I was angry. Even when I lost Seth, I hadn’t been this angry. How could they be so stupid, so careless?
Tears of rage ran down my face as I drove north on the old highway. It was careless, but I dared every face-eater to come against me now. I would kill them all.
The road was clear except for a pile-up of cars that I was swiftly approaching. There were quite a few of those bastards milling around the rusted metal.
Freaks.
I had their attention by the time I rolled to a stop and was pulling my knife before I stepped out of the cab. The first freak that came within range got my knife shoved into its eye socket, the blade sliding into its brain. I kicked its dead body from me to watch it tumble into the ditch, ready for the next one.
Systematically, I moved from freak to freak, killing them all and pushing their bodies off the road. Tears were streaming down my cheeks in hatred, rage and pain, but I didn't slow. They were watching me with those red eyes, not able to process the thought that would clue them in on their mortal danger. Looks of cold curiosity were silenced by my knife. I didn't stop till they were all lying dead in the drainage ditch.
I cried.
The destruction helped calm my rage but uncovered the pain. For a moment, I wondered why I should keep going. Everyone that I ever loved was dead and everyone else would die eventually. Who was left for me to keep going for? Myself? Was that a strong enough reason to keep moving forward?
I choked on my sobs and spit out a mouthful of blood. Apparently I had bitten my tongue in my fury.
Pulling at the edge of my shirt, I wiped the blade of my knife against it, cleaning it of blood, and then peeled the shirt off to toss it on top of the bodies. I always wore double layers as a precaution. This would not be the first time I had discarded a ruined garment.
The walk back to the SUV was done with slow, wavering steps, my thoughts again drifting to Walter and his Misses. Walt couldn’t do it for Emma, but could I do it for Joss?
A wave of memories rushed me, swirling through my thoughts until they stole the strength from my knees, and my steps faltered. My last moments with Seth replayed themselves in my mind, and now that I was facing the same situation with Joss, I was grateful that Seth had not put that burden on me. Within the haze of the painful memory, my decision was made. I had to do it. This was no life. Joss wouldn’t want to be left like that. Not with the chance he could take an innocent life. I wouldn’t let Joss become a mindless killer.
At least I knew the end of my current road but not what I would do once this task was done. I didn't want to think that far ahead. This wouldn't be the first time I had been in this position, and I didn't want to face it again.
I climbed back into the SUV and continued down the road.
The town wasn't far ahead. Jeremy hadn't told me where he'd lost Joss and Becky, but I figured it would have been in one of the first buildings coming into the little town. That didn't leave a lot of choices.
I parked in the middle of the road in front of an old bar. That was as good a place as any. As I walked around the Murano, I was eying the building with apprehension. My stomach was rolling in nauseous waves, and I had to stop to collect myself for a moment before I soldiered on.
Then the door of the gas station burst open, and I jumped back in shock, my knife already instinctively in my hand. My first thought was a freak was on the attack, but then he called my name before stumbling to the ground.
"Ali!"
Everything inside me froze. My mouth went dry. He wasn’t turned yet. How long had it been? How long did it take?
Hesitantly, I started forward, not knowing what I would find when I got to him. He lurched to his feet again, calling to me. I couldn't hold myself back any longer and broke into a run.
"Joss!" I yelled, tears streaming down my face. My mind was full of chatter, pleading with any god anywhere that he was okay.
And then we were together, his arms thrown around me so tightly he knocked the wind out of me, and he was sobbing. I grasped him just as hard, never wanting to let him go. He was weak and pulled me off balance. As he sank to his knees, I went down with him, the two of us collapsing in the parking lot of the old bar.
"I never thought I'd see you again,” he said through his sobs, and I held him tight while he caught his breath.
"I never should have left you. I'm sorry. I'm so sorry." My own voice cracked, and I truly hated myself for leaving him. He pulled away from me then, wiping the tears and snot from his face.
"I got bit, and I was really sick." He mumbled as he looked at me. My eyes widened in surprise, and he immediately shook his head, not understanding my look of shock. "I feel much better now."
I grabbed his face in my hands and held him still as I stared at him. His eyes were green. Beautiful, emerald green.
Everything I knew in this world changed in that moment. I fell backwards, stunned. I couldn't even breathe to speak as Joss stared at me in utter confusion.
"Am I still dying?" he whispered. Frightened by my reaction, he immediately assumed the worst.
"No!" I nearly yelled as I grabbed him and pulled him back to me. "No, no, no!" I got out more firmly, and I started laughing and sobbing at the same time. "You're going to live!"
He collapsed against me in relief. "Promise me you'll never leave me again?"
"I promise, Joss,” I said softly, calming down a little, though my heart still thumped against my chest. "I promise you I'll never leave you again."
We sat like that for a long time, embraced awkwardly in the parking lot. The noise we had made brought quite a crowd, as I knew it would, but Joss didn't realize it until he raised his head.
"Ali,” he said in hushed tones, catching sight of the freaks that had come to investigate the noise. I looked around, only seeing a handful. I remained uneasy as I always did around the freaks, but I wasn't scared.
"It's okay,” I said simply and calmly. "They won't hurt you now."
"What?" he gasped, not understanding me and clearly not put at ease.
"You and I, we're both infected." I stared at him, waiting for him to take in what I was saying. "We've both been bitten, but we were infected the right way,” I said, using Walt's terminology.
I held up my right arm to show him the scars of the bite. His wide green eyes looked from it, back to me, and then back to the freaks that circled us. "How?" he asked, but I had no answer for that.
"I don't know. I thought I was the only one for a long time." I shrugged. The panic lingered in his eyes, but I felt him relax a little bit. I continued, wanting to get away from the crowd as well. "Can you stand?"
He nodded slowly. "I think so."
I stood, pulling him up beside me and helping to support his weight. "If you move slowly, they won't react at all. They think we're one of them."
I felt him shudder and understood how he was feeling. It took me a very long time to come to terms with it myself. I didn't know how well he was going to take this news.
"Do you have a place here you can rest while you get your strength back?" I asked him.
The expression of pain he turned to me broke my heart.
"Becky,” he said, pointing toward the bar.
I nodded solemnly, knowing that Becky had already turned. I asked instead, "What about the gas station?"
"I didn't get to look around the whole place, but I didn't see anything while I was in there."
"Alright then, we'll rest there." I nodded and helped him walk to the building. He leaned heavily on me, one arm wrapped around my waist as he limped along, but I didn't think he was doing it just because he was weak.
I didn't mind. I needed him too.