Read The Shepherd Page 9


  “That’s good news, kid. I got some good news of my own. Thought you might like to know I got that maintenance job at RSC.”

  Dark dread settled in my gut. My visions are never wrong, but I had conveniently forgotten this one. “Really? I thought they hired someone else?”

  “Well they did, but he’s out on sick leave. I guess there was an accident with a backhoe. You gotta be real careful with them hydraulics. They have all that stored energy, real dangerous if you don’t know what you’re doin.”

  Shit! It already happened! Instant guilt hit me. I had known about it and done nothing. I didn’t even go to RSC to see if I could figure out who the man was. “That’s a … cool. But be careful Dad. Keep an eye out for those killer hydraulics.”

  My Dad had a real job. That was a good thing right? And the guy probably wouldn’t have listened to me anyway, even if I knew who he was. But that dread stuck in my belly. I had allowed a man to be hurt badly, when I had possessed the foreknowledge to prevent it.

  Later that evening, lying in bed with my guilt, Nadia slipped in my window. This had become her routine, and was the real reason I declined Anita’s invitation to sneak in her window. I looked forward to Nadia’s visits. She made my otherwise boring life colorful.

  She caught me as I drifted off to sleep. I woke to her cool hands sliding under my shirt.

  One of the weirder things I had noticed, Nadia always had to be touching me. Her hands, arms, and many times her entire body would be wrapped around me, sliding over my back and chest, wherever she could catch skin on skin contact. I had read somewhere that certain autistics have an abnormal need to touch, that tactile sensation. I found it relaxing. Free back rubs.

  I kinda assumed this was one of her quirks. And we were so close, it didn’t seem to matter. I figured she must have issues if she was a runaway.

  Basically I was her catnip. I could wake up any time of the night to find her nuzzling all over me. Though I never tried, I already knew she’d do whatever I wanted. This girl was no virgin, and she had zero modesty about being in my bed with very little clothes on.

  I had no intention of putting her to the test. I didn’t want to feel like I was taking advantage of her, even though she kept leaving me money.

  But I always wondered how this girl could come and go whenever, sleep in bed with a sixteen year old boy, and never once have an issue with parents or attend school.

  As I lay there, her cool hands sliding around me, I decided to just ask. “Nadia, are you awake?” I knew she was, but I had to start somewhere.

  She popped her head up from underneath the covers to look me in the eyes, “Yes.”

  “So ... what’s up with your parents? Are you a runaway or what? You don’t have to worry. I’m not gonna call the cops. I just want to know.”

  She hesitated a moment. “They’re dead. I live on my own. I have for a long time now.”

  I tried to imagine how difficult that was at her age, what she must be going through. “You’re welcome to stay here anytime, as long as we keep it on the downlow with my Dad.”

  “Thank you.” She smirked, one of those patronizing looks.

  The brat already knew I’d never turn her away. Just placating me. “And what about school? Why don’t you go to school?”

  She sat up a little higher, putting her nose to mine, staring me down. “What can they teach me that I don’t already know?”

  “Reading, writing, math, history, you know, all the important stuff.”

  “Oooh, all the important stuff. Whatever shall I do without the important stuff?” She mocked me. Then she snorted in my face, so close we were almost kissing. “Maybe you haven’t noticed, but I do fine without school. I read as well as anyone, probably better than you, and the rest of it doesn’t mean anything to me.”

  I could see huge gaping holes in her logic, but instead of tearing her apart, I followed her down the same road. “So what is important?”

  “You are.”

  “That’s flattering.” It was actually, very flattering. “Only me? That sounds boring. I’ll admit I’m pretty fly for a white guy, and handsome too, but I can’t be all that interesting.”

  She giggled, rubbing her nose on my chest. Then those cat eyes of hers took hold in an unblinking stare. “I’ll tell you more, someday. For now let’s keep it simple. I like to be here with you, so I am. If you’re bored, we could do something a little more exciting.”

  She had that naughty twinkle in her eyes, and then she kissed me. Not a friendly peck, but a full-on lips and tongue kiss. I responded, kissing her back, measuring the experience against Anita.

  Her lips were small, and cool, thin. And her tongue flickered lightly. Though it was fun, and I liked feeling her lithe body on mine, it felt wrong. Like I was doing something very wicked. Felt a lot like cheating on Anita.

  Then Nadia took it up a notch. Her hand slid down my belly and into the front of my boxer shorts. It was quite a shock to feel her cool fingers there, an actual physical jolt, as if her touch was electrically charged.

  I reacted immediately, sitting bolt upright, pushing her off. She thumped onto the floor, but was right back up a second later, on top of me, her legs straddling my hips. She shoved me down on my back, a fiery look of challenge in her eyes. “Hey! What’s your problem?” She actually snarled. I thought she was gonna take a bite out of me.

  “That’s too much! We’re not … doing that. I don’t care if you’ve done it before, you’re too young. Shit, I’m probably too young. It’s like messing around with my sister.”

  “You know what? You’re not ready for this. We’ll have this talk later.” She licked her lips, her little tongue flickered suggestively. “But we can still have some fun.” She looked at my boxer shorts and started going down.

  “No! That’s not happening.” I grabbed her shoulders and pulled her up into a hug, keeping her mouth away from where it didn’t belong.

  She wiggled her hips and giggled. “I can assure you I’m not too young.” That same naughty look came back over her features. “Are you into the sister thing? I can call you Big Brother. I’ll let you call me Sister. Its kinky, but it might be fun.”

  As she smiled at me playfully, I knew she was serious.

  “Ahh, no thanks.”

  “What? You don’t like me? Come on bro, I know what I’m doing. Trust your little sister.” She pinched me, tickling my ribs.

  “Just stop.” I was laughing out loud by then.

  “Come on bro, let your sister have a taste. Keep it in the family.”

  “You need counseling. Serious. Maybe some Ritalin? There’s gotta be a pill for your kinda sickness.”

  She snuggled in close, hugging me tight. “There’s no cure for what I have. All I need is you. Promise you’ll stick with me, and I promise to stay out of your pants.”

  “Deal. I’m here for you. And I’m flattered, really, but we shouldn’t. It just seems wrong. Like I’m taking advantage of you.”

  She sighed. “It’s okay, I understand. Now go back to sleep before I’m tempted to do it again.”

  * * * *

  Chapter 10

  Thursday, October 14th

  Something fundamental had changed, a subtle shift in the fabric of my world. Where once my generally shitty life had been a series of disappointments, now there existed a string of shiny possibilities. My father had a real job for the first time in over two years. This new thing with Anita put a smile on my face. Then there was Natasha, whose unusual entrances into my nights made life interesting, and then some. I began thinking of college, even if it was only Big Bend Community College. I had a sense of doors opening all around me. Paths that once seemed improbable or impossible were now available.

  I passed my school days with Anita as usual, plus the addition of sly glances, brushing of hands, and those sublime moments of stolen kisses. The evenings I didn’t work for Kittelson on the farm, I spent with Anita at the skatepark.

  I had today off, and I took full a
dvantage of it on the half-pipe. My typical routine was to hit a 50-50 grind along the top edge of the ramp. As gravity and momentum caught up, I popped the board into the air with a twist and squatted into the drop to skate down the ramp. When I reached the other side, I do it all over again. I repeated the move with variations on the turnaround (grinds, noseslides, tailslides, boardslides), and often ended up on my ass. Anita stood on the sidelines watching and gossiping with Cleo and other skaters. Never failed, every time I caught her eyes she smiled.

  A smile like that can change everything. At least that’s how I felt.

  Around 7:00 p.m., a couple minutes after sunset, Tommy pulled up in his Jeep Wrangler, stereo blasting. All heads turned in unison to track the noise.

  Just the way he liked it.

  He hopped out the driver’s side, quickly popped open the passenger side, and physically hauled Rachelle out of the vehicle. Justin stepped down right behind her. I hadn’t seen Justin at the skate park in weeks, and Tommy didn’t skate, so it was strange to see them.

  Even stranger, they all headed straight for the half-pipe. Tommy drug a very resistant Rachelle, her heels skidding on the concrete and she balked.

  They had obviously reunited since their incident at the Safeway deli.

  Tommy’s pale grey-green eyes blazing with some purpose. He was one of those rare individuals blessed with natural good looks. He had the athlete’s build, broad across the chest and shoulders, toned arms, and the typical wrestler’s fade haircut. He carried himself with the arrogance of wealth and confidence forged in competition. Though kinda short, everyone in school knew of his dynamic wrestling reputation. Tommy was feared and respected by most.

  That is with the exception of me.

  My hate for Tommy was a foregone conclusion. If Tommy had never been born rich or good looking or walked around with all that swagger, it wouldn’t have made one bit of difference. The moment I knew who Rachelle was hangin with, I hated Tommy. It was a wholly irrational and slightly psychotic hatred. We were destined to be enemies in all things.

  I doubt Tommy knew or cared.

  Why would he give a shit about me? I avoided him. I never said a word to the asshole. But Justin knew how I felt. And Justin followed behind as Tommy came directly towards me.

  Friends make the worst kind of enemies. They know too much.

  Rachelle tried her best to stop her boyfriend in his advance. She leaned back and pulled Tommy’s arm. “Stop it! I’m not gonna stand here and watch you be an ass! Take me home, now!”

  And then I knew. The thing I had wished for a week ago had actually happened. Someone saw Rachelle riding with me.

  Tommy turned to her, yanking his arm from her grasp, “You two started this shit, I’m gonna finish it!” He stomped up to the entry to the skate park and looked right at me. “Hey Mikey! Get your bitch ass over here!”

  Nah, I think I’ll skate a little longer. I continued my routine.

  Tommy had a real knack for being an arrogant prick. It was one of his most valuable talents, the ability to get under someone’s skin with his special brand of public ridicule, a key aspect of popularity in any social setting. Probably ran in the family. It was Tommy’s father the real estate agent who resold our family home after the foreclosure.

  I kept on skating, rolling up one side of the ramp, and back down to climb up the other side. The majority of the skatepark was now my audience due to Tommy’s theatrics. I took it in stride. This sudden sense of power put a smirk on my face. I looked over to Anita and winked conspiratorially, loving every minute of it.

  This was my turf. I owned this half-pipe. I knew every inch of this park intimately. Fuck Tommy and his bruised pride.

  Tommy stood his ground for a time, but patience was never his strong point. “Don’t make me come over there and kick your ass!”

  Tag, I was it. Can’t just keep on skating when someone’s calling you out.

  I altered my course with a deft skid of the board and cut a cross angle down the ramp, heading for Tommy. I came off the ramp partway up one side and flew through the air, a good four feet high. I executed a perfect 360 in the air before slapping down with both feet on the board, a slick squatting roll. I stood up to a couple cheers from nearby skaters and kicked hard, gaining speed, still heading straight for Tommy. Even Justin had a look of surprised admiration for the maneuver. Rolling hard, I leaned back into a rear nosegrind and skidded right into where Tommy had been standing.

  He side-stepped pretty fast.

  We stood there face to face. I was taller, lankier, scowling down at him. “What’s your problem?” I kicked up my board and caught it in my left hand.

  A skateboard has many uses.

  Overall, I made a decent entrance, and I watched his face flicker with something, a crack in his confidence. This probably wasn’t what he expected. Tommy had stepped out of his element in the skatepark, surrounded by rebellious, grungy kids with shaggy hair and even shaggier clothing. And none of us were particularly friendly or respectful.

  He continued putting on his show, “I hear you’re so hard up for a date that you tried to get with Rachelle, putting your nasty hands all over her the minute I walk away!”

  I snickered and Rachelle stared me down with her ice-blue eyes full of tension. Was that guilt I saw on her face?

  Aha. She was using this situation to fuck with Tommy. Like he had said to her, you started it.

  Rachelle must have told everyone, and now the pressure was on Tommy to do something about it. She wanted him jealous.

  I shook my head. I had thought she was better than that. “I have a date to homecoming, so you got nothin’ to worry about.” I should know when to say less or nothing at all. But my mouth just does its own thing. “She’s all yours.”

  I had to laugh at the instant malice on Tommy’s face. He hated this. And my laughter wasn’t helping.

  A couple nearby skaters who were pretending not to watch started snickering along with me. I threw a wink to Anita. She stood a few feet away, watching quietly, smirking.

  Tommy moved in closer. “Oh, I’m not worried. Actually I’m hoping you give me an excuse to smash your face. I should do it right now, in front of all your buddies.”

  “I have a girlfriend. I don’t need yours.” I moved to take off on my board, but Justin stepped up. He looked to Tommy expectantly, waiting. The prick was in on this. “What are you here for? Forget how to skate?”

  Justin sneered, “I’m here to watch.” Then the wuss stepped back out of my reach. Anita and I both glared hard at our former friend. Bastard Justin didn’t have the balls to do anything on his own. But he was damn good at slashing tires and playing with perfume. Fucker.

  Tommy started in on me again. “I ever catch you coming anywhere near her, I’ll toss your ass from one side of this park to the other!” He took another step forward, dropping low, hands fisted. Ready to rumble.

  “Maybe you should keep a tighter leash on your girl. Leave her sitting around all lonely and abandoned, who knows what might happen.”

  Tommy moved, but I had already anticipated the effect of my words. My board was up. I lashed out with the jagged, sharp edge, an inch from his neck. I held it there, a blatant threat. “Whoa there badass. You really wanna find out how good I am with this board?”

  He wanted to make a move, bad. He had worked himself up, breathing hard, ready to go. “Bring it on. I got no problem cleaning your blood off my board.”

  Tommy, for the first time in a very long time, took a step back. His eyes reflected the knowledge that I was dead serious. I would love to slam my board into his nose, destroy that pretty face.

  The tables had turned.

  He looked at my board, looked at Justin and Rachelle, and the crowd of skaters assembled to watch. “You’re real tough with your board.” As he spoke, he backed away, Justin backing away right beside him. “I’ll catch you sometime without it. Then we’ll see how it goes down.”

  Still walking backwards, he snatche
d Rachelle by the arm. He retreated to the skatepark entry for his final threat. “Remember what I said Mikey, stay the hell away from Rachelle!”

  Tommy turned and marched off, dragging Rachelle with him. Justin had to jog to catch up or get left behind. Glaring back at me, Tommy’s face was a mask of wrath, the epitome of fury. If you looked up ‘wrath’ in the dictionary, at that moment, the footnote would read: *see Tommy Schroeder’s face seconds after being punked-out in public.

  One of the junior high kids standing up high on the half-pipe raised his board, brandishing it like a medieval shield. He growled, “This. Is. Sparta!”

  Snickers and laughter erupted all over.

  I had gathered a ring of skaters gawking at the confrontation. Anita, Cleo, and Rafe moved in to join me. Tommy peeled out of the parking lot in a blind rage. He missed clipping another car by inches. It was one of those rare, delicious moments of victory.

  I savored this moment.

  Rafe bumped my fist. “That was classic, dude. I wish I had recorded it.”

  “That’s just what I need, another video for Facebook.” I grinned wide.

  He shook his head, smiling.

  Anita took my hand. “I thought you were gonna take his head off. I’ve never seen you so mad. It was kinda sexy.” She kissed me, like a conquering hero. A little awkward in front of her brother, but still awesome.

  Someone tugged on my shirt. I looked over to find Nadia’s amber gaze boring into me.

  “Hey! When did you get here?” I never knew what to expect from her. She always popped up out of nowhere. She’d been visiting nightly, but I’d never seen her at the skatepark before.

  She answered casually, “A few minutes ago.” Nadia peered around to the other side of me. “Who are your friends?”

  “Oh … this is my girlfriend, Anita, and her brother, Rafe.” Anita blushed. I smiled awkwardly, feeling the same heat on my face. I hadn’t gotten used to that word yet, girlfriend. It meant so much more than simply having a girl who was a friend.