Chapter Forty-Five
I rounded the corner of the locker room, trying to get my head around the new Year Twelve layout and fall back into the routine of school.
On the first day back, I knew I was out of sorts because, of all things, I was happy to be back at school. So wrong, I know.
With a sigh, I opened my new locker and gathered my bag. Irritating laughter bounced off the metal lockers and echoed around the room. A few lockers up from me, Carla unlocked her locker and cast me a smug smile.
"How was your summer, Tess?"
I narrowed my eyes. Before I could reply, another voice interrupted me.
"Shut up, Carla!" Scott opened his locker on the other side of her.
Carla's gaze flew to him in utter surprise.
He stared her down. "Leave Tess alone."
At a loss for anything intelligent to say or do, Carla just scoffed. "Whatever." She slammed her door with a bang and made sure she cast me a murderous look on the way out.
Scott gave me an awkward smile as he gathered his books and walked away.
Had he actually called me Tess?
Adam and Ellie walked around the corner and spotted me.
"There you are? You ready?" Ellie smiled.
We made our way out through the gates and under the 'Onslow High' arch. The grounds were swarming with everyone's excitement of surviving their first day back.
"Chris is picking me up, you ladies need a lift?" asked Adam.
"No, I'm right," Ellie said. "Stan should be here somewhere." She eagerly looked out over the road at the long line of parked cars, biting her lip in anticipation. Her eyes searched down the road when she suddenly froze.
"Tess."
Adam and I were equally confused until we followed her gaze, and that's when I saw him.
Toby leaned against the driver's door of his ute, arms crossed, his gaze unreadable, and fixed on me.
"Tess, are you okay? Do want us to wait?"
Ellie and Adam were just as rigid with shock as I was. It took me a moment to offer any kind of acknowledgment.
"It's okay." I took a deep breath. "I'm sure this won't take long."
Adam grabbed my bag. "We'll wait."
"Okay," I said, but I doubt it was even audible. I willed my legs to move, and after a moment, they carried me across the road, my hands fisted at my sides to disguise the tremor.
Just breathe, Tess. Just. Breathe.
As I stopped in front of him, he straightened, pushing his hands deep into his jean pockets.
What was I supposed to say? Hey? How's it going? Instead, we just stood there. God, this was horrible. What did he want me to say? Oh God, what if he wasn't here for me? What if -
"You didn't come to my farewell party at Stan's?"
Was he for real? I had said my goodbyes.
Toby shifted, but his seriousness remained. "Shame. It was a good party."
He was bummed I'd missed a good party a couple of weeks ago? I didn't understand. Everything about our exchange was so wooden, so unnatural. It hurt.
I hadn't seen him in weeks, and yet as I spotted him across the school, my heart spiked its betrayal like it always did. I would never get over this boy; saying goodbye was the hardest thing I had done. I'd known he was still in town until today and, for some reason, knowing he was still in Onslow had appeased me, because he was still near. But now with his departure looming over me, over us, of him really leaving, of him standing in front of me, he was killing me all over again.
His head tilted slightly, his lips twitched. "Don't make me say it."
I paused. "Say what?"
"Penny for your thoughts."
"Oh." I smiled weakly.
Awkward silence wedged its ugly way between us.
"So, you're leaving?"
His fleeting moment of humour sobered as he nodded.
I was drowning inside. I dug my nails into my palms. I had faked being okay for so long, that now I needed to be stronger than ever, and I could feel my fa?ade crumbling.
I was about to say, "Good luck" and scurry away when he stepped forward. "I head off in about twelve months' time."
"What?"
What did he just say?
A smile broke out on his lips.
"I am going, Tess, just not today."
Was he taunting me? Was he trying to punish me by giving me false hope, only to rip it from underneath me? He could have been, but I didn't believe it, because I did know him, and he wouldn't do that.
"I don't care about what happened with Sean ?" He took in a deep breath. "Okay, I do care. But not enough. Not enough to walk away."
"But your job ?"
"It can wait."
I could feel myself falling, the walls were crumbling with a fear to hope, to believe.
"So you're not leaving?" I whispered.
Toby reached for me, took my hands, squeezing them. "How can I? Ya see, there's this girl, and I'm kind of crazy about her."
My heart pounded against my chest.
"I've done a lot of thinking; all I know is I should have told you that ages ago." He pushed a wayward strand of hair from my brow.
I glanced around. "Did you want to talk about this somewhere else?" I asked.
"Oh, I think right here is perfect for what I need to do."
Toby smiled his perfect, wicked smile, the very one that melted me. I thought my heart might stop as he edged closer, tilting my chin up with his hand.
"What do you need to do?" I whispered.
"This." He captured my lips in a long, lingering kiss. My walls came crumbling down as I melted against him, his arms encircled me, and I was lost to the feel, the memory, of all that was Toby.
Lost in the happiness as I folded my arms around Toby's neck, we both flinched at the blast of a horn as a car pulled up beside us. Chris, Sean and Adam looked on from their seats with big, goofy grins.
Chris shook his head. "Settle down you two, there are children present."
Adam held up his hands. "Seriously, why look at me when you say that?"
Sean ignored the brotherly sparring as he grinned at us, bobbing his head in approval. "'Bout bloody time."
A second horn sounded from behind; Stan waved his arm out the window. "Come on, people, move along, nothing to see here."
Ellie sucker punched him from her passenger seat.
"Where we headed?" asked Toby, taking my hand in his.
"Well, nowhere too extravagant, it is a school night," Sean teased.
Toby flipped him the finger and everyone laughed.
"Follow us," Chris said.
Toby and I slipped into the ute, and he started the engine.
I slid over to the middle to belt in and lean against his side.
"We're going to do this? For real?"
Toby frowned. "What, follow Chris? Well ?"
"No, I mean us, you and me?"
A smile lit up his face. "Yes, ma'am!"
My heart swelled at the way his warm eyes rested on me for the longest moment before he turned the wheel to fall in line behind Stan.
"Then there's one thing I need to know," I said, in all seriousness. And there was. One thing I had wondered about above all others.
Toby frowned with uncertainty, his eyes flicking to me and back to the road.
"What's that?"
I leaned into him, smiling through my words as I whispered, "What does the 'E' stand for?"
Toby broke out in a fit of deep, rich laughter. Shaking his head, he said, "Ernest ? My middle name is Ernest."
Ernest. It made me love him all the more.
Epilogue
6 months later
The place was deserted.
And why wouldn't it be? Toby and I sat in the main bar of the Onslow Hotel on a Tuesday night.
Toby grimaced. "I'm sorry this isn't much of a way to spend your birthday."
I clasped my necklace for probably the hundredth time, admiring the beautiful chain and gold disc pendant that had
an italic 'T' engraved on it.
A 'T' for Tess, a 'T' for Toby.
"It's perfect!" I leaned over to show him how perfect.
"Keep it PG guys, I'm still here." Chris looked on in distaste, as he had a tendency to do whenever we were around.
"What are you doing hanging in a bar midweek, anyway?" Chris posed.
I straightened on my stool. "Hey, I'm eighteen now! I'm completely legal, so rack 'em up, bar-keep." I slammed my hand on the bar way too hard.
Chris looked on with a 'kill me now' expression; he poured a glass of the house white and placed it in front of me.
"On the house, Birthday Girl."
"Thanks." I smiled.
Even though I was secretly miffed that I had to remind Chris that it was my birthday (I mean, I had reminded everyone I had ever met for the past month that I was turning eighteen), it wasn't just Chris that disappointed me. My own parents, my flesh and blood, had sung me a rather quick, halfhearted version of 'Happy Birthday' before they ducked to work, with promises that come the weekend they would make it up to me. I had received a rather animated text from Ellie saying 'Happy Birthday' and 'call you later'. At least Adam had come over, even if he hadn't stayed long.
I had been on the verge of cracking open a tub of ice cream out of depression until Toby picked me up. I had been spilling out all my troubles when he asked me to pass him something from his glove box. I was so engulfed in self-pity I passed the white box with the pretty red bow to him without even taking a breath. I only paused when he pulled over and looked at me with an incredulous smile.
I touched my necklace again at the memory. Every time I did, Toby broke into a smile, pleased.
He picked up his beer, and held it up towards me.
"A toast to the Birthday Girl."
I grabbed my ever so grown-up house white and clinked our glasses together.
I was finally an adult!
I took a deep, confident gulp, only to gag when it went down the wrong way. My eyes watered as I tried to draw breath. Toby thumped me on my back as I coughed and spluttered all over the bar.
Yep! I may be eighteen, but the stuff was still vile.
Toby tried to salvage my dignity. "Chris, can you grab us a glass of water and some menus, mate?"
Chris managed the water. "Sorry to be a killjoy guys, but I'll have to call last drinks. I'm shutting up soon."
Toby did a double take. "What, no dinner?"
Chris shrugged. "Sorry mate, it's what happens mid-week."
I looked at the wall clock, it was only 8.30pm, and I was starving. I saw the disappointment in Toby's face so I didn't press the issue. Yeah, this was turning into some birthday.
I didn't even manage to finish my glass of water as Chris stalked up and down the bar, collecting beer mats, and wiping down.
Okay, okay, we're going, geez ?
I grabbed my bag and went to walk out the front when Toby grabbed my hand.
"This way." He pulled me in the opposite direction with a devilish smile.
"But the car's out front."
He dragged me along until we were engulfed by the darkness of the restaurant, where he paused and kissed me into silence.
"I thought you might want to do some reminiscing in the beer garden." He nuzzled into my neck. I giggled as his breath tickled me.
My eyes darted. "What about Chris?"
Toby kissed me again, and all of a sudden I didn't care anymore. This was the best birthday ever.
Just as I was relaxing, getting lost in his kisses, he broke away.
"Come on." He tugged me into action; my mind was still drunk from his kisses.
I followed his long, confident stride through the dark restaurant, and he guided me to the sliding door that led out to the beer garden.
Now was as good a time as any, I thought.
I stopped him, just as he was about to open the door.
"Toby, there's something. Well, there's something I've been wanting to say."
And just as I was about to form my next sentence, the sliding door flew open and lights flooded the garden.
"SURPRISE!!" roared the crowd, followed by a rather hideous and ill-matched version of 'Happy Birthday'.
I shielded my eyes as they adjusted to the brightness, my other hand clutching at my racing heart.
They were all here. Mum, Dad, Adam, Ellie. To my right, Uncle Eric, Claire, Amy. Melba and Rosanna clapping in front. And a line of beaming Onslow Boys.
My eyes welled.
They hadn't forgotten.
After the initial shock I turned to Toby. "You!" I went to whack his arm but he caught my wrist and pulled me into a hug. "Happy Birthday, Tess," he whispered into my temple.
"Alright, alright, that's enough of that, you two." My dad broke in and took my hand. He flicked Toby his regular 'the jury is still out on you' glance. It always mortified me. It had been six months, and Dad still hadn't fully accepted Toby. Toby still suffered through uncomfortable family dinners/interrogations. Mum, on the other hand, loved Toby and came over to link her arm through his with an apologetic smile.
Dad walked me over to a huge table fully set with gold embossed china and sparkling crystal wine glasses, and draped in crisp white linen. Tea candles and vases of white Iceberg flowers ran down the centre. My chin trembled; it was so beautiful, and it was all for me.
"Melba and I set it out this afternoon," Amy blurted out.
"It's beautiful." I touched one of the intricately folded napkins.
I sat at the head of the table, Toby to my left and Mum and Dad to my right. My eyes trailed down to the long line of friends before me.
Ellie was explaining to Adam the order of cutlery to eat with, Sean debating Aussie rules with Stan, Claire Henderson fussing over Uncle Eric's tie.
Whoa. Uncle Eric was wearing a tie?
My heart swelled with a deep, immense love for them all. Even for Melba and Rosanna who ushered behind Amy with platters of food. Food that Rosanna constantly reminded me that she had spent all day in the kitchen cooking.
Toby leaned into me. "What was it you had to tell me?"
I blushed at the memory. "Oh, I'll tell you later."
Toby's frown was broken by the clinking of a fork on a wine glass.
Ellie stood up, her eyes already shiny with emotion.
"Adam and I flipped a coin over who would do the best friend speech. Even though Adam lost, he said he would be pacified with the knowledge that Tess secretly held a flame for him."
Laughter was amplified by Chris punching Adam in the arm.
"What? It's true; sorry, Toby."
"Anyway, I'll make this quick. To Tess ?" She held up her glass. "? the most amazing person I know. My life will always be brighter because you're the one that shines next to me."
"To Tess!" Glasses clinked all down the table, and Ellie wiped her eyes.
I fanned my face to stop the tears from overflowing. Toby winked at me and squeezed my knee.
A long line of embarrassing speeches followed. About my hopeless bar skills from Chris, my cappuccino fear from Melba, the girl in the white bikini from Sean that made me blush crimson.
"What bikini?" my dad asked, before the subject was swiftly changed. The only person that didn't speak was Toby, who sat silently by my side.
After the cake and embarrassing childhood stories and what seemed like hours and hours of laughter, the party wound down and guests left. It was time to clear the table and blow out the tea lights. I instinctively went to grab the empty glasses.
"Leave it, honey, it will all be there tomorrow." Claire Henderson smiled as she and Uncle Eric retired for the night.
They were the last to leave; now only Toby and I remained.
"They better hope it's all there in the morning. What's the going rate for fine china on the black market these days?" Toby said, as he looked over the messy table.
I sidled up to him, wrapping my arms around his neck. His attention quickly snapped from the table to me.
/>
"I have a bone to pick with you, Toby Morrison."
"I have been keeping this party a secret for three weeks! My life would not have been worth living if I slipped up."
I laughed. "Not that! I do believe you promised me some beer garden reminiscing?"
A wicked smile broke out on his lips. "That's right, before we were so rudely interrupted."
A stillness swept over Toby. His smile changed into a serious intensity as he swallowed hard. "I love you, Tess McGee. I don't do big funny or heartfelt speeches in front of people at birthday parties, but I'm excellent in private alcoves in beer gardens." He paused. "Okay, that sounded really bad, what I mean is ?"
I kissed him into silence. I pressed my forehead against his with a sigh. "I love you, too, Toby. In fact, that's what I was going to tell you before we walked into the beer garden. Right before the really bad singing started."
Toby chuckled. He let out a sigh of relief. "Ready to reminisce?"
I whispered my final word before he closed the distance.
"Always."
##
Can't wait to read more about the Onslow Boys?
Be sure to catch the next book in
C.J Duggan's Summer Series?
An Endless Summer
By C.J Duggan.
2013
It's Summer time 4 years on.
And EVERYONE'S coming home.
Acknowledgements
This is a twofold acknowledgment, first is to my husband and the second for everyone else.
To Mick, for bringing me drinks and food on the days I am locked away in my office with my head stuck in imaginary worlds. For supporting and believing in everything I do with your unwavering love and understanding. We have had 10 wonderful years together; I can't wait for the rest of our lives. No matter what happens, "It's you and me."
To my amazing team: it truly takes a village to raise a novel. A deep heartfelt thanks to the following villagers.
Ednah Walters, you introduced me to this inspiring world and told me "To own what I do." My life from that moment on was never the same. I'm afraid there are no words big enough.
Sascha Craig, you were the driving force behind me. You pushed me on the days I wanted to kill off all my characters in a freak mudslide accident. I will never forget our endless hours of late night phone edits, but most of all for believing in me when I didn't believe in myself.
To my fabulous editor, Sarah Billington: you have a true talent for making words shine. Your guidance and attention to detail lit a fire within me. You pushed me to think outside the box, and I adore your for that.
To my dear friend and incredibly talented Cover Designer, Keary Taylor: my world is so much more beautiful because you are in it. I cherish our friendship and look forward to many more future projects with you.
To my delightful Copy Editor, Anita Saunders: you are the icing on this cake. Your support and enthusiasm through your emails always make me smile.
To the brilliant Heather Adkins, my proofreading and formatting wing woman. You have such an incredible eye for detail; you are the glue that holds everything together. I would be lost without you.
To my beautiful mum for sharing her love of books with me, and the hours and hours of re-reading the same story and unwaveringly encouraging me to believe in myself.
To my crazy dad for taking me on a holiday of a lifetime and never forgetting to ring me up everyday and asking me, "How's that book going?"
To my family and friends for their love and enthusiasm in respecting and supporting my dream (especially in my moody, reclusive moments.) I am so blessed to have you all by my side.
And to all the passionate book lovers out there, you make what I do an absolute joy, never stop day dreaming about the make believe.
About the Author
C.J Duggan is an Australian author who lives with her husband in a rural border town of New South Wales, Australia.
The Boys of Summer is Book One in her Mature Young Adult Romance Series.
For more on C.J and 'The Summer Series', visit www.cjdugganbooks.com
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