bed yet; pray let me see you again."
I took this time to undress me, and to come in a new dress, which was,in a manner, _une dishabille_, but so fine, and all about me so cleanand so agreeable, that he seemed surprised. "I thought," says he, "youcould not have dressed to more advantage than you had done before; butnow," says he, "you charm me a thousand times more, if that bepossible."
"It is only a loose habit, my lord," said I, "that I may the better waiton your Highness." He pulls me to him. "You are perfectly obliging,"says he; and, sitting on the bedside, says he, "Now you shall be aprincess, and know what it is to oblige the gratefullest man alive;" andwith that he took me in his arms.... I can go no farther in theparticulars of what passed at that time, but it ended in this, that, inshort, I lay with him all night.
I have given you the whole detail of this story to lay it down as ablack scheme of the way how unhappy women are ruined by great men; for,though poverty and want is an irresistible temptation to the poor,vanity and great things are as irresistible to others. To be courted bya prince, and by a prince who was first a benefactor, then an admirer;to be called handsome, the finest woman in France, and to be treated asa woman fit for the bed of a prince--these are things a woman must haveno vanity in her, nay, no corruption in her, that is not overcome by it;and my case was such that, as before, I had enough of both.
I had now no poverty attending me; on the contrary, I was mistress often thousand pounds before the prince did anything for me. Had I beenmistress of my resolution, had I been less obliging, and rejected thefirst attack, all had been safe; but my virtue was lost before, and thedevil, who had found the way to break in upon me by one temptation,easily mastered me now by another; and I gave myself up to a person who,though a man of high dignity, was yet the most tempting and obligingthat ever I met with in my life.
I had the same particular to insist upon here with the prince that I hadwith my gentleman before. I hesitated much at consenting at firstasking, but the prince told me princes did not court like other men;that they brought more powerful arguments; and he very prettily addedthat they were sooner repulsed than other men, and ought to be soonercomplied with; intimating, though very genteely, that after a woman hadpositively refused him once, he could not, like other men, wait withimportunities and stratagems, and laying long sieges; but as such men ashe stormed warmly, so, if repulsed, they made no second attacks; and,indeed, it was but reasonable; for as it was below their rank to be longbattering a woman's constancy, so they ran greater hazards in beingexposed in their amours than other men did.
I took this for a satisfactory answer, and told his Highness that I hadthe same thoughts in respect to the manner of his attacks; for that hisperson and his arguments were irresistible; that a person of his rankand a munificence so unbounded could not be withstood; that no virtuewas proof against him, except such as was able, too, to suffermartyrdom; that I thought it impossible I could be overcome, but thatnow I found it was impossible I should not be overcome; that so muchgoodness, joined with so much greatness, would have conquered a saint;and that I confessed he had the victory over me, by a merit infinitelysuperior to the conquest he had made.
He made me a most obliging answer; told me abundance of fine things,which still flattered my vanity, till at last I began to have prideenough to believe him, and fancied myself a fit mistress for a prince.
As I had thus given the prince the last favour, and he had all thefreedom with me that it was possible for me to grant, so he gave meleave to use as much freedom with him another way, and that was to haveeverything of him I thought fit to command; and yet I did not ask of himwith an air of avarice, as if I was greedily making a penny of him, butI managed him with such art that he generally anticipated my demands. Heonly requested of me that I would not think of taking another house, asI had intimated to his Highness that I intended, not thinking it goodenough to receive his visits in; but he said my house was the mostconvenient that could possibly be found in all Paris for an amour,especially for him, having a way out into three streets, and notoverlooked by any neighbours, so that he could pass and repass withoutobservation; for one of the back-ways opened into a narrow dark alley,which alley was a thoroughfare or passage out of one street intoanother; and any person that went in or out by the door had no more todo but to see that there was nobody following him in the alley before hewent in at the door. This request, I knew, was reasonable, and thereforeI assured him I would not change my dwelling, seeing his Highness didnot think it too mean for me to receive him in.
He also desired me that I would not take any more servants or set up anyequipage, at least for the present; for that it would then beimmediately concluded I had been left very rich, and then I should bethronged with the impertinence of admirers, who would be attracted bythe money, as well as by the beauty of a young widow, and he should befrequently interrupted in his visits; or that the world would conclude Iwas maintained by somebody, and would be indefatigable to find out theperson; so that he should have spies peeping at him every time he wentout or in, which it would be impossible to disappoint; and that heshould presently have it talked over all the toilets in Paris that thePrince de ---- had got the jeweller's widow for a mistress.
This was too just to oppose, and I made no scruple to tell his Highnessthat, since he had stooped so low as to make me his own, he ought tohave all the satisfaction in the world that I was all his own; that Iwould take all the measures he should please to direct me to avoid theimpertinent attacks of others; and that, if he thought fit, I would bewholly within doors, and have it given out that I was obliged to go toEngland to solicit my affairs there, after my husband's misfortune, andthat I was not expected there again for at least a year or two. This heliked very well; only he said that he would by no means have meconfined; that it would injure my health, and that I should then take acountry-house in some village, a good way off of the city, where itshould not be known who I was, and that he should be there sometimes todivert me.
I made no scruple of the confinement, and told his Highness no placecould be a confinement where I had such a visitor, and so I put off thecountry-house, which would have been to remove myself farther from himand have less of his company; so I made the house be, as it were, shutup. Amy, indeed, appeared, and when any of the neighbours and servantsinquired, she answered, in broken French, that I was gone to England tolook after my affairs, which presently went current through the streetsabout us. For you are to note that the people of Paris, especially thewomen, are the most busy and impertinent inquirers into the conduct oftheir neighbours, especially that of a single woman, that are in theworld, though there are no greater intriguers in the universe thanthemselves; and perhaps that may be the reason of it, for it is an oldbut a sure rule, that
"When deep intrigues are close and shy, The guilty are the first that spy."
Thus his Highness had the most easy, and yet the most undiscoverable,access to me imaginable, and he seldom failed to come two or threenights in a week, and sometimes stayed two or three nights together.Once he told me he was resolved I should be weary of his company, andthat he would learn to know what it was to be a prisoner; so he gave outamong his servants that he was gone to ----, where he often wenta-hunting, and that he should not return under a fortnight; and thatfortnight he stayed wholly with me, and never went out of my doors.
Never woman in such a station lived a fortnight in so complete a fulnessof human delight; for to have the entire possession of one of the mostaccomplished princes in the world, and of the politest, best-bred man;to converse with him all day, and, as he professed, charm him all night,what could be more inexpressibly pleasing, and especially to a woman ofa vast deal of pride, as I was?
To finish the felicity of this part, I must not forget that the devilhad played a new game with me, and prevailed with me to satisfy myselfwith this amour, as a lawful thing; that a prince of such grandeur andmajesty, so infinitely superior to me, and one who had made such anintroduction by an unparalleled bounty, I coul
d not resist; and,therefore, that it was very lawful for me to do it, being at that timeperfectly single, and unengaged to any other man, as I was, mostcertainly, by the unaccountable absence of my first husband, and themurder of my gentleman who went for my second.
It cannot be doubted but that I was the easier to persuade myself of thetruth of such a doctrine as this when it was so much for my ease and forthe repose of my mind to have it be so:--
"In things we wish, 'tis easy to deceive; What we would have, we willingly believe."
Besides, I had no casuists to resolve this doubt; the same devil thatput this into my head bade me go to any of the Romish clergy, and, underthe pretence of confession, state the case exactly, and I should seethey would either resolve it to be no sin at all or absolve me upon theeasiest penance. This I had a strong inclination to try, but I know notwhat scruple put me off of it, for I