* * *
I lay on my bed crying, not even knowing what the tears were really about: Adriana's death, my kissing cousin, or Jordan? Maybe it was a combination of everything. Feelings that I had locked away for so long had finally come bubbling to the surface.
"Aunt Laura," Cassandra called through the closed door. "Are you alright?"
My weeping must have been loud enough to draw my niece down from her room.
"I'm okay, sweetie." I sniffed. "Just need to rest for a moment."
"Are you sure?" I could detect doubt in her voice.
"I'm fine really, just exhausted."
Her soft footsteps retreated down the corridor. I hoped Nathaniel would not return with more apologies. Our relationship was broken now and there were no words that could mend it. I could never look at him the same way again. I would always remember that horrible moment by the lighthouse, our lighthouse where we played together as children. Now it would stand forever as a monument and reminder of his indiscretion, his folly, his slip of the tongue.
Getting up, I peered at my reflection in the mirror. It betrayed a woman with red swollen eyes. Opening the desk, I looked about for a box of tissues. As my hand groped around, I spotted a green leather-bound journal inside the drawer. Taking it out, I ran my hand whimsically across the smooth cover. It was a diary. Maybe Adriana had kept an account of her thought-life. If her death was not an accident, there might be a clue inside these pages. Placing it under my arm, I carried it with me to the Reading Room and sat down. Left alone with only my thoughts, I opened the journal and began to read.
June 4th
Because of yet another drinking spree, Sebastian had passed out on the deck. Since I had no idea how to navigate this boat, I was forced to wait until he regained consciousness before we could return to shore again. How many times have I watched him drown into an alcohol-induced oblivion? However, sleep was always better than his blind rages. They often led to violent rampages which I had been the victim of on a number of occasions, more than I care to remember.
I flinched at the thought of my sister being abused by my cousin. How long had this been going on for?
Finally Sebastian awakened and piloted us home again. But it did not feel like home anymore, at least not the home I once knew with my first love.
Her first love -- The only man I remember Adriana falling in love with was Sebastian. Who could this other man be?
I read a little further until I came to a more recent entry:
December, 23rd
My first love returned to me again. After I had rejected him for Sebastian, he still cared for me, providing sanctuary from the evil tyrant who was now my husband. Even with all the wounds and bruises that marred and scarred by body, he loved me yet. Like so many woman before me, I had made the wrong choice to marry for wealth. If I could only go back in time and do it all over again. But I had reaped what I had sown, and who could predict how this all would end?
My heart raced within me at my sister's words. I had no clue any of this was going on. But in hindsight, off-hand comments she made began to make sense. Adrianna had been encouraging me to appreciate my days as a single woman. And here I was twenty-seven years old and still not betrothed to anyone. Nathaniel's face appeared in my mind and I inwardly cringed. I would not make the same mistake my sister had by marrying my cousin. I cared for Nathaniel as family, but there were no romantic aspirations. In fact, I wasn't sure if I had ever been in love.
I looked at the journal and decided to wait until tomorrow to continue reading it. So much had transpired today, and I longed for a solitary place to collect my thoughts. I had completely forgotten about my novel from the library. Placing the journal back in the desk, I took out The Lost Nightingale by Jessica Collins. After sitting back down in the Reading Room, I stared blankly at the fireplace. My mind was exhausted and I realized now that I was too tired to read, so I closed my eyes and fell into a dreamless sleep.
It was after five when I was roused by the sound of voices. They were emanating from the hallway. I peeked around the corner and listened quietly. The ghostly whispers descended the stairs and into the corridor. They belonged to Nathaniel and Cassandra.
Quickly I retreated down the hall and glanced out the window. The sun would be setting very soon and Jordan would be waiting for me on the beach. I took a sweater from the front hall closet and stole outside into the twilight.
I made my way down the stairs to the beach below. The western sun had dipped into the sea with a final burst of amber to saturate the clouds. It was a spectacle to behold. The elegance of the sunset was only duplicated by its rippled reflection upon the waves. A cool wind tugged at the hem of my dress. I drew my sweater snugly around me, as my eyes darted about for Jordan. But he was nowhere to be found. Minutes dragged by slowly while my legs grew weary. I reclined myself on the dunes and waited in the evening hush. The dark shadow of the lighthouse loomed in the sky, silhouetted against the stars. There was no moon out tonight, though some fog managed to sail in with the tide. Still there was no sign of Jordan. Had he forgotten or had the spell been broken? I stood up and walked back towards the steps leading to the house.
"Laura wait!" a voice called out.
And all at once, he was there beside me with his hand outstretched.
"Here, I have something for you." he held out a seashell in his hand. "I know you like to collect these."
Surprise was written across my face, since I had never mentioned that to him.
"Thank you," I said taking it from his hand. "I was beginning to think you weren't coming."
His smile lit the darkness. "I always keep my promises."
I began to feel unsteady and reached out for him.
Jordan caught my hand and gathered me into the cradle of his embrace.
I held onto him, still feeling a bit weak and dizzy.
"Tell me, what’s wrong?" he implored.
I lowered my gaze into his haunting eyes.
Not being able to resist the pull of his gravity, I began to recount the events of the day; from my cousin's kiss to my sister's revelation in her journal.
Jordan wrapped his arms tightly around me. Then without a word he kissed me sweetly upon the cheek.
His blue eyes were filled with compassion.
"I want to be there for you Laura." he said earnestly. "Tell me how I can do that."
I regarded the depths of his sincerity, but wasn't sure how to respond.
"You just being here is enough." I answered.
Though I had this moment in time, which seemed forever, I knew with the dawn he would be gone again.
Leaning his head forward, he gently placed his lips against my neck. Something awakened in me that I had never experienced before; a yearning that only he was able to quench.
"Laura," he breathed softly, “I want to take you somewhere.”
"Do you mean tonight?” I asked
"Yes,” he replied. “It’s not far from here.”
Taking my hand in his, he led me along the shoreline. A canopy of stars graced our way to the other side of the bay. Our path ended at the foot of the lighthouse. I gazed up intently at the impenetrable beacon bathed in darkness.
"But it's locked." I said.
Jordan reached out his hand, and touched the door. It responded by creaking open.
"How did you do that?"
Smiling, he ushered me inside, and we ascended the long procession of stairs that travelled into the sky. Glancing down I experienced a sensation of vertigo. Sensing this, Jordan pulled me closer until we finally arrived at the apex of the lighthouse. It was constructed of glass with a short walkway that circled the rim. He held me protectively against him on the balcony, weaving his fingers through mine.
The ocean current moved restlessly below, while a sea of stars danced in the vaults of heaven. So surreal like a dream, this moment could go on forever. Who was he and where did he
come from?
"Tell me, Jordan. Where do you live?"
His eyes met mine. "I have nowhere left to go, except you. You are my home."
And with that he sealed my mouth affectionately with his lips. Somewhere inside me a tidal wave of emotions were released. The flood gates had been lifted, and these extraordinary emotions swam through my body. I was in heaven, both metaphorically and literally. The thrill of love spilled over into my mind, and my body cascaded into his arms as they swept me off my feet. And then suddenly everything faded to black.
The next moment, I was lying in my bed all alone. The sound of crickets came through my open window filling the empty room. Was my incredible evening just a dream?
As I turned on my side, I felt something sharp. I reached into my pocket and there it was again. Not a dream, but real. I held the truth of the night in my hand -- the seashell Jordan had given to me. Or was this the one I had placed in my pocket earlier in the day? I couldn't remember now. I began to cry and felt my world spinning out of control. Was he only a creature of my invention? What proof did I have that he really existed?
Instead of going back to sleep, I spent the remainder of the morning reading my library book. It made me think about Jordan and why I was so fascinated with him.
In the novel, the main protagonist Emily, like me, had come to a lonely house to be a governess of a young ward, in this case a boy. Emily had been thwarted by relatives with unsavory motives. This reminded me of the fallout with my cousin. Then there was her savior, a mysterious man named Garret who rescued her from various predicaments.
I wondered why I was so attracted to Jordan. At first, I was mesmerized by his beauty and eyes that spoke of eternity. Then there was his miraculous ability to be available whenever I was lonely. There were intimate moments and even more intimate visions, with that undeniable connection I had with him. Finally there was last night, where I had experienced romantic love for the first time, in all its brilliant glory and exhilaration. But were Jordan and my feelings for him genuine? Or were they just as imaginary as this work of fiction that lay beside me?
I checked the clock on the desk and saw it was already 7:30 a.m. Ironically, I wasn't even sleepy. I wouldn't borrow Nathaniel's car, so this meant a long walk down the hill into town.
I first showered and changed my clothes before commencing on my journey. After ten minutes or so, a car stopped and someone gestured at me through the window. I couldn't make out who it was, so I approached the vehicle and they rolled their window down.
"Adriana, how the hell are you?" A man poked his head out.
I shouldn't have been surprised that anyone who thought they recognized me would actually be looking for my sister. She was the one that spent her last ten years here, not me. What surprised me though, was how uninformed this elderly gentleman was to not have known about my sister's passing.
"Are you going into town?" he asked.
I nodded my head and decided to keep quiet about my sister. He opened the door for me and accelerated the vehicle down the road. "So which way are you headed today?" He turned to look at me.
"I wanted to stop by the Maryvale Congregational Church."
His face looked surprised at this and then he laughed. "I think you already missed the service. It began thirty minutes ago."
"No problem, I wanted to look up an old friend in the churchyard."
I regretted saying this after I witnessed the effect it had on him. I could not have piqued his curiosity more.
"Well, I know most of the relics buried there. Who is it you're looking for?"
I wondered if I should mention his name. There might be a chance he would recognize it, as long as it wasn't too current like my sister.
"His name is Jordan. Jordan Harmon."
The old man stroked the stubble on his chin thoughtfully.
"No, I don't recollect of anyone by the name of Harmon buried there. I did know a Charles Harmon; he was a good customer that frequented my store. He’s about my age, though I’m fairly certain he’s not dead."
I contemplated this new information and wondered if Charles Harmon could be Jordan's father or grandfather.
"Do you still keep in contact with him?" I queried.
He shook his head dolefully.
"No, we lost touch after my business folded. That was nearly two decades ago. I try to keep up with the obituaries to see whose still among us. And I’ve never came across his name yet."
I didn't want to give up on this possible lead so I continued to question him.
"Did Charles have any children that you know of?"
He stopped for a red light and was gazed out the window in recollection. "Let me see. I do remember one son coming into my store but I don't remember his name."
I pondered this a moment and made a decision to press on.
"Could you describe what he looked like?"
"That was so long ago, Adriana. The boy was about ten years old, I believe. And if memory serves me correct, he had the same unruly black hair and striking blue eyes of his father.
Bingo and bull’s-eye, I thought. Of course wavy black hair and striking blue eyes were not uncommon, but Jordan was about my age. Two decades ago, I would have been seven. When I was on the shore building sandcastles with my cousin, Jordan could have been living somewhere close by in the same town.
I tried to think of any outstanding traits that would identify him further, but I realized it was a long time ago, and was satisfied to have this piece of the puzzle.
The old man pulled the car up beside the church on Ellstrom Lane and got out to open the door for me.
"I appreciate the lift" I thanked him.
"Anything for you, Adriana." he winked.
The Congregational Church was a historic landmark. An ancient stone building with a churchyard that tourist often photographed. The tombstones and crypt were surrounded by a low cobblestone fence.
I opened the small gate and surveyed the grounds. Most of the graves were old, there weren't many recent markers. I wended my way up and down the different rows of the dead, reading the names on the headstones. Some of the last names were the same, so apparently they were descendants of the next generation.
As I grew nearer to the church itself, I could hear the service in progress. I stepped quietly around the graves without finding success. There was no one named Harmon that I could find. As I neared the far side of the churchyard, I noticed a caretaker's cottage. Perhaps there might be someone there who had an inventory of all the names that were put to rest. The door to the cottage was partly open, so I stuck my head in and looked around.
"Can I help you?" A voice behind me inquired.
A stout middle-aged man with glasses, stood behind me outside the cottage.
"Hi there, I was trying to locate a particular grave. Could you help me?"
The man cleared his throat and motioned for me to follow him inside.
"Have a seat, and I'll be right with you."
He disappeared behind a partition and then appeared again with a large book. I figured that would be the roster with all the names.
"Who were you trying to locate, my dear?"
"I was looking for Jordan Harmon."
The man became flustered and nearly dropped his book. Instead, he set the book on a table and came over and sat beside me.
"I'm afraid he's not buried just yet."
I didn't understand what he meant.
"Not buried yet?" I echoed.
The man shook his head.
"No, not yet -- You see, his funeral is tomorrow." Then looking over the top of his spectacles he said, "Are you alright, Miss?"
The blood had completely drained from my face, and I must have appeared as one of the dead myself.
"I'm sorry, what did you say again?"
"The funeral is being held on Monday morning. There’s a small service for his family and friends. Did you know Mr. Harmon?"
I vacantly inclined my head.
"Could you tell me when he died?" I inquired.
"It was just last week. Didn't you read the newspaper?"
"No, I don't read the obituaries." I mumbled.
He shook his head.
"No, it wasn't in the obituary column; it was on the front page."
"Oh... Could you tell me what time the service is tomorrow?"
He thought for a moment.
"There's a viewing tomorrow morning at 11:30, followed by the burial."
My mind had gone completely blank.
"Thank you," I said getting up, and with a small wave of my hand, I left the cottage.
The man said that Jordan had died a week ago. Was it possible that someone was masquerading as him on the beach? Well, there was one way to find out. The local library would have a copy of last week’s newspaper. There should be a photo with the story there.
I crossed the avenue and made my way towards Main Street. When I got to the library I saw that it was closed. Of course, it was Sunday; I would need to come back tomorrow. I walked in a daze down the street to hail a cab. I needed to get home and crawl into bed. My lack of sleep had finally caught up with me, and I could barely keep my eyes open.
By the time I reached Hathaway Hall, it was already early afternoon. I fell asleep the moment I made contact with my pillow. I began to dream about a garden for the dead. There was an open meadow where the long lost departed came back to remember. I needed to find Adriana and protect her from Sebastian. When I arrived at the garden, I saw the dead moving about like sleepwalkers among the flowers. I kept searching their faces for my sister, and then I saw Jordan. His sapphire eyes met mine and they seemed aware that I knew he was dead. His hand reached out for me.
"Come with me, Laura" he beckoned. Despite some trepidation, I clasped his hand and followed him. We moved past the garden into a realm surrounded by mist and fog. There was what appeared to be a light in the distance. Maybe it was the lighthouse, I wasn't sure.
"We're almost there." he assured me.
We ventured further into the mist, swallowed by a cloud until he was obscured from sight.
"Jordan, where are you?" He was no longer holding my hand.
I cried out, but there was no answer. Was this death or oblivion? Just when I was about to turn around and go back, I heard his voice.
"We're here now." he said softly.
As I turned in the direction of his voice, the vapor began to evaporate. We stood in a clearing on the beach with the familiar sight of Hathaway Hall perched on the cliff above. It was daylight now and Jordan beamed at me with an intensity of pure love.
"This is our place," he continued, “A playground for all eternity. We can be here together forever, and nobody and nothing can come between us -- neither day or night, nor life or death." His lips parted into a crooked smile. "It's a perfect sanctuary for us."
My eyes swept the canvas of the dream. A brilliant rainbow married the sky with the ocean in a dazzling display of light. I must have drunk a magical elixir that heightened my senses. But I realized the only elixir I was intoxicated by, was love. Love for Jordan, and this new haven, our home on the beach.
He took my hand and led me across the sand, our footprints leaving tracks along the shore. The tide rolled in and lapped at my feet. Everything appeared so very real. Even the air smelled fresh and salty as it animated the beach grass among the dunes.
Jordan ascended the stairs leading to the house and beckoned for me to follow. The windows of Hathaway Hall twinkled like diamonds in the sun. When we arrived at the top, he walked to the precipice taking in the view. The lighthouse to the north gleamed as if brand new.
He turned his head, reached out and offered his hand to me. I stood beside him on the cliff, with the tide of wind rippling through us. The moment was enchanted and the panorama of Eternity Bay seemed endless. I closed my eyes to taste the air. There was a scent of jasmine there. That had been the perfume my sister often wore. When I opened my eyes, I heard a familiar voice beckoning somewhere below.
"I've been waiting for you." it called.
I leaned over, attempting to find its source, but swayed and lost my balance. Jordan reached out for me, but it was too late. I fell over the edge, plunging down to the rocks below.
I woke up in my bed drenched in sweat. My room was dark and I squinted to see the clock. It was already after midnight. I had slept most of the day, and missed my opportunity to see Jordan again. It felt like someone had drained all of the oxygen from the room. I got up to open the window and stopped. There upon my window sill, by the light of the moon, was a row of sea shells. I experienced a sensation of déjà vu as I beheld the collection before me. For it resembled the one back home in Monterey.
Jordan had been here, in my room, while I was asleep. He somehow knew, like he always did. I reached out to touch them to see if they were real. Indeed, they were, just as his love for me. In my heart I felt the warmth of his devotion.
I went upstairs to check on Cassandra. She was fast asleep. Then I heard a noise in the corner of her room that startled me. I moved closer to inspect the area. It was so dark; I parted the curtain to allow the moonlight entrance. No rodents, nothing fallen, no Devon. I smiled at the thought that I might actually glimpse her imaginary friend. Though if Jordan was dead and haunting me, why could it not be possible for my niece?
I closed the curtain and returned to my room. It was 1:30 a.m. and I couldn't fall back to sleep. I peered out my window which had a western view of the cliffs. Looking down upon the beach for a sign of Jordan, but it was empty. I felt disconnected from life. Adriana was gone, my mother no longer recognized me, Nathan had severed our relationship, and Jordan was dead. These were all unchangeable aspects of my life and I wasn't sure how to deal with them.
I thought about how the lighthouse door opened when I was with Jordan. Would it open now? I went to the front hall closet and put on my overcoat. Outside there was a chilly mist that had settled on the grounds. Everything appeared damp and sodden. I made my way hurriedly down the steps to the beach. A few minutes later I was at the lighthouse. I turned the handle, but it refused to budge. It was still locked. Had I imagined going inside and climbing those stairs?
I retraced my steps and returned to Hathaway Hall. It was too cold to remain outside. I decided to read more of my sister's journal. Taking her journal with me into the Reading Room, I once again sat down. Switching on the lamp beside me, I opened the diary to a recent entry.
March 12
Our birthday had arrived. I phoned Laura to wish her happy birthday and see how mother was doing. Unfortunately, she is now in a convalescent home. I long for the past, those days of our youth when mother and father took us to the Fair. We would have picnics and trips up the coast to Hearst Castle. But what I remembered most fondly, was the day when Laura and I travelled by train to Grandma Quincy's farm in Nebraska. Neither of us had been away from California, and taking that long train ride together was a unique experience.
I set the book down recalling my own memories of that time. It was just before Adriana had left Monterey to marry Sebastian. On our eighteenth birthday, father had purchased two train tickets for us to go out and see the world; a world so much larger than our Monterey. It was a memorable time for me, and the last time I saw my sister alive.
I flipped through the journal, pausing here and there. At one particular spot, I rested my hand on the page and got a jolt. In my mind, appeared an image of Sebastian reading the journal and dropping it to the floor. Curious, I began to read the entry.
June 25
It had been too much for me to handle, the beatings had become a regular part of my afternoons with Sebastian. I needed to escape from him and the pain of what my life had become. So each sunset, I would go down to the beach and meet with my first love. For my life was with Jordan now.
Lik
e Sebastian, I also dropped the journal to the floor as if electrocuted.
"Jordan, my Jordan?" I asked myself. Could he be the same man who was in love with my sister? I needed to get some answers.
I looked out the window and watched the sun begin to rise. Soon the library would be open and I would find an explanation, answers to my questions. What truth would I discover? What skeletons would I uncover? How had Jordan died? Would the man in the casket be the same man I met on the beach? The viewing and funeral would be at 11:30 this morning on Ellstrom Lane.
"Aunt Laura?" a voice called from behind me.
"Oh, Cassandra, you startled me." I exclaimed. I quickly hid the journal under the seat cushion as I stood up.
"What are you doing in here so early?" she asked innocently.
I looked around for some excuse.
"I got restless and couldn't sleep, so I came here to find something to read."
Her forehead crinkled into a frown.
"What about that book you got from the library?"
"Actually, I already finished that," I smiled. "In fact, I was going to return it today. Is there anything I can get for you while I'm there?"
She shook her head.
"We're still not finished with My Friend Jamison."
I regretted not spending more time with her over the weekend.
"I'm sorry, Cassandra. I've been so preoccupied. I wanted to give you some free time from your studies the last couple days, but I've neglected our reading time together."
In truth, I felt the weight of guilt upon me .
"I promise we'll read your book later on when I get back."
My niece seemed pleased by this and wandered out of the room. I took the book out from beneath the seat cushion and returned it to the desk in my bedroom. I got cleaned up, changed my clothes and by the time I was finished, the sun had already risen outside. I prepared myself some breakfast and hastily finished before I could be confronted by Nathaniel. I took my sweater from the hall closet and made my way into town.
Despite the late autumn chill, the walk was beautiful and serene. By the time I reached Main Street, it was almost eight-thirty. The library would be open in thirty minutes. I stopped at Cramer's Café, ordered a latte and took a table in the outside patio. Sipping the freshly brewed coffee both warmed my body and replenished my energy. The aroma of the cafe bakery drifted outside while the sounds of Main Street came alive with the daily routine of the quaint village. The bakery inspired me with an idea. I would surprise Cassandra later by baking a batch of chocolate chip cookies.
The town hall down the street rang nine o' clock. I left the cafe and walked down the Main Street to the library. There was a sense of dread in the pit of my stomach at what I would find there.
Inside the library, I first returned my novel and then went to the archives to look for the newspaper. It was a local press called The Vale. It took me some time to locate the correct edition. And it was just as the man in the churchyard predicted. A large story splashed across the front page. It was November 11th, the day after my sister's death. The only photograph pictured in the article was of the cliffs overlooking the bay. The headline was “The Edge of Eternity”.
I sat down and began to read.
"Late in the afternoon of November 10th, a man and woman fell to their death on the shores of Eternity Bay. There were no witnesses to the incident. However, local gossip presumes their leap to be a suicide pact between Adriana Hathaway and Jordan Harmon."
My heart performed its own leap! So they had died together last week. If only there was a photo to confirm his identity. I glanced at my watch; it was now 9:30. The viewing at the Maryvale Congregational Church would be in just two hours.
I continued reading the article, and there was mention of Leah Hathaway and Jordan's father, Charles Harmon. I would probably see the father at the church later, and any other family and friends of the deceased.
This was utterly insane like a dream, or perhaps a nightmare. Was it possible to meet a man who was in love with my sister? Not to mention, a man who had already been dead for one week.
I shivered at the thought and what it could possibly mean. Then I remembered the first time I saw him on the beach. He had said to me, 'I've been waiting for you!'
Waiting for whom? He must have thought I was Adriana. Just like the man in the car yesterday, he must have initially mistaken me for my twin. That would also account for how he knew about my sea shell collection back home. Adriana must have confided to Jordan about me.
I shook my head in amazement. This had to be the same man who loved my sister. Otherwise how else could he have come by that information?
Well, in a very short time, I would come face to face with the dead man himself. And then I would know the truth…
I placed the newspaper back on the shelf and left the library and took a different route to the church, a path that would prolong the passage of time. A couple of shops were open so I walked in and looked around. I tried on some dresses and checked out my reflection in the mirror. One particular black outfit seemed appropriate, so I purchased it and put it on over my clothes before leaving. Now I would definitely blend in at the funeral.
My watch confirmed it was already after eleven, so I headed in the direction of Ellstrom Lane. There was a school for the blind on the corner, with a tailor shop next door, and directly across the street was the church.
Prickles of goose bumps broke out on my arms as I attempted to stroll casually through the churchyard gate. There were mourners attired in black, gathering at the front door of the vestibule.
I carefully maneuvered around a couple who were signing the guest book inside. There was a group at the front of the church paying their respects. My heart sank and my legs were weak, as I urged myself forward towards the casket. It was a rich dark mahogany, laced with satin. As the people went back to their seats, I glimpsed his face. A face so familiar, it took my breath away. It was Jordan! The same man I had met on the beach and spoken with the past few days, the man who had loved my twin.
Created in the image of my sister, could I have brought him back? Was his love for her so eternal, that it could resurrect him from the dead?
Feeling weak and faint, I reached for the handle on the side of the casket for support. He was beautiful in the sweet repose of death, even after such a tragic fall. How I longed to see his eyes once more, those eyes that loved me. His wavy hair had been tamed by the hands of a mortician. He appeared to be asleep, with his hands folded casually, hands that once held me.
Tears began to blur my vision. Gently, I placed my hand on his and wept. But as I touched him, a strong vision appeared in my mind. I saw Jordan standing on the cliff with Sebastian and my sister. Sebastian was arguing with Jordan because he was secretly seeing his wife. During the fight, Jordan tripped and fell over the edge. Adriana reached out to catch him but also fell from the cliff.
That explained what really happened. It was an accident, not a murder, not a suicide pact. My previous vision revealed that Sebastian had learned the truth from my sister's journal. That must have led to the confrontation on the cliff.
Organ music began to play, so I departed from my beloved to take a seat. Voices whispered from the front row. Sounding agitated, a man asked,
"Well, where is his brother, Trent? We postponed the funeral so he could be here." The other man shook his head.
"I haven't been able to reach my son."
The latter voice must have been Jordan's father, Charles Harmon. He apparently was addressing the other man about the absence of another son.
At this point, the man from the caretaker's cottage came to the front and addressed the congregation.
"I have been asked by the father of the deceased to read a portion of a poem by Lewis Carroll titled "Dreamland". He looked down at the podium and began reading.
When midnight mists are creeping,
And al
l the land is sleeping,
Around me tread the mighty dead,
And slowly pass away.
The blaze of noonday splendor,
The twilight soft and tender,
May charm the eye: yet they shall die,
Shall die and pass away.
I see the shadows falling,
The forms of old recalling;
Around me tread the mighty dead,
And slowly pass away.
The man looked up, then cleared his throat and asked for the ushers to come forward. They closed the casket and he was silently borne away to the churchyard. I followed discreetly at a distance and watched the pastor pray an appropriate psalm. Unlike most funerals I had seen or read about, the sun burned with a brilliant irony. It was indeed a "blaze of noonday" as the poem predicted; a crisp autumn afternoon.
After the ceremony concluded, I hailed a cab and returned to Hathaway Hall. I prepared a batch of chocolate chip cookies in the kitchen. And while they baked I spent time reading with Cassandra. She was quite surprised when I brought her the plate of fresh pastries. As she surrendered herself to the desert, I quietly excused myself, withdrawing to my bedroom.
Outside the window, the sun had begun to set on the horizon. Would Jordan be there again tonight? The past week had seemed like the dreamland from that poem... “Around me tread the mighty dead.” Phantoms that only appeared when the world was fast asleep and cloaked by midnight shadows.
I thought about the two visions I had experienced when I touched him. The first one revealed us locked in an embrace on the cliffs, and the other making love upon the shore. And for the first time, I began to realize that they were not visions of the future, but of the past. I had seen Jordan with my sister in those visions. It troubled me that I did not have a future with him, but neither did Adriana.
When I had asked him if we were lovers, he had answered, "There's a part of you and I that are joined forever." He also told me, a part of our souls met long before my arrival. I thought about the connection that I shared with my twin and how inseparable ours souls were. I experienced many of her intimate thoughts and feelings. So in some spiritual way, I was already joined to Jordan through Adriana’s communion with him. That explained the connection we shared.
He had quoted the proverb, "When one shuts one eye, one does not hear everything." Together, Adriana and I were like a pair of eyes. When she died, it was like one eye being shut, and whatever I saw or heard, she could no longer perceive.
I remembered his words, "When I look at you now, I can see yesterday again." Being a mirror reflection of Adriana, I had resurrected his love for her. But did Jordan want me to continue on where her own life had ended? The thought sent a chill up my spine. But did he really see me for who I was, or was it only because I reminded him of my twin? Perhaps he never really loved me at all. The thought filled me with loss and despair. I had deluded myself into thinking he cared for me. It was only her, always Adriana that he loved. I should have realized that the moment I read my sister's journal.
I wiped the tears from my eyes and lay upon my bed. I was filled with a horrible feeling of emptiness. I had honestly believed that he had loved me. But like the sun fading in the west, the light of his love dimmed and my world grew dark with shadows.
I turned towards the window and watched as the sun slowly extinguished itself into the sea. It was a twilight world of dead lovers and broken dreams. I waited there expectantly. Would he come? Could he come? But only the night came. Except for a few stray stars, the heavens were the shade of midnight.
I paced as my mind spun questions into theories, and theories into more questions. I returned to the window and looked out into the night, to a lonely stretch of beach in the moonlight. But there was nobody there, nobody waiting for me, no one at all.
Tears filled my eyes again, and a cry escaped my lips. Just when I thought the loneliness would never end, I felt his arms around me. I looked down and saw his hands clasp together holding me. Then a voice behind me whispered in my ear,
“Laura, please don't cry. I'm here for you, and I always will be."
I turned around inside his embrace and looked into the same eyes that only hours ago had been closed forever. And yet, here before me, he stood seemingly alive and breathing.
"How can this be?" I pleaded. "I saw you in the casket this morning and you were dead."
He placed my head on his chest and I heard the rhythm of his heart.
"I'm sorry you had to find out like this. Forgive me, it’s my fault, I should have told you before, but I was afraid."
He stopped and seemed to be searching for the right words.
"What do you have to be afraid of?" I asked.
His eyes were covered with adoration.
"I was afraid of losing you." he sighed, "I thought if I told you I had been in love with Adriana, you would surely leave me."
Our thoughts were the same on that matter.
"So you're not a ghost?" I said aloud.
He stepped back and laughed.
"You thought I was a ghost?" He smiled at me. "I've been called a great many things, but never before a ghost." He moved to the window beside me, and looked out into the night.
"Do you remember when I said, ‘we have something in common that's very special’?"
I inclined my head.
"I also have an identical twin. Or I should say ‘had’. A brother named Trent."
I was stunned by this new information. Then I recalled the name mentioned at the funeral of the brother that never came.
"My brother," he continued, "was living abroad in France. He had come out to visit me for Thanksgiving. While he was here, he discovered about my relationship with a married woman. He was quite incensed, and wanted me to stop seeing her."
Jordan paused for a moment, looking deep in thought.
"What he didn't know, was that she loved me before Sebastian blinded her with all his wealth."
There was the sound of disgust in his tone.
"He threatened if I didn't end my affair that he would go and speak with Sebastian himself. Unfortunately, I didn't take him seriously. And the next day I found their bodies on the shore below the cliffs."
Jordan covered his eyes and shook with remorse.
"This was my fault, Laura. They would both be alive if I had done the right thing."
I put my arms around Jordan, trying to comfort him. Then a picture came together in my mind like a giant jigsaw puzzle. And then all at once I understood.
"I have this ability," I explained, "to see the history of a person or object just by touching them. Sebastian had already known about you from reading my sister's journal, and there's nothing you could have been done to prevent that. When he saw Trent, he thought it was you. But your brother's death was an accident. He tripped and fell, and when my sister reached out to save him, she went with him."
Jordan took me in his arms and wept. His loss of Adriana and Trent were tremendous, but the guilt he must have felt was beyond anything I could comprehend.
"A part of me died with your sister," he began. "There was nothing for me anymore; nowhere to call home. The beach was the only place, the last place that reminded me of her. I banished myself in exile for the sins I had committed. My prison was the empty lighthouse. I locked myself away there, sleeping during the day. And in the night I waited on the beach for her to come back to me."
Suddenly his eyes were upon me.
"And then you came, with her body and likeness, and I believed God had been given a second chance, that He had heard my cries and had forgiven me. To be honest, the first time I saw you wandering along the shore, I thought her spirit had come back to me. But when you introduced yourself, I realized that you were her twin sister. She often spoke of you, Laura. How much she loved and missed you."
I didn't know how many times my heart had been broken today. But I saw that Jordan was also broken, perhap
s more than I could ever be.
His face was stained with sorrow. I wished there was something I could do to help him. He sat down on my bed, pulling me with him.
"Laura, I didn't think it would be possible to love again, but I have fallen for you, so fast, so far and so deep."
A thrill shuddered through my body. All of my life, I dreamed of something like this. Someone to hold me, protect me and love me. In all of my dreams, nothing could have come close to this beautiful and lonely man before me.
"I still don't understand a few things." I sighed.
"What things?" he asked.
"The night I first met you, Cassandra never saw you from her window."
"And I never saw her," he replied, "because you were standing between us."
"And she wasn't wearing her glasses." I added. "But how did you disappear from this room?"
Jordan grinned mischievously.
"I didn't." he confided. Then standing up he quietly rolled himself under my bed.
I laughed at this. "But how did you get inside the house in the first place?"
"That was easy." he admitted standing up again. “There’s a window at the end of the hall that has a broken latch. Adriana and I would secretly meet here when Sebastian was away. "
"Now see what you've done?" I demanded. "You’ve robbed me of all this magic and mystery, so what's left?"
He encircled his arms around my waist and kissed me eagerly.
"You have me, and my love." Jordan promised. "And there's one other thing you should know, and for this you should be sitting down."
I didn't think it would be possible to be surprised any further, but I was wrong.
We both sat down on the bed and I waited expectantly.
"The other reason I stayed in the lighthouse was because I couldn't leave her." He pointed at the ceiling.
"Cassandra…" I surmised with puzzlement.
He inclined his head. "I could never leave her, because she is my daughter."
Now it was my turn to be shocked. My mouth must have dropped open, since Jordan looked so amused.
"I had that same reaction when Adriana told me a few months ago. We were still seeing each other just before she married Sebastian. And the night before her death, she promised to tell him the truth."
"So that's why Sebastian abandoned his daughter." I concluded.
"When did he leave?"
"He went back to North Carolina last week." Then I looked at him curiously. "Why didn't she tell you the truth sooner?"
"Adriana said that she didn't want to hurt me."
"Hurt you?" I repeated. "That was an utterly selfish for her to do. And as her sister, we may have shared a great many things, but I've never been attracted by wealth. It angers me that she could be so easily lured away by such foolishness. If it was me, I would never leave..."
My words stopped in midsentence.
Jordan's face was beaming as he knew what I was about to say.
"You would never leave me?" he prompted.
After a short time I nodded.
"I've never been in love before, so I wasn't sure what I was feeling for you."
"So I am your first?" he asked.
"You are my only." I confessed.
He got up to lock the door and then returned to my bed and lay down beside me. Taking my face in his hands, he caressed his lips over my mouth. And for the first time we made love. It was something truly magical that I will never forget.
And now you're probably wondering about the rest of my story. Well, it did have a happy ending. Both of us had lost the missing half of our lives over the edge of Eternity. Now we could resume the other half of our lives by uniting our souls together in love.
In the days that followed, Jordan asked for my hand in marriage and I accepted. Now that Cassandra had a new mother and father, her mysterious friend had conveniently disappeared.
The following March, we left Maryvale on a train heading north, looking forward to a promising future raising our daughter together.
THE END
Thank you for reading books on BookFrom.Net Share this book with friends