“We were eating dinner last night and we were interrupted by Cassie. Remember her?”
“Yes. And?”
“I introduced Cassie to Lindsay and then Cassie asked me to meet her for drinks later. I said maybe and Cassie left. Lindsay asked me how I knew her and I told her about how we met them. Then our food arrived and Lindsay didn’t eat again. I commented on it and she said she didn’t feel good and left the restaurant. I went to her room but she either wasn’t there or didn’t answer the door. So I waited until this morning to try again. She looked terrible last night, is there something wrong with her?”
“David and Sarah tell me that she is going to be on vacation for a month. They said Las Vegas so I don’t know why she left it.” Dalton said a little confused.
“A month? She is gone for a month?” Nick was astonished. He wanted to go out on a date with her and begin to change their friendship to something more. Nick called her cell phone again after hanging up with Dalton but she didn’t answer again.
Chapter 5
Lindsay’s month was only about half over and Nick was going crazy. He had called her a dozen times and left messages. She never called him back. He sent her emails that were never answered if she even read them.
“Hey” Dalton called to Nick
“Have you heard from her? Where is she?”
“I’m fine. Thanks for asking. And how are you?”
“I would be better if that sister of yours would answer my calls or emails. Where is she?”
Dalton shrugged “All she tells me the few times I have talked to her is that she is fine. She isn’t communicating with me either. My question is why is she not talking to you and why does that mean she won’t talk to me either?”
“What about Sarah? Surely Sarah knows where she is.”
“I don’t think so. If she doesn’t want us to know then we won’t know.”
“Why is she ignoring my emails and phone calls, I just want to talk to her? Tell her that the next time she calls you.” Nick said pointing at Dalton.
“You’ve told me that repeatedly and I have told her that, repeatedly.”
“And what does she say?”
“She usually changes the subject or hangs up on me.”
Nick stalked off to brood some more.
“Nice to see you too, friend.”
Nick waved absently while Dalton laughed at him.
Lindsay let herself into the house late one night about a month later. She hadn’t told her family that she was coming home tonight so they wouldn’t be waiting for her. She had enjoyed her working vacation mostly. She knew the solution to her problem but it was going to break her heart to follow through with the plan. She was going to leave her family, her home and Nick.
Lindsay was quietly walking to her room when David stopped her “Hey stranger. Welcome home.”
Lindsay stopped and turned to him. He walked up to her and hugged her. “Hi big brother.”
“You look rested.”
Lindsay shrugged her shoulders “I hope it wasn’t too inconvenient having me work away from home.”
“We managed.”
“Good. Maybe I can do it again then?” she asked hopefully
“Maybe.” David returned
“I’m tired I’ll see you tomorrow.” Lindsay said as she moved towards her room.
“Night”
Lindsay slept late the next morning. She wanted to make sure everyone had gone before she went to breakfast. Gabby hugged her as she entered the kitchen. They caught up on all the ranch happenings while Gabby fixed her breakfast. Lindsay didn’t care about much of it except the part where Nick was gone to town for a while to get supplies.
She left the kitchen and decided this was her chance to go riding without Nick being in the barn to hinder her. Lindsay was walking toward the tack room when Nick stepped from one of the stalls. He hadn’t seen her yet so she turned around and went back to the house.
Gabby was still in the kitchen when Lindsay entered the house. “I thought you were going riding.” Gabby stated.
“I changed my mind.” Lindsay said quietly as she was leaving the kitchen
“Lindsay, is anything wrong?” Gabby asked
Lindsay paused and quietly said “No” then continued on to the office.
Nick was walking by David’s office later that morning. “When is Lindsay coming home?” Nick asked
“She is home.” David answered
“She is? I haven’t seen her.”
“She got in late last night. Maybe she is sleeping in.”
Nick nodded and left the office. Finally I will have a chance to talk to her.
Lindsay walked down to the barn shortly after lunch. Hopefully Nick is gone to town now. Unfortunately, she was wrong. She was opening the door to Brandy’s stall after retrieving her saddle from the tack room when he approached.
“Hi Lindsay”
“Hi” she said very quietly
“Do you need some help?”
Lindsay shook her head no and didn’t look at him. Please go away she thought to herself.
“Nick!” Nathan called from another stall. “I need your help for a minute.”
“Coming” he said as he walked away.
Lindsay was grateful to Nathan for pulling his son away. She finished saddling her horse and left on her ride. She would miss riding and she wanted to take a ride to the creek. It was a beautiful time of year to enjoy being outdoors.
She hadn’t been there very long when she heard another horse and rider approaching. Nick and his horse came into view a few minutes later. She started back to her horse to leave. Lindsay kept her head down as she mounted her horse. She didn’t speak and she didn’t look at him as she started to ride off.
“Are you going to say anything?” he asked incredulously
“I’m sorry. I didn’t know you were coming out here. I’m leaving.” She said keeping her head tucked and not looking at him.
“That isn’t what I meant.” Nick growled out. Lindsay ignored him and nudged her horse to move on.
“Don’t! Please stay.” Nick said hurriedly as he climbed down.
“Goodbye Nick. I’m sorry for everything.”
“What are you talking about? What are you doing out here?”
“I’ll be gone in a few days. I only came home to pack. If you can just ignore me until then, I’ll hide out in my room and skip meals. You won’t see me, I promise.” she pleaded with him then quietly spoke “I’m sorry.”
“Gone? Where are you going?”
“I’m moving away.”
“What?!”
“Goodbye Nick.” She said as she started to move away again.
“Wait a minute. Why are you acting this way? Why did you ignore my phone calls and emails?”
“Why does it matter now?” she asked quietly
“I don’t know what that means.” He stated.
“David would probably give you the time off if you can’t be here at the same time as me. Goodbye Nick.”
“I don’t get why you are acting this way. Did something happen that I don’t know about?”
“The helicopter ride was enough don’t you think?” Lindsay spoke “I am sorry that I was there where you didn’t want me to be. David thought it would be good if someone you knew was with you. I didn’t know you hated me that bad. If we had to do that day over again, I’d have David ride with you. I’d save you from having to tell me to get away from you, I’d save you from me. I honestly didn’t know you hated me. I’m truly sorry I was there in your way.” She said nudging her horse to leave.
Nick was astonished at what she said. He hadn’t said anything to her, had he? “You actually think I didn’t want you there?”
“I don’t think it, I know it. I remember it. I’m sure my memory of that day is lots better than yours. I reli
ve it every time I think about you and when see someone I thought was my friend. So I am moving away forever just like you wanted.”
“No. I’m sorry. I don’t have any memory of that ride at all so I shouldn’t have said “think”. I don’t know at all what you said to me when I woke up. Tell me.”
Lindsay shook her head and said quietly “It isn’t important anymore.”
“Oh yes it is. Tell me now.” He said strongly.
Lindsay took a deep breath and looked to the sky to stop the tears that threatened. “You started to get agitated and so I leaned over to tell you that you were in a helicopter on the way to the hospital and that you were going to be okay. I thought it would help you relax.”
“And what was my response?”
“You told me to get away from you and leave you alone that you didn’t want me there.”
“Lindsay” he pleaded “I wouldn’t have meant it.”
“I thought so too. So I tried to talk to you again and then you got even more agitated and tried to get up. But you still said it again. So I sat away from you and shut up.”
“What happened then?”
“The flight nurse talked to you and you calmed down and then went back to being unconscious.”
Nick was saddened that she took it that way. “I don’t remember any of that. I’m sorry I hurt you.”
Lindsay started to instruct her horse to move again.
“You don’t believe me do you?” he asked
“No. I am going to be gone soon. Please accept my apology.”
Nick grabbed her reins and put himself in her path “NO! You can’t leave the ranch! This is your home. Your brothers and Sarah are here.” Nick exclaimed then calmed down to explain further “I don’t want you to leave. I never would mean to say that you should leave me alone. You are my family.” Nick stated trying to make her understand. And you mean so much to me.
“Please let me go home. It is best. I can’t stay here, everyone will become embroiled in our battle. Our family would suffer. I will see my brothers and Sarah when they come visit me.”
“And what about Mama and Dad and me?”
Lindsay shook her head no.
“Never?”
“Rarely” was her soft reply “It’s for the best. I’ll time my visits when you aren’t here so you don’t have to see me. It’s what you want.”
“It isn’t what I want.” Nick exclaimed
“I didn’t imagine it Nick, I heard you tell me that you didn’t want me around. I’m trying to do that.”
“Please come down from your horse, we have to talk about this!”
“What would be the point? I’m doing what you want; can’t you be happy with that? I can’t give up anything else for you, it is all gone already.”
Taking a firmer hold on her horse and laying his hand on her leg “Will you listen to me? I’m sorry for what I said in the ambulance. Please believe that. You can’t leave StageWest.”
“Yes, I can and I will. It is best for everyone. No one will ever know the reason, I won’t tell them. Someday though, if you would please tell me the reason, tell me what I did that caused you to - hate me?” Lindsay asked around the huge lump in her throat
“I don’t hate you! You didn’t do anything to me. I don’t know why I said those things to you. I wouldn’t have meant them.”
“You don’t say things you don’t mean Nick.”
“I didn’t mean them. I don’t even remember that day.”
“Then how do you know you didn’t mean them?”
“Because you are my family, we have never been at odds. We have always gotten along.”
“I thought that too.” She replied sadly with the tears running down her face. “But we I mean I was wrong apparently. I am very sad about that.” Lindsay started her horse forward and whispered “I love you Nick. Goodbye”
“Lindsay! Wait!”
Lindsay urged her horse even faster until she was at a fast gallop. She raced back to the barn and asked the first ranch hand that she saw if he would take care of her horse for her. He agreed and Lindsay ran for the house and went directly to her room and locked the door to her suite and her bedroom.
Lindsay collapsed on the bed in tears. Why did I come home? I knew this was a mistake.
It wasn’t long before she could hear someone knocking on her suite door but she didn’t answer it. A few seconds later her cell phone rang, the display showed that it was Nick. She didn’t answer it and turned her phone off.
Lindsay cried off and on for the rest of the day. Someone came and knocked on her door again to announce dinner probably, but she ignored it. She began to look around her room to decide what to pack, what to take with her and what to have shipped to her new home wherever that ended up to be.
Much later that night, Lindsay decided she needed something to eat and then she would go to her office to decide what items in there to pack. She spent a few minutes in the office but most of the stuff would stay at the ranch for the next manager.
Lindsay went back to her room and decided to go to bed, her emotions of the day had taken their toll and she was exhausted. She climbed in bed and turned off the light and amazingly fell asleep quickly.
A short time later, Nick opened Lindsay’s bedroom door and crept in. He moved cautiously to not scare her.
“Lindsay” he said sitting gently on the bed “Wake up.”
Lindsay startled out of her sleep and started to scream and he clamped his hand over her mouth. “It’s Nick.” He said leaning over to turn the light on. “It’s me.” He repeated.
“Get out of my room.”
“No. I have to talk to you. I have been trying all day; I left you a dozen messages.”
“My phone is off, that should have been a hint that I didn’t want to talk to you. Go Away!”
“I am not leaving until you tell me that you aren’t moving away tomorrow.”
“I am not moving away tomorrow.” Lindsay replied too quickly
“That was too easy. I am still not leaving. I need to tell you something.”
“No. It is the middle of the night and I am tired. I can’t take anything else, Nick. I am done. I have nothing left; can’t you just leave me alone? For old times’ sake, can’t you do that one thing for me until I am gone? I won’t be here but a few more days.” She cried pleading with him again.
Nick got up off the bed as Lindsay continued to cry into her pillow. At least he is leaving. She thought. The next thing she knew he was climbing into bed with her.
“What are you doing?” she cried astonished
“Going to sleep. I am not leaving until we talk and since you are tired and I am tired, we are going to sleep. But I don’t trust you so I am not leaving your side.”
“Get Out!”
“No. We will talk in the morning.”
“Why are you doing this? Are you enjoying hurting me this bad?”
Nick grimaced with the anguish in her voice. “My intention is to talk to you, never to hurt you. If you promise to take a ride with me in the morning so we can have a discussion; then I will go home now. Do you promise?”
“You and I do not have anything to discuss.” She said angrily.
She was defensive and hurt, ready to fight at anything he said. He knew that was a sure way to lose her forever so he decided that fighting was not helping his cause, Nick said snuggled up to a pillow “Good night.”
Just like every time she had seen him in recent months, her stomach ached from the anxiety and her heart broke from unrequited feelings “I almost hate you.” She said
“No you don’t, you love me.” He replied offhandedly
Lindsay grabbed her pillow and went to the couch in her sitting room. She lay down and covered up with the blanket that was draped over the back of the couch. She cried for several long minutes until exhaustion claimed her again.
Nick was lying silently in the bed
listening to her cry herself to sleep. I’m sorry Lindsay; I hope you can forgive me after we talk tomorrow.
Nick woke up early the next morning and went to the kitchen to fix some coffee and toast. He wanted them to be gone for their discussion before the rest of the family woke up.
Lindsay was still sleeping when he sat the coffee and toast down on her coffee table next to the couch. “Lindsay, wake up. Get dressed then we can eat and go for our ride.”
Lindsay groaned “I was hoping last night was a dream.”
“No, it is a nightmare. You are so stubborn. This is all your fault.”
“My fault? I…”
“Get dressed or I will haul you down to the stables and throw you over my horse and carry you “dead man” style in your pajamas.”
“You wouldn’t dare.”
“In a heartbeat…. you have two minutes.” Nick said looking at his watch.
Lindsay continued to lie on the couch not giving into his threat.
“One minute. Don’t tempt me, I am mad enough at you to do it.”
“What right do you have to be mad at me?”
“Time’s up.” He said standing to pick her up off the couch
“Put me down or I will scream the house down.”
“Do it and then explain to David why you are being dragged out of your room in your pajamas by me. I’ll tell him you are moving away and then I’ll watch him chain you to the bed until you die. I dare you.”
She gave in at that threat. “Put me down and I’ll get dressed.” Nick put her down and she went to get dressed.
As she came out of her dressing room, he was blocking the door so she couldn’t escape him. She grabbed her hat and stood waiting for him. He clamped his hand around her wrist and opened the door. It was just beginning to be daylight as they left the house but they didn’t go to the barn; instead they went to his house so he could change clothes. “Sit” he growled “If you even think of running away, I will chase you down.”
Nick rushed into his room and changed clothes as rapidly as he could. He kept one ear listening for the door in case she ran again. “It is about time you listen to reason.” He said as he entered the living room again carrying his boots. Lindsay remained silent. “No comment?” he asked sarcastically. Lindsay ignored him.
He finished pulling his boots on and grabbed his hat. As he put it on, he clamped his hand around her wrist again and pulled her to her feet. “Pretend to ignore me all you want, but you will stay with me until you listen to what I have to say. Even if it takes days.”