My life didn’t feel quite so glamorous the next morning, when I woke up to the sound of Mum puking. I crawled out of bed to find her throwing up in the bathroom sink with the door fully open.
I gave her a look of sympathy before making my way to the kitchen to brew myself an espresso. I just about managed to gulp it down before Mum shouted for help.
“Please get me back to bed!” she croaked weakly.
I helped her across the hallway as she held her sore head. “That coffee smelt nice,” she said, looking at me with glazed, bloodshot eyes. “Do you think you could make me one?”
“Won’t you just throw it back up?”
“I’m craving it.”
“Ok then.”
“And toast with blackcurrant jam – I need something sweet.”
“Ok Mum.”
“Two slices and some painkillers. Thanks.”
I helped her into bed before preparing and delivering breakfast to her room. She ate it, threw up again, and fell back to sleep.
Then I looked in on Suki who lay there sleeping contentedly. I got the impression she’d slept through the whole commotion.
I took a quick shower before plastering my face in my best make-up - just in case Nutty showed up. I dressed in my coolest casual outfit – my blue Adidas sweatpants and hoodie.
About an hour passed before I looked in on Suki again. This time, she was wide awake and speaking on her phone. “Yes Mum – I’m fine. I’ll see you in a bit.” She turned to me and grinned. “Was last night a dream?”
“Hope not,” I answered, grinning back.
“Your favourite star!” she said. Despite the fact she’d had such a bad time, she still looked genuinely delighted for me.
I frowned. “Sorry about Mick.”
“I’m fine,” she said. “I’m hoping Nutty might fix me up with one of his famous friends!”
“Maybe!” I answered. “Last night proved you just never know what’s around the corner. Twenty-four hours ago, neither of us had any idea …”
“Amazing, isn’t it?” Suki said sweetly.
“I know! Coffee and toast?”
“Yes please!”
Suki joined me in the kitchen whilst I made breakfast. “Has he texted you yet?” she asked.
“Not yet,” I replied. “Hope he isn’t having second thoughts.”
“I doubt it. He’s totally smitten with you. I could tell.”
“Like a fairy tale, isn’t it?”
“Sure is. Lucky girl!”
The coffee brewed, the toast popped up and we devoured our breakfast with delight. We were just heading toward the lounge when my phone rang – a London number.
“OMG I’m nervous!” I said. “Can you answer it?”
“Don’t be silly!” Suki replied. “Pick it up before it goes to answerphone – he’s probably more nervous than you are.”
I pressed answer with a trembling hand and breathed, “Hello.”
“Hello Mary!” said an old man’s voice on the other end.
“Oh,” I replied. “I think you’ve got the wrong number.”
He read out the number he believed he’d dialled. I hadn’t a clue whether or not it belonged to this dinosaur phone, but it didn’t sound familiar. “Sorry – you must have misdialled,” I said.
“Very sorry to disturb you,” he replied before hanging up.
My hand was shaking so much I dropped the phone. Thankfully, it didn’t break.
Then Mum appeared, shielding her eyes from the daylight. “My head’s still bad,” she said, walking unsteadily into the lounge.
Suki and I followed her. I felt dreadful – that phone call had tied my stomach into knots because I’d really believed it was going to be Nutty.
Mum switched MTV on just as an Eminem tune was ending, and then Nutty Bonkers came on with his Witch Babe video. It was horribly embarrassing watching him grinning at this woman as she wiggled her big butt near his face.
“Nutty!” Suki said, clapping her hands.
“I’m sure I dreamed about him last night,” Mum said. “I had some strange dreams.”
Suki and I burst out laughing.
“He was here!” Suki said.
“How do you know?” Mum asked. “Have I already told you about the dream?”
“It wasn’t a dream – he was actually here Mum.”
“Shut up!” Mum replied. “Stop messing with my mind – I’ve got a headache.”
“He was!” Suki said. “Yazmin and I came in and you’d been drinking and you said there must be drugs in the drink because you could see Nutty standing between us. Then you touched his jacket and collapsed. Then you found his car key and followed him and Yazmin to the carpark. In fact, I have proof.” She grabbed her phone off the coffee table.
I reeled back in horror as she showed Mum the pics of Nutty and I together, water sloshed all down my dress from when Rose had brought me the drink. Nutty looked gorgeous, as always, but the pics of me weren’t too flattering. Oh God, I thought. I look awful. I bet he’s having second thoughts.
“OMG!” Mum said, staring open mouthed at the pictures. “And then you brought him here?”
“Yes,” I said. “When we first walked in you were making up your own daft words to Madman in a Bunny Costume, and he heard you!”
Mum looked horrified. “Oh God,” she said, placing her aching head in her hands. “Not stupid bastard in a straightjacket?”
“That’s the one!”
“I’m mortified!” Mum said, looking as though she was about to start puking again.
“He liked it,” I said reassuringly. “He called you creative for making your own version up – said you can write his next tune with him.”
“Sounds like he was being polite to spare me the embarrassment.”
“He’s in love with Yazmin!” Suki said, placing her hand on her heart. “Dudley introduced them last night. Apparently, she’s his dream girl – he’d seen her in the newspaper.”
“You’re joking!”
“She isn’t. He took my number. I’m really nervous waiting for the call.”
“He’s a famous MC,” Mum said, half laughing. “Probably has at least ten bitches – he’ll get round to you eventually, I guess.”
“Bitches?” I said in shock. “That’s a nice way to refer to your daughter!”
“As I said, he’s an MC. He’s always rapping about bitches and money – you’ve heard his lyrics.”
“Just words!” Suki said. “Yazmin means a lot to him – I could tell.”
“He’s only just met her.”
“Yes, but he really likes her.”
My heart sank down to the basement - four floors below our flat. It was true – he was always rapping about this bitch and that bitch and how much dosh he had in the bank. Was it just lyrics, or would I be one of many? Perhaps Dudley had introduced him to each and every one of them. Just my bloody luck to get with a right bastard, even if I had been in love with him for three years and always wanted to meet him. I began to wonder if I was setting myself up for a truck load of heartache. Would I be ripping his posters from my walls in tears and deleting all his songs off my iPod three months from now? His lyrics about Chanice – the black beauty with the lusciously round butt, and Melanie – the hot redhead with the biggest tits north of the equator, rushed through my head like a bloody underground train. Was he with both bitches at this very moment? I suddenly felt very jealous and horribly sick.
Suki was watching my face. “Not every famous person sleeps around,” she said. “The man’s in love!”
“Just be cautious,” Mum said firmly.
Then my phone rang again. I looked down and saw a name on the screen – Nutty!