The rich, beautiful, unforgettable life.
KEITH AND LISA WERE DRIVING ACROSS country, stunned at the speed in which God had helped them wrap up details back in San Jose. They’d listed their house the day after Dayne Matthews had called, and the next day they heard from a couple at church about a family who needed a house to rent. They worked out all the details and would either sell their house later or continue to rent it out. Dayne had been kind enough to agree to take on a few of the meetings for Jeremiah Productions so Keith could drive out to Indiana with Lisa. When Keith and Lisa traveled back to LA, they would stay in the leased beach house with the Matthews family. God was helping them to work it all out.
Chase and Kelly and several families from church had helped them pack and load up the moving van, and now they were only a day’s drive from Bloomington. Keith glanced at his wife, asleep beside him. He focused on the road and remembered the way Chase stayed around, helping until the very end.
Kelly was talking to Lisa in the house when Keith and his friend loaded the last few boxes. Chase dusted off his hands and stood back, looking at Keith. “I guess I still can’t believe it. We dreamed about making movies together for so long.”
It only figured that the reality was bound to hit Chase eventually. He’d made his decision based on God’s leading, but the changes had happened so fast, there’d been almost no time to acknowledge all they were losing along the way. Keith came closer and patted his friend’s shoulder. “We were good together.”
“We were.”
Keith wasn’t sure what to say. This was a more final good-bye than they’d first expected. He’d be in Bloomington or in LA, but he and Lisa would have no reason to return to San Jose. It could be a very long time before their two families were together once more. Before Keith and Chase shared a moment like this again. “How’s it going?” He grinned at Chase in the waning afternoon light. “The youth pastor job?”
“I think I’m going to love it.” Chase shrugged. “I’m already learning so much about the kids.”
“The church kids or yours?” Keith’s question was pointed, filled with a depth of understanding. He wanted Chase to know just how fully his decision made sense to him.
“Both. I know Molly’s favorite songs now, and how Macy likes her pancakes smothered in peanut butter.” He chuckled. “No danger of them forgetting my voice now. We sing together every morning.”
Keith nodded slowly. He would miss this friend. They’d been together through so much—the years of mission work, the season of dreaming about making movies, and their push through the maze of Hollywood. “You made the right choice. Really.”
“I know.” His voice caught in his throat. He hesitated, then he hugged Keith hard, holding him for a long time before letting go. “I’ll miss you, buddy. As right as this choice is, I want you to know I’ll miss you.”
Now Keith stared at the road ahead. He was glad for that final scene, the chance to have closure with Chase. There was no undoing all they’d been through. The memories would last, even as they moved into this next season of life. As they did, Keith would pray for his friend, the same way he was sure Chase would pray for him.
Beside him, Lisa stirred and blinked her eyes open. “Mmmm. That was a good nap.”
“For me too.” He smiled at her.
“Want me to drive?” Her eyes were apologetic. “I haven’t really done my share.”
Keith laughed. “You haven’t driven.”
“That’s what I mean.”
“Don’t worry about it.” He patted her knee. “It’s enough having you with me.” The truck was a twenty-four-footer, and they were pulling their family sedan behind them. Lisa was nervous about driving the rig, and Keith didn’t blame her. “Have you heard from Andi?”
“This morning. She knows we’ll be there tomorrow.” Worry creased Lisa’s forehead. “I asked her how she was doing, like I always do. She says she’s fine, but she’s not. I think she’s worried about something.”
“Maybe it’s her grades. Did you ask how she finished?”
“Mostly A’s, a few B’s—at least as far as she can tell.” Lisa looked out the window, quiet for a while. “I keep wondering if she could be depressed.” She turned back to Keith. “That happens to college kids sometimes.”
“I don’t know.” He kept his eyes on the road. “Andi’s always been one of the happiest kids I know. Her smile’s the first thing people notice about her.”
“Before.” Lisa’s voice was proof of her heavy heart for their daughter. “It’s like she’s a different person. This move is the best thing we could’ve done. I can’t get there soon enough.”
“Every time I pray for her, I feel an urgency. Like she’s not telling us something.”
“I feel it too.”
Frustration welled up inside Keith. “It makes me wish we were closer. I feel so helpless out here on the road. Like maybe she needs us now. Today.” He reached for Lisa’s hand. “I want to help her, however I can.”
They rode in silence for a minute or so. “There’s one thing we can do.”
Keith nodded. His wife was right. There was nothing small or limiting about praying for their daughter. It was the one thing they could most certainly do for her. Keith drew a long breath. “Dear Lord, You know our Andi. You know what she’s going through and why she doesn’t sound like herself lately. We ask that even this very minute You might be with her. Comfort her and remind her of the truth. Place people in her path who will point her back to You. In Your name, amen.”
“Amen.”
They stayed quiet after that. There wasn’t much to say where Andi was concerned. Not until they saw her in person and figured out what was going on, why she sounded so different. In the meantime, they needed to keep praying.
The urgency in Keith’s heart was constant proof.
Fourteen
ASHLEY STILL HAD AN HOUR BEFORE the appointment at Sarah’s House.
This would be the perfect day to take Janessa by the Sunset Hills Adult Care Home. She hadn’t been by the old place in far too long. Only Burt and Helen remained from among the Alzheimer’s patients Ashley had once cared for at the four-bedroom assisted living home. Her favorite patient had been Irvel, a gentle woman who had cared very much for Ashley. It was Irvel who had commented so often about Ashley’s hair, how beautiful it was. Ashley smiled at the memory. The kind woman’s comments weren’t so much because Ashley’s hair was really all that beautiful. But because Irvel wanted something kind to say, and the comment about her hair always seemed to be the first thing that came to her mind. Five times an hour, most days.
The stop at Sunset Hills was just what Ashley needed. Burt was doing better than ever. He seemed to remember her, and Ashley introduced him to Janessa. She was shy around the older people, but she waved her fingers at Burt and he did the same in return, tears filling his eyes. Babies were a rarity at Sunset Hills.
Helen was awake too. She had a scowl on her face as Ashley entered the kitchen, and she was complaining about something swimming in her coffee. The girl working that morning gave Ashley a knowing look. Nothing was swimming in Helen’s coffee.
Ashley introduced herself, and the girl did the same. “Helen has her good days,” she told Ashley when they were in the next room. “She loves when her daughter stops by.”
“Her daughter?” Ashley’s heart leapt at the news. “She still remembers her?”
“Yes.” The girl smiled. “Her name’s Sue.”
“I know. I…I’ve met her several times.” There was no point rehashing the story of how Sue had come to see her mother for years, and how always Helen would yell at her to leave, not believing she was really Sue, and demanding to know what the middleaged woman had done with her real daughter.
Not until Ashley finally understood that Helen was expecting Sue to be a teenager still, were they able to gently, carefully bridge the gap between Helen’s memory and the reality. Ashley had been there the day the breakthrough happened,
when Helen finally understood that her daughter Sue was, in fact, a middleaged woman now. That Helen still remembered Sue was enough to make Ashley’s day. She stopped in the kitchen before she left and bid Helen good-bye. Janessa did the same.
Helen shook her head, her face a mask of disgust. “Your baby’s pretty.” She jerked her thumb toward her coffee. “But there’s something swimming in my drink. No one will help me.”
“I’ll help you.” The girl on duty walked up with a fresh cup of coffee. She replaced the perfectly fine one and smiled at Helen. “There you go. Nothing swimming.”
Ashley was glad Cole wasn’t with them. Her son would’ve inevitably launched into a talk about his tadpoles, and how they were swimming in their fishbowl. That would’ve really put Helen over the edge. Ashley thanked the girl for letting her and Janessa stop in. She said a final farewell to Burt and the two of them were on their way.
She reached Sarah’s House well before the appointment. Janessa toddled around the waiting area while Ashley went over the notes in the schedule book. Brooke had written in the margins that she suspected an abortion was in order for the girl about to come in. She’d given her age as nineteen, and her name as Andi. Whether that was her real name or not, Ashley couldn’t be sure. Many girls facing a crisis pregnancy were reluctant to share their real identity.
In the time left, she and Janessa sat at a table and colored. Janessa was just starting to like drawing, and her pictures were still faint and unrecognizable. But Ashley wondered whether her daughter might follow in her footsteps, maybe become an artist creating memorable designs on canvas someday.
They were still sitting together coloring a picture of a rainbow and a flower when the front door opened. Ashley stood, but before she could welcome the young woman standing out front, she felt her breath catch in her throat. She knew this girl. She’d seen her before—on the set of the movie filmed in Bloomington last year. This was the producer’s daughter, right?
“Andi?”
Fear iced the girl’s expression and she shook her head, taking a single step back. “I’m…I’m afraid I have the wrong…”
“Andi.” Ashley tried to still her pounding heart. The girl obviously recognized her too. “It’s okay. Our work here is confidential.”
Andi’s face had lost color. She looked like she might be sick, but she took a slow step forward and clutched her purse to her stomach. “You…you know Bailey Flanigan, right?”
“I do.” Ashley wasn’t sure how much to tell her. The less, the better. She racked her mind, trying to remember what she knew about the producer’s daughter. Her parents had been missionaries in Indonesia. That much she remembered. If the girl was pregnant now, then no wonder she looked terrified. “I met you on the movie set last summer.”
Andi nodded, and again she looked like she might pass out. Janessa jumped up from the table then and ran to the girl. The toddler stopped short and flashed her a grin, then she waved.
“Hi!”
“Hi.” Andi sat down primly on the edge of a waiting room chair.
“Mama!” Janessa turned suddenly shy and ran, giggling, into Ashley’s arms. Ashley lifted her up onto her hip. She pulled the pacifier from her diaper bag and handed it to Janessa. Her daughter stuck it in her mouth and instantly cradled her head against Ashley’s shoulder. “It’s almost naptime.” Ashley smiled at Andi. “She’ll be asleep in a few minutes.”
Andi didn’t look interested. She kept her eyes on her lap and nodded absently. “No one…” she lifted her eyes to Ashley. “No one knows about this. I don’t want anyone to know.”
“I understand.” She came slowly toward Andi and took the chair opposite her. Janessa stayed quiet, her head still on Ashley’s shoulder. “This is a crisis pregnancy center, Andi. Do you know what that is?”
“I read the ad.” She ran her tongue over her lower lip. Clearly she was scared to death. “You give free ultrasounds. I know that.”
“We’re a Christian center.” Ashley wanted to be kind, but she also wanted to be very clear. “Our goal is to show you the truth, that your unborn baby is a very real little person, a life. From there we pray that every frightened girl like yourself who comes through the door might make a decision to go through with her pregnancy. Whether she gives up her baby for adoption or chooses to raise the baby herself.”
Andi’s shoulders tensed up. She covered her face with one hand and waited a long time before she looked up again. “I…I’m not sure what to do.” A number of emotions flickered across her face—frustration and anger, and most of all, desperation. “Do you know my parents?”
“I met them briefly, but I don’t know them.” She handed Andi a clipboard. “Here. We need you to fill this out before the ultrasound, okay?”
The girl still looked like she might bolt. But she took the paperwork and a pen and quietly filled out the form. There was so much Ashley wanted to say. She had her own story to share, her own personal understanding of the value of life. But right now Andi wouldn’t hear her anyway. She was too caught up in the nightmare happening to her. Ashley tried another tactic instead.
Andi handed the paperwork back, and Ashley looked it over. “Are you ready for the ultrasound?”
“Yes, please.” She looked like she might run out of the center at any moment. “I need to know how…how far along I am.”
Ashley knew what that might mean. Abortion clinics would want that information, and testing at other clinics wouldn’t be free. If Andi hadn’t planned on getting pregnant, she probably had no idea how many weeks pregnant she was. She stood and smiled at Andi, willing the girl to feel safe and protected. “Follow me. We’ll get started, okay?”
Ashley led her to a changing room and told her she could leave on her jeans as long as she unzipped them. “Put the gown on open in the front, and tie it loosely. I’ll meet you in the examination room.”
Andi was shaking, so scared she seemed barely able to move, let alone respond. Ashley was still holding Janessa, who had fallen asleep. There was a crib in the exam room, so she laid her daughter there and turned on the ultrasound machine. The whole time her heart broke for Andi and the decisions she was facing. Dear God, this is why we opened the center. For girls like Andi. Please, Father, let Your Spirit fill this room. Let her feel Your supernatural peace so that she can truly grasp the reality of the life inside her, so she can hear the words You give me to say. I can’t do this, Lord. This is beyond me. Please spare this little one. Both the baby and the precious young mother.
You will not have to fight this battle, my daughter. Stand firm and see the deliverance I will give you.
Ashley felt the response soothe the wrinkles in her soul. Thank You, God. I will stand firm. Help me stand firm. She loved the picture the Lord had given her. Ashley was a fighter—she always had been. But in a time like this, the battle wasn’t hers. It was God’s alone. The reality eased her anxiety and helped her know that the Lord was in control.
Andi knocked on the door, and Ashley opened it. The machine was warmed up and ready. “Lie down on the table. Try to get comfortable.” Ashley remembered the music. A donor had given them a portable stereo system with six CDs of calming Christian songs, music by Jeremy Camp and Matthew West, Britt Nicole and Mandisa and NewSong. Music about life and peace and hope and grace. While Andi eased herself up onto the table, Ashley hit the Play button and adjusted the volume.
The gentle refrains of Mandisa’s song “Voice of a Savior” quietly filled the room.
Andi sniffed, and a single tear slid down the side of her face. “I love this song.”
“Me too.” Ashley smiled. She checked once more on Janessa asleep in the crib across the room. Then she returned to Andi’s side. Already the girl had pushed her jeans down and exposed her stomach. Ashley took a bottle of warm gel and dispensed enough across Andi’s belly for the machine to work. “This won’t take long.”
In the lobby, she heard the sound of the door opening again. A retired nurse worked the day shift a
t the front desk. The door to the examination room was still open. “Is that you, Betty?”
“It is. You’re working with the first appointment?”
Ashley turned compassionate eyes to the college girl on the table. “Yes. We’re just getting started.”
Betty appeared at the door with a clipboard. She wasn’t trained in ultrasounds, but she would register the results. She stood a few feet away and waited.
Ashley took the wand of the machine and began working it slowly across Andi’s stomach. The machine made a series of sounds, and in no time she settled the probe over an area just beneath Andi’s belly button. At the same time, a rhythmic wooshing sound filled the room, pulsing in an unmistakable pattern.
Andi drew a soft gasp. “That’s…”
“The baby’s heartbeat.” Ashley never tired of this, catching the first sounds of new life. Tears gathered in her eyes, but she blinked them away, smiling. “Your baby’s heart sounds very healthy, Andi.”
The girl craned her neck forward, peering at the screen. “Can I see it?”
Ashley adjusted the probe a little more until a tiny pulsating picture could be seen at the center of the screen. “There it is.” She pointed to the image. “That’s your baby’s heart.” She moved her finger along a curved area adjacent to the baby’s beating heart. “That’s the spine. Can you see that?”
“Yes. I…I didn’t think it would be so clear.”
“It is. Your baby’s a little miracle. Already growing and becoming.” Ashley kept her tone kind and tender. The music added to the emotion of the moment and she thanked God again for the wonder of the ultrasound machine. Anyone could tell a pregnant woman her body contained nothing more than a mass of tissues. But ultrasounds were different. The pictures, the sounds…the images didn’t lie. A baby was growing inside Andi, no question.