Why did they always end like that. Just when either Chris or I were about to reveal the truth they would stop. I was the White Rose and I knew those stories Traci and Adam had tried to tell me were about me, but for some reason I didn't want to know what they said, nor did I want to believe they were anything more than children's fairytales.
Walter looked so happy standing there holding one of his sons with his arm wrapped around Traci's waist. What would it be like when Chris wrapped his arm around my waist like that. Would he look at me the way Walter did Traci? I wanted so much to know the kind of love I felt every time Chris looked at me in my dreams. The love we shared drove the world, anything was possible if I only believed when he was with me.
The girls... my daughters, but not my daughters. I didn't understand I knew I hadn't given birth to either of them, yet I also knew I was their genetic mother as surely as if they had come from my womb. That raised another question in that I was born male with male reproductive organs, how was it possible for me to have a womb since only genetic females had wombs.
So many questions and no idea where to look for the answers.
The Private came in while I was talking with Traci and when the dream stopped again I suggested we get out of there and I'd treat them to a steak dinner if they knew of a good steak house somewhere that would make it so I didn't miss my plane.
It appeared Traci had taken a cab to get to the base to meet Walter since they didn't have a car there to get back home. I didn't think anything about sharing the car General Long made available to me since I didn't need anywhere near the room it afforded.
I let Traci and Walter get in first and asked Private Hampton to take us to whatever restaurant served the best steak he knew of off base. I was supposed to be on leave and the last thing I wanted was to spend anymore of my leave time on a military base then was necessary.
When we pulled up at the restaurant Private Hampton chose I would have sworn we were still on base from all the uniforms until I realized those uniforms weren't like any military uniform I had ever seen, and were uniforms the restaurant asked their employees to wear.
“Do you have a reservations Captain?” the maître d asked.
“I had no idea what to do so said to look under Waters, Captain Samuel Waters.”
“Yes of course Captain Waters a table for four. We're running a little slow this evening, but should have your table ready in just a few minutes, if you wouldn't mind waiting in the lounge someone will let you know when your table is ready.” the maître d said.
I got a look from Walter and Traci that spoke of total disbelief, and Private Hampton I was sure would need to be scrape off the floor, since he was the one who picked out this restaurant.
In the lounge I ordered a drink and offered to buy one for both Walter and Traci and told Private Hampton if he wanted a coke or other soft drink I didn't have a problem, but since he was our driver I wouldn't tolerate him having anything with alcohol in it. I saw a pool table sitting off in a corner and asked if anyone wanted to shoot some pool with me and had Private Hampton jump up and say he always did want to try beating an officer at something.
“I hope you take it ease at least for the first couple shots, I haven't shot any pool since OCS and even then I was more a novice than anything,” I said.
“I promise I won't run the table on you sir, beyond that I can't make any promises,” Private Hampton said.
We flipped a coin to see who would break and he won so I racked the balls and apparently did that all wrong too.
“You sure you know how to play this game Captain?” he asked.
“To be honest, no, I'm not sure, at least I'm not sure how to rack the balls. I didn't think it mattered other than where the eight ball was in the rack,” I said.
“Well sir it kind of really doesn't matter, but I had a pro shooter once tell me you should be able to count going down the rack skipping a row as you went. So the one ball should be the first ball followed by the nine and ten balls then the two eight and three followed by the eleven four twelve five thirteen and so on. I been doing it that way ever since,” he said.
“I'll keep that in mind whenever I shoot pool in the future,” I said.
I tightened and centered the rack lifting it off the table and watched as the balls tightened up even more. Surely I was seeing things to imagine the balls tightening up when I took the rack off, but I didn't think it wise to say anything since it appeared I was the only one who had seen it.
Private Hampton took careful aim and the game was under way. He put both a solid and stripe ball in on the break and since the solid fell first declared himself solids. It didn't matter to me since I was busy studying each shot as the cue ball stopped rolling. He made a couple more shots, then missed leaving me with what appeared to be no shot if you took the cushions out of the equation.
I looked over the table and picked out the shot I wanted and started calling the shot along with which ball I would be shooting at next. As I lined up the shot I saw the ball moving along the trajectory and made the shot when my vision of the cue ball stopped where I wanted.
Private Hampton watched as the cue ball did just what I had seen it doing when I lined up the shot and I moved around to the next shot and called it and the shot after. Again I watched as everything I wanted happened and drew back and shot. I made it to the eight ball and figured on just getting all the balls off the table at the same time since I knew our table would be ready before the last ball dropped.
After I made the shot I told Private Hampton I guessed I hadn't lost anything in not playing for so long after all, but it was time for dinner our table was ready. I shot the cue ball and set the cue I had back in the rack and turned to Walter and Traci and let them know our table was ready.
“Sir, I don't mean to seem confused but how did you do that?” Private Hampton asked.
“Do what Private? You mean the shot? I don't know, I can just see what the balls are going to do when I line up the shots, when I know it's right I shoot. Don't feel bad the guys at OCS refused to play with me after the first few times I did that,” I said.
“I guess the stories I heard about you are true then,” he said.
“What stories are those?” I asked.
“That there ain't nothin' you can't do. I even heard tell you brung a guy back to life once,” he said.
“Don't put to much stock in those stories. I think the man I was supposed to have brought back to life was someone who over exerted himself and collapsed from heat exhaustion. What I did anyone with basic first aid knowledge could have done,” I said.
“What about those stories about the guys you saved what was trapped behind enemy lines. Them stories was in the news,” he said.
“I did what I was trained to do. Anyone with the training I've had could have done the same thing. I'm sorry Private, but all I did was my job, and I caught a few lucky breaks along the way,” I said.
“You're still a hero to a lot a folk I imagine,” he said.
“That he is Private. We had almost given up and probably wouldn't have lasted two more days if Captain Waters and his recon team hadn't shown up when they did,” Walter said.
“Sir? You was among them trapped?” Private Hampton asked.
“After General Long and his staff were either wounded or killed it left me in command until Captain Waters arrived. The Captain is a strategist like few others when it comes to battle. He knew just what to do and saved us all. I know you don't like hearing that Captain, but there wasn't a man there that wouldn't agree. We were all dead and we knew it, then you showed up with your men and everything changed, we had a chance,” Walter said.
The server came around and I ordered a steak for all of us even ordering it the way we each preferred never once asking anyone how they wanted their steak cooked.
I closed my eyes and again the dream closed in and I just let it, everything else moved out and the dream was all there was, this time different
in that I felt I was really there not watching from a distance.