“I left early, remember? With Jonas. I haven’t had time to look at the contract yet. Audrey said it was okay, so I signed it. She negotiates for us.” I waved my hand in the air like it was no big deal. Rubbing my forehead, I had a headache forming from being awakened up too early from my rest.
“You should pay more attention to details, Miss Westing.”
I was about to tell him to call me Liz and nix the formalities when Audrey came rushing into the room.
“Liz, is there anything else you want to take to stor…” Audrey entered the room and froze in her footsteps. “What are you doing here?”
Luckily, Lonzo didn’t take her accusatory tone personally. “I’m here to escort Liz to a predetermined address today. Jonas told me, after your departure, that I was still in charge of your safety until your contract starts with Nobel Records.”
Audrey’s tight frown gave me all the information I needed to know about her relationship with Lonzo. I don’t know why they didn’t really care for each other whatsoever, but I never paid enough attention on tour to know what bothered them. Maybe there’d been a few words exchanged due to my crazy partying or something else while I was not around, but I’d never asked. Whatever happened between these two, neither had mentioned the other at all to me. Apparently, she didn’t appreciate his efforts as much as I did.
“It’s okay, Sis. I got this.” I motioned to her.
She eyed me suspiciously. “You don’t need me to go with you tonight?”
I shook my head. “I think we’ll be alright.”
She turned toward Lonzo, throwing him the stink eye.
“Well, call me if you run into any trouble.”
“Yes, Ma’am.” I gave her a salute and held in a chuckle until she spun around on her feet to return to her room. She’d been packing more stuff to put into storage since it looked like we’d be leaving this house for good when we returned to work with Nobel Records. I hadn’t settled down as much as she had. My life fit in several duffle bags and suitcases, already packed and sitting next to the couch. Most of my stuff consisted of musical instruments, notebooks, hordes of clothes, shoes, and gobs of make-up. I was efficient in packing my mess faster than Audrey.
I think she was just lamenting too much while she packed. It slowed her down.
“She’s a fiery pistol, no?” Lonzo laughed and made his way to one of the couches in the living room. Tossing his cowboy hat to the side and crossing one leg over a thigh, I got a good look at a nice pair of expensive, broken in cowboy boots. I’d never seen him so relaxed and out of his usual character outfit. He’d traded in the usual black slacks for a pair of form fitting faded jeans along with a plaid button up shirt.
“Yeah, that’s Audrey all right. I want to know why you’re here too, besides the security thing.” I sat in a chair across from him, waiting for him to spit it out.
“An ulterior motive? I have none. There’s nothing I have to hide.” He leaned forward, threading his fingers together. “But, now that I’m here, you won’t feel so out of place when you go to the address I gave you earlier.”
“What’s there that you want me to see? What’s so important about it?”
“You’ll see. Look, I know you’re heading there later, and I thought it’d be best if I went with you.”
“Why?”
“You might not like what you find.”
“So why send me there in the first place?”
He wrinkled his eyebrows, looking genuinely concerned. This worried me. I started twisting my hands together.
“It’s best if you see it all for yourself.”
“Well, that sounds reassuring.”
He laughed and relaxed again, leaning back into the sofa. “You can thank me later. It’s the answer to all your problems, believe me.”
Why did that not make me feel any better?
I rolled my eyes and jumped to my feet.
“Want a beer? We just picked up some groceries.”
He nodded, the corners of his mouth barely curling up before he looked out the window. He was adrift in his own thoughts, already lost to this room. I never wondered much about Lonzo. His role in this mess was always defined as one of our bodyguards. I seriously never considered he could have a life outside of it or the Cartel. It made me wonder if he did.
I headed to the kitchen for the drinks.
“Have you heard from Emilio?” I yelled back as I popped the tops off both bottles. Returning to the living room, I handed him one before I got comfortable on my armchair once more.
“No.”
He threw back a long swallow, savoring the taste of the beer before his gaze met mine. His expression was a wealth of inaccessible knowledge. His apathy frustrated me, and that was how he always came off when we’d been on tour—just always there, watching, seeing everything, and knowing more than anyone should. What did those dark eyes hide? Now that I thought about it, he probably knew everything I could ever imagine asking about, especially about the Esperanza brothers.
And what did he know about me and Audrey? I shuddered to think about it. That could be good or also be a really bad thing.
“I thought you were the best of friends.”
“There’s no friends in this business.”
Okay then…I swallowed hard and tapped my fingernails on the cool glass of my beer.
“You know what I think?”
“What’s that, Miss Westing?” He leaned forward, placing his empty beer bottle onto a coaster on the coffee table. His eyes flicked back up to me, drilling into me like obsidian blades. It had me squirming in my chair some, unnerving me with every second those eyes remained fixed on me.
“I think you do know and you just don’t want to tell me a fucking thing.” I gulped down another swallow of beer and gave him a hard stare. I didn’t believe him. His amused expression made my blood boil for some reason, so this feeling that he was hiding stuff couldn’t be too far off the middle. I didn’t want to be a player in some game that only Lonzo knew how to play. I was done with games.
“All in good time, Miss Westing. You’ll know everything I do, all in good time.”
Chapter Fifty-Four
Audrey
I eyed Lonzo sitting in our living room and downing beer like there was no tomorrow. He obviously drank a lot because after drinking most of the twelve pack we’d bought earlier, he was as sober as I was without drinking a thing. Even so, I couldn’t shake the feeling that he was up to no good. I tried to let it roll off my back, but it wasn’t easy. I shoved dishes into boxes and folded the last of the laundry, but found myself glancing his way every time I passed the living room.
Something was off about this whole thing, and I contemplated begging Liv to not go with him to wherever it was they were going to, but I knew she wouldn’t have it. There was no stopping my sister when she set her sights on something. She’d get tunnel vision, focusing until there was nothing between her and her goals. It was a tragic trait for her. It’d been the source of so many heartbreaks.
I wondered if she got that from my mother or my father. Was I so one track minded?
Taping shut another box, I called out to Liv so she could help me put the last few boxes into the station wagon and I could then swing by our storage unit before sunset. The furniture was going to be put into storage later, but most of our belongings, which were almost all boxed away, were already stored. It was bittersweet labeling the cardboard with a sharpie. I didn’t want to leave this place. It was full of happy memories of me and Saul together.
The memory of him froze me in a daze. I missed him immensely, though it’d just been less than a day. I wanted him here with me. Through the sharp ache that threatened to seize the beating of my heart, I breathed through the pain. He wasn’t here, and it was all my fault. Why had I hurt him so much? I’d never done that to anyone before. Why Saul?
I shut my burning eyes as I realized the exact reason why. I was afraid. I’d been afraid of him the moment I’d laid eyes on him. He wa
s the opposite of toxic—full of life, loving and caring. How he could even exist in this cruel world was a miracle. He’d done nothing but love me, and I’d taken it and smeared it across his face like week old sandwiches. I’d let the beautiful flower of our love rot in my hands, and I’d watched it wither before my very eyes.
I just wanted to go back to the way it was. That was the only thing I could wish for at this second. I was so insanely stupid, and I hated myself to the core. I was a horrible person; nothing anyone could tell me could prove otherwise. I wish they could, but that didn’t change things. It couldn’t, and I should’ve been happy Saul was even wanting to speak to me after everything I’d done.
He didn’t have to give me that. He could’ve walked away and never turned back, never said another word to me ever again. I’d give anything—this rock and roll life, the music, the roaring crowds, and the fame—just to have him at my side again.
“You’re looking more defeated than your sister.”
I jumped and spun around to find Lonzo leaning on the doorway to the kitchen. He held two empty bottles in his hand and was using his free arm to hold himself on the door way.
“The fuck…You scared the shit out of me!” I frowned, giving him a death glare sharper than I’d thrown his way before.
“I was being as loud as possible, seeing that you were lost in your thoughts. A train could sneak up on you.” He chuckled and made his way toward the recycling bin on one end of the kitchen. After dumping the bottles in, he then helped himself to another ice cold bottle of beer.
“Maybe you can pick up beer on your way back here tonight. You’ve drained the ones I bought today,” I muttered loud enough for him to hear me. He popped the top off and took a loud and obvious slurp from it. His cool ‘ahhh’ dug at my core, and I pushed off the ground to stare him down. I wanted to hit something, and he was looking like a pretty good punching bag.
“What’s wrong, Miss Westing?” He cocked his chin toward me and threw me a wicked smile. “Now you look like you’re either going to kiss me or kill me.” He took another swift swig before adding, “I’d rather it be the first than the latter, but either would be fine with me.”
I dug my fingers into my palms and exhaled hard through my mouth. He wanted me to start something. That had to be it. Before I could give him what he wanted, I bent down and grabbed the box at my feet, its weight feeling feather light with my fury surging though me.
“Fuck off, Lonzo,” I spat and made my way out the side door to the station wagon. It was unlocked, and I dumped the box into the massive back seat.
“Here…” I turned around and almost ran over Lonzo, who was standing with a box of dishes. I glowered at the man, wanting to swipe the box from his hands and tell him another set of expletives. I wished he would just get out of my face. His presence was unnerving and didn’t do anything to lift my drowned mood.
I snatched the box from his fingers and didn’t even tell him thank you.
“I’m sorry if I offended you, Audrey.”
Bewildered, I craned my head toward him, peering through my locks to see him looking serious. I wondered why he was apologizing. It was against his usual nature.
“What?”
I straightened, feeling my bones creak from all the lifting of boxes and not using my proper body mechanics as much as I should. Tomorrow was going to be excruciating.
“I said, I’m sorry…for everything.”
He took a moment to let it sink in before he headed back into the house. Only the slam of the screen door broke my quantified daze.
“What was that about?”
I shook my head, baffled. If anyone could still leave me confused and blindsided, it was Lonzo. He even topped Liz. I couldn’t for the life of me figure him out. He was as transparent as a wall.
I shut the door to the station wagon and huffed out a long, relaxing breath. Soon enough, we’d be free from Lonzo and Jonas, from Emilio and all of their psychotic entourage that held a frightening edge to our lives. I couldn’t wait for that day. Couldn’t wait another second.
Heading back inside, I found Liz pulling on a faded black denim vest over her fitted black camisole. Form fitting ripped jeans that showed off more skin than they covered hugged her long legs. Black combat boots finished off her look, including some last minute makeup to keep her from looking as tired as I felt. She looked stunning, like a young Joan Jett. I gave her a loving smile.
“Heading out now, Sis?”
She returned my smile, but hers looked much brighter and less jaded than mine.
“Yep. Lonzo and I are heading out.” She pressed a small folded paper into the palm of my hand before pulling me in for a tight hug. “This is the address if I’m not back soon.”
Her words terrified me.
“Be careful,” I whispered.”
“I will. I’ll see you later, okay?”
“Okay.” I watched her as she stepped away. The loss of her warmth and familiar scent, like a faded perfume mixed with a sweet laundry softener smell, left me feeling cold. I hoped she knew what she was getting into. Sometimes morbid thoughts crossed my mind at times like these. What if that was the last hug I’d get from her? What if when she walked out that door, she’d never come back, like our father?
She reminded me of our father in so many ways. What would our mother say to that?
I gulped and waved goodbye to her, and even gave a small wave toward Lonzo, who tipped his vaquero hat toward me and winked. They clunked down the steps of our humble home and stuffed themselves into Lonzo’s rental SUV.
As they turned down the road and around the corner, off on a new adventure, I hoped our lives would come to a nice, calm mode soon. There was just so much we could take, and I was at the bottom of my bottle. I hoped I wouldn’t be needed anytime soon by anyone but Saul, for I was empty and my soul was in dire need of filling back up.
I watched their vehicle until it faded away and I could no longer hear the engine. Shutting the screen door behind me, I stood in the middle of the living room and peered around.
This fork in the road was looking more like a devil’s crossroads with every second passing.
Chapter Fifty-Five
Liv
The quaint Los Angeles house Lonzo brought us to reminded me of the nice older neighborhoods in the area, the ones that sported peeling paint off the sidings and stood elevated up on stilts, with creaky stairs and sunken backyards in the rear of the homes. It looked pretty classic for the time period, but was larger than the other houses lining the hill of a street. Wrought iron crowned the breezeblock walls and matched the design throughout the alleyway where the houses faced and ran down a hill toward a busier road, out into the open traffic of the L.A. rush.
Several cars were parked along the curve where the house sat, right in the middle of a sharp turn. It got me wondering how many times cars had crashed while trying to make the curve before jumping onto the steep drive that ran all the way down the hill. I shuddered as we walked past it toward the towering house.
“Liv?”
“Yeah?” I crossed my arms, feeling a slight chill run through me.
“Remember what I said. You’re just a girl I’m seeing. Don’t ask about Emilio. Don’t say you know him, or it’ll blow your cover. Don’t even say your name.”
“Well, shit, Lonzo. What sort of place are you taking me to?” I whispered harshly as I reached out and grabbed his arm. He just as easily grabbed my hand and wove it roughly through his fingers, then dropped it so we were walking like a couple. I gulped. I didn’t like this one bit, but we were at the door already and he was knocking on it hard.
No turning back now.
Hurried footsteps approached before they paused, obviously peering through the peek hole. A tense moment passed, and I consciously made an effort to come off as relaxed. Anyone would be able to see through the tension building from the throbbing jugular vein that liked to pop out of the side of my neck when I was stressed. I shook out my hair with
my free hand to cover it just as the door creaked open.
“Alonzo, querido! Que estas aciendo aqui?”
The Spanish was beautiful, but I didn’t understand one tiny bit of it. Already, the little that Emilio had tried to teach me had slid off my brain cells like beads of water.
“Hola, Mariana. I’m just stopping by to pick up some things for Emilio.”
“Sí, sí.” Mariana bobbed her head up and down before landing her eyes on me. “And your Amiga?”
“This is my girlfriend, Lisa.” He held out his arm to introduce me, and I gave her a shy smile, not knowing what to say.
“Hi,” I eventually said.
“Come in, please. So good to meet you, Lisa.” Mariana’s warm welcome with a thick Spanish accent made her harmless in my book. She continued to smile as she dragged us in, locking the door behind us. I was somewhat reassured, but my apprehension still lingered.
I took in the quaint living room, large for a house in this part of L.A. It had modest décor, two overstuffed dark green sofas in an L shape along one wall, across from a moderately sized flat screen TV and wooden coffee table. A long dining table in the next room over was lined in mismatched chairs with seating for what looked like ten or more. Colorful walls filled the place with a homey lived in feeling, a lot more authentic Hispanic décor throughout—more than I’d seen in any house I’d ever been in.
“I’m heading to the store room. Please let me know if anyone stops by.”
Mariana nodded toward Lonzo. I wished I knew what that pregnant look passing between them meant.
“I’ll fix you guys a plate. We’re having dinner soon.” Lonzo nodded and turned toward the rear of the long hall before us as Mariana headed off toward the kitchen past the dining room.
“Come on.” He squeezed my hand and tugged for me to follow. I swore my feet felt like lead. There was something going on that I wasn’t aware of, and I wondered what would’ve happened if I’d come here alone, saying I was Emilio’s girlfriend and all.