I stuffed myself into the stupid little seat in Mrs. Gerber's room and slouched, trying to find space for my legs under the desk. You'd think someone would have figured out by now that some of us juniors are a bit big for these sucky chair-connected-to-desk combo things and replaced them. But nooo. My third year coming into this room, and I'm six-five now, so I have to fold like a pretzel.
I let my eyes close halfway and waited as the room filled up, but I wasn't so out of it that I missed Landon coming in the door. He was laughing at something the guy behind him said, waving his hands like he does, with that wide grin on his face, and my dick stood up and saluted immediately. I slouched lower and hoped no one would notice.
Of course, he stopped by my desk. “Hey, Jerry.”
“Hey, Lanny.” He made a face at me, and I glared back. My name's Jerrod and he knows I hate nicknames.
“Listen, Chris and I are going to the Keystone tonight. Want to come?”
“Are you nuts?” We'd broken up a month ago. It hadn't seemed to faze him much—he'd quickly found a new guy—but I'd been pretty sore about it for a while.
Landon gave that little one-sided shrug I used to think was cute. “Come on, Jerrod. It's no big deal. We're friends, right? We can just hang out, scope out the guys together, sneer at the rednecks down the street.”
Hah. There was just a little ring of extra truth in that last bit. And I guessed I knew why he wanted to be all buddies again.
I never took any shit for being gay. I'd been out since last year. Landon had made me go to the GSA and be visible when we were dating, and it had been worth it to have him. Plus I really hate lying. So I'd done it, and been all out and proud, and I was big enough and tough enough that no one called me out for it, at least to my face. Landon liked that about me. He liked hanging out with me at school, because he could be as flaming as he wanted and no one messed with him when I was around. And he liked parading me in front of the straight guys around town sometimes. It looked like he was missing that part of being with me.
“So, just the two of us?” I asked, to needle him a bit with Chris standing right there bumping his hip. “Like old times?”
“Well, no, you and me and Chris, and maybe we can find another guy there that you'd go for. Have some fun. Maybe even fun all together.” He winked, and ran his tongue over his lips, and despite my brain knowing it was him putting on a move, my body went on full alert at that.
But I said roughly, “Forget it.” and looked away. I thought about icebergs and gross stuff, to take the edge off. Right then, I didn't want people to notice me still getting hot for Landon, and the reason why had just come through that door, looking damned good herself.
Yeah, I said her. After Landon and I broke up I started looking around, you know? Because I like having somebody to be with, and not just for the sex... Wait; if you're a parent-type person or teacher or something, put your fingers in your ears for a moment, 'kay?
For the non-uptight peeps, yes, we had sex. Me and Landon. Come on. We'd been two sixteen-year-old guys who'd long ago figured out what that body part was for. You think we wouldn't try out all the ways it can be put to good use? That had been one of the best parts about discovering I was gay. Because another guy wants a lot more sex than a girl does, at least in my limited experience.
That turned out to be the bad side too, because Landon liked sex a whole ton, even more than I did. And he decided he liked it with other guys too. I'm not a prude, but I kind of prefer to be doing one person at a time, even if there weren't diseases and AIDS and shit out there. So we broke up.
After that, I started looking at other people again, and when my eye found someone who made me heat up and take notice, it turned out to be Danielle. A girl. A very pretty girl.
So when Danielle came in the door to Geography class, my dick did the same sit-up-and-beg routine as when I saw Landon. Maybe even more. Because it's an equal opportunity joystick.
Danielle's just gorgeous. And hot. Long legs, tight little bod, shiny black curls to her waist, and a way of smiling that makes her cheeks round and her eyes bright. Danielle's too smart for me, really, but when I'd asked if she wanted to go to a movie and maybe get a burger tonight, she said yes, she'd love to. And she meant it. I was sure. Just like I was sure that Landon meant it when he said, “Sneer at the rednecks.”
Because I wasn't just the biggest guy in the class, and apparently bisexual, when I'd just got used to thinking I was gay. I was also, as far as I knew, the only Truth Reader in the school. Truth Reader – like, I can tell when someone's lying, if I concentrate enough or the lie is big enough to register. It comes from being a quarter Wanderer, and that's a whole other story. It's a bit relevant here, but not a ton, so just think stranded-aliens-back-in-my-pedigree, and that'll be enough to get you by.
Aliens. Don't freak out. You think NASA would spend all that money hunting for intelligent life in space, if they weren't pretty sure we're out there? And maybe they'll find my ancestors' home planet one day, and send a message or something. But we're all mixed in with humans now – I doubt any of my generation would really want to go back. For us it just means a skill or two that would let us star in Twilight. You don't believe me? That's good, because it's best for all of us if you don't.
Anyway, I've never told anyone who wasn't family. There's a few of us Wanderers around, and we pretty much all have different Traits, but even my people don't like to think you're reading their mind. Which this isn't, exactly—more of a nasty slithery feeling I get on the back of my neck, if someone doesn't truthfully believe the words coming out of their mouth. My Trait's not super unusual, but none of the other kids in the community have it, as far as I know.
To most humans, it would be a freak skill, like some kind of mega-ESP, so I'm even less likely to tell them; sometimes I get caught up in being human and it seems freaky even to me. And it's not as useful as you might think. Still, knowing it can be done means I usually tell the truth, myself.
So I said to Landon, “I'm not interested in going anywhere with you. Now or ever.”
He gave me a little sneer, and stuck his hand in Chris's back pocket, while watching me to see if I noticed. I didn't even bother to look away. After a minute Mrs. Gerber came in and the guys went off to their seats. Which were far away from me, praise Jesus and all his reindeer, while Danielle's was up front but closer.
I sat through Geography, and snuck a lot of looks at Danielle, and a few at Landon, and didn't learn much from the lecture. I guess it might be good one day for me to know where Yemen is, or what its capital is. But the odds are if I ever go there, it will only be as an Army draftee, if we screw up the Middle East worse than we already have.
Hopefully that won't happen. And unless I get drafted, well, my people don't tend to leave their community, so I knew chances were I'd live in the good ol' U S of A, probably right here in Angelwood, for the rest of my life. It didn't inspire me to pay attention.
I began planning my date with Danielle. First date. It'd been a while since I'd done that with a girl, and I'd learned a thing or two since then. And not just what you're thinking.
For a bunch of years I didn't use my Truth Reading skills much around my friends. I didn't always want to know if they were messing with me, ignorance sometimes being bliss and all. But I'd wanted to do right by Landon, as my first serious crush. I'd paid attention, and learned to use my talent now and then to tell how much truth was in his voice, so I could treat him the way he needed. So I'd know the difference between when he said, “That's fun,” and meant it, and when he said, “That's fine,” and didn't. Tonight was going to be all about making Danielle happy and paying the right kind of attention. Even if she was too good for me in the long run, I was determined to make a hell of a first impression.