“God, Sam. Your ass looks perfect up in the air like this, moving against me,” Walker rasped, withdrawing then driving back inside me.
Heat rushed through my body as he quickened his thrusts, bringing me closer to orgasm. His hand left my nape, trailing down my spine and through my hair to grip my hip. Both of his hands dug into my flesh as his cock pounded into me, moving faster. I bit my lip and tried not to cry out but it was useless. I was coming.
Bright white lights exploded behind my eyelids as he reached around my body, finding my clit. I screamed as the orgasm hit me, shaking me with tremors and quakes.
“That’s it, sweetheart. Come all over me,” Walker rumbled, thrusting into me and squeezing the warm flesh of my hips. “God, you’re gripping me so tightly. I’m almost there.”
I thrust my hips back to meet his, burying his manhood deeper in me. He groaned, his hands growing tighter on my hips.
“Condom,” he said, starting to pull out.
I moved my hips back, not letting him escape. “I counted the days. We’re good,” I said in a breathy voice.
He moaned, his length pushing back into me. “Then hold on, sweetheart.”
I peeked over my shoulder as he started thrusting into me faster, his hands going to the cheeks of my bottom. Walker met my eyes over my back. An unspoken message went between us, one that was more serious than what we were doing.
I kept my eyes on him, my head turned, my hair falling across the bed, as he rammed into me. I felt him grow tense, his hands tightening on my hips. Reaching beneath my body, he grabbed my nipple and pulled.
I screamed as an unexpected orgasm hit me. He thrust deep, bottoming out, and let out a roar. I felt a rush of hot liquid deep inside me. A second later, my name slipped past his lips as a tremor shook his body. He stayed buried deep in me, his length throbbing.
Letting go of my bottom, he ran his hands up my spine. “Lay down.”
I lowered my bottom to the bed with him still in me. He followed me down, resting his weight on his elbows, his lower body pressing me into the mattress.
“You’re beautiful, Sam. Every single, amazing, fucking inch of you,” he whispered, leaving a kiss on the edge of my shoulder.
I smiled as he pushed my hair to one side. His lips touched the back of my neck.
“You okay?” he said against my skin.
“Yes,” I said dreamily.
He kissed my shoulder gently. “I want you on the pill, Sam. I plan to come in you again and again. Night after night. Then maybe one day … I don’t know. I’ve never wanted kids but the thought of having them with you would be---”
He stopped. My eyes shot open, shock rolling through me. I glanced over my shoulder, finding him frowning. Keeping his eyes averted, he withdrew from my body.
“What?” I asked, still trying to catch my breath. “Kids with me would be what, Walker?”
He didn’t answer. Instead he rolled away, swinging his legs over the side of the bed and sitting up. His strong muscular back faced me, each muscle cut to perfection.
“What are you doing?” I asked, suddenly panicked as I watched him grab his t-shirt from the floor and pull it on.
“I need to go home,” he said, the words clipped. Cold.
I sat up, grabbing the sheet to cover me. “Just like that you’re leaving?” I asked with disbelief.
“Just like that.”
Anger filled me. “Why? Because you mentioned kids?”
He didn’t answer, just bent over to pick up his jeans. But I saw him clench his jaw hard.
“Stay,” I said, trying to control my temper.
Walker turned to look down at me, his gaze running over my messy hair. “You wanted to play twenty questions earlier, so let’s play twenty questions. Why do you want me to stay, Sam?”
Fury made my words harsh. “Because we just made love. Because we’re together. Your words, not mine.”
Walker smirked, but it held no humor. “Little smartass,” he quipped, zipping up his jeans.
I held the sheet tighter and rose to my knees. He watched me with wariness as he pulled on his boots. I crawled over to the edge of the bed until I was in front of him, trying to maintain my pride but losing.
“Why won’t you stay?” I asked, hating that I sounded whiny.
“Because I don’t. It’s my rule.”
“Break it,” I said. “For me.”
“I can’t,” he said, stepping closer to the bed.
“Why not?” I asked in a whisper, gazing up at him.
He threaded his fingers through my hair, turning my face up to meet his. “Because I’m falling and it’s scaring me.”
A second later, he kissed me, his mouth gentle, giving me all he had.
Then he was gone.
Chapter Thirty–Two
-Walker-
I walked out of Sam’s house before I could change my mind. Leaving her with a kiss and her body flushed from sex was my way of saying goodbye. It had always been my rule – fuck then leave. No pillow talk. No overnight cuddling. And damn sure no breakfast in the morning. But suddenly I wanted it all with Sam. And that spooked me big time.
Sure I had admitted I was falling for her but it wasn’t the truth. I lied. The truth was I had already fallen for her. I loved her. I was just too goddamn chicken to tell her.
But I wanted to. As I lay on top of her, my cock buried in her, I came close to whispering that I loved her. That I wanted to spend the rest of my life with her. That nobody made me feel like she did. Something about her made me want to throw in the towel. Call it quits. Commit my whole life, my entire heart, to just her.
But my past wouldn’t leave well enough alone. It wouldn’t let me forget what kind of man I was. I had stolen and lied. I had lived inside a juvenile detention center for too many of my teenage years, learning things no one should learn. I grew up in a house where a fist was the only form of attention there was. I drank and slept around, unconcerned with who I hurt. Alcohol was my best friend next to Bentley and I didn’t see that changing. I was rotten to the core and there was no saving me. I was reminded of that every hour of every day. I would only destroy those around me over time and I didn’t want to do that to Sam. I didn’t deserve her or her body. And sure as hell didn’t deserve to love her.
When I fucked up and mentioned kids, shock had hit me. Marriage and babies weren’t on my radar. They never had been. I wouldn’t bring a child into my screwed-up world. And be a father? The thought turned my stomach on most days. But lying there next to Sam, seeing the love on her face and the lushness of her body, something happened. I started to consider a future with her.
And then I bailed.
I jogged across Sam’s front lawn, thunder crashing overhead. I wished I could just turn back around and go inside. Kiss her and tell her I lied. That I wanted to break every damn rule there was. I wanted to spend the night with her. This one and every single night in the future. I wanted to feel her against me, watch her breasts rise and fall as she slept. And I wanted to break the biggest rule of them all and admit that I loved her, maybe even ask her to marry me one day.
But I was a damn fool.
Chapter Thirty–Three
-Sam-
After Walker left, I sat in the middle of the bed, still naked. Still feeling the heat of his body on mine. His words echoed in my room, whispering in my ear. He was falling for me. Hell had frozen over and pigs were flying somewhere in the sky. Cole Walker was starting to love me.
A few hours later, I finally fell into a deep sleep, my body aching blissfully. I dreamt of Walker almost immediately. His hands were all over my body, his hardness pressing into me. I moaned, never wanting the dream to end. But then he started whispering to me, telling me he won. Bragging about teaching Bentley how to steal a car.
In my dream, I screamed at him, covering my ears and telling him to shut up. But he didn’t. He kept on whispering, telling me how much he enjoyed ruining me, turning me into my mother. I fought him, refusi
ng to listen. He said he loved me in my dream and I believed him.
Until he slapped me.
“WAKE UP!”
My eyes popped open, darkness filling my vision. I breathed deeply, rattled that the dream had felt so real. But then my cheek started burning and the inside of my mouth felt cut. I tasted blood, a metallic taste that made me ill. It took me a second to realize that it wasn’t a dream. It was reality.
And a monster was standing over me.
I screamed and bolted upright, flinging myself off the bed. I landed in a heap on the floor, jarring my pelvis. Without pausing, I reached for the bat I always kept near the bed but my hands came away empty. It’s gone! Then I remembered - Walker had tossed it somewhere the night he woke me up.
Oh, Jesus! No! No!
I tried to scramble off the floor but a hand smacked me down. All the air left my lungs as the fist landed against my face, throwing me back to the old worn carpet. Before I could recover, the assailant was on me, covering my mouth and nose with a big, meaty hand.
“Ain’t no way to say hello, Sammy,” a voice whispered above me.
Oh, god! Oh, god! Bile entered my throat. I recognized that voice. It was one I wished I could forget.
I started struggling, unable to breathe, frantic to get away. Somewhere outside thunder crashed and a flash of lightning lit up my room, ominous in the night, warning me of bad things to come.
I swung my arm, catching the man in the temple. He grunted and fell sideways, hitting my bedside table and shaking it. As soon as his hand left my mouth, I took a big gulp of air, filling my lungs. I would need it to fight. Feeling stronger, I opened my mouth to scream but his hand slapped down on my mouth and nose again, making my lips cut into my teeth painfully.
I started struggling, feeling suffocated. My body reared up. It was a fight or flight reaction and I wanted to do both. My brain was screaming for oxygen and my lungs were bursting the longer he cut off my air.
The man above me snickered and held me down firmly, pinching my nose and smashing my lips into my teeth. I realized that he was enjoying this but I couldn’t stop fighting. I had to get away.
I tried to kick out at him but his upper body was too heavy on mine. I glanced around frantically, searching for a weapon. Black dots started appearing in the corners of my vision as the pressure on my nose and mouth increased.
“I need a damn light,” my captor said with impatience. “I want to see what I’m about to do.”
I felt him reach up, rummaging around my nightstand and knocking stuff over. I fought to get away, but he wasn’t letting me go that easily.
“Stay still, Sammy,” he said, planting a knee in my stomach and leaning toward my nightstand, knocking my cell phone off this time.
I reached for it but he grabbed it first and tossed it across the room. I cried out in protest under his hand and started struggling more, feeling desperate and even more frantic to get away.
His knee dug into my abdomen, pushing against my ribs. I grunted in pain as he put all his weight on me. I heard a small click and the room was washed in the soft glow of my lamp. For a moment, I was blinded, but when my eyes adjusted I finally saw my attacker.
Pam Man.
All the blood left my face. His eyes were glassy, frenzied, and wild. He was looking at me with feverish hunger, his crazed gaze riveted on the outline of my breasts under the white t-shirt. “Hello, cupcake,” he said, smiling a toothy grin.
I started bucking against him with terror, but he held me down like it was nothing.
“Now, I really want to remove my hand from your mouth so you can take big deep breaths of clean, white trash air, but I don’t know if I can trust you. Can I?” he asked in a singsong voice.
I nodded, hoping he’d believe me.
“Good.” Mick removed his hand slowly, letting it trace down over my collarbone. I shivered but stayed still, waiting for the right moment to bolt.
“Now, we’re going to have ourselves a little party,” he said, pressing me into the floor. “I already took a few hits of weed. Now it’s time to take a few hits of you. You owe me.” His hand pushed between us, finding the hem of my shirt.
I screamed, wasting all the precious air I had dragged into my lungs.
Pam Man’s fist clipped me again, this time catching my jaw. The hit dazed me for a second, making the room spin. But my vision cleared quickly when I felt his hand on my stomach, pushing my t-shirt out of the way.
I started to shake. I was tough, but this was outside my realm. I couldn’t win. But I refused to give up.
He moved his hand higher, leaving my stomach exposed to the air. I swung my arm, catching him in the gut. He grunted and grabbed my wrist, slamming it to the floor beside my head.
“You just don’t get it, do you?” he giggled, leaning closer to my face. Spittle landed on my cheeks and nose, causing me to cringe. “I’ve been wanting you since you were little but your brother and that asshole always stopped me. So I bided my time. Then low and behold, who walks into my precinct? Your brother! Held for charges that would put his sorry ass in prison for a long time.”
He glanced down at my chest, rising up and down from the exertion of fighting him. “You see, Sammy, I got my fingers in just about everything around here. I know what goes on around this town. I know who has the goods and who wants them. I’ve been working with the man your brother stole that car from – Morrow - and the men that your brother works for. I’m playing both sides, babe. I give them protection. They give me what drugs I need. I keep the cops out of their business and they keep me supplied. Sounds like a good setup, huh? But there was still something missing.” He poked my chest, a smile spreading across his face. “You.”
I shook my head, refusing to listen.
“But I saw my opportunity.” He shrugged, looking happy. “I got the charges dropped on your brother, which wasn’t easy. Took a lot of cash. Police are greedy, in case you didn’t know.” His gaze drifted down my body, taking his time. “So now you owe me for saving your brother and it’s time to collect.”
“I don’t owe you anything,” I spit, trying to wrangle my arms away from him.
He laughed, “Oh, I think you do, cupcake.” He tapped his chin, thinking. “I tell you what. Let’s up the stakes. I want that Lotus Bentley stole. Cops returned it to Morrow before I could get my hands on what’s hidden inside. Drugs, Sammy. High-dollar shit. I want it and you know just the thug to get it.”
I shook my head. No way would I give up Walker again. I had done it once and had regretted it my whole life.
“Tsk, tsk,” Mick scolded, watching me shake my head. “You forget that with just one phone call, I can have your brother arrested again. Only this time he would go to the slammer for good because I’ve got some major shit on him.”
I tried to kick him but he ignored me, tilting his head to the side and thinking. “Come to think of it, I could have your thug arrested too. I’m sure there’s something I can plant on him.” Mick smiled smugly. “I saw him leave here, you know. I’ve been watching you. I’ve seen you two together. If he doesn’t do this for me, I’ll put him away, and believe me I’m dying to. Then I’ll have you aaall to myself.”
Tears filled my eyes, recalling that this was the same predicament that had made Walker hate me all those years ago. Now here I was again, willing to give him up for my brother.
“You’re a dirty, underhanded pig,” I hissed, blinking the tears away. “Someone needs to string you up.”
“I’m untouchable, baby doll.” He smiled. "Speaking of touching…”
I yelped as he dipped his head down and kissed my neck, leaving a slobbering mess behind. I tried to pull away but he grabbed a fistful of my hair and yanked, pressing his lower body into mine, showing me just what he wanted to do.
I screamed and he let go of my hair, covering my mouth and nose again. My cheekbone and jaw ached from where he had hit me, causing the pain in my head to triple. My throat was burning and my lungs were bursti
ng but I still struggled under him.
He gave up trying to get his hand under my shirt. Shifting his weight, he reached down between my legs.
“That asshole been in here?” he asked roughly, holding me down and trying to get his fingers between my thighs. “Gotta say I’m jealous but I’ll remedy that real soon.”
A sob broke from me, muted behind his hand. I bucked my body to throw him off. When they didn’t work, I pressed my legs together and tensed my muscles so he couldn’t touch me, but it wasn’t working either. He was too strong. Tears ran down my face, soaking the carpet beneath me. I would be unclean if he touched me. Dirty. Touched by the same filth that had ruined my mother and this city.
I turned my head away, and squeezed my eyes shut, unable to deal with what was about to happen. From beneath Pam Man’s hand, I whispered a prayer, hoping for the first time in my life God would answer it. When he shifted off me, rooting around for his zipper, I forced my eyes open, something urging me to. My gaze landed on a dark shadow under my bed, something I hadn’t noticed before.
My bat.
With a burst of energy, I shot my arm out. My fingers brushed against the wood, making it roll away from me.
NO!
Pam Man glanced. “Hey! What are you doing…” he sputtered.
With a sob and a surge of power, I propelled my upper body to the side, giving me just enough leverage to grab the bat. In seconds I had it in my fist. The wood scraped against the metal rungs of the bed as I grasped it and swung.
The bat connected with Pam Man’s head, right over his ear. He roared with pain and fell off me, clutching the side of his head, dazed.
I shot off the floor, jumping to my feet, the bat gripped tightly in my fist. My face throbbed from where he hit me but I couldn’t stop to access the damage. I had to get out of there.
Without looking back, I raced out of the room, slamming the bedroom door behind me. Anything to slow Pam Man down. My bare feet sounded loud on the old floor as I ran down the dark hallway, tripping once on some of my mom’s dirty, discarded lingerie. I could hear Pam Man following me at a slower pace, calling my name.