubble on his chin and cheeks.
He grasped my hips tighter, his fingers digging into my hips. Against my lips he whispered, “You make me want to never give up, Cat. You make me want to live.”
Just like that, I exploded. A cry escaped me. He moaned and grasped me tight to him as spasms rocked my body.
Rapid, little breaths left me as I convulsed around him. Cash tangled his fingers into my hair and moved faster in and out of me. I buried my face in the curve of his neck as the orgasm shook me. The muscles in his arms tensed. I kept moving on him. He was close to coming; I could hear his breathing increase.
I lifted my head. My hair was plastered to my skin, my cheeks wet from tears. His eyes were closed as I rode him, savage pleasure twisting his beautiful, battered face.
I kissed his jaw. “I’m yours always,” I whispered against the rough stubble.
He groaned and his fingers tightened in my hair. His body went stiff under me. White hot cum erupted deep inside me.
“Fuck. Fuck.” He continued to come in me, his thick cock ejaculating. My walls clamped around him, forming a snug seal, as he continued to gush into me.
He let go of my hair and slid his hand down to my hip, leaving imprints on my skin as he held me tight and pumped into me until every drop was released. Only then did he stop, buried to the hilt and nudging my cervix with his wide head.
My pulse was racing so hard I couldn’t hear it. He let out a deep rumble of masculine satisfaction and let go of my hip to curve his hand around my neck. Pulling me toward him, his mouth covered mine with fierce possession. I had no choice. No reason to resist. I melted against him and let him claim me, my body weightless, throbbing around his pulsating hardness.
Every emotion was behind his kiss. Desperation. Insatiable need. A demand to remember him and this. I answered them all. I would give him anything. Everything. I already had and I would do it again.
After a minute, his kiss gentled. His cut, bruised lips brushed over mine. Sorrow at remembering why they were hurt made me want to cry.
He let go of my neck and eased out of me, moving my panties back in place with all the tenderness in the world. As soon as he was tucked into his jeans, he pulled me to his chest. I went willingly, exhaustion winning out. My body went limp and my eyelids were suddenly heavy as his arm cradled me close.
The world slowed down. The roaring in my ears dissipated. I could hear Cash’s heartbeat under my ear, strong and powerful. It was as familiar to me as my own. His masculine scent invaded my senses and his warmth surrounded me.
I felt small. Protected.
Terrified suddenly.
New tears prickled the backs of my eyes. I realized it might be the last time he would hold me. Make love to me. Whisper my name.
I buried my face in his neck and breathed him in, a tear falling down my cheek and landing on his skin.
He ran his hand up my back to the area between my shoul
der blades. “Don’t cry,” he whispered against my hair. “It kills me when you do.”
I sniffed and tried to stop for him but the tears kept on coming. He didn’t say anything else. He just held me as I cried.
We stayed that way for a while, me straddling his lap, him holding me close. I wept until tiredness pulled at me. When my eyes started to close, I forced them back open. I wasn’t ready to fall asleep yet. I didn’t want to wake up and it be tomorrow.
But I had been through too much in the past twenty-four hours. My body was worn out. My emotions drained. When I lost the battle and sleep started to win, Cash seemed to know. He lowered me to the ground and stretched out beside me. Putting his arm under my head for a pillow, he grabbed the small blanket and pulled it over us.
I watched him through half-closed eyes. His full lips were firm. His sharp jaw was covered with a day’s growth of beard. Bruises marred his face and I could see more peeking out of the collar of his shirt.
He tucked the blanket around me and rolled onto his back, bringing me with him. I snuggled against his chest.
“I’m scared to close my eyes,” I murmured, sleep pulling at me.
Cash pressed his lips to my forehead. “It’s okay. No one’s going to hurt you. I’m right here.”
“But what about tomorrow?”
He stilled. I felt him swallow. His breathing stopped.
“It doesn’t matter. We have tonight,” he whispered against my forehead, his voice hoarse. Broken.
My throat was thick with tears. They fell down my chin and soaked into his shirt. He kissed my forehead again and mumbled something. I wanted to ask what he said but exhaustion finally won out. I fell asleep, my cheeks wet.
And dreamed that he had said ‘I love you.’
~~~~
I imagined ice crystals on my skin. Shivering in my sleep, I burrowed closer to the immense heat next to me. Warm fingers pushed my dress higher up my thighs. Lips kissed the area below my ear.
“Open for me,” a deep voice whispered, his hand easing up my leg.
I moaned and bent one knee, somewhere in that place between wakefulness and sleep. Rough stubble brushed my throat. A male sound of appreciation rumbled in my ear.