I moved my head from side to side as I remembered my father telling me to listen and that I’d always know what to do.
I glanced at her. “I had a dream that showed me lives with Drake, passion and war...I don’t know if it was real or just my mind justifying why he’s here, but I can’t think about things like that...it’s dangerous...it’s building doubt inside of Landen, rage.”
I felt her arm come around me and a numbing peace encase me. “Landen has no doubt,” she whispered.
I didn’t fail to notice that she didn’t reassure me about his building rage. I stared at her, waiting for her to calm me with her wisdom.
“You know that you’re going to save those people, your friend, mend broken fences – but you don’t know how you’re going to resolve the emotions between you and Drake. Your mind is allowing you to constantly work on that issue; if it didn’t, you’d lose touch with who you are. Very natural...Landen’s reaction...is natural.”
I glanced across the way to where Landen was. Marc, Preston, and Brady were at the passage; they were leaving. Landen was giving instruction to Marc, and the confusion that Marc felt led me to believe that he didn’t think what he was told to do by Landen was wise. Marc looked to where Aora and I were sitting, then to Landen; he then nodded, picked up Preston, and walked toward the passage to leave. I watched as Landen let out a deep breath, but he didn’t look at me. I could feel the distance between us growing, and my soul ached.
“We’re growing apart,” I said in a tearful whisper. “I can feel it. We haven’t had a chance to really get to know each other outside of dreams, and because of that he doesn’t understand the bonds I have with people that were in my life when he was just a dream.”
“This turmoil is because of your friend, the one called Dane in this life?” she asked.
“Did you know him in another life?” I asked.
She let her eyes tell me no. “You’ve spoken of him, though.”
“I must have told you he was a great person – because he is,” I said, searching her eyes for agreement.
She didn’t answer me; instead, she looked to the opening of the passage. Libby was hugging Landen goodbye, and my dad and Ashten were stepping through to leave. Once Libby had left his embrace, Pelhan began to lead Landen closer to us.
“It is time for you to go,” she said, rising.
I felt my mother and looked down the road to see her and Clarissa waiting for a moment to say goodbye to me.
“Wish me luck,” I said, standing.
She stood and reached to hug me.
I walked slowly to my mom and Clarissa; my mother walked faster. When she reached me, she didn’t say a word; she just put her arms around me and held me there for a moment, then extended her arms. “I just wanted to tell you goodbye. I was excited when they said you were here, but then I heard about what happened...I’m sorry.”
“I’m gonna get her back – all of them,” I promised.
I watched her hold back tears. “I know you will.” She hugged me once more, then walked past me before she began to cry.
Clarissa looked so much calmer, almost happy, on the outside - but I could still feel her broken heart. “Do want to come back with me? He’s really hurt.”
She shook her head no. Before I could argue, I felt Libby’s tiny arms around my waist.
“Hey there,” I said in the most cheerful voice I could manage.
“I just wanted to hug you. Mom needs me now,” she said, smiling and looking up at me.
“You keep her safe for me; make her strong like you make me strong,” I urged, leaning down to hug her.
“I will,” she whispered in my ear before she let go of me and ran in the direction of my mom. My mother was telling Landen goodbye, and she looked over her shoulder at me as she took Libby’s hand. I felt her concern and dread rise inside of her; I knew that she agreed with whatever Landen said to her but knew that I wouldn’t. I grew desperate to get Clarissa to come with me; I knew I couldn’t defend Dane on my own much longer.
I turned back to her. “Please,” I said quietly.
“I can’t, Willow. I’m sorry...I just can’t.”
“It’s bad, Clarissa. He’s in a dark place, and I can’t pull him out on my own.”
She stepped forward and hugged me. “I’m sorry, but he has to take the first step. You can’t save him from whatever he’s caught up in unless he wants you to.”
I stepped back and tried to hide the anger I felt. “If this was Landen – or even Drake – I’d be relentless...I’d use everything I had to save them.”
“I know, but I’m not you. All I can say is right now, every part of me is telling me to stay away. It’s almost like he’s telling me; the Dane I fell in love with is telling me to stay right here, that I’m safe. I love that man, and I’m going to do as he asked and hope that in time I’ll find him again.”
“I’m gonna fix this,” I promised her.
“Bring Olivia home, then we’ll work this out. Right now, she comes first – promise me that.”
“Promise.”
She hugged me once more, then went to meet my mom and Libby. I reached out my emotion to find everyone else; I wanted to tell them goodbye, but I felt that they were scattered, and Landen was eager to leave. As I walked to his side, his quiet conversation with Pelhan halted.
Pelhan looked over me carefully. “No worries, child; I will say your goodbyes,” he promised.
“Thank you. I don’t want them to think I don’t have time or care enough to say so,” I said, looking into his wise eyes.
“They know you love them, child, and that now your purpose is calling you,” he said quietly.
I nodded once and walked past him, wanting to get back, to find a way just to end this now; I wasn’t going to wait for a ceremony. Landen reached for my arm as I passed him and let his hand slide into mine as we made our way to leave.
Landen squeezed my hand when we reached the passage. “We need to stop when we step in here; I want to talk to you about something.”
I held my breath, almost sure that I didn’t want to hear what he had to say. I stepped into the passage; ignoring his request, I started to walk to Esterious.
“Willow,” he said aloud.
I halted, feeling his solid intent not to move another foot until we talked. I slowly turned to him, our eyes locked; he stepped forward, closing the gap between us, then raised his hand to gently cradle my face. His perfect blue eyes danced over my solemn expression, searching for a way to say what he knew would infuriate me.
“For the first time,” he whispered, “I can see you starting to -”
“You think I’m falling apart,” I said in a shaky voice, feeling the tears pool in the corners of my eyes.
“No,” he said, leaning in to kiss my lips. He slowly pulled away but let his forehead rest against mine, then raised his hands to my face, catching my wandering tears.
“I need you to stay away from Dane,” he whispered.
I hesitated before I stepped out of his embrace. I knew his intent all along, but to hear it now made it impossible to ignore.
“No,” I said, looking blankly up at him, prepared to argue my point. From the corner of my eye, I saw a shadow coming forth in the string. The lack of emotion I felt told me it was Drake, and I knew he wasn’t coming to see Livingston; they were about to team up against me. Landen had told Marc to send Drake here, and the fact that Landen would ask Drake to help him argue his point could only mean that his mind was made up - and that he wasn’t going to change it.
“I’m not falling apart – you are. You’re turning on our family,” I said coldly, “and why? I’ll tell you why,” I said, catching Drake’s mesmerizing eyes as they emerged from the glow in the string. “Because he told you to. Is that what he meant before when he told you that he had no problem killing someone who would hurt me?!”
Landen’s eyes blazed with anger as he gripped my arms. “I don’t want to kill him, Willow. I don’t want to
look at the grief in your eyes. Stay away from him; don’t put me in that position.”
“He’s giving you a choice that I’d never give you,” Drake said firmly.
I pushed away from Landen and glared at the two of them.
“Both of you need to remember that for eighteen years, you were only in my dreams. Dane was at my side; he was the one who faced every image with me, not caring that we may never come back from where my touch would take us.”
I looked at Drake. “He was the one who held me when I didn’t understand the dreams we shared. He let me show him - and only him - my fear.”
I looked at Landen. “And he was the one that held me when the distance between you and me was too far.” You could hear the tears in my voice. “You knew the string existed, that soul mates found each other every day, but I didn’t. I had to fight my doubt, go to school and portray the life of a normal girl. He allowed me to be myself. As days went by, my heart broke, and my mind told me that you couldn’t be real – but when there was the possibility that you were, he was the one that put me on the plane to find you, the one who told me that I couldn’t be afraid of what this life held for me.”
Landen stepped forward, put his hands on my shoulders, and tried to capture me with his breathtaking stare, but I refused to look at him; instead, I stared at the blinding glow of the string. “I know the Dane you’re talking about. I respect him, love him, and owe him everything for watching over you – but that Dane is gone.”
I pushed Landen’s arms off my shoulders. “He’s not gone; he’s sitting in Esterious right now.”
I felt Drake grip my arm, and his addictive touch seemed to hum more fiercely than ever before; I imagined his anger was fueling it. He swung me into his arms and raised my chin, forcing me to look in his dark eyes. “He’s the reason she’s there...why can’t you see that?”
“Get your hands off her!” Landen yelled, putting himself between me and Drake.
“You’re the one that told me to come,” Drake bellowed, pulling his shoulders back.
“I told you to come so we could tell her what we both know - not so you could put your hands on her. It’s bad enough you won’t stay out of her dreams!”
“What’s wrong, Landen? Is she finally starting to remember? Do you now have competition?!” Drake said through gritted teeth.
“Stop it!” I screamed, breaking their glaring stares with each other. “I don’t care what you both think you know! Have either of you two ever heard of being in the wrong place at the wrong time? What if it was Libby or Preston that Olivia went to talk to – would you doubt them? No, you wouldn’t. Both of you are just looking for a reason to hate him – based on what, a past that none of us can remember?”
“I can remember clearly,” Drake said, tilting his head, showing an unbelievable amount of confidence.
I felt like there was no way to win between the two of them, and the anger was beginning to suffocate me. “You don’t remember; you’re relying on dreams, dreams that you told me shifted forward and backwards.”
“Trust me, love, my memories of what he’s capable of are more terrifying than anything you’ve ever seen,” Drake assured, raising his eyebrows.
“I don’t believe you,” I said, returning his piercing stare.
He's telling the truth, Willow, Landen thought.
I looked at Landen; I knew he was telling me the truth, but I couldn’t believe that the one in Drake’s memories was Dane.
“Tell me that you have no resentment toward Dane for what he and Clarissa are going through right now.”
Landen’s jaw locked, and I felt the anger he had for Dane rise inside of him. “I’m human, Willow. She’s my sister, and he hurt her, but that has nothing to do with what we’re talking about right now.”
“It has everything to do with it! You don’t trust him anymore, which is why it’s so easy for you to believe he could be bad. I’m not gonna let you push him out of my life; we have bigger issues.”
“We don’t need him to save her. If there was anyone we needed – and I doubt we do need them - it would be the twin the scroll mentioned,” Landen said in a tone of forced calm.
“That’s my point: instead of looking for her, the two of you are too busy banishing people from my life!”
“Her?” Drake said, sighing under his breath.
“Yes, her - the one that’ll end this jacked up love triangle we’ve managed to create!”
As Drake’s jaw tightened, he tensed, and I could see frustration in every part of his body. He stepped forward and stared intently down at me. “I don’t care if you manage to find someone who looks just like you. You act like I’m in love with your body...if that were true, would I have not found love in Olivia that night at the lake when we first met? Or when I pulled her from the angry sea that seemed determined to end her life? I love your soul, Willow.”
Landen put his hand on Drake’s chest, pushing him away from me.
“You aren’t going anywhere near Dane!” Drake yelled, ignoring Landen.
Landen looked at me. “Willow, this is my last warning: if he makes one false move, I will kill him. If you don’t want that, stay away from him.” His tone was firm and final, which infuriated me.
I glared at them. “There’s no way to win with the two of you, and I’m done arguing. I’m going to Dane’s side. When the two of you overcome this uncalled-for hatred, you’ll know where to find me.”
I looked deep in Landen’s eyes, wanting him to stop me from walking away. I felt his intent grow stronger; he was more determined than ever to find a way to banish Dane from my life. Disbelief consumed me as I turned and walked away.
He didn’t follow me – and that act tore my soul in two. I walked faster, fighting angry tears, determined to suppress any emotion that would show how weak I felt at that point, fighting to prove him wrong. I wasn’t falling apart – he was. I was the only one thinking straight right now.
My brisk walk turned into a jog. I was so mad at the two of them; I couldn’t understand how Landen could turn so quickly on Dane or how Drake could be so cold. I could feel how angry Landen was with me, but I didn’t care; I was going to Dane. I was almost sure the devil himself had brainwashed Dane, and I wasn’t going to let the devil win; I was going to break through whatever mind warp Dane was in – and bring our family back together again.
I told myself that when they saw how determined I was to protect Dane, they’d find a way to see his innocence, and whatever issues Dane and Clarissa had would work out; all couples have rough patches they must face.
The string began to hum, then a vibration of energy coursed through my body. As I came to a halt, I tried to focus on Landen, to find his emotion, but I was too far away. Panic was starting to consume me. I looked forward, then behind me. I couldn’t see the yellow passages of Pelhan’s world behind me, or Landen and Drake, and I wasn’t sure how far away I was from Esterious.
As the vibration intensified, I stepped cautiously forward, daring to brave what could only be a storm. I inched closer to the wall, prepared to step through if the energy threatened to sweep me away. The thought of the pain that would course through me if the string separated me and Landen made me cringe. I told myself that the wave of energy had reached where we were standing and that Landen was on his way to protect me. I wanted to stand still, but I knew that would only cause me to lose my bearings. Slowly moving forward was my only option.
From out of nowhere, a bolt of energy rushed past me, knocking me to the ground. I heard a growl vibrate against the glowing white walls of the string, and I knew I wasn’t alone anymore. I hid behind the expression of anger, but I was terrified. I tried to stand, but a vacant force thrust me back down. I shielded my energy around me and watched as blow after blow vibrated my diminishing shield. As I grew weaker with each blast, I knew in a matter of seconds that I would have no defense against the force that was haunting me. I took a deep breath and slid my body through the wall of the string. Once the ting
le of energy passed by, the excruciating pain began; my muscles felt as if they were being pulled apart one by one.
I looked up to find myself in the middle of a desert. The sun was beating down, and it felt like it was a thousand degrees – so hot, I couldn’t breathe. My heart raced as my body tried to cope with the panic and pain it was experiencing all at once. My eyes raced across the open space, looking for an opening to the string - but the heat from the sun caused all of the air to move, making it impossible to know what part was my passage.
I closed my eyes and tried to think of a way out of the mess I’d gotten myself into. A cool breeze began to crawl against my skin, drying the sweat that was pouring from me. I opened my eyes, hoping that it had somehow cooled the air enough for me to see my way out. When I focused, all I could see were the beautiful white butterflies. Relief swept through me; I knew they were there to give me a second chance. As I rose up on my knees, I could only hope they’d lead me back to the moment I’d walked away from Landen. I let the guilt of letting my temper control me consume me; I hated how stubborn I was, and now I was paying the price for that weakness.
The butterflies gathered themselves before me. I crawled forward, feeling agonizing pain with each move I made. They were inches away, but I couldn’t move any further. They seemed to know and glided closer to me. As they fluttered over my body, I felt the heat of the desert leave. I closed my eyes and fell to the ground, expecting to find myself at Landen’s feet. The pain didn’t leave; it intensified. The sand I was lying on turned into smooth stone. I tried to focus on the room I was in, but the pain wouldn’t allow my mind to use my insights.
I felt someone’s hands on my shoulder and turned defensively to see who it was. A young boy with eyes as clear as water was standing over me. His expression held utter confusion. He brushed his wavy blond hair out of his innocent face and knelt down to me.
“Aella, what’s wrong? Why are you lying on the floor?” he asked, dismayed.
Flashes of the time I was trapped inside Evelyn came to me. I couldn’t have made the same mistake again. I knew I hadn’t stepped inside of anyone. The pain caused me to scream, and I pulled myself into a ball on the floor.