“But don’t you want him forever?”
“Yes, absolutely. But if it doesn’t happen, I won’t have regrets. Can you say the same if Jude leaves and you never took a chance?”
I liked Jude a lot and that was scary. But she had a point.
“You came to the party with a hot Aussie. Why are you in here helping me put cheese on crackers?”
She’d handed Jude a beer when we walked in, and he’d taken it into the den to mingle with people and stand in front of the fireplace. I was only going to help Mel prepare some snacks before joining him.
“Because you apparently lack creativity when it comes to food and you aren’t preparing anything more appetizing.”
She shoved me on my shoulder. “Get out of here.”
Jude was leaning against a wall, looking casual and sexy, watching a couple of guys bowling with their Wii. It was a small party, maybe a dozen people. Some people from work, some from the band. Others friends of Mel’s I’d never met. Everyone was talking and laughing, cheering on the players, taking sides, then switching sides based on who was winning.
“Do you have one of those?” I asked, pointing to the Wii.
Jude handed me his beer. I took a sip, handed it back.
“Yeah,” he said. “I already lost one tennis match to Boomer. I may be Wii’d out.” He furrowed his brow. “So why did we have to wear bathing suits under our clothes?”
Mel had called and told me that they had something special planned. I knew what it was, but I wanted it to be a surprise for Jude.
“Guess we’ll find out.”
“Aren’t you Miss Mysterious?”
Not usually, but tonight I was feeling good.
“Can’t believe I didn’t ask earlier. How was class?” Jude asked.
“It was fine. Nothing too exciting. I really should be studying.”
He handed the beer back to me. “Don’t think about it. Just relax.”
Nodding, I took a couple more sips, finishing off the beer.
“Come on. I want to build a snowman,” Jude said, taking my hand and leading me through the living room and into the kitchen. I threw the empty bottle into the trash can.
“I’ve heard that before. I think you want to build a snow woman.”
“And this one won’t be in a public park. We could have some fun with her.”
He grabbed a bottle out of an ice chest, popped the top, and handed it to me. Then he reached in and got one for himself. He wrapped his hand around mine again and led me through the door leading outside. The porch light was on, illuminating the backyard, giving it a very Thomas Kinkade feel.
“Oh, look,” Jude said, “a swing on the porch. Let’s sit for a sec.”
“Thought you wanted to build a snowman.”
“Did I?”
“How many beers have you had?”
“Not many.”
“That’s not a number,” I teased.
He dragged me over to the bench swing, sat, and pulled me down beside him. He lifted his arms to yawn, lowered one to the back of the swing, knocking the side of my head in the process.
“Smooth move, Aussie,” I teased.
“God, I’m sorry.” He tucked strands of my hair behind my ear. “You all right?”
“I’m fine. You didn’t hit me that hard.”
He moved in closer, pressed his head to mine. “That’s not what I’m talking about.”
I’d suspected that. He was referring to my earlier conversation with Rick. I’d been putting off talking about it with Jude. I didn’t know why. I’d told Mel, but it just seemed more was at stake with Jude, that it might change things between us.
I sighed, deciding to just get this over with, like pulling a bandage off a scab.
“We broke up a couple of weeks ago. The reason was…how do I put this? Lack of enthusiasm? It was like we were just going through the motions. Today was just…I don’t know. A final confirmation that it’s over between us.”
“Is it not what you wanted?”
I thought about that for a minute. “Actually, it was.”
A heavy silence settled between us. He shifted his gaze away from me and drank his beer. I took another sip from mine and set it aside.
“With the girl you broke up with,” I finally said, “how did you know when it was over?”
He shook his head, still staring ahead. “I don’t know. There were no scenes, no real breakup. We just looked at each other one day and said cheerio.”
“Have you ever been in love?”
“I think so.”
“Was it scary?”
“Not really, no. It was rather nice actually.”
“But it wasn’t the girl you broke up with?”
“No.”
“Did you date her?”
“Not really. It was sort of a strange thing, a little complicated. I’m not sure she ever realized it, what I was feeling.” He glanced back at me. “This thing with Rick, coming to a definite end. Shouldn’t you be crying or something?”
“You’d think, but it seems that I have no tears to shed.”
“How can I comfort you if you’re not crying?”
“Did you want to comfort me?”
“Yeah. I really do.” He set his beer aside and shifted slightly so he was at an angle that gave him a clearer view of me—and gave me one of him. He skimmed his fingers gently along my cheek. I was surprised they were so warm. “I want to kiss you, Lys. I’ve wanted to from the first moment I met you.”
“What? When I pepper sprayed you?”
“All right. Maybe not from the first moment, but pretty soon afterward. Are you all right with that? Or do you need more time?”
I nodded. Shook my head. Answering first one question and then the other. Finally I decided I wasn’t being clear. “I don’t need more time.”
“I want you to know it’s not a pity kiss,” he said very seriously.
“Okay.” I hadn’t thought it would be, but maybe after he left I’d wonder. My chest and heart tightened with that thought. I didn’t want to think about him leaving, was wishing he wouldn’t. He was only here for the winter break. Then he’d be gone and I’d never see him again.
He leaned in and kissed me. His mouth was warmer than his fingers, gentle. It was better than any kiss Rick had ever given me. I so didn’t want to think about Rick. Not tonight. Not now. Maybe never again.
And then all I was thinking about was Jude. I felt his hand at my hip, then his arm came around me and he pulled me onto his lap without ever breaking away from the kiss.
Smooth move, Aussie, I thought.
I wound my arms around his neck, my fingers toying with the autumn-colored strands of his hair.
His kiss was tender and sweet. Everything that I needed at that precise moment. It seemed like he always knew exactly what I needed when I needed it.
“We’ve decided to initiate you into the polar bear club.”
Boomer, Mel, and a couple of the party animals had come out onto the back porch and rudely interrupted what was turning into an incredible kissing session. Mel gave me an apologetic look. The others were smiling gleefully.
Horror swept over Jude’s face as he connected the dots. “Polar bear club? Isn’t that where you jump into a freezing lake? No offense, mate, but you’re mental if you think I’m going to do that.”
“Don’t be a wuss,” I said.
Jude snapped his head around to stare at me. “You’ve done it?”
Truthfully, I’d have preferred to shoo everyone back inside and pick up where Jude and I had left off, but I knew these guys wouldn’t go away until Jude had been dunked.
“Absolutely. I did it the night before I went home for Thanksgiving.”
“But you grew up here. You’re conditioned to the climate. You don’t feel cold the way normal people do.”
“Dude,” Boomer said in a very disappointed tone. “You can’t come to the cold climes and not join our polar bear club. You just can’t, dude.”
“Make me an honorary member.”
“No can do, dude.”
Jude groaned in surrender, throwing up his hands. “All right then. Guess I’m gonna do it.”
We all got our coats and jackets before heading out.
“So where is this lake or river or wherever?” Jude asked.
“We use the university pool,” Boomer said. “It’s one of the few standing bodies of water that doesn’t freeze around here. Zach’s on the swim team. He has a key to the gym so he can practice over winter break.”
“Oh, that doesn’t sound too bad.”
“Oh, it’s bad,” Boomer said.
“Then why do it?”
“Because it’s bad.”
“It’s easier to get warm afterward when you’re inside,” Mel said, looking at me and rolling her eyes.
This little adventure was Boomer’s way of having fun.
“But we need to be quiet going in,” Zach said.
“My entire holiday is about being quiet,” Jude said wryly.
“We’ll go extreme sledding before the week is out,” Boomer said. “You can yell all you want to out there.”
“Extreme sledding?” Jude repeated, nudging his shoulder against mine.
“Can’t explain it. You’ll have to experience it.”
“Okay,” Zach whispered. “Everyone, quiet.”
We were near the gym, standing behind some evergreens. The only people we needed to avoid were the campus cops who periodically patrolled. I suspected over the break they weren’t as diligent.
Zach crept to the back door.
“Can’t believe I’m actually going to dunk my body in freezing water,” Jude said.
“You won’t be alone. I mean, you’ll go first, but then we’ll all join you.”
“You’re all mad, certifiably insane.”
Zach opened the door and made a waving hand motion. We all hurried inside.
We headed to the pool area. It was cool inside. They’d obviously turned the heating off. Zach switched on the pool lights. They created an eerie glow. I hoped Jude didn’t notice the wisps of steam rising from the pool.
Boomer corralled him away from the pool. We all stripped down to our bathing suits.
“The easiest way,” Boomer said, “is just to run and make a flying leap into the deep end.”
He stepped back to give Jude room and it was my first glimpse of him without layered clothing to keep warm. He obviously did a lot of swimming along the coast of Australia. As a matter of fact, the other guys looked vampirish standing next to him. Jude was so bronzed. And so in shape.
He was jerking his hands, kicking his feet the way swimmers did standing on the block, waiting to take their marks.
He looked over at me. “I’m gonna do this.”
I don’t know what possessed me, but I stepped forward and took his hand. “I’ll do it with you. And now that we’re inside you can yell.”
“All right. Let’s do this. On the count of three. One. Two. Three.”
We raced toward the pool, leaped off the ledge—he yelled, I laughed—and splashed into the chlorine depths.
He let go of my hand, his weight taking him farther down, so I surfaced first. He came up sputtering, surprise written all over his face.
“It’s warm!”
“Well, yeah, dude.” Boomer laughed. “Do you think we’re all nuts?” He dove into the pool.
“This isn’t a polar bear club,” Jude said, and I heard the disappointment in his voice.
He was probably the only one among us disappointed when the initiation resulted in us landing in warm water.
“It’s the un-polar bear club,” I said. “Boomer’s crazy joke.”
“Oh, well. At least I got to see you in a bikini, which I certainly didn’t think was going to happen in this kind of weather.” He wiggled his eyebrows. “Nice, by the way.”
“Back at you.” Then I started swimming toward the shallow end of the pool.
Jude quickly caught up with me. I rolled over onto my back, paddling my feet.
“I was willing to jump into freezing water,” he said. “Prepared to do it, actually.”
“That counts.”
“Don’t think I can mark it off my list, though.”
“Was joining a polar bear club on your list?”
“It would have been cool. But this will do until the real thing comes along.”
We were at the shallow end and he stood up and pulled me to him, kissing me as the water lapped around us. I had this horrible thought that he was referring to us with his comment and not the club.
Please don’t let him be talking about us, I thought wildly. Because for me at least, I was beginning to think it was the real thing.
Chapter 11
I sat in class the next morning, trying to focus on the lecture and not on thoughts of Jude.
When Boomer realized that Jude really wanted to be a polar bear, he’d offered to drive the two of them out to Lake Champlain for a quick dip and swim. It was so deep that it didn’t freeze over. Jude had been majorly disappointed that I wasn’t going.
But I needed to make it to class.
He’d had more success convincing me to skip class tomorrow to go extreme sledding. I’d never done that before—skip class. But I’d found someone to take notes for me. It was only one day and I’d make up the work later.
It was today that I didn’t want to have to make up and if I didn’t focus…
I looked more closely at my notes. Several times I’d written “Jude Hawkins” and “Hot Aussie” in the margins of my notes. I was pathetic.
He’d slept in Sheli’s bed again last night. Although he’d started in mine, just holding me close and kissing me until we finally had to say good night and get some sleep. Then he’d moved to the other bed.
Even though we weren’t in the same bed, there was still a coziness to having him in the room.
I wondered if it was possible to really fall for someone as fast as I was falling for Jude. I wanted to do everything with him. I wanted to be with him constantly. I wanted—
“Miss Manning?”
I jerked back to the present and stared at my human genetics professor. “Sir?”
“I was asking your opinion on the material you were supposed to read for today.”
Material I hadn’t read because I’d been at a party. “Uh—”
“Mr. Karkosak?”
The guy two seats over rattled off his opinion as though it carried the weight of a Supreme Court decision.
I never came to class unprepared. I’d just have to stay up later tonight to make up for tomorrow. Because for the first time in my life, I wanted to do something more than I wanted to study.
It was a new and invigorating experience, something I needed to explore.
Something I wanted to explore with Jude.
“Twenty-seven bottles of beer on the wall, twenty-seven bottles of beer…”
Seriously off-key voices filled Boomer’s SUV as we headed to the Vermont back country for a little extreme sledding. Jude had started the song at a hundred bottles.
“Drink one down and wot ’ave you got? Twenty-six bottles of beer on the wall!” he shouted.
I was giggling, laughing so hard that I could barely sing his mutilated version of the song, because he always sang the last line of the refrain as though he was insulted that he couldn’t drink beer legally in Vermont.
Mel was riding shotgun. Jude and I were in the back. Jude was also proudly wearing a polar bear sweatshirt that he’d picked up in a gift shop the day before. He was an official member now, having actually swum in a freezing lake. On the car floor between us was a cooler filled with beer—for when we’d finished sledding.
“You can’t drink and sled,” Boomer had warned Jude. “Because, dude, extreme sledding is tight and you’ve got to stay focused, alert.”
Extreme sledding—or free sledding, as it’s also known—is extremely popular in Vermont since the sport beg
an here several years ago. World News Tonight had even done a short feature on the sport. There were no established trails. Each sledder created his own, searching for the slopes that would give him the momentum he needed to sail through the air, doing stunts.
Boomer turned off the main road and followed a snow-covered trail. He pulled to a stop in what appeared to be an empty clearing. The nice thing about free sledding was that unlike skiing, it didn’t require an actual resort, marked trails, or ski lifts. All we needed was a sled and a mountainous, forested area so we could trudge far up a hill and sled down. And Vermont was filled with mountainous, forested areas.
“Seems kinda warm out here after my experience yesterday,” Jude said, rubbing his gloved hands together after climbing out of the vehicle.
“You’re so proud of being a polar bear,” I teased.
“Absolutely. Wish you could have been there.”
“Maybe next time.”
“I’m not doing that again. Once was enough, thank you very much.”
Quite honestly, I was relieved, because jumping into icy water was not my idea of fun.
The day had turned gray, the promise of more snow hovering in the air. Visibility was still good, though. I figured at the closest resort some of the higher ski trails might be closed due to low visibility or high winds. But again, that was the beauty of extreme sledding. No one could shut us down.
As we gathered at the rear of the SUV, Boomer sprang open the back door.
I reached inside and grabbed my backpack, which I’d filled with protein bars and water. The sport took a lot of energy and there were no little coffee shops around here. I took the radio Boomer gave me and shoved it in the front pocket of my pack.
Jude helped me slip my backpack on before snatching up his own. I could see the excitement in his eyes at the opportunity to try something new, something he’d probably never do in Australia.
“Here we go,” Boomer said, handing me a Mad River Rocket, the official name of the sled.
“Looks like a baby bath fitted with knee pads on top,” Jude said.
Boomer turned one over and ran his gloved hand along the runners on either side of a tunnel. “This creates a monorail as you’re traveling down the slopes,” he explained. “Helps you stay upright and it helps with the steering.”