Kouji entered his father’s make-shift room on one the highest floor of the company building. Perhaps he would be able to spend time with his father without his brother being there to steal most of his attention. He remembered well the message his father tried to give to him last time; to actually be a compassionate human being. Although a good lesson, it was a lesson that he hated for if he had to learn how to have compassion then it must have meant that he was a horrible person and that bothered him.
It bothered him a lot.
Who was that man to tell him what kind of person he was when he hadn’t spent much time with him? The man demanded compassion yet put the business before him and his brother. Nightmares or no Nightmares – whatever the heck they actually are.
The metaphorical rug had been pulled underneath his feet because now he felt like he didn’t know anything about the world and himself. Keys, Reapers, Nightmares, and on top of that he didn’t know who he was as a person. Kouji had woken up to discover that he’s not the kind of man that a man should actually be. He grew up believing that men had to be like his father; strong and stoic but now he had many things to think about if he had to grow to become a better person.
But, in the end I’ve decided that it’s not worth it if restoring Shibuya means hurting more people in the long run. Is that the right decision?
There were many conflicting feelings swirling around within him, making him confused then that confusion had turned to frustration and was now slowly turning into anger.
Kouji could imagine his mother; the strong, independent woman who worked for the Yakuza, ‘It’s unsightly to be angry Kouji.’ He imagined her saying, and perhaps she would be right. What was there to be angry about?
Katou, the girl he had encountered in his school’s basement was what he had to be angry about. Kouji stopped in the middle of the room, covering his mouth as sadness swept over him. The girl... Oh my God the girl... We need to find Akira and eliminate him. With him gone people like her won’t have to suffer anymore. But I can’t... I’m not strong enough and I don’t know where to find that strength.
If I were stronger then that girl wouldn’t have died. She wouldn’t have... I can’t give up can I? Perhaps... Perhaps by teaming up with Kioshi, Hido, Miyako and Aki... Perhaps there is strength there. In friendship.
‘What are you doing?’ His brother asked.
Kouji’s hands slid from his face then he turned to face Hisashi who was sat in the corner, legs crossed with a book in one hand, all together appearing older than he was. Years of mature-thinking had made Hisashi a man in a boys body.
‘It’s none of your business. What are you doing?’
‘What does it look like?’ Hisashi returned to his book. ‘Someone has to look after father.’
Kouji folded his arm, transferring his weight onto one leg then looking down on him. ‘What does that mean?’
‘You know what it means.’
‘And you should know what a rhetorical question is little brother. It looks like you still have some learning to do.’
‘Cute.’
‘Cute?’
‘You’re quarrelling with someone younger than you.’
‘You’re fourteen. Hardly a child I would think.’
Hisashi looked up from his book, relaxing his posture. A smile stretched across his face. ‘Yes Kouji, I’m fourteen and yet I’m better than you.’
Kouji’s eyes narrowed. ‘What did you say?’
‘Look at the evidence big brother.’ He stood. ‘My grades are better than yours when you were my age and better than yours now.’ Now he made his way across the room. ‘I’m recognised by officials and people so important that you don’t even know about. And best of all,’ Hisashi positioned himself right up close to Kouji, ‘this company will be mine when father dies while you’ll be off chasing a fairy tale.’
Kouji’s eyes narrowed, remember that his father had said that when he died his younger brother Hisashi would take over the official business of the company while Kouji managed a part that from what he saw didn’t even exist. Does he take me for a fool!?
Kouji thought of two ways for him to handle his brother’s attitude. In his head he played out each scenario.
‘People so important that I don’t even know about? You’re talking about Yamamoto Akira aren’t you?’ He smiles.
Hisashi was taken aback. ‘H-How do you know about Mr Yamamoto?’
‘I have my ways. Remember you brat, I’m older than you and know more than you. Living in this world is more than about intelligence. There are other factors you have to consider to be... in a word you’d recognise, successful.’ He folded his arms. ‘I’m in the midst of beginning a change to how things are going to be like. And in this world there won’t be any place for people like Akira and for people as narrow-sighted as you.’
Instead a nagging in the back of his mind was amplifying his anger with every passing second. Hisashi’s ego had long been a trait that made caring for him an unbearable task for as soon as he realised his potential and importance to their father he had begun to change for the worse, evolving into the person attempting to stand toe-to-toe with Kouji as if he had something to prove.
Without warning Kouji punched Hisashi with such conviction that he knocked him down and with the first strike his anger had had the taste of realisation and the second punch came out easier, and the one after that and the one after that. Again and again Kouji brought his fist down until his brother was bleeding from his nose and mouth and his eyes were purple protrusions the size of golf balls. But then for a split second Katou flash before his eyes and his readied fist flinched. ‘What am I doing?’
On the floor Hisashi whimpered, twitching every few seconds as he fought unconsciousness.
‘That’s not the kind of man I am. It’s not the person I want to be...’
‘You’ve proven to yourself that this is the person you are.’
Kouji turned, the new girl Yamamoto Ayumi stood before him, arms folded with a wide smirk on her face.
‘Wait, how did you get here?’ Kouji asked, puzzled.
‘The question is, Kouji, how did you get here?’ Ayumi strode across the room, crouching by Hisashi. ‘Say, give him one more for me please?’ Kouji reached down, picking her up by the wrist and hauling her up. ‘Are you going to hit me too big boy?’
‘Stop acting as if you know me!’
‘I do know you, Kouij. You stop beating your younger brother to death, claiming that that’s not the person you are but you’ve already demonstrated that this is the lengths you’ll go to to make yourself feel good, just like that boy who murdered that girl who is constantly on your mind. What will stop you from murdering if it pleases you?’
‘I’m not a murderer!’
Ayumi looked Kouji right into Kouji with large, grey eyes. ‘The way I see it is that the boy is nearly dead already. You’re rich so I’m sure you could get away with it. Go on, vent out that frustration. You know you want to, it’s who you are.’
‘Shut up!’ Kouji wrapped his hands around her neck. ‘SHUT UP!’
‘Or perhaps you want to hurt me just like that girl?’
‘ARGH!’ Kouji roared, forcing his mouth shut but baring his gritted teeth. His grip relaxed by a fraction and his eyes turned to the bleeding boy at his feet.