At any rate. She lost the bet and I was one happy camper. Because I got to pick her up and take her to Evan’s party.
Just me.
It was something small… like getting a crumb from Demetri’s dinner plate. But I didn’t care. I just liked the fact that I’d get to pretend.
I’d pick her up in my car and pretend she was mine.
I’d open her door and pretend that she was my girlfriend.
And I’d imagine that it would be my lips she’d be kissing at the end of the night. Instead of Demetri’s.
By the time Friday night rolled around, I was a nervous wreck. I was almost late to pick up Nat and felt like a complete ass for making her wait.
I rang the doorbell and waited.
What greeted me on the other side of that door — almost gave me a freaking heart attack at nineteen.
No chance in hell was I letting her leave the house like that.
Words. I needed words. But I honestly couldn’t find anything to say. Pretty sure if I opened my mouth the only thing that would come out would be a pitiful moan or maybe a grunt of appreciation.
I shrugged out of my leather jacket and placed it on her shoulders. “Wow.”
“What?” Her face paled.
Damn it. “It’s just making it worse, how is it making it worse?” I seriously wanted to punch something. How did she make a simple dress look so damn hot?
Nat’s face fell. “I can change.”
“No!” I all but shouted lifting my hands into the air, which caused the jacket to fall off her shoulders. The minute I went to grab it, I grabbed her instead and we were chest-to-chest.
My body ached to touch her. It had been that way for days.
And now that we were touching. I never wanted to stop. It was like getting a taste of something forbidden for the first time. You know it’s wrong but you want it nonetheless.
“You ready to go?” I whispered, my eyes focused on her mouth.
With a quick nod, she stepped back.
I felt the loss of her warmth like a punch to the gut. I was in deeper than I thought.
“Stop lusting over my car, Nat.”
Her expression was pure envy as she took in the SUV. With a chuckle I went to the passenger side and opened the door for her.
“Are you for real?” she blurted.
“What?” Okay, I was seriously confused.
“You opened my door.” She pointed at the open door in shock.
My eyebrows drew together. “How else were you supposed to get in the car?”
She opened her mouth then shut it, then mumbled a ‘never mind’ before crawling into her seat. Okay so the night hadn’t started off on the best foot. I’d openly gaped at her, insulted her apparently by opening her door and now she was staring straight ahead like she was concentrating on some imaginary dust on the dashboard.
If there was ever a time when I regretted not drinking anymore — that was it. I pulled up to Evan’s house, got out of the car and opened her door again. Nat didn’t say anything as she unbuckled her seatbelt, but apparently she wasn’t concentrating as hard as I assumed, because she stumbled right into my arms like she’d been drinking the whole ride there.
“You okay?” I set her to rights and gazed into her brown eyes. She looked… upset?
“Yeah, um…” Her eyes flickered downward as if she was embarrassed to be seen with me, “Just not used to heels, I guess.”
“You made it!” Demetri came up behind me and squeezed Nat’s side, basically pushing me out of the way as that same hand moved lower to her ass. His mouth found her neck. I clenched my fists so tight I felt my knuckles crack.
He winked at me then kissed her neck again. “Damn you look sexy.” His nose dived instantly into her hair as he nuzzled against her like a dog in heat. Demetri was already three sheets to the wind. Well shit. That wasn’t going to go over well with Nat. Maybe she wouldn’t notice? He was practically using her to balance. “Please tell me you’re staying with me tonight?”
I licked my lips and waited for her answer. Maybe she’d say ‘no.’ Maybe she’d reject him. I willed her to say something — anything. Instead, Nat’s eyes met mine — pleaded with mine. What the hell did she want me to do? Intervene?
“Um.” Nat pushed Demetri back a bit. “How much have you had to drink?”
“Enough to feel good, but not so much that I can’t please you later, Babe.” His mouth met hers in another sloppy kiss and I was done.
Curisng under my breath I walked off in search of a corner I could brood in…
I kept my eyes on Nat and Demetri the whole time. He weaved through people, tugging her behind him like she was some sort of little plaything. And then thrust a red cup into her hands.
Don’t drink it, don’t drink it. Shit! I felt like a parent! Demetri should know better.
She took the drink, sniffed it, had a small sip and coughed.
I exhaled in relief, but tensed again when Demetri attacked Nat with his mouth… no he was like, devouring her. For real, clothes were about to go flying if I didn’t step in and do something. I knew my brother and he was going in for the kill. And he was doing it in front of the entire student body.
I had to stop him before he made an ass out of himself. But the minute I took a step forward a girl blocked my view and grabbed me by my leather jacket — laying a sloppy kiss on my mouth.
That’s the thing about being famous. People automatically think you’re a whore. And I was the exact opposite, so when I tasted Jack Daniels on her tongue, I wanted to throw up a bit. Instead, to protect my image, I kissed her softly, set her back on her feet and told her friend to take her home.
She wouldn’t remember a thing in the morning. I, however, was going to have to disinfect my mouth. Then again, it was alcohol; that cleaned things right?
Demetri and Nat were gone. Well shit. All I could do was sit and wait… and pray he wasn’t deflowering the poor thing on the beach — all before I had a chance to tell her how I felt.
CHAPTER NINE
Demetri
GOD, SHE WAS pissing me off. So I took a pill. Big freaking deal! We were at a party and she was seriously starting to kill my buzz with all that crazy talk on the beach. I was over it — I needed someone who could meet me halfway, who knew that when I gave them that ‘look’ it meant I wanted a piece of ass, not a lecture on what I should and shouldn’t be doing with my life.
“I… I need to use the bathroom!” Nat yelled in my ear when we walked back into the house. I shrugged and walked away. Screw her. If I let her think I was upset, she’d crawl back, probably give me sex and then apologize profusely for being so ridiculous. That’s always how it worked, why would she be any different?
Then again, I had had a lot to drink so my brain wasn’t really working very well and I could have sworn my heart slammed against my chest a few times when she was lecturing me, then again it could be dehydration. Shrugging, I went in search of another drink.
“Hey there.” Dark hair, dark eyes, pink lips. Yeah, she’d do.
“Hey to you too.” I murmured pulling her into my arms. “What’s your name?”
“Does it matter?” Her eyebrows arched.
“Hell no.” I attacked her mouth with such force that our teeth clanged together — shit that hurt — her tongue fought against mine. Okay so she was officially the worst kisser on the planet.
But I was drunk.
And horny.
And a bit pissed.
So I kissed her back and imagined it was Nat. I imagined that Nat liked me just the way I was — I imagined I wouldn’t have to change for her when deep down I knew… if I wanted the best — I couldn’t be an ass anymore. I just wasn’t sure which road I wanted to take. Not anymore.
CHAPTER TEN
Alec
IT WAS LIKE watching a car crash. On one side of the room Demetri was attacking a girl, on the other side of the room innocent little Nat was making her way towards Demetri and the slut he was with.<
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Hell. Why did I have to be the mature one? Why did I have to hold her hand while he broke her heart? I wanted to fix it, I wanted to punch my brother in the face but I also wanted to protect him. He liked her — he was just drunk, but how do you explain that to someone like Nat? Someone who’d never seen ugly in the world? Who still believed in Christmas and the freaking tooth fairy? Okay so I was exaggerating, but still.
With a curse, I made my way towards her and blocked her view of Demetri then grabbed her hand.
“Alec.” She jumped in surprise.
“Hey” — I leaned in so people wouldn’t hear us — “Maybe we should go?
Nat’s face softened. “Are you sick?”
Hah! “Something like that.” If sick included wanting to chop my brother’s balls off then yeah call 911.
“Okay, well… um, let me just go talk to Demetri first.”
“Nat, don’t.” I lunged for her hand but she jerked away from me.
“Don’t worry! It will just take a second.”
Yeah, I was going to be witness to Demetri losing his life. And it wasn’t going to be because of drugs.
I chased after her and swore when she froze mid-step and then covered her mouth with her hands. “Nat, stop.” My arms shot out around her and I lifted her into the air, carrying her outside so she didn’t escape but mainly so she wouldn’t crumple to a crying heap on the ground. High schoolers could be lame and the last thing I wanted was for someone to get a picture of her sobbing over Demetri.
Once we reached the car, I unlocked the doors, set her in the seat and buckled her seatbelt. A soft rain started falling against the glass as I started the car and drove off towards her house. My voice gruff, I said, “You can cry now.”
At first I didn’t think she was going to.
Instead, water basically exploded from her beautiful eyes and trailed down those soft cheeks. I felt every one of those tears as if it had been me cheating, as if I was the reason for them. I felt responsible for her pain — just like I felt responsible for Demetri’s.
I stopped in front of the beach house and carried her through the door. Gently, I set her on the couch and went to turn on the lights.
For some reason the light made her cry harder. Great. Maybe it was because she was embarrassed. Shit. I did not know how to deal with crying girls. I mean in theory you’d think I’d be all over it. Girls full on sobbed in front of me on a regular basis, one time a girl choked on her spit so hard she actually puked — all over my favorite shirt.
But, I liked Nat… Helpless, I did the only thing I knew to do. I made tea and got on my phone and ordered pizza. Like a total ass. I went into the kitchen, heated up some water in a mug, and then made her tea that probably tasted just as bad as it looked.
“Here.” I thrust it in her hands. Unsure of what to do next.
“Thank you,” she mumbled.
I knelt in front of her and used my thumbs to wipe the remaining tears from her eyes. “I’m sorry, Nat. He’s drunk. I know that’s no excuse, believe me. But if he was in his right mind he would have never done that. I know he likes you.” There. I’d done my job. I’d defended my brother — even though he didn’t deserve it.
Nat gave a numb nod and huffed. So I tried again.
“Want me to beat him up for you?”
She perked up. “Would you?”
I nodded and smiled,
“Maybe just a black eye.”
“Done.” Carefully, as to not make her cry again, I sat next to her on the couch and listened to the clock tick.
Nat set the mug on the table and started to get up. “I should go home. I mean — it’s getting late.”
“Fine, but if you go home I’m going with you. Your choices are as follows. Stay with me, while I sleep on the floor guarding your virtue from my brother if he decides to track you down, or I’m crashing at your place. It’s not safe for you to stay by yourself, Nat. Your parents are gone, right?” Shit. She couldn’t leave. I didn’t trust her to leave; I didn’t trust her with me or without me.
I ran my fingers through my hair. Nat had a good head on her shoulders, I got that, but leaving her when she was weak, it just reminded me of all those times I’d left Demetri and he’d almost died via an overdose. You don’t bail on someone when he’s at his weakest moment. You hold on for dear life and swear never to let go — even if it means you have to threaten their sorry ass. “Look, I know it’s Seaside and not L.A. I just don’t feel good with you being there by yourself. You should hang here for a while.”
She nodded. “You don’t have to do that, Alec.”
“Yes. I do.” Emotion clogged my throat, I so, so, so, do. “So, what will it be?”
Her eyes darted around the room. “I guess we could stay here.”
“Good, because I already ordered pizza.”
Her laugh was like a punch to the gut. Good, she was laughing. The tears were gone, for now.
“When did you do that?”
“I have my ways. Apparently, there’s an app for that.” I teased.
Nat giggled. “Always is.”
My smile fell. “Are you going to be okay?”
“Of course.” Nat looked down at the mug, her lower lip trembled. At least when she lied she was really, really pretty.
My eyes narrowed.
She must have known she didn’t convince me because she said again, “I’ll be fine. I promise.”
“Says the raccoon,” I muttered under my breath as more black made its way down her face.
“Jerk!” She laughed and playfully pushed me away from her. “I knew I shouldn’t have worn mascara.”
“It’s not like you need it anyways.” I stared hard at those long lashes. Damn, they were beautiful. “You have the thickest dark eyelashes I’ve ever seen. It’s like you’re waving every time you blink. Actually I’d like to think it’s a greeting each time, ‘Hey, Alec. How you doin, Alec?’“
Nat burst out laughing. It was probably the longest conversation we’d ever had and I’d made her laugh twice.
“Oh my gosh! That’s kinda creepy, Alec, and I’m pretty sure every time I see you I’m going to blink even harder, because I’ll be thinking about it, and then people are going to think I have something in my eye.”
“Oh, I hope so.” I grinned and jumped up from the couch, my heart skipping a bit in my chest. “That would be entertaining for me.”
“Yes, and it’s all about you,” she joked.
I turned and offered a warm smile. “No. It’s about you.” It had always been about her. How could she not see that? Everything that I did, everything that Demetri did, it revolved around her.
Nat’s eyes widened, she chewed her lower lip and leaned towards me, I don’t even think she was aware she was doing it. But she was begging me to kiss her. Everything about the way her body leaned, her cheeks flushed, her eyes full of wonder and curiosity. One look at my past and that wonder would be gone, that hero worship? Tarnished. With a dark and sordid life.
“So…” I tried to push down the need to touch her. “Until the pizza gets here, what do you say we play some cards?”
“Cards? You play cards?” Her eyebrows shot up in surprise. What? Did she think I just wrote music and stared at myself in the mirror and clapped or something?
“Um, yeah? What else do you think there is to do on tour busses?”
“Sing?” She offered it as a question.
“I think not.” I sauntered to a drawer and pulled out a deck of cards and a pad of paper. “I take a vow of silence while I’m on the bus, saves my voice.” Besides. Demetri did enough talking for the both of us. Swear he made a guy want to be a mime.
“A vow of silence?” she repeated.
I nodded and winked.
“How exactly does that work?”
Damn she was too cute. I shrugged and lifted my hands into the air.
“Oh, very funny.” She narrowed her eyes and ripped the deck of cards out of my hands. The brief sizzle of her
skin made me catch my breath. “So a vow of silence. So you’re like a monk?”
“Sure.” I smiled. “Just call me Ghandi.” I was so not feeling monk-like tendencies in that moment. Not at all.
“Was he a monk?” she questioned.
“I have no idea. That’s why I’m in school, to learn smart crap like that.”
Nat laughed again, this time her shoulders shook a bit as she visibly relaxed. “So what game are we playing?”
“Go fish,” I said in a serious voice.
“Seriously?”
“Oh, absolutely.” I grinned and reached for the counter top, revealing a giant pack of Swedish Fish. “So, this is how it works, every time a player says ‘go fish,’ you have to literally go fish, but you can’t use your hands.” It was the best game ever. And I’d totally just pulled it out of my ass. I mean, in theory I’d always wondered if it would work since I’d seen it played with Cheerios but now was as good of a time as any to try. Plus, any excuse to see her laugh, any excuse to touch her? Yeah. I’d take it.
“What do I use?” She stared at the bag in my hands.
“Your mouth.” I said it as casual as I could but winked so she’d know it wasn’t serious, when actually, my heart was damn near exploding “And you can’t let your lips touch the counter, it has to be all teeth. Cheaters will be punished.” I would love. To. Punish. Her. Hell, my mind was going to be my worst enemy.
“You’ve played this before?”
“Oh, honey, if this was an Olympic sport I’d have more medals than Phelps.” HAH — lies. Actually, I was good at cards but again, new game, and totally new opponent. Maybe I’d just let her win…
“Crap.” She dealt the cards with ease and went first.
Within ten minutes, Nat had already eaten five Swedish Fish and accidently touched the table with her lips twice. I hated to admit that I was jealous of my own coffee table. But there it was. I was jealous and a little pissed off that her lips touched the table when they wouldn’t come anywhere near mine. Another minute later and her lips were on the table again. Hell yeah that table was going to be kindling come morning.