Read The Awakening and Selected Short Fiction Page 21


  “There is Bobinôt looking for you. You are going to set poor Bobinôt crazy. You’ll marry him some day; hein, Calixta?”

  “I don’t say no, me,” she replied, striving to withdraw her hand, which he held more firmly for the attempt.

  “But come, Calixta; you know you said you would go back to Assumption, just to spite them.”

  “No, I neva said that, me. You mus’ dreamt that.”

  “Oh, I thought you did. You know I’m going down to the city.”

  “wean?”

  “To-night.”

  “Betta make has’e, then; it’s mos’ day.”

  “Well, to-morrow’ll do.”

  “W’at you goin’ do, yonda?”

  “I don’t know. Drown myself in the lake, maybe; unless you go down there to visit your uncle.”

  Calixta’s senses were reeling; and they well-nigh left her when she felt Alcée’s lips brush her ear like the touch of a rose.

  “Mista Alcée! Is dat Mista Alcée?” the thick voice of a negro was asking ; he stood on the ground, holding to the banister-rails near which the couple sat.

  “W’at do you want now?” cried Alcée impatiently. “Can’t I have a moment of peace?”

  “I ben huntin’ you high an’ low, suh,” answered the man. “Dey—dey some one in de road, onda de mulbare-tree, want see you a minute.”

  “I wouldn’t go out to the road to see the Angel Gabriel. And if you come back here with any more talk, I’ll have to break your neck.” The negro turned mumbling away.

  Alcée and Calixta laughed softly about it. Her boisterousness was all gone. They talked low, and laughed softly, as lovers do.

  “Alcée! Alcée Laballière!”

  It was not the negro’s voice this time; but one that went through Alcée’s body like an electric shock, bringing him to his feet.

  Clarisse was standing there in her riding-habit, where the negro had stood. For an instant confusion reigned in Alcée’s thoughts, as with one who awakes suddenly from a dream. But he felt that something of serious import had brought his cousin to the ball in the dead of night.

  “W’at does this mean, Clarisse?” he asked.

  “It means something has happen’ at home. You mus’ come.”

  “Happened to maman?” he questioned, in alarm.

  “No; nénaine is well, and asleep. It is something else. Not to frighten you. But you mus’ come. Come with me, Alcée.”

  There was no need for the imploring note. He would have followed the voice anywhere.

  She had now recognized the girl sitting back on the bench.

  “Ah, c’est vous, Calixta? Comment ça va, mon enfant?”141

  “Tcha va b‘en; et vous, mam’zélle?” 142

  Alcée swung himself over the low rail and started to follow Clarisse, without a word, without a glance back at the girl. He had forgotten he was leaving her there. But Clarisse whispered something to him, and he turned back to say “Good-night, Calixta,” and offer his hand to press through the railing. She pretended not to see it.

  “How come that? You settin’ yere by yo‘se’f, Calixta?” It was Bobinôt who had found her there alone. The dancers had not yet come out. She looked ghastly in the faint, gray light struggling out of the east.

  “Yes, that’s me. Go yonda in the parc aux petit an’ ask Aunt Olisse fu’ my hat. She knows w’ere ’t is. I want to go home, me.”

  “How you came?”

  “I come afoot, with the Cateaus. But I’m goin’ now. I ent goin’ wait fu’ ’em. I’m plumb wo’ out, me.”

  “Kin I go with you, Calixta?”

  “I don’ care.”

  They went together across the open prairie and along the edge of the fields, stumbling in the uncertain light. He told her to lift her dress that was getting wet and bedraggled; for she was pulling at the weeds and grasses with her hands.

  “I don’ care; it’s got to go in the tub, anyway. You been sayin’ all along you want to marry me, Bobinôt. Well, if you want, yet, I don’ care, me.”

  The glow of a sudden and overwhelming happiness shone out in the brown, rugged face of the young Acadian. He could not speak, for very joy. It choked him.

  “Oh well, if you don’ want,” snapped Calixta, flippantly, pretending to be piqued at his silence.

  “Bon Dieu!143 You know that makes me crazy, w‘at you sayin’. You mean that, Calixta? You ent goin’ turn roun’ agin?”

  “I neva tole you that much yet, Bobinôt. I mean that. Tiens,” and she held out her hand in the business-like manner of a man who clinches a bargain with a hand-clasp. Bobinôt grew bold with happiness and asked Calixta to kiss him. She turned her face, that was almost ugly after the night’s dissipation, and looked steadily into his.

  “I don’ want to kiss you, Bobinôt,” she said, turning away again, “not to-day. Some other time. Bonté divine!144 ent you satisfy, yet!”

  “Oh, I’m satisfy, Calixta,” he said.

  Riding through a patch of wood, Clarisse’s saddle became ungirted, and she and Alcée dismounted to readjust it.

  For the twentieth time he asked her what had happened at home.

  “But, Clarisse, w’at is it? Is it a misfortune?”

  “Ah Dieu sait!145 It’s only something that happen’ to me.”

  “To you!”

  “I saw you go away las’ night, Alcée, with those saddle-bags,” she said, haltingly, striving to arrange something about the saddle, “an’ I made Bruce tell me. He said you had gone to the ball, an’ wouldn’ be home for weeks an’ weeks. I thought, Alcée - maybe you were going to—to Assumption. I got wild. An’ then I knew if you didn’t come back, now, tonight, I couldn’t stan’ it—again.”

  She had her face hidden in her arm that she was resting against the saddle when she said that.

  He began to wonder if this meant love. But she had to tell him so, before he believed it. And when she told him, he thought the face of the Universe was changed—just like Bobinôt. Was it last week the cyclone had well-nigh ruined him? The cyclone seemed a huge joke, now. It was he, then, who, an hour ago was kissing little Calixta’s ear and whispering nonsense into it. Calixta was like a myth, now. The one, only, great reality in the world was Clarisse standing before him, telling him that she loved him.

  In the distance they heard the rapid discharge of pistol-shots; but it did not disturb them. They knew it was only the negro musicians who had gone into the yard to fire their pistols into the air, as the custom is, and to 146145 announce “le bal est fini.” 146

  Désirée’s Baby

  AS THE DAY WAS pleasant, Madame Valmondé drove over to L’Abri to see Désirée and the baby.

  It made her laugh to think of Désirée with a baby. Why, it seemed but yesterday that Désirée was little more than a baby herself; when Monsieur in riding through the gateway of Valmondé had found her lying asleep in the shadow of the big stone pillar.

  The little one awoke in his arms and began to cry for “Dada.” That was as much as she could do or say. Some people thought she might have strayed there of her own accord, for she was of the toddling age. The prevailing belief was that she had been purposely left by a party of Texans, whose canvas-covered wagon, late in the day, had crossed the ferry that Coton Maïs kept, just below the plantation. In time Madame Valmondé abandoned every speculation but the one that Désirée had been sent to her by a beneficent Providence to be the child of her affection, seeing that she was without child of the flesh. For the girl grew to be beautiful and gentle, affectionate and sincere—the idol of Valmondé.

  It was no wonder, when she stood one day against the stone pillar in whose shadow she had lain asleep, eighteen years before, that Armand Aubigny riding by and seeing her there, had fallen in love with her. That was the way all the Aubignys fell in love, as if struck by a pistol shot. The wonder was that he had not loved her before; for he had known her since his father brought him home from Paris, a boy of eight, after his mother died there. The passion that awok
e in him that day, when he saw her at the gate, swept along like an avalanche, or like a prairie fire, or like anything that drives headlong over all obstacles.

  Monsieur Valmondé grew practical and wanted things well considered : that is, the girl’s obscure origin. Armand looked into her eyes and did not care. He was reminded that she was nameless. What did it matter about a name when he could give her one of the oldest and proudest in Louisiana? He ordered the corbeille147 from Paris, and contained himself with what patience he could until it arrived; then they were married.

  Madame Valmondé had not seen Désirée and the baby for four weeks. When she reached L’Abri she shuddered at the first sight of it, as she always did. It was a sad-looking place, which for many years had not known the gentle presence of a mistress, old Monsieur Aubigny having married and buried his wife in France, and she having loved her own land too well ever to leave it. The roof came down steep and black like a cowl, reaching out beyond the wide galleries that encircled the yellow stuccoed house. Big, solemn oaks grew close to it, and their thick-leaved, far-reaching branches shadowed it like a pall. Young Aubigny’s rule was a strict one, too, and under it his negroes had forgotten how to be gay, as they had been during the old master’s easy-going and indulgent lifetime.

  The young mother was recovering slowly, and lay full length, in her soft white muslins and laces, upon a couch. The baby was beside her, upon her arm, where he had fallen asleep, at her breast. The yellow nurse woman sat beside a window fanning herself.

  Madame Valmondé bent her portly figure over Désirée and kissed her, holding her an instant tenderly in her arms. Then she turned to the child.

  “This is not the baby!” she exclaimed, in startled tones. French was the language spoken at Valmondé in those days.

  “I knew you would be astonished,” laughed Désirée, “at the way he has grown. The little cochon de lait!148 Look at his legs, mamma, and his hands and fingernails—real finger-nails. Zandrine had to cut them this morning. Isn’t it true, Zandrine?”

  The woman bowed her turbaned head majestically, “Mais si, 149 Madame.”

  “And the way he cries,” went on Désirée, “is deafening. Armand heard him the other day as far away as La Blanche’s cabin.”

  Madame Valmondé had never removed her eyes from the child. She lifted it and walked with it over to the window that was lightest. She scanned the baby narrowly, then looked as searchingly at Zandrine, whose face was turned to gaze across the fields.

  “Yes, the child has grown, has changed,” said Madame Valmonde, slowly, as she replaced it beside its mother. “What does Armand say?”

  Désirée’s face became suffused with a glow that was happiness itself. “Oh, Armand is the proudest father in the parish, I believe, chiefly because it is a boy, to bear his name; though he says not—that he would have loved a girl as well. But I know it isn’t true. I know he says that to please me. And mamma,” she added, drawing Madame Valmondé’s head down to her, and speaking in a whisper, “he hasn’t punished one of them—not one of them—since baby is born. Even Negrillon, who pretended to have burnt his leg that he might rest from work—he only laughed, and said Négrillon was a great scamp. Oh, mamma, I’m so happy; it frightens me.”

  What Désirée said was true. Marriage, and later the birth of his son had softened Armand Aubigny’s imperious and exacting nature greatly. This was what made the gentle Désirée so happy, for she loved him desperately. When he frowned she trembled, but loved him. When he smiled, she asked no greater blessing of God. But Armand’s dark, handsome face had not often been disfigured by frowns since the day he fell in love with her.

  When the baby was about three months old, Désirée awoke one day to the conviction that there was something in the air menacing her peace. It was at first too subtle to grasp. It had only been a disquieting suggestion; an air of mystery among the blacks; unexpected visits from far-off neighbors who could hardly account for their coming. Then a strange, an awful change in her husband’s manner, which she dared not ask him to explain. When he spoke to her, it was with averted eyes, from which the old love-light seemed to have gone out. He absented himself from home; and when there, avoided her presence and that of her child, without excuse. And the very spirit of Satan seemed suddenly to take hold of him in his dealings with the slaves. Désirée was miserable enough to die.

  She sat in her room, one hot afternoon, in her peignoir; listlessly drawing through her fingers the strands of her long, silky brown hair that hung about her shoulders. The baby, half naked, lay asleep upon her own great mahogany bed, that was like a sumptuous throne, with its satin-lined half-canopy. One of La Blanche’s little quadroon boys—half naked too—stood fanning the child slowly with a fan of peacock feathers. Désirée’s eyes had been fixed absently and sadly upon the baby, while she was striving to penetrate the threatening mist that she felt closing about her. She looked from her child to the boy who stood beside him, and back again; over and over. “Ah!” It was a cry that she could not help; which she was not conscious of having uttered. The blood turned like ice in her veins, and a clammy moisture gathered upon her face.

  She tried to speak to the little quadroon boy; but no sound would come, at first. When he heard his name uttered, he looked up, and his mistress was pointing to the door. He laid aside the great, soft fan, and obediently stole away, over the polished floor, on his bare tiptoes.

  She stayed motionless, with gaze riveted upon her child, and her face the picture of fright.

  Presently her husband entered the room, and without noticing her, went to a table and began to search among some papers which covered it.

  “Armand,” she called to him, in a voice which must have stabbed him, if he was human. But he did not notice. “Armand,” she said again. Then she rose and tottered toward him. “Armand,” she panted once more, clutching his arm, “look at our child. What does it mean? tell me.”

  He coldly but gently loosened her fingers from about his arm and thrust the hand away from him. “Tell me what it means!” she cried despairingly.

  “It means,” he answered lightly, “that the child is not white; it means that you are not white.”

  A quick conception of all that this accusation meant for her nerved her with unwonted courage to deny it. “It is a lie; it is not true, I am white! Look at my hair, it is brown; and my eyes are gray, Armand, you know they are gray. And my skin is fair,” seizing his wrist. “Look at my hand; whiter than yours, Armand,” she laughed hysterically.

  “As white as La Blanche’s,” he returned cruelly; and went away leaving her alone with their child.

  When she could hold a pen in her hand, she sent a despairing letter to Madame Valmondé.

  “My mother, they tell me I am not white. Armand has told me I am not white. For God’s sake tell them it is not true. You must know it is not true. I shall die. I must die. I cannot be so unhappy, and live.”

  The answer that came was as brief:

  “My own Désirée: Come home to Valmondé; back to your mother who loves you. Come with your child.”

  When the letter reached Désirée she went with it to her husband’s study, and laid it open upon the desk before which he sat. She was like a stone image: silent, white, motionless after she placed it there.

  In silence he ran his cold eyes over the written words. He said nothing. “Shall I go, Armand?” she asked in tones sharp with agonized suspense.

  “Yes, go.”

  “Do you want me to go?”

  “Yes, I want you to go.”

  He thought Almighty God had dealt cruelly and unjustly with him; and felt, somehow, that he was paying Him back in kind when he stabbed thus into his wife’s soul. Moreover he no longer loved her, because of the unconscious injury she had brought upon his home and his name.

  She turned away like one stunned by a blow, and walked slowly toward the door, hoping he would call her back.

  “Good-by, Armand,” she moaned.

  He did not answer h
er. That was his last blow at fate.

  Désirée went in search of her child. Zandrine was pacing the sombre gallery with it. She took the little one from the nurse’s arms with no word of explanation, and descending the steps, walked away, under the live-oak branches.

  It was an October afternoon; the sun was just sinking. Out in the still fields the negroes were picking cotton.

  Désirée had not changed the thin white garment nor the slippers which she wore. Her hair was uncovered and the sun’s rays brought a golden gleam from its brown meshes. She did not take the broad, beaten road which led to the far-off plantation of Valmondé. She walked across a deserted field, where the stubble bruised her tender feet, so delicately shod, and tore her thin gown to shreds.

  She disappeared among the reeds and willows that grew thick along the banks of the deep, sluggish bayou;150 and she did not come back again.

  Some weeks later there was a curious scene enacted at L’Abri. In the centre of the smoothly swept back yard was a great bonfire. Armand Aubigny sat in the wide hallway that commanded a view of the spectacle ; and it was he who dealt out to a half dozen negroes the material which kept this fire ablaze.

  A graceful cradle of willow, with all its dainty furbishings, was laid upon the pyre, which had already been fed with the richness of a priceless layette.151 Then there were silk gowns, and velvet and satin ones added to these; laces, too, and embroideries; bonnets and gloves; for the corbeille had been of rare quality.

  The last thing to go was a tiny bundle of letters; innocent little scribblings that Désirée had sent to him during the days of their espousal. There was the remnant of one back in the drawer from which he took them. But it was not Désirée’s; it was part of an old letter from his mother to his father. He read it. She was thanking God for the blessing of her husband’s love—“But, above all,” she wrote, “night and day, I thank the good God for having so arranged our lives that our dear Armand will never know that his mother, who adores him, belongs to the race that is cursed with the brand of slavery.”