CHAPTER XX
DISADVANTAGES OF A CHAISE AND A PAIR OF HORSES
In this rapt condition of mind, and in this remarkable fashion did weproceed along the road. Through villages and hamlets, past churchesand inns, up hill and down we took our gallant way. The sense of rapidmotion made without the least inconvenience to our own jaded limbs,coming after hours of arduous travelling by their painful exercise, wasincomparable, unless it be likened to what the soul must feel whenwafted to Elysium on a cloud, after suffering the slow agonies ofdeath. The exhilaration of our progress was wonderful indeed.Steaming along the highways in an elegant equipage, the late oppressionfell off our spirits and gaiety came out in us once again. We did notknow whither we were going, to be sure; it was sufficient that we werefortified with ways and means once more, and that we had so audaciouslycontrived to leave our pursuers in the lurch.
"I wonder what are the contents of these boxes," says I, indulging adelightful speculation as we sped along.
"I suppose we ought not to touch them, whatever they are," says Cynthianervously.
"In that case," says I, "we must not open them."
"Oh, I think we might safely do that," says Cynthia in a voice of thedeepest disappointment. "Although they are not ours, that is noreason, as far as I can see, why we should not have just one peep atwhat they are. That will be doing harm to no one, will it?"
"I fear it will be otherwise," says I mischievously. "For if we get sofar as the opening of the boxes I am sure we shall not be content witha mere inspection of the contents."
"Oh, Jack," says the indignant Cynthia, "how can you talk so. I amsure you cannot mean to infer that we should be guilty of anything--ofanything we ought not to be guilty of."
"Of appropriating articles that belong to others, for example."
"Yes," says she, "that is what I meant."
"Well," says I, "is there not the melancholy case of our refusing thehighwayman's booty in one form and accepting it in another?"
"That I am sure we did not," says Mistress Virtue. "We did not ask himto pay our bill."
"To be sure we did not," says I, "but he paid it, none the less. Now,had we acted in that matter according to your fine ideas, we should, inthe first place, have delivered that highwayman up to the King'sjustice; then the rape of the squire's guineas would never have beencommitted, and the landlord's bill would not have been paid at all.That is why one is ever so perplexed by these high principles ofconduct. Why draw the line in one place and not in another? Do we notmake these arbitrary distinctions and often deny ourselves all mannerof things thereby, when we can least afford to do without them, and yetthere is not a day that passes but what we commit offences against ourcodes of honour with a cheerful heart. So much depends upon the titleby which an act is dignified. Persons in our degree of life refer tocertain sources of their emolument as privilege and monopoly, whereasif they were enjoyed by those in a humbler sphere, who would hesitateto denounce them as robbery and fraud? Now these boxes being in ourpossession, and as we are quite destitute of means, is not there ahundred ways by which we can prevail upon our consciences to permit usto enjoy their contents?"
Cynthia stoutly denied this specious reasoning at the time. But afterawhile, when the horses began to flag, and hunger, our ancient doggedenemy, began once more to assert himself, she was inclined to look atthe matter in a rather more lenient light.
"We must incontinently perish of starvation by the way," says I,"unless these chests of Mr. Waring and his Grace, your papa, can helpus. Now which course shall we adopt? And we to take the articlestherein as a loan, fully intending to recompense their owners at a morefortunate season? or shall we simply take them without any reservationwhatever, as lawful prizes won from the enemy in open fight?"
"I think I like the idea of the 'borrowing' best," says the scrupulousCynthia.
"Very well, then, we will effect a loan," says I.
We could hardly venture to pull up at the door of any reputable inn inour present state. We were the beggars no longer, but a lady andgentleman of quality. Persons who drive about the country a pair offine horses and a chariot of the first fashion are compelled to supporttheir responsibilities. That is ever the eternal drawback. I, clad inthe meanest of garments, divested of my coat and hat, would have beenentirely at ease in my former mean character, and should have passedunnoticed in it. But once I drove to the inn door in the Duke'schaise, attired in that fashion, I should be the talk of the place.Therefore I brought the horses to a halt, in a secluded part of theroad, and proceeded to investigate the nature of the articles in thechests, in order to see if they could afford an embellishment to ourpresent unfortunate garb. We hoped to discover some money, too, for wehad not so much as a penny between us.
However, no sooner did we try to open these valises, than we received aserious set back. They were both securely locked. Search as we mightamong the cushions of the chaise, we could find, as we anticipated,never a trace of the keys. We were greatly dashed, but still it was anopportunity for the display of our resources. I got out of thevehicle, and after much poking about in a ditch at the side of theroad, discovered a heavy stone. Armed with this, I attempted to knockoff the fastenings from Mr. Waring's box. It was a tedious, wearybusiness, for they were stout indeed, but at last patience, if notvirtue, met with its reward. The lid flew open and disclosed theprecious contents.
Conscious of our ragged, penniless condition, we enjoyed every thrillthat such treasure trove could afford us. To prolong our pleasure werefrained from all reckless rummaging, but drew forth and duly examinedeach article in the order in which it was packed. First came a suit ofclothes, and then silk stockings, shoes, another suit of clothes,handkerchiefs, a razor, brushes, a cocked hat, and all the details thatgo to make up the masculine attire.
But although we delved to the bottom of the box and searched every inchof it, we could not discover so much as a copper piece in money. Thiswas a severe disappointment, and we addressed ourselves fearfully tothe opening of the Duke's box, for should that prove barren of it too,our pass would be indeed a sore one.
It was no easier matter to force this box than it had been the other,but at last our task was accomplished and the thing stood open beforeus. The articles within it bore a striking resemblance to those in theother, only that they were not so elegant and costly. They began witha shirt and a white cotton night-cap, and below we came upon a wig anda dressing-gown, but although our hearts might beat never so wildly itwas in vain that we looked for money. Indeed, the only things that wemight regard as a substitute for it were a few trifling articles ofjewellery, such as a solitaire and a gold pin or two for the Duke'sneckcloth, a pearl button, and a pair of shoes with silver buckles.
"Oh," says I, bitterly, "never again will I be at the trouble ofpicking his Grace's baggage if this be the manner of his travelling.One would have thought that a duke of all people would have goneequipped handsomely. I expected to find guineas galore; or, allowinghis Grace to be a thrifty soul, and that he preferred to carry them inhis boots or next his heart, I had certainly looked for a profusion ofgold diamond ornaments. Why, curse it all, never one of his toiletrequisites hath so much as a pearl or silver handle. Why, even hisnight-cap, which should be studded with precious stones, like the fezof the Shah of Persia, is but a common affair of white cotton. A Dukeis not alive to the responsibilities of his position who goes aboutwith these mean accompaniments."
"Poor papa," says Cynthia, sadly, "I confess that I ought to have knownthat we must go wanting should we rely on him. It was ever his chieffoible to make a halfpenny go as far as two farthings possibly could.Even the solitaire surprises me. I am sure he must be proposing tobreak his journey at the house of the rich widow at Bath, to whom hehath been paying his addresses this twelvemonth, else he would neverhave encumbered himself with such an extravagant finery."
We were, indeed, bitterly disappointed. Here we were, two persons ofquality, with our own horses a
nd chariot, with two boxes of luggage anda case of pistols, and not a grey groat piece to the two of us. Thisfact seemed to acquire a new irony from our otherwise liberalcircumstances. Whatever could we do? Cynthia suggested that we shouldsell one of the horses, as two were not essential. However, I was firmin the opinion that so long as we retained the chaise we must have twohorses to draw it, for the Duke was certain to lose not an instant inpursuing us in the hottest manner. I then proposed that we should partwith the vehicle itself and both the horses, and resume our wanderingnomad life once more.
Cynthia shuddered at this. She had plainly no zest now for our formermode, nor could it be wondered at, poor child, when her trials andexertions came to be considered. Had there only been me in the case Ishould not have hesitated to try to find a purchaser for our equipage,difficult as the matter might have proved. For I was convinced that wewere really in a more unsafe situation now than ever before. It wouldbe impossible to avoid publicity; and at every inn we came to we shouldbe the objects of conjecture, and everything pertaining to us would bediscussed and commented on. Besides, we could no longer sleep where welisted. The horses would require rest and succour whatever thedeprivations of their masters.
After addressing and re-addressing ourselves to the great problem ofhow to obtain the service of innkeepers without paying for the same, wecame to the conclusion that we could best hope to do so by adopting aformer expedient, which was attended with not unhappy results. In lieuof hard cash we must present them with a grievous tale of being stoppedby a highwayman, who had taken our last penny. To do this with thebest effect, however, we must neglect no opportunity of maintaining inour own persons the status of our chaise and horses. My own attire didwell enough for an ostler, but as our friend Mr. Sadler had pointedout, it was likely to detract from the story we had to tell.Therefore, I decided to exchange my raiment for the more appropriateclothes of Mr. Waring. I did not apprehend any difficulty in regard tothe fit, as we were greatly alike in stature.
With this end in view I selected the necessary articles of apparel fromthe box, and left Cynthia to take care of our vehicle, whilst I retiredinto the shelter of a neighbouring hedge and made a completetransformation of my outward semblance. Mrs. Cynthia was hugelydelighted at the result. She had never quite been able to acquiesce inmy late style, and her feelings on the subject were pretty clearlyindicated by her immense satisfaction now.
"Shoes, and silk stockings too," says she with a childlike pleasure."And what a dear laced coat, and what nice white ruffles! I am certainyou make a far more perfect gentleman than you do an ostler, though tobe sure you are greatly lacking a shave."
"It is ever so," says I. "The moment one goes up in the world one'sresponsibilities multiply. When I was an ostler my unrazored chinpassed without comment; but the moment I improve my condition I mustshave every morning, or else be more miserable than ever I was in myformer station."
Mrs. Cynthia was too preoccupied with my appearance to chide me forlong-winded truisms of this sort. I must not omit to state that duringmy absence she had supplied the deficiencies in her own attire bytaking a smart three-cornered hat of Mr. Waring's which, though greatlytoo large for her, she had contrived artfully to adjust on the back ofher head, and thereby gained a sweetly rakish appearance from it; andfurther supplied her lack of a cloak in a no less skilful fashion bydraping one of the rugs about her in a way that simulated such anarticle.
We came to an inn with our pitiful tale. We had it all mostwonderfully pat, having rehearsed it carefully, until we were able topour it forth with an infinity of detail. If the distressed conditionof the horses, and our own evident sincerity were not enough, therewere the boxes all tumbled and ransacked to add weight to the evidence.Our imposition being so well received, and the attitude of the landlordseeming so friendly, we determined to run the risk of being overtaken,and break our journey here for an hour while we made a meal, and thehorses were fed and rested. Whether it was that the landlord was a manof a most tender heart, or that our address was so truly excellent, Icannot say, but certainly the honest fellow did not hesitate to take usat our own valuation. If there was any small particular in which hecould serve the earl and countess he should be more than happy. Thesmall particular in which he was able to do so was by remitting theamount of our charges against a future occasion, and by lending us aguinea or two on no better security than the possession of our pleasantmanners and a chaise and a pair of horses.
We went our way in much better heart. We were fortified indeed by sucha generous confidence. And so susceptible is the mind to the opinionof others, that on the strength of the landlord's disposition, we beganto hold up our heads again in the world, and to take a rose-colouredview of our affairs. All was not lost yet by a good deal. With ouradmirable equipage we had resources of a sort; and we were still in thecomplete possession of our freedom. It remained for us to utilize itto the full.
It was while we were engaged with this train of speculation that aconcrete and definite idea came into my head. Why not make for theport of Bristol and flee the country? Why not indeed?
"A brave plan, truly," Cynthia says, "but we cannot do it withoutmoney."
"We will sell our horses and chariot to some honest vintner of Bristolcity," says I, "and the proceeds should easily suffice to take us tothe Americas."
Although Mrs. Cynthia shook her head and deprecated it as a wild-goosescheme, she was compelled to admit that it was the best that offered.Her protests were not unmingled with regret, for she could not be gotto consider it so light a thing to renounce her country. For my part Imust confess that I was troubled with no such scruples. Like allpersons who serve it scurvily, and who are least of an ornament to it,I held myself to be as ill-used by it as ever it had been by me. Ifelt that I could renounce it for ever without a pang.
After some little meditation I became immeasurably taken with thisscheme. There was no reason why with one bold stroke we should notrenounce our liabilities and put away our dangers. Every hour we spentin England now was at our peril. But let us reach the port of Bristoland turn our chaise and horses into ready money sufficient to defraythe expenses of the voyage, and once again should we be able to breathethe air of freedom. Seeing me more than ever possessed with thenotion, Mrs. Cynthia, like a dutiful wife, began presently to yield toit. She owned at least that a life over seas could not be much moreprecarious than the one we were at present enjoying, and it mightconceivably be less so.
"But I could wish," says she, "that we had more to found our fortuneson. How can we support ourselves when we get to--towhat-d'ye-call-'em?"
"You will spin, my dear," says I, "and I shall delve, in some lone woodcabin on the prairie."
"But we shall perish of the dulness in a twelve-month."
"Oh no, my dear," says I, "there will be wild beasts and Red Indians toprovide us with more than enough of relaxation."
By slow degrees I brought her so entirely to my way of thinking, thatshe became as keen to make the port of Bristol as ever I could be.Indeed, so much were we put in mind of this that we began to makeinquiries of our whereabouts, that we might set our faces thither atthe earliest moment. We lay that night at an honest, comfortable inn,and learned to our surprise that our wanderings had brought us towithin a day's journey of Exeter. We had certainly not supposed thatwe had come so far from town, nor that we had penetrated so far intothe country of the enemy. For, as Cynthia excitedly exclaimed, in thenear neighbourhood of Exeter was her father's seat. This unexpectedcircumstance wrought upon her in a singular way.
"I would dearly love to look on the old place for the last time," shesaid.
Although her father's house had in itself so slight a hold on heraffection that she had renounced its advantages for ever, despite allthe desperate consequences of such an act, its proximity had still thepower to kindle a sentiment in her heart. Besides, as a little latershe pointed out, there was a certain expedience in going thither.There were some small piec
es of her personal property that she had leftbehind in the sudden recklessness of her flight, which could be easilyretrieved and would add materially to our resources. This to my mindwas something like an argument. I had no longer that fine disregardfor ways and means with which I had set out on our pilgrimage. Moneywas a base consideration enough, but it seemed a mighty difficultmatter to do without it. Cynthia's few jewels and trinkets were likelyto serve us too well, even in the Americas, for us to afford todisregard them.
Here then was an end to all my objects. We would diverge a little outof the straight road to Bristol, and pay a visit to Cynthia's home inthe absence of her papa. We counted for our safety on the fact that wemust be some hours ahead of that irate old gentleman. All the same, wewere taking a considerable risk. Much depended on how soon our papahad been able to replace the chaise and horses we had stolen from him.But I do not think we hesitated an instant on this account, having oncecommitted ourselves to this daring course. Besides, there was acertain savour of humour in paying a call on his Grace in thesecircumstances, which did a great deal to reconcile us to theinconvenience.