“Sorry.” Zoe grimaced. “I seriously try not to think about it unless absolutely necessary. Plus, after I found out you’d be coming tonight, there was no way I was going to risk you backing out.”
Before Dana could reply, an amused male voice behind them said, “You two enjoying the show?”
Dana felt her body come to life as it always did around Ash. Even when he was being an asshole, she couldn’t resist the pull she felt toward the handsome devil. If he only knew how many times he’d been the material for her solo hand sessions—if there was a God, he’d never discover that humiliating fact. Smirking, she whispered, “At what point does she give big brother a hug?”
“A hug?” Zoe hissed. “You mean a lap dance, right? I swear, she once straddled Ash’s knee and—”
“Why don’t we leave that painful memory in the past,” Ash interrupted her wryly. “Contrary to what women might believe, all men don’t actually get off on the twisted shit.” When Dana turned her head to give him a disbelieving look, he amended, “With family members. Hell, even if she wasn’t my stepsister, I still wouldn’t be interested in her. She’s not my type.”
Now Zoe leveled a stare in her brother-in-law’s direction and he scowled at them in return. “I realize that the whole Brittany thing might have damaged my credibility a tad, but I’m not into aggressive blondes with agendas bigger than my . . . well, you get my drift.”
Reaching a hand back to pat his impressive chest, Dana gave him her best wide-eyed airhead look before saying, “Ah, honey, we know that. You just like ’em dumb. It’s nothing to be ashamed of, everyone has a preference. Plus, I imagine it makes life easier when they don’t do complicated things like think for themselves. I bet Brittany was perfectly content to let you order for her off the McDonald’s Dollar Menu every time.”
“They have a lot of options with those Happy Meals now.” Zoe laughed. “I mean, really, should you have to choose between extra fries and fruit?”
Biting her lip to keep from laughing at Ash’s pained expression, Dana said, “I’m fairly certain it’s all about the toy for Brittany. From what I can recall, she’s not eating more than maybe two fries for a meal.”
The smile froze on Dana’s face when she felt a hand land on her ass cheek and squeeze lightly. Then Ash’s silky voice whispered in her ear, “I’ve got no complaints about where your food goes, sweetheart. And for the record, I’ve always been an ass man.” Dana shuddered as his breath whispered against her neck before he stepped back and walked away.
She was still frozen in place when Zoe nudged her in the arm before fanning herself. “That was so hot even I was melting.” Then, as if she was afraid that Dana had taken his words as another insult, she quickly added, “He wasn’t being nasty this time. I was watching him as he was talking to you and he was so in the zone. There wasn’t an ounce of anything other than admiration on his face.”
“Er—what the hell is he up to?” Dana winced as her voice came out unusually high pitched. She took a moment to relax before turning fully to face her friend. “That’s not the way our relationship works. Honestly, he can’t go saying crazy stuff now after being a jerk all this time. How am I supposed to work under this kind of pressure? I’ll be walking on eggshells wondering if he’s going to do something insane like utter a sentence that isn’t cruel or scathing. He’s going to have to lock that shit down, you know what I’m saying?”
Zoe appeared utterly confused as she shrugged her shoulders. “Um—I guess. Sometimes men are bastards. I personally hate it when Dylan admires my body. It makes me feel so dirty. Ash has a lot of explaining to do.”
There really was something to be said for the loyalty of a girlfriend, Dana thought. Even though it was obvious that she didn’t really understand Dana’s reasoning, Zoe was pulling on her boots and preparing to fight in the trenches with her. What she couldn’t tell the other woman was that even though it hurt like hell at times, she could pull on her armor and mostly handle Ash when he was being a dick. But a sexy, complimentary Ash was altogether different. She was very much afraid she had nothing that would save her should he decide to turn his legendary charm in her direction.
She liked to keep her relationships strictly physical with no complicated emotional attachments, which was absurdly easy since most men seemed just fine with that. It had worked well for her through the years. The few times she’d come across a potential clinger, she’d ended it and moved on. Sex didn’t need to be complicated and she wasn’t looking for the gold ring at the end of the rainbow. People hurt you when you gave them too much power. As long as you kept the facade up and pretended to let their words bounce off you, then the pain was manageable.
She knew it resulted from the hell she’d suffered in her teenage years, but didn’t everyone carry some kind of baggage from high school? Hell, your entire outlook on life, love, and relationships formed around then or at least hers had. Her lack of self-confidence had made it possible, but why split hairs? The end result was the same. And hadn’t she learned that she could live a perfectly happy existence without romantic attachments? It wasn’t as if she didn’t develop feelings for people. She loved Zoe like a sister, and she was even kind of fond of Dylan, although she’d never let him know it. The last guy she’d been involved with, Paul, had managed to find a tiny piece of her heart. She wasn’t a monster. She could appreciate a cute puppy, kitten, or even an occasional baby. She’d even gotten back together with Paul for a while after breaking up with him the first time, so she had given it more than a fair chance to grow into something serious, but it hadn’t—at least not on her end. But what she didn’t do was make herself vulnerable to a potential romantic partner. She’d already come dangerously close to doing that with Ash when she’d let some of his barbs find their mark. Now he was flirting with her? How did she handle that from a man who attracted her as no one else ever had?
Dana came abruptly out of her trance when Claudia suddenly appeared before her. She’d been so out of it she hadn’t even noticed her approach. Game time. Confidence oozed from the younger woman in waves as she put one hand on her hip and cocked a questioning brow in Zoe’s direction. Not bothering with a greeting, she simply asked, “Who’s your friend? I thought this was a family dinner.”
Without waiting for Zoe to speak, Dana drew herself up to her full height, which was still several inches below Claudia’s, before giving the rude chit a blank look. “Oh, who’re you?”
She could tell by the tightening of Claudia’s mouth that she didn’t like being dismissed. She felt like the star of the family and wanted to be treated as such. Well, too damn bad. “I’m Claudia,” she sneered.
“Oh, you’re the sister,” Dana replied dismissively. Turning to Zoe to push the point home that Claudia wasn’t important to her, she tossed over her shoulder, “I’m Dana, Ash’s girlfriend.”
“GIRLFRIEND?” the other woman practically shouted. Dana winked at Zoe and counted to ten before slowly turning to face the pain in the ass once again. “That’s right.” Then she pulled Claudia into a brief hug that drew a strangled gasp from Zoe. “Congratulations, sis, I heard you’re graduating from high school soon.” Patting Claudia’s shoulder in false sympathy, she lowered her voice as she added, “You look a bit older than the standard eighteen though. Good for you. It doesn’t matter how long it takes. I admire you for hanging in there after what must have been several years of failures.” Donning her most concerned expression, which was damned hard, she asked, “So what happened? Was it a boy who got you all distracted? I know how you kids are at that age. I bet he turned your head with a bunch of pretty words and big promises and then broke your heart.” By this point, Claudia’s mouth was hanging open in shock and Dana was having a hard time keeping it together. Zoe had long since turned to the side, no doubt trying to collect herself. “But you hung in there. I know it must be embarrassing to be so much older than the others, but who cares? You had a dream of
obtaining that diploma and you didn’t let a little thing like that stop you. I’m sure your friends have long moved on to finish college and begin careers and that you must feel abandoned by some of them. Do they still talk to you?” Claudia’s face was an alarming shade of red now as her jaw flapped up and down, but nothing came out. Dana figured she might as well take advantage of it and push a little harder before she found her voice. She dropped one hand and linked it with the boldly painted red nails that were hanging limply there. “I bet at least one of them is proud of you. If you decide to continue with your education, there’s no shame in being over thirty when you obtain your degree. People are getting married and starting families later in life now. They’ll just think you took some time off to find yourself before moving forward. You don’t look a day over twenty-five, so you’ll still fit in okay. I bet there’ll be some at least as old if not older, right, Zoe?”
Zoe swung around as if she’d been shot. Dana had to give her credit for the quick gulp before she readily replied, “Oh, absolutely. My mom is going back to school right now and she says there are plenty of senior citizens doing it, so you’ll actually look young to them.”
“I am not in fucking high school!” Claudia suddenly bellowed as she pulled herself violently away from the two of them.
Gotcha, Dana thought to herself as all attention was suddenly fixed upon them. She wanted to rattle the other woman and she’d succeeded beautifully. Her chest was heaving and she appeared to struggle for her words. “Oh, honey, I’m sorry,” Dana gushed out. “You didn’t make it after all? I had no idea. I could have sworn someone mentioned your upcoming graduation. I didn’t mean to hit on a painful subject. We all love you regardless, don’t we, Zoe?”
“Er—sure we do.” Her friend nodded quickly.
Claudia’s fingers were clenching and releasing in a way that should have been alarming. Dana figured they might soon be wrapped around her neck if she didn’t back off.
“Where did you come from?” Claudia snapped. “Asher doesn’t have serious girlfriends.” Dana could easily pick up on the note of jealousy in the younger woman’s voice and knew that Ash hadn’t been wrong to want to divert her attention. A crush was usually a harmless thing, but with someone like Claudia, it could turn into something else altogether.
“I wasn’t aware you were the authority on me, little sister,” Ash drawled silkily as he approached them. He stepped around Claudia and slid an arm around Dana as if it were the most natural thing in the world. “Now if you’re finished acting like the teenager you claim not to be, I’m ready for dinner.” He dropped a kiss onto Dana’s neck and steered her toward the double doors leading back into the house. “You sure know how to poke the hornet’s nest,” he added under his breath. “This is the most fun I’ve had at one of these damn family dinners in a long time. You’re worth every penny, munchkin.” Rolling her eyes, Dana jabbed him in the side for the nickname he couldn’t seem to let go. She was petite, not a freak. “Damn, you’ve got a bony elbow on you,” he groused before returning to the previous subject. “I’m serious, what were you saying to the spoiled brat? She looked like she was going to have a seizure of some kind. Dylan and I were taking bets on how long it would take her to melt down.”
“Who won?” Dana asked, glancing up at the devastatingly handsome man who had her tucked so closely against his body. Sweet baby Jesus, he smells good.
“Too close to call.” Ash shrugged. “Plus, we got distracted and lost count when it happened. What did you say to get to her that badly? I mean, she’s a nasty piece of business, but normally she’s just smugly insulting. You actually had her stomping her foot—did you see that?”
Shaking her head, Dana said, “Even I wasn’t brave enough to take my eyes off her long enough to look down. I heard Bart bragging about her finishing college soon. So I might have accidentally praised her for staying in high school despite her advanced age and graduating this year. I also tried my best to reassure her that she was never too old to better herself even if it took her until the age of twenty-five to make it through the twelfth grade.”
In a move that had her swallowing her tongue, Ash roared with laughter. Dana could hear Dylan making a similar sound and figured that Zoe must be bringing him up to speed as well. “Oh, munchkin, you really struck gold. Claudia is far too conceited to have been rattled if you’d insulted something like her appearance. But her education, now that’s a weakness. For all of his bragging, Bart has paid her way through school. I don’t know if she’s dumb or just fucking lazy, but she’d never have made it past the entrance exam without him opening his checkbook. And I know from the digs that Mother Dear has made that it was far from the first time. And that high school diploma you pounced on? She had to go to summer school and still ended up short on credits. I suspect there was some payoff there in the end as well. There’s no way in hell that her transcripts got her into that fancy school, and her intellect sure as hell hasn’t kept her there.”
Dana felt a moment of discomfort at being the mean girl that she’d always despised, but she quickly brushed the thought aside. If she knew Claudia, the other woman would be coming after her with guns blazing. This wasn’t the time to have doubts or back off. The blonde would eat her for dinner without a single regret. No, she was being paid to do a job and that was to save Ash from the unwanted advances of his stepsister. At least if Claudia was focused on her, then she wasn’t likely to maul her brother at the dinner table. This was called taking one for the team and Ash had better damn well appreciate it.
Five
It was like having a front-row seat at a Jerry Springer Show, Ash thought to himself as he watched Claudia glare across the table at his fake girlfriend. When he’d asked Dana to accompany him so that he could enjoy a grope-free evening with the family, he hadn’t expected the entertainment that would come along with her company. The feisty woman at his side pretending to be the love of his life was cool and poised under fire. She appeared to be clueless that Claudia was probably planning her death in some creative fashion. That’s what made the whole thing work so well. He was certain that no one other than Dylan and Zoe would even suspect that this whole thing was an act. He couldn’t swear to it, but his mother’s lips had actually twitched at one point when Dana had asked Claudia what her favorite subject was in school. When his sister had remained silent, Dana had carefully and slowly enunciated her question, “WHAT. DO. YOU. LIKE. BEST? ART. MAYBE?” Her face had been perfectly sweet and innocent, showing not an ounce of deception. Dylan had choked on his wine, and Zoe had clapped him on the back before patting her own chest. Claudia had narrowed her eyes, but otherwise said nothing. Dana had given her a pitying look as if she felt sorry for her. Since then he figured they were all simply waiting for the next outburst and wondering when it was going to happen. Dylan had discreetly flashed five fingers a few minutes ago, indicating his bet, and Ash had acknowledged it and flashed both hands briefly. He’d been trying to keep Dana quiet since then for a while longer so he’d win. But when he felt something move against his leg, he figured the game might have shifted in a new direction.
Directly across the table from him, Claudia gave a smug smile that had his stomach clenching. Then what he now knew was her foot inched dangerously close to the family jewels as he attempted to shift away. Damn, how long is her leg? He couldn’t seem to move backward fast enough to escape her touch. She’d just made contact with his cock when her chair went flying backward, landing with a loud clatter on the floor. There was a moment of dead silence before Bart jumped to his feet and rushed to his clearly dazed daughter’s side. “Princess, what happened? Are you all right? Here, let Daddy pick you up.”
Ash turned to Dylan, muttering, “What the fuck,” under his breath. But instead of his brother, his eyes landed on Dana. She raised her wineglass to him in a silent salute before taking a small sip. All the while a smug smile played around her plump lips as she watched Claudia attempt to strai
ghten her hair back into place. “I think I love you,” Ash declared reverently, and he wasn’t sure he was totally kidding in that moment. “What just happened?”
Dana appeared to glance over to make sure no one was following their conversation before she leaned close and whispered, “Your sister accidentally hit my leg while she was playing footsie with you. I simply waited for her to come within reach again, then I pushed. Granted, I may be a tad stronger than I thought. I was just trying to get her attention, not necessarily break her neck, but it got her off you either way, right?” Flexing a muscle in her arm, she added, “I think that new Zumba class is really paying off.”
Ash couldn’t help it—he started laughing, then tried to tone it down when his mother glared at him. “That was fucking amazing,” he agreed under his breath.
Dylan, having apparently recovered by then, leaned across Zoe to ask, “Did you do that?” Shaking his head no, Ash nodded to Dana. He didn’t miss the look of respect that crossed his brother’s face. He knew that Dylan had carried a grudge for a while over Dana’s interference when he was struggling to build a relationship with Zoe, but he’d gotten past it a while ago. They’d never be hugging buddies, but his brother liked the woman, even though they still argued out of longtime habit. Dylan didn’t even pretend to misunderstand what had led up to their sister ending up on her ass on the floor. “Foot in lap?”
Grimacing, Ash said, “Yeah, same as usual. Instead, she miscalculated one of the times and ended up with Dana.”
Zoe’s shoulders were shaking as she tried to compose herself. Considering Claudia had pulled the same shit with Dylan before, Ash was sure Zoe was thrilled to see a little payback delivered. Claudia was a nasty piece of business, and they’d all had more than enough. If Dana was brave enough to take her on, then Ash was happy to let her. Of course, he’d keep his eye on his sister. Dana had better never make the mistake of underestimating the other woman. Claudia wouldn’t let this kind of embarrassment go. He was actually surprised that she wasn’t making a huge scene right now and demanding Dana’s head on a platter. But strangely enough, she’d yet to make any accusations. Maybe she knew it would require some explanation on her part as well and she preferred to play the innocent where her father was concerned. Ash was certain his mother saw through the act, but she was careful about picking her battles. Ash bit back a grin as Bart led a hobbling Claudia from the room, as if she’d just returned home from a war zone. “Come on, princess, Daddy will take care of you. I had no idea that there was a problem with that chair. We’ll replace the whole set tomorrow. I can’t have my baby getting hurt like that.”