Come.
Come quick.
iii
Tuesday, January 22, 1991.
Windhoek, Namibia.
The Republican
• A peace proposal by Russia's president Mikhail Gorbachev to the Persian Gulf area yesterday was rejected by Pres. Saddam Hussein of Iraq. America must first pay for his aggression, he said.
• Great dissatisfaction existed on several levels yesterday when it became known that about seven thousand karakul pelts in 37 bales, worth about R220 000, were lost in Frankfurt shortly before the December auction of three containers.
Cape Town, South Africa.
The Burger page 12:
Departure of soldiers not without difficulty.
Cape Times
Respect for the law
THE controversy between President Mugabe and the Chief Justice of Zimbabwe is of Cardinal importance. At issue is the recent provision that excludes the courts from hearing appeals in cases in Zimbabwe of compulsory land acquisition.
Observatory, Cape Town.
At home.
I had a surprise for her.
I was nervous.
Very, very nervous.
I could barely sleep.
I was awake before the Tarzan sounds came from the mosque.
And lately, the sounds were quite early.
Almost around four.
I didn’t get up from my bed. Aunty Anne was working diligently at snoring. Even with the terrible noise of that, she would hear me if I were to tread on the wooden floor.
Fortunately, the curtain was open.
There were no clouds in the sky.
No moon.
Just the many dots against the black.
I wondered if Simoné was awake too.
Would she like her surprise?
I made it especially for her.
With my own hands.
Took me weeks.
A lot of cuts and blisters.
But for my Simoné, it was all worth it.
My beautiful, Simoné.
Still on my bed, I went to the window sill.
Perhaps I could get a glimpse of Anubis.
Couldn’t really see much, because you had to lean off the bed.
But he was already watching me from the darkness.
He sat next to the wall.
On guard.
Eyes on me.
He was beautiful.
The blue sheen of his pelt more prominent in this light.
"Hello, Boy," I whispered.
He stuck his tongue out.
"Are you watching for bullies and gangsters, Boy?”
He pulled his tongue back and sat back up, so to say "Yes, Sir."
"Faithful, friend. Later, I’ll steal some of Mommy’s meat and give it to you. You should just not tell her. Do you hear, Boy?"
Again he stuck his tongue out.
iv
Tuesday, 22 January 1991, at 14:55.
Near the house.
I was nervous.
Very nervous.
I started thinking of chickening out.
But I could not disappoint her.
No.
I'd rather make a fool of myself before I ever disappoint her.
My Simoné must always keep smiling.
With delicate ankles and all.
I was so lost in thought that I did not see him approaching.
Just my luck.
Georgie.
He was alone.
I first thought to run, but decided against it.
As big as Georgie was, he was fast.
I was fast.
It would not help.
He would just use my momentum against me.
Made the mistake several times before.
The time I almost broke my nose, was one of them.
When he was expelled.
He was apparently sent to a juvenile improvement school or something like that.
But I was not sure about this.
As I heard, Georgie was a regular visitor to the local drug dealer.
Mr D.
Who Mr D was, I did not know.
Georgie’s fists were clenched.
He also rolled his hips funny and he seemed to be stepping on one foot more.
His mouth was closed.
No sign of the two upper teeth.
He was furious.
I wrapped Simoné's surprise in newspaper.
First thought of brown paper, but those look too much like school stuff.
I did not want to be reminded of school, so why should she.
I did not know what to do with the packet.
So I just kept it in my left hand, by my side.
Georgie walked faster as he approached.
So, two or what feet away from me, he stood still.
I could clearly see the veins beating in his forearms.
His fists were white.
His eyes wide and black.
I never noticed the blue circles around his eyes.
Purple-grey.
"Salaam, Whitey."
I could see he meant no good with that “Salaam”.
The loud, unruly "Salaam".
Followed by "Whitey."
Almost as if it was something disgusting.
And more disgusting to say.
It looked like it sickened him to say it.
He spat.
To his side.
He started pacing left to right and back again.
His eyes never left mine.
Sporadically, I swear I saw the two upper teeth slightly.
It made him seem creepier.
Today the sh!t is going to hit the fan.
"I missed you, old pal."
His eyes sparkled for a moment.
He smiled slightly.
Like someone who was happy to see an old acquaintance.
"Every day I thought of you."
Why me?
"Every day. On that... God forsaken place.”
“Stikland."
The word came out rough and louder.
He stopped pacing and walked forward.
His chest almost against mine.
He showed me those two top teeth.
Gums and all.
His eyes were black.
Wow.
I almost went in my pants.
But I stood my ground.
I wondered if he could see me shaking.
Simoné's surprise shook in my hand.
You could hear the newspaper.
"What’s this!?"
He grabbed Simoné's packet from my hand and walked away.
Shaking the packet to his ear.
His eyes never leave mine.
He gave the packet one last shake and threw it to the ground.
Stepped on it.
Rammed it properly flat.
All my hard work.
Just like that.
Destroyed.
He still smiled and watched me intently.
I felt like that day.
The day he humiliated me in front of the entire school
I saw myself lying there in the mud again.
Screaming like a girl.
With my hands clutching my jewels.
The anger boiled from deep within me.
I stepped firmer into the ground.
I clenched my fists.
Just held them to my sides.
Tears started burning my eyes.
Tears of sadness.
Tears of absolute anger.
I watched him.
Today is the day.
Told you.
Mark my words, Coloured.
Then everything went red.
v
2010
Doof doof
Like a sledgehammer hitting concrete to pieces.
"Please."
Doof doof.
Doof doof.
"Please."
Doof doof.
r />
Doof doof.
My voice was hoarse.
It felt like hours.
It was.
Hours.
I was weak.
Wouldn’t be able to stand much longer.
The words literally hurt my vocal cords.
Like cotton wool in my mouth.
Dry.
My tongue just prickles.
"Please."
I could not hear myself.
Doof doof.
"Please."
Only doof doof.
Doof doof.
"Please."
Doof doof.
Doof doof.
"Please."
Doof doof.
Doof doof.
I can’t any more.
"Please.
Hooooooooooooooo..."
Wimper.
"Hoooo… hoooooo...
Awwwwwwwwwwe."
Sob.
*Sob sob*
"Hoooooooooooooooo..."
Oh, Lord.
Doof doof.
"Hooooooooo…
Hooooooo... hooooooooooo...”
Awe!
It hurts...
"Hooooooooooo..."
Doof doof.
Doof doof doof
Doof doof doof loudly in your ear.
Doof doof doof.
Please.
Please.
Doof doof.
Doof doof.
Please.
Doof doof.
Doof doof.
Doof doof doof.
Doof doof doof.
Doof doof.
Doof doof.
Doof doof.
Doof doof.
Doof doof doof doof.
Doof doof doof doof.
Doof doof.
"Please.
I’m pleading with you."
Oh, Lord.
It hurts.
Hurts.
"Hooooooooo... awe... it hurts.
Awwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwe.
Awe-wa.
Hooooooooooooooooo…"
I could no longer see through the tears.
"Please."
Only doof doof doof doof loudly in your ear.
Only doof doof doof doof.
Doof doof doof doof
***
2010
Observatory, Cape Town.
The tiny cabin.
Saturday, September 27, 2008.
"Come.
Come in.
It’s a bit small, but it's nice and cosy, just the way you like it.
Hey."
(Silence)
"Look.
Against the wall.
The picture of you at the beach.
Swakopmund, Namibia.
Tiger Reef.
We drank Shreks."
Umf.
"I remember it like yesterday.
Can still feel your hand caressing mine.
Do you remember?"
(Silence)
"The two black dogs gave you such a fright.
You really got me laughing.
Your expression was priceless.
Like you narrowly escaped death."
Ha-ha!
Ha-ha-ha!
Umf.
Uhm.
"Sit down, please.
The couch I made especially for you.
I know you're always struggling to get one that gives your back just the support it needs.
Only first class for you.
How does it feel?"
(Silence)
“I'm glad.
Music?
What about…”
She writes
NB! This is the most uplifting CD on earth.
“Yes."
Think we could do with a little upliftment.
Things are...
No.
(Grace Kelly - Mika starts playing on CD player. Medium volume.)
♪ ♫
I wanna talk to you.
The last time we talked, Mr Smith, you reduced me to tears.
I promise you, it won’t happen again...
♫ ♪
"You hungry.
We have time to eat.
Dial-a-meal.
Your favourite.
What are you in the mood for?"
Umf.
I already know what comes next.
She’s going to order the sweet-and-sour pork.
Ginger beef.
Noodles in oyster sauce.
Spring rolls.
I always ordered two fortune cookies.
"I feel like a little bit of everything. The Chinese especially. Their sweet-and-sour pork is divine."
D-I-V-I-N-E.
Her eyes are shining.
The black now more prominent.
The long lashes around it, like two black flowers against her porcelain skin.
The mascara makes it more alluring.
There she is.
Just like that.
The girl of my heart.
Excited.
"I know I shouldn’t eat so much, but... uhm uhm uhm uhm uhm!"
With the last "uhm" she smacks her lips together.
"My mouth is watering!"
"Why not order?”
"Oh, I wish I could."
Her eyes immediately disappointed.
Her voice softer, almost a whisper.
The tone as if she is actually asking a question.
"It’ll be on me.”
Excited, naughty child in her eyes.
She rubs her hands together and pulls it to her chest.
Her whole body is excited.
"Really, Sher?"
Not actually a question.
Actually more of a thank you.
Even in the dream she could not say the word.
What happens next, I know all too well.
The dream is all I have dreamt for the past year.
Same thing over and over.
Night and day.
Does not matter.
It... and.
Yes.
You say nothing else.
Just the same things over and over.
Drives me mad.
It’s like we’re trapped here.
Never moving forward.
That last good night together.
Just you and me.
Inside the tiny cabin.
♪ ♫
I could be hurtful
I could be purple
I could be anything you like
Gotta be green Gotta be mean
Gotta be everything more
Why don’t you like me?
Why don’t you like me?
♫ ♪
"Take a look at your couch.
It’s not just any couch.
Told you, only first class for you..."
"Yes. Hahaha!"
Ha-ha-ha.
"Big enough to put two or three coasters next to each other.
Your water with ice.
Your water without ice. For your pills.
And your home brew iced tea."
"You can of course do as you wish. It's yours. "
"Whisky and Coke Zero. Just as your heart desires."
The coasters pop in and out, just as you wish.
You can put them all away.
Yes.
Just like that."
Anything for you.
My sweetpea.
"They can adjust as well.
You know your drink glasses change to suit your moods."
Yes. Look at me with that innocent face.
You know I love that angel face.
Or do you?
Will never know now.
It's.
Yes.
"Take your arm off the arm lean for a sec and push that little button."
Yes.
Yes, push.
"There you go."
Wish I had a camera.
The look on your face is priceless.
&
nbsp; "Mom did the embroidery. I designed the pattern myself. Had to study up on the software, but for you, the challenge was all worthwhile.
Can you guess what it is?
Yes."
Uhm.
Ha-ha.
“A baby gecko that’s eyeing a chameleon.
Or they are eyeing each other.
The chameleon looks like a leaf and the baby gecko itself looks like a dry leaf.
They both know something is there, but they’re not sure.
Meet cute.
Let your disguise down.
Hahaha!
Yes, the little cushion pops out if you push that button.
It’s to lean your arm.
That is if you can stop yourself from looking at it.
Cute huh?
Almost seems like the chameleon’s tongue is about to lick...
Baby lizard looks like it’s slowly moving forward.
Like a chameleon.
Hahahaha!
Those compartments are for all your remotes. Dvd, vcr, tv, dstv.
Backup batteries in the back. That compartment there.
That big slot is for your dstv guide and that The You or O magazine, as you enjoy.
That little holder is for your spectacles.
If you push the button next to that one, the foot pedestal lifts.
But you can rotate it right through 90 degrees, just as you desire.
The inside... well, let’s just say it massages your calves, heels... even your feet.
You can control the speed and pressure with that button. "
Yes.
"You can switch it off, of course. But I thought... with your leg..."
Uhm.
Pleasure.
"Come.
There's something else I want to show you.
Push that button."
Yes.
Push.
"There you go."
(Lollipop - Mika starts playing in between on CD player. Moderately loud.)
"Yes, a home entertainment theatre like no other.
Once you push that button, the lights dim a bit.
The speakers come out from the wall in that corner to your left and to my right.
The screen rolls from the roof.
Projector at the back.
Top of the wall.
Great huh.
Ten by seven foot."
Her eyes looked like they were about to pop out.
"The projector is connected to the laptop there by your side.
Simple and convenient.
I have all your originals in the cupboard over there, but I copied them all to the laptop.
Those that could be copied.
Your favourites.
Kill Bill, The Rocky Horror Show, Queen, Live, Guns N’ Roses, Muse, Jason Mraz, etcetera etcetera etcetera (I say in my best King and I accent) and such...
There are those I still wanted us to watch together, but... Alas.
It's Everybody hates Chris and Boondocks.
Chris was also bullied, just like me, but he remembers it with humour, just as I also want to think about my own.
What does not kill you just makes you Stronger.
Haha!
It's absolutely hilarious!"
Yes.
Uhm.
"I have another surprise for you.
I’ll put the uplifting CD softer."
(Lollipop comes to an end and My Interpretation Mika starts playing softly.)
"Do you see that mirror on your left that covers the entire wall from floor to ceiling?
Push that button, right there, and see what happens.
Preferably when you are watching Finding Nemo.
Yes, it’s also on the laptop.
But any time you want.
With the Nemo effect or without.
It’s especially for you.
Never understood your obsession with fish, but you like them, so there.
You love Finding Nemo, so I went into Sherwin mode.
Wanted you to experience the movie differently.
Like you’re one of the characters.