“Would you change it, Morgan? Would you give all this up and go back to that day if you could?”
“It’s not always about money, Drew. Yes. I would give it up in heartbeat to have Justin in my life, to have never watched him scream for me while he was being ripped out of my arms.”
“I can’t imagine that, Morgan. I’m so sorry.”
I had told Drew I’d forgiven him for the choice of taking Justin from me, but I hadn’t, not until that night anyway. Drew and I talked about my childhood, my mother, the lack of food, heat, and clothing, all of it. For the first time ever, Drew wanted to know these things. He asked many questions, apologized a million times for the life I was forced to be born in, and held me close while I cried for my little brother. I didn’t want to stop thinking about Justin. I loved him and never wanted to lose that.
Drew made slow, obsessive love to me, knowing I needed to be close to him, close to something permanent in my life. I think he needed the same thing, and once again we melted together, both needing to belong.
***
“What are you doing for the next couple days?” Drew asked at breakfast.
“Changing my shirt,” I laughed as Nicholas sputtered orange baby food from his mouth. He was so happy in the mornings.
“After that?”
“I’m going to the doctor with Alicia, probably get some lunch, maybe get our nails done. Why?”
“Curious. Are you taking little man?”
“No, he’s staying with Ms. Marta,” I inform Drew, then face Nicky. “Aren’t you, Nicky?”
“That’s it. I’m changing his name.”
“Maybe when Alicia has her baby I’ll stop,” I lied. I liked calling him Nicky.
“What’s she naming her?”
“She’s got a couple picked out: Daisy—which Celeste hates—and Trinity.”
“I hate them both.”
“Yeah, Celeste isn’t crazy about them either. She wants to call her Gabriella.”
“I like that. That’s much better. I could do business with a Gabriella better than a Daisy. She’ll never be taken seriously.”
“That’s stupid. Maybe she won’t grow up to be in ‘the business,’ maybe she’ll be an artist like Alicia.”
“I doubt that, not if Celeste has anything to do with it. You should hear Vincent’s role play closing techniques with her. He’s a spitting image of her.”
I rolled my eyes. I was like Alicia in that department; you don’t role play closing techniques with an eight-year-old. I’d save that conversation for Alicia. Drew and I would never agree on that. He’d be doing the same thing with Nicholas, I was sure.
“Drew, let’s go,” Celeste announced, pointing her arm towards the door. She was worse than Drew when it came to work.
I stood and kissed his soft lips.
“I love you,” he whispered hot words to my mouth.
“I love you too. I’ll talk to you later. Hurry home to me.”
“I will,” he replied, kissing my forehead and turning his attention to noisy, babbling Nicky. “I love you too, little man. Daddy will see you later on the computer, okay?”
“Drew!”
“I’m coming,” he yelled at Celeste, kissed me one more time and disappeared.
“It’s just you and me again, buddy,” I said, shoving more food into Nicky’s mouth for him to spit it back out. I hated Drew traveling all the time. Why couldn’t we have one or two stores? Why did we need twenty four strung about the country? I think that’s what we were up to anyway, I didn’t pay much attention.
***
“Spend the night. I don’t want to be home alone,” I begged Alicia once we were back from our errands for the day.
“Okay,” she agreed. I knew she would. She hated being home without Celeste too, and Vincent loved our house, well, the pool, I should say.
Marta, Alicia, and I made more food than we’d ever eat. It was mostly Alicia’s fault. She was the one eating for two. You would have thought she was eating for ten. We ate out by the pool and then watched a movie with Vincent. Alicia and I traded kids for the evening while Marta cleaned up. I helped Vincent with his spelling words, and she bathed Nicky.
“He’s down,” Alicia whispered, closing the door behind her. I placed a finger in the air, letting her know I was on the phone when she entered my room.
“She is not sleeping in my bed,” Drew demanded.
“Yes, she is. She always sleeps with me when she stays here.”
“I know and I don’t like it.”
“You never minded before.”
“That’s because you never rubbed your pussy all over her before.”
“Oh, my god, Drew. You’re ridiculous. Alicia, you can sleep in the same bed, but I’m not allowed to rub my pussy on you. Drew’s afraid I’m going to cheat on him with you in my bed.”
“Drew has the whole place guarded like Fort Knox. Tell him if we do, he’ll be able to watch.”
“I’m going to beat your ass when I get home,” he threatened.
I laughed. “Okay, you can do that. Maybe I will have Alicia do that, you know, just to tide me over till you get home.”
“I don’t think you’re cute at all.”
“Yes, you do. I’m just kidding. Where’s Celeste? Is she in her own room?” I asked, knowing that she was not.
“No, we have work to do, but she has her own bed here. That’s different.”
“How’s that different? You’re letting a beautiful woman sleep in the same room as you, and I’m just supposed to be okay with it?”
“Yes, aren’t you?”
I shook my head. “Yes, Drew. I’m okay with it. I’ve been on trips with you two. You’re both ridiculous. I’ll talk to you in the morning. We’re going to watch a movie.”
“Sleep in pants.”
“I love you,” I retorted, hanging up. I couldn’t believe he was suddenly jealous over Alicia. All because of the night I’d drank a little too much and grinded with the pregnant girl.
“We should go to the beach house soon. You’re going to be too pregnant to go soon.”
“I’m already too pregnant. I can’t believe I agreed to do this. How much longer?”
“Not even three months. It’ll be here before you know it.”
“Oh my god, Morgan. I can’t watch this.”
“Why?” I asked, looking up to the sex scene, laughing.
“Were you this way when you were pregnant? Always wanting sex?”
“I wanted it, I didn’t always get it. Drew and I spent a lot of those months apart, remember?”
“Yeah, but I don’t know how you did it, and it seems like it’s worse when she’s gone. Why do I want sex when Celeste leaves town?”
“How do you and Celeste have sex?”
Alicia chuckled. “You do know that your husband is listening to this conversation, don’t you?”
“Yeah, he probably is. I’m curious, tell me.”
“Like any other couple does, minus the penis.”
“You mean you have like toys and stuff?”
“Do you have toys and stuff?”
“Yes, but Drew has a permanent one that is always there.”
“Celeste sort of does too. There is not a human on earth that knows how to use their mouth better than she does.”
“I’d argue that. Drew is amazing with his tongue.”
Alicia’s phone rang first, and then mine. I could hear Celeste yelling before I ever answered mine. Drew did his own yelling, both ordering us to stop talking about our sex lives. I would let it go, but now I was really curious. I’d just wait until we weren’t in my bedroom to carry on this conversation.
***
We spent our next Thursday with Deidra, talking about me once again. I think she was easing Drew into it, knowing I’d cooperate a little more than he would. I was worried about his turn to share. Drew was so attentive, listening to me describe the way I’d been raised, the hard times we fell on, and the lack of things most peo
ple took for granted.
“I don’t think I take things for granted,” Drew interrupted. “I am very thankful for what I have.”
“You do, Drew. I’m talking about things you don’t even think about.”
“Like what?”
“Hot water. Have you ever heated water on a gas stove that you had to light yourself? Heat, have you ever had to pry frozen wood apart to stay warm? Have you ever eaten popcorn for supper because it was the only thing in the house? I can name a hundred things in five minutes that you take for granted,” I assured him, raising my voice. He had no clue. None whatsoever, and his little pity party was pissing me off.
“Now, I’m going to stop you. We’ve established that Drew was to blame for Justin. Honey, Drew’s not to blame for this. Drew had nothing to do with the hardships of your upbringing.”
Well, hell. She was right. I was getting mad at the wrong person. “I’m sorry,” I said, looking to Drew. He was wearing a sad smile and a heavy heart for me. Drew would take it all away if he could. I knew he would.
Chapter 4
Drew refused to visit the beach house, using the excuse that he had too much to do. He could have done it there. He didn’t want to see my mother. He was carrying a lot of animosity towards her after the last few sessions with Deidra. He was forced to listen to things he had no clue about. He didn’t like it, nor did he like the fact that my mother was a barroom slut and left me to take care of her baby.
“Drew, you know how I lived. You’ve been to my mother’s a dozen times. Why now? Why does this bother you now?”
“Because I can’t imagine anyone, letting their children be brought into a situation like that. Why would she even have kids if she wasn’t planning on taking care of them?”
“She takes care of Caroline.”
“Yeah, and that pisses me off too. She tossed you and Justin away and ran off and had another family. Who does that?”
“Drew, you’re the one that told me she deserved a second chance, and she was trying to make it right. Isn’t that what you’re doing? Are you not using your second chance right now? Please come with me,” I begged. I didn’t want to go if he wasn’t coming too.
“Okay, fine.”
Yes!
That was exactly what Drew and Celeste did the whole four days we were there. They may as well have stayed home. All they did was work. Alicia and I spent time on the beach, looking for sea glass with Caroline and Vincent. My mom kept Nicky while we walked the shore in search of treasure. Caroline and Vincent had a little rivalry going on. Vincent now had twenty-four pieces of gems, and Caroline had twenty-nine. Of course it wasn’t really fair, Caroline lived on the beach. Vincent lived in the desert.
“If you don’t pay attention to me soon, I’m going to explode,” I tormented Drew. It was the first time in three days I’d seen him alone, without Celeste stuck to his side.
He smiled and kissed my lips. “One conference call and I am finished for the day,” he promised. I groaned.
“Where’s your sidekick?”
“She left. Alicia was ready to kill her too.”
“One more call,” I warned, holding up one finger.
“Where’s your mom?” I asked Vince who was watching cartoons.
He shrugged his shoulders, “I dunno. I think Mom Celeste is outside on the phone, and I don’t know where Mom Alicia is.”
I headed down the hall towards Alicia’s room. I should have knocked. Why didn’t I knock? Celeste wasn’t outside on the phone. I stood there, opened mouthed, like an idiot. Alicia had her hands firmly around the spindles of the headboard, in two tight fists. Celeste was between her legs, both naked.
“Jesus, Morgan. Get out!” Celeste finally had to yell, pulling me from my frozen state.
“Sorry,” I managed to spit out, shaking my head, turning on my heels and getting the hell out of there.
Thank god Alicia was so outgoing. She made sure things weren’t awkward between us when we all gathered on my mother’s deck for steaks. Celeste, on the other hand, wouldn’t even look at me. I really didn’t think it had anything to do with what I’d seen her doing to Alicia. I think it had more to do with the fact that I caught her like that, exposed and vulnerable. She needed to be portrayed as sophisticated, put together like Drew. It was truly disturbing how much alike the two of them were when it came to success.
Celeste would do anything to ensure Alicia got to stay home with their kids. She was a lot like Drew in that sense too. She worried about Alicia and Vincent just like Drew did, always lecturing her about playing it safe.
Alicia totally understood when I complained about Drew being so protective. Celeste treated her the same way. Like the time I called him to tell him I was going to the strip, shopping. Little Boys Boutique was having a sale, and I wanted to go.
“You don’t need to worry about a sale. You’re a millionaire ten times over. Wait until I get home and I will take you shopping,” he’d challenged. Of course, I waited for him. I’m not sure what he was worried about. He just worried.
“Come on, Nicholas. Daddy will take you home and fix you a bottle,” Drew said, taking Nicky from my mom. He had been distant toward me since we went over there. He was judging my mother over what he’d learned during our sessions with Deidra. He had no right to judge anyone. What she did was no different than what he’d done.
“We’ll be there in a little bit,” I told him, letting him leave.
“Can I come, Drew?” Vincent asked.
“Sure, come on. Us men will go home, find some sports.”
I laughed at that. Drew didn’t watch sports. I’d never seen him watch sports.
“You think that’s funny?” he asked, kissing me goodbye.
“Uh-uh, you should do that. I think it’s baseball season,” I teased.
Celeste, Alicia, and I walked up the beach back to our house about an hour later. I’d known Celeste and Alicia for almost a year now. I never saw them this way. I was fascinated by the way Alicia leaned into her like I would Drew and held her hand walking down the beach. I was intrigued by the relationship they had. They were so in love, and I found myself curious about their lives behind closed doors for the first time.
“I walked in on Celeste going down on Alicia today,” I blurted out. Drew stopped dead in his tracks, looked up to me, speechless, entering our room from the shower.
“Okay, and you needed to tell me this, why?”
“I don’t know. You’re my husband. I’m supposed to tell you everything,” I retorted, pulling the covers back.
“There are some things you don’t have to tell me. That’s one of them. I can’t picture Celeste like that. I’m sure she doesn’t want me picturing her like that. Gross. Where were they?”
“In their room. I thought Celeste was on the phone. Vince told me she was on the phone.”
“Are you jealous? I can do that for you, if that’s what this is about.”
“It’s not. I mean, yes, you can do that, but that’s not why I told you.”
“Okay, why did you tell me then?”
“I don’t know. I’m just curious about them, I guess. You know, about them both being females and being in love and stuff.”
“You’ve always known they were a couple.”
“I’m curious about their sex life though.”
“Oh, man, Morgan. Do we have to discuss this? I can’t work with Celeste and think about that. I’ll have to fire her and I don’t want to do that. She’s really good.”
“Alicia says she’s good in bed. Do you think a girl can be good in bed, I mean with like another girl?”
Drew threw his head back, covered his face with his hands and groaned, frustrated that I was having this conversation.
“Where’s your laptop?” I asked.
“Why?”
“I want to watch a video.”
“You want to watch porn?”
“Yes.”
“But not just normal porn, right?”
“No.
”
“You want to watch girls?”
“Yes.”
“Why?”
“I already told you. I’m curious.”
“We’ve seen porn with girls before.”
“Yeah, but I wasn’t curious then. I didn’t think about it like I do now, like them being in love. They were just acting, doing it for show. Go get your laptop. I want to watch it.”
Drew shook his head, but walked out to get his computer.
We watched for a little bit. Well, I watched, Drew was more in tune to my reaction to the two beautiful girls on his screen.
“You do know it’s still cheating if it’s the same sex, don’t you,” Drew asked. I turned back to look at him.
“You afraid I’m going to wake up gay tomorrow?” I teased, amused at him.
“Well, you’re curious. Isn’t that how, why everyone has sex? Does that turn you on?” he asked, nodding back to the screen.
I turned back to the sixty-nine positioned women, noticing the throb between my legs. “What do you think?” I asked, moving Drew’s hand between my legs.
“Your panties are wet,” he rasped, rubbing through the silk barrier. I closed his laptop, and he set it aside. “Take them off.”
Sliding out of my panties and lifting my shirt over my head, I slid to a laying position. Drew ran his fingers up my slippery folds, and I moaned.
“Fuck, baby,” he said, becoming aroused at how wet I was.
“Lick it, Drew.”
“You know my dick grows in point three seconds when you say that, don’t you?”
“Hmm. Mmm,” I moaned, feeling two fingers slide deep inside my pussy.
Drew violated my throbbing, over aroused pussy, causing me to moan, writhe my hips into him, and spread myself, wanting him to see me, touch me, and taste me. We were both so into what we were doing and what we were going to do when Nicholas decided that he needed me more than Drew needed me.
“Shit.” Drew stopped all movement. I groaned, moved his hand away from my pissed off pussy and got up.
Sliding my robe on, I left Drew, face down, beating the mattress over his head with unsatisfied punches.