The kids who had just received Company Roster (Version 1.14) were now giving Al strange looks. The kids were all asking lots of questions among themselves: just how rebellious to authority was this slave, Al Mancini? And, would they soon move from a "hold" to a "sell" position with him? And, as there was absolutely nothing wrong with his face and complexion, the poor grade given him - merely a "good complexion" - when he deserved a rating of either "excellent" or at the least "very good", seemed an ominous portent. Even the little kids could see that that low rating was due simply to the ill-will generated by his argumentative and rebellious personality.
Martha looked at Al, still loaded with all his heavy chains. He face was crest-fallen from the chastening of the remarks he had received on his first fitness report. He cuddled close to the beautiful Mirabrasantes and the lovely Misevasundia, yet he still looked crest-fallen.
`Don't feel bad, Al' said Heliomirabellisima. `That report card is not your last.'
`Heliomirabellisima, like me, is one of the Atheists in the company,' said Misevasundia, addressing Al while caressing his shoulders.
Al would have said that an Atheist is just a type of surrender monkey, a cut and runner of a different kind. But he didn't want to offend Misevasundia and Heliomirabellisima. He really liked how Misevasundia was caressing his shoulders.
`I’m no Atheist,’ said Al, `but some Atheists are good at caressing, and kissing.’
`Don't you think the dominate attribute, the key characteristic, shared by all Atheists, is their foul ingratitude?' asked Sevaladelia.
`Oh nonsense! It's their Stupidity! It's their abject, wretched, all-consuming, mind-blowing Stupidity,' insisted Casilevatates.
`Wrong again. The Atheists are puffed up with pride. They are very intelligent but they are bursting with hubris,' insisted Mirabrasantes. `It is elementary, my dear Watson - the Atheists are rank – rank I tell you! - with arrogance.'
`Arg, may the curse of Cromwell be upon the lot of ye,' said Misevasundia, giving her impression of some old Irishwoman.
`We Atheists,' said Heliomirabellisima, `are like people who insist on elegant dining but we are surrounded by "believers" who love to stuff their mouths with Coco-Puffs. The Coco-Puff-Lovers simply can not understand our superior taste in philosophical food.'
`Indeed it is so. Believers are little children. They are emotionally childish, spiritually childish and intellectually childish,' said Misevasundia. `When things don't go their way in life, they, like little children, whine about how God is holding them back, or they bemoan the stupidity of other people when they ought to bemoan their own stupidity.' Misevasundia said all this while she cuddled close to Al Mancini, who was some sort of believer.
`Like those who stuff their mouths with Twinkies and wonder why they are fat,' said Heliomirabellisima, `believers stuff their heads with religious nonsense and then they wonder why they are unhappy with their lives. If you try to help believers and teach them to appreciate honest philosophical food, they vomit out the sensible philosophy and then demand their Twinkies and Coco-Puffs, they demand the religious junk food which they shove into their heads.
`Then shall ye suck,' said Sevaladelia.
`What?' exclaimed several people in unison.
`Then shall ye suck - you know - Isaiah 66. 12, King James version - The glorification of the Gentiles and the time of the sucklings draweth nigh. Then shall ye suck the True Religion, which is Jerusalem, and ye shall no longer suckle the breasts of damnation.'
`Suckle the breasts of damnation!' exclaimed Misevasundia.
`This lady street preacher was telling me about Isaiah 66,' said Sevaladelia. `The Damned suckle bad spiritual food. Christ said ye shall not enter the Kingdom of Heaven unless ye become like little children, so, the Elect are the suckling babes who suckle the good spiritual nourishment from Jerusalem. Then shall ye suck.'
`Oh, please! Take it away! Make her stop!' exclaimed Heliomirabellisima.
`Foul ingratitude,' said Sevaladelia.
`Stupidity,' said Casilevatates.
`Hubris,' said Mirabrasantes.
`You 3 are right and yet you're also wrong,' said Navorrasicaa. `God has hardened the hearts of the Atheists. Their ingratitude, their stupidity, and their arrogance is beyond the span of the human realm: they are errors of supernatural proportions.'
`Yours is a facile theory,' said Seraphinaria. I can see no reason, aside from your own egotism, your own pride, and your own insufferable hubris, to explain your blind reckless dogmatism in insisting God has taken a hand in hardening the hearts of the Atheists.'
`And I'll take issue with your insufferable egotism,' replied Navorrasicaa to her commanding officer - `because in my opinion your own facile dogmatism is shrill, arrogant and mean-spirited.'
`You believers are such babies,' said Misevasundia.
`Then shall ye suck,' said Sevaladelia.
`All right, it's all settled then,' said Seraphinaria. `We agree to disagree on the issue of whether the Atheists are more damnable because of their foul ingratitude, or because of their abject stupidity, or because of their rank arrogance. Furthermore, though God did indeed harden Pharaoh's heart when Moses and the Hebrews were preparing their exodus from Egypt, we agree to disagree on the issue of whether God has in modern times taken active steps to further harden the stony hearts of the Atheists. Now get some sleep. We have a long day tomorrow.'