“About that night we hunted you… I didn’t want to do that. I didn’t have anything against you or Gentry. I just didn’t have a choice.”
“Why not?” Blaire asked softly.
“You are rogue—”
“No, I’m not. I’m with the Strikers.”
“Who are all rogue. None of them have pledged to an alpha. They can go their separate ways tomorrow, and it wouldn’t hurt them. But I’m bound to Rhett, and he can control me in a lot of ways. Noah Striker wasn’t like that. He was a good alpha. Firm but kind. He was a protector, like his sons. My alpha is not. Anyway, I just wanted to say I’m sorry. I think about that night a lot. I’ll go to my grave with regrets about it.”
Blaire sighed and pulled into a parking spot next to Mila’s Jetta, then turned to her. “I forgive you.”
Mila closed her eyes for a moment and sighed. She hadn’t realized how much she’d needed Blaire’s forgiveness. She’d stood by for too long while Rhett had manipulated the town and the pack. “I’m really glad Odine was able to fix you.”
Blaire snorted. “Yeah, I’m just peachy now. I’m just waiting to, I don’t know, turn into a four-headed turtle or something. That woman ain’t right. I think she showed me actual Hell today.”
Mila laughed and drew her knees up to her chest. “Did you know Roman calls her Psychodine? Like…to the witch’s face, he says that.”
“Yeah, he’s not scared like he should be.”
Mila blew on the window, fogging it with her breath, and drew a cartoon broomstick. “Odine confuses me. She does bad things, uses bad magic, but she seems to be devoted to helping the Strikers. Do you know she is keeping Rhett weak?”
There was a frown in her voice when Blaire asked, “What do you mean?”
Mila leveled her with a look. “Gentry nearly ripped his throat out when the pack came after you, but Rhett should’ve healed by now. Instead, his injuries still look awful, and he smells like Odine’s magic. I don’t even want to know the extent of her power. We didn’t know she could do this kind of stuff until Noah died. She’s been coming for the pack ever since.”
“Has she come after you?” Blaire asked.
“Odine came after me years ago, when I was twenty. She keeps me here. I can never leave.”
“Why?”
Mila tried to remember the exact explanation Odine had given her. “She said because my destiny was here. She said Roman would need me someday.”
“Whoa,” Blaire murmured, rolling up the sleeve of her jacket to reveal her forearm covered in gooseflesh. “Mila, if Odine thinks you are Roman’s destiny, maybe you are. She said the same thing about me and Gentry. Sure, she brought us together, but he’s mine, Mila, and I’m his. Does Roman feel important to your wolf?”
Mila flopped her head back against the headrest. “He’s always felt important.”
There was a split second of hesitation before Blaire sang, “You’re gonna have his baaaabies.”
“Stop,” Mila said with a giggle.
“I’m calling it. You’ll have all boys, and they’ll all come out little miniatures of Roman, cracking pervy jokes and fully bearded.”
Mila wrapped her arms around her stomach as she laughed at the vision of it. “Little bearded babies would be so cuuute!”
“Do you know he eats his breakfast every morning in his underwear? While wearing one of those fur lined hats with the ear flaps? It’s ridiculous.”
“What kind of underwear?” Mila asked, blinking innocently.
“Briefs. With his shoes untied. Every morning. I’m pretty sure he does it to annoy me. Asher said as much, too.”
“He asked to be my alpha,” Mila admitted suddenly.
Blaire coughed really hard. “What?”
“He offered to break my bond to Rhett and put it on him.”
“Whoooah.” Blaire gripped the steering wheel and stared out the front window at the burger joint. “Would that work?”
“I think so, but it would get him killed. Rhett’s dangerous. That, and I’m bound to this place, and Roman is…well…Roman. Noah used to talk about all the places Roman lived. He doesn’t stay put. He’s a roamer. Saying yes means I ask him to stay bound to Rangeley, too, and surely you can see it. He doesn’t like it here. I don’t want to stick him in the cage with me just so I can keep him. I don’t do well caged, but it would eat Roman alive.”
“So what are you going to do?”
Mila pursed her lips and wiped away the broomstick drawing. “I’m going to get in my car, drive home, sleep like the dead, work my shift tomorrow, and think this all through. Maybe I’ll have more clarity away from Roman.”
“Ha! I used to think that would happen for me, too, but mostly I just thought of Gentry the entire time I was away from him. Good luck with that.”
Mila shoved the door open, got out, closed it, and turned to leave, but Blaire rolled down the window. “Hey Mila? I just wanted to say thank you.”
“For what?” She was part of the reason Blaire had been sick in the first place.
“For helping me in the woods when I didn’t feel good, and for helping Odine save me. She said you made the difference. Soooo…I don’t really know much about how this werewolf stuff works, but I don’t have a lot of friends in town, and I have exactly zero girlfriends, so if you ever want to…I don’t know…hang out and Change into wolves together and run around the woods or hunt a bunny or something, I would be totally fine with that.”
Mila laughed and leaned onto the window. “Blaire, are you asking me on a friend date?”
“Yeah.” Blaire grinned. “Like a werewolf friend date.”
Mila scanned the parking lot to make sure they weren’t being watched by any of the Bone-Rippers and then pulled out her cell phone and saved the number Blaire recited for her. “I’ll call you,” Mila promised as she walked away.
“Or a turkey,” Blaire called as Mila got into her car. “I like those, too.”
As Mila turned on her Jetta to warm it up and watched Blaire drive away, a strange feeling drifted through her. Was this…was it hope? It had been a while since she’d felt that emotion, but yes, it seemed right. Blaire wasn’t as submissive as Mila, but she wasn’t overwhelmingly dominant. She was happy and funny, and maybe if Mila was really careful not to get caught, she could hang out with the White Wolf of Winter’s Edge. And maybe that would be more of an excuse to accidentally see Roman, too.
She had to say no to Roman’s offer to be her alpha, but she couldn’t help but imagine how it could be. He would be good to her. Protective. Maybe over time, he would even grow to care for her like she cared for him.
Sure, Rhett threw a wrench in everything, but still, it was fun to imagine a better life with Roman. One where Rhett didn’t exist.
She coasted through town in a daze as her mind spun around all that had happened today, but as she passed her old house on Marina Road, someone tall, muscled, sexy, and bearded caught her attention. Roman was out in the front yard of Regina Delphine’s house, building something giant in the snow.
“What in the hell?” she murmured, pulling over to the curb. She poked the automatic window button and waited for it to roll all the way down before she asked, “What are you doing?”
Roman packed on one more handful of snow, then turned with a grin. “Come here and look at the present I made for you.”
There were two giant snow balls on either side of a tall cylinder shape. Oh, dear God, Roman had built a giant dick, complete with circumcision and pee-pee hole. Mila died laughing, and Roman’s grin grew bigger as he rested his hands on his hips and stared at her with those bright blue dancing eyes of his.
Still cracking up, Mila got out and jogged over the yard to him.
“Okay, okay, wait,” Roman said between laughs. “There is a story behind this.”
“Illuminate me, please,” she gasped out, clicking pictures with her phone. She made sure to include Roman because he was wearing her favorite smile along with a plain white T-sh
irt, jeans that were caked in snow, and heavy boots. He looked hot as hell right here in the middle of a Maine winter.
“So I went to Blaire because I had questions.”
“What kind of questions?” she asked, playing along.
“I said, ‘You have tits and a vagina…’”
“God, here we go…and what did she say?”
“She said, ‘Yeeeees.’ Just like that, she drew out the word, and her face was all scrunched up like a squirrel and suspicious looking. And then I said, ‘So you understand girl stuff.’ And she mushed up her face even more and said, ‘I guess.’ So then I said, ‘How do I get a girl to want to…’ And since she’s smart and uses all these big words, I figured she’d get what I was saying.”
“I don’t even get what you’re saying.”
“So then I said, ‘How do I get a girl to suck my dick for life.’”
“Roman! Wait.” Realization slammed into her. “Sucking your dick for life? Were you talking about me?” That was the sweetest thing he’d ever said.
“Focus, Chicken. So then Blaire said, ‘Aaaaw,’ and looked ridiculous and mushy, made me want to barf, but then she told me I should do a grand gesture for you.” Roman held out his hand like Vanna White to the giant dick. “And I can’t think of anything grander than an eight-foot snow penis in your front yard.”
The light flipped on in the house, and Mila couldn’t help her laughter if she tried. Roman looked proud as a rooster.
“It’s the greatest gift anyone has ever made for me,” she forced out past her giggling, “but this isn’t my yard anymore.”
The smile fell from Roman’s face so fast she peeled into laughter all over again.
“I moved out of this house when my dad moved to Michigan. Mrs. Delphine lives here now.”
“Ooooooh,” Roman said, biting back a smile. “That’s kind of funny, but it’s also kind of bad. She never liked me.”
“You toilet papered her house every Saturday for three months straight, Roman. She hated you.” Mila rested her hands on his chest right over those perfectly puckered nipples. She could feel the cold metal of his piercings through the fabric. She was turned on, but even more than that, she was feeling mushy, just like he’d described Blaire. This was a really sweet gesture in a Roman-esque way. He was out here in the middle of the night, in the freezing cold, building her a snow-pecker.
Hope bloomed a little bigger in her chest.
Mila lifted up on her toes and kissed his lips as she slid her arms slowly up his chest and around his neck. Geez, how was he this warm? Sure, she ran warm, too, thanks to the wolf, but Roman ran hot as fire. He angled his head and pushed his tongue past her lips as he gripped her waist. His thumb brushed her bare skin under the hem of her shirt, and oooh, her body was melting from the center outward right now.
“What in tarnation is that?” Mrs. Delphine yelled from her front porch.
Mila and Roman froze, lips locked, unmoving like they both thought Mrs. Delphine was some movement-seeking raptor who would catch onto them if they even breathed.
“Roman Striker? Is that you?” She wrenched her voice up so high it hurt Mila’s ears so that she had to hunch her shoulders.
Roman disengaged with a soft smack sound. He was grinning. “We should go.”
“Yep.”
“I’m calling the police!” Mrs. Delphine hollered as Roman guided Mila back to the car at a speed-walk.
Mila was trying not to laugh, she really was, but when he closed Mila’s door the second she was safely inside, he remorselessly called, “You have a good night, Mrs. Delphine!” as he strode toward his silver Wrangler parked across the street.
Mila giggled the entire way to her house with Roman’s headlights glaring into her car as he followed her. Gosh, today had been the best day. And it wasn’t even over yet! Sure, it had been a complete roller coaster—breakfast with Roman, Rhett’s terrifying alpha female proposal, Blaire getting sick, the witch’s house, the recovery, and the fun little girls’ night with Blaire. And now the snow-penis? She couldn’t even remember the last time she felt happy like this. Or safe, which was a really big deal. But right now, with Roman so close, she wasn’t even worried about the pack. She was just excited to see him again, touch him again, and kiss him again. She hadn’t laughed this much in…well…since she’d hung out with Roman when they were kids.
When she pulled into the driveway of her little rental house, painted daffodil yellow with white trim, she checked the pictures on her phone to make sure she got good ones of Roman’s present. She couldn’t take her eyes from Roman, smiling so big, looking at her as though he’d missed her. As though she was beautiful. He looked so happy. Did she make him feel like he made her feel? Light with moments of utter freedom? He had the best smile. The best in the world. Big grin, laugh lines at the corners of his bright blue eyes, straight white teeth, and that sexy beard. She hadn’t ever really liked facial hair until Roman.
With a happy little squeak, she pushed open her door, and he was there, her knight in shining nipple bars. She should feel sick right now with Rhett’s orders, but she didn’t. Maybe Roman had good magic.
“Hi,” she said, feeling a little less brave, and a little shyer, as she stood looking at him.
“Hey, Chicken, don’t freeze up on me now. You were doing good back there.”
Her cheeks flushed at the compliment as he gripped her waist and eased her back against the car. “I liked how you kissed me. You didn’t hesitate. I know it’s not in your nature to do what you want with a dominant, but that’s how I can tell you like me.”
“I do like you.” Mila wished her voice didn’t shake when she said it, but that couldn’t be helped. He was making her whole body shake. Not in fear, but in anticipation.
Roman angled his face and frowned slightly, then pulled her closer to him gently and rested his cheek onto hers. He inhaled deeply and just stood there, holding her. Whatever he was doing worked because she settled. No…her wolf settled.
And a sudden fear seized her. She was falling so hard, so fast, but he was a temporary fixture here. This was going to hurt when he left. It was going to cut much deeper than she was prepared for. “I think I like you too much,” she whispered.
“You don’t. You can’t. There’s no such thing as too much.”
“But I get tempted to say yes.”
Roman rubbed his beard against her cheek and plucked at her earlobe with his lips. “Yes to me breaking your bond?”
“Mmm hmm,” she murmured, closing her eyes against how good his lips felt on her ear. That had always been a sensitive spot for her, and somehow Clever Roman had found it right away.
When he brushed his tongue softly against her lobe, Mila let off a helpless sound and melted against his chest completely.
“When you’re ready, tell me, and I’ll fix it, Mila. I’ll fix what’s happening, keep you safe. I’ll protect you from Rhett, from the pack, from Odine, from everything.”
What a beautiful promise, whispered right there in her ear, ringing with honest notes that said Roman truly believed he could be her protector. And she trusted him. He was strong. She’d seen him fighting the pack, trying to keep Blaire safe with his brothers. He’d been the ripper. She hadn’t been able to take her attention from his deadly grace.
Roman eased away and slid his big, strong hand around hers, then led her up to the door. “Are you as big a slob as you were when you were a kid?” he asked.
Mila giggled and shoved his shoulder gently. “No. I keep a clean den.”
“Not me. I like chaos.”
“Deal-breaker,” she teased. “We wouldn’t ever work, Roman. I can’t live in clutter.”
“Oh, that’s the deal breaker? Chicken, you’ll find out a hundred worse things about me that’ll make you want to run. My tidiness won’t even be a blip on your radar.”
“Like what?” she asked as she shoved the key in the door and opened it.
“Like I talk in my sleep. Or so I’m told
. I don’t wake myself up. I tell stories, but with words that don’t make sense.”
“Casting spells?” she joked, but when she looked over her shoulder, Roman was frowning.
“Something like that.” He stepped inside and flipped on the light switch beside the door.
Mila inhaled deeply, searching for her bravery, and pushed his chest until his back was up against the wall. “Tell me something else. Something real.”
Roman looked truly disturbed when he whispered the next admission. “Today when I knew you were in trouble? Your mom was the one who told me.”
Mila froze. Once upon a time, in the woods when they were kids, he had talked about her mother. She had thought he’d meant to hurt her, but now she knew he hadn’t. Some instinct told her Roman had many demons, and one of them was that he could see beyond the veil. What torture. Mila hugged his waist and rested her cheek against his drumming heartbeat. “I know you see them, Roman. I wish you didn’t.”
“They go away when you touch me,” he said in a gravelly voice.
Mila looked up at him, resting her chin against his sternum. She couldn’t help her smile. “Really?”
Roman searched her face as he brushed her bangs to the side. “Odine isn’t the only one with magic, Mila. You have the good kind inside of you. The kind that makes the darkness inside of me feel smaller.”
Mila’s stomach was filled with the fluttering sensation of butterflies. Roman was spilling something important. No jokes, no running. He was here with her, admitting deep, dark secrets.
“What else?” She wanted to hang onto his every word.
“I was born human.”
Mila blinked hard and shook her head. That, she would’ve never expected in a hundred years. “What? How?”
“I just found out recently. My mom was human, and my brothers and I were all born human. Odine put wolves in us. It’s what my dad wanted. He didn’t want human sons. It’s why our animals are all fucked up. There are…side effects to her magic.”
“Is that why you see ghosts?”
Roman dipped his chin once.
Mila pressed her palm against his heart. It was beating way too fast. “Are you afraid that will matter to me?”