As I wait to be served I replay the kiss I’ve just shared with Jen. Who would have known that she could kiss like that? My heart beats faster and I can feel the blood soaring through my body. I just wish it had been somewhere private and hadn’t been for show. I take in a deep breath to try and restore myself.
I’ve decided that I want to be with her, my feelings for Jen are beginning to grow and I can no longer resist them. Okay, there is a little age difference but not that much. I just can’t give her up. Between her and my career, it’s her I want. I have never loved anyone and I have never had anyone who cared about me. Except my grandmother, buts she’s no longer here.
God I miss her, she was kind and would do anything for me. She knew what useless parents I had and tried everything she could to make my life happier. It’s finally my turn and I pay for our breakfast. I can’t help smiling when I turn round expecting to see her waiting at the table.
My happy mood instantly disperses as I find just an empty seat. I begin to look around the whole restaurant, frantically trying to spot her… nothing. Panic begins to stir from deep within the pit of my stomach. The anxiety begins to make my heart pound against my chest.
I push past people to escape outside, my eyes scanning up and down the street. No sign… I decide to run in the direction to my place. Why would she go off like that? The panic begins to get worse and images begin to race through my mind. I start to think about those men with guns who came looking for her. Shit, I really need to report this. I slow down to a walk and grab my phone from my pocket.
I dial the commander’s office; I am dead and if something does happen to her, I’ll be out of a job. That’s not all; if anything happens to her I’ll blame myself. I should have insisted she came with me and never let her out of my sight. Fuck, this is all messed up.
The Chiefs booming voice hits me hard. “Forbes? How’s the operation going?”
I cringe at his words, referring to Jen as an operation. She is much more than that to me now. Way too much more. Please let her be there, please I chant in my head.
“Sir, the operation has had a minor hiccup” I try to keep my voice firm. I know he will be able to sense the panic.
“What’s happened?”
“Jennifer Hopkins...” I pause and take in a deep breath. “Well… She’s...”
“Forbes! Quit going around the houses and spit it out boy.”
“She’s disappeared. We were having breakfast, I went to pay and when I turned round she was gone.” My voice breaks on the last word and I have to blink back tears. What is wrong with me? I have taken this case to heart. No not the case, Jen. I have fallen madly head over heels for her and it is unprofessional.
That’s why she went missing today because I wasn’t focused on the main aim of this job- keeping her safe.
“SHIT!” He yells down the phone. I stop outside my apartment building. I’m ready to listen to my telling off. I deserve everything he says to me. I know I am finished now and I really don’t care. I just want my Jen safe and sound.
“This is a big problem, Forbes. Are you still in Summerton?”
I close my eyes and rest up against a wall. “No,” I quietly reply. “We’re in Seattle. After the gun men came I confessed everything to her. We’re here looking for her father.”
“For crying out loud… Do you understand what a risk you have taken? That poor girl could be anywhere now. You know how desperation Mario Lopez is for that money and we don’t even have a clear understanding of what her father’s involvement is.”
“I know…”
“Well if you knew why did you do such a crazy thing? Right, we need to move fast. I’m going to send a few men out and try to see if we can find anything. I’ll also call the IT and see if we can’t trace the tracker on her phone. You, search everywhere you think she would go.” He pauses and I can hear his teeth grind. “I’m warning you, Forbes. If this all goes pear shape you can bet your ass you’ll be out of a job.”
“Yes sir,” I weakly reply. “You have no idea how bad I feel.”
“Yeah, yeah, yeah” his voice is sharp. “Just find her!” He hangs up and I bring the phone away from my ear.
I feel numb and my body is unwilling to move. I need to know that she is safe inside. I wipe away a tear that rolls down my cheek. I never thought I would feel this way about anyone. After watching the train wreck of my parents marriage and watching my father slip into a dark depression. I told myself I would never love anyone. I would never end up the mess he did. I’ve barely started my career and already fallen for someone.
I can’t stand here feeling sorry for myself. I charge towards my apartment. Please let her be here. I want to enter my home and see her beautiful face. Then I will confess everything I feel for her. Get her father and take her home safely. I barge through my front door and start calling out her name. Frantically I search each room only to discover she isn’t there.
I make my way back to the living room and collapse on the sofa. All my fears are made real. She’s gone. I place my head in my hands and close my eyes tight. This is bringing back dark memories that I thought I had erased. That afternoon when I came home from school to find my mother gone and him sat in the corner completely out of his face. A pain hits my chest as I recall the first beating he gave me. After all it had to be my fault she left. Anyone in their right mind would prefer to leave a child rather than a raging alcoholic. In her case she left both.
“What’s with all the noise” Tucker says entering the living room. I look up at him all sleepy and rubbing his eyes.
“Jen’s gone missing.” I jump to my feet. I’ve had enough of dealing with my dark demons. I need to get out there and I need Tucker for back up. “Get dressed.”
“Why?” He yawns. “I’ve just finished a twelve hour shift.”
“I don’t care” I yell, disappearing to my room and reappearing a few seconds later with my gun in hand. “We need to go to her father’s house. That’s where Mario’s bitch lives.”
Tucker raises his hands in defeat. “Ok, but why would you think she is there? Didn’t you say she was from this area? Maybe she is visiting friends?”
I spin round to face him, anger and panic pulsating through my body. “You don’t get it, do you? These people are desperate for this money. They have already sent men with guns. We have no idea what they will do next.”
Tucker tilts his head and looks at me for a second. My heart is beating fast and my breathing is erratic. “You’ve got it bad” he whispers before heading back to his room.
I try to calm myself down but nothing helps. He returns a few minutes later, tucking his gun in the back of his jeans. “Come on, let’s find your girl and get you that happy ending.”
I roll my eyes as I follow him out. “All I want is her to be safe.”
He quickly looks over his shoulder. “Yeah, it’s all about the job.”
I grab hold of his shoulder, spinning him round to face me. “Look, stop going on. Jen could be in great danger and yes I’m concerned. If something happens it will be down to me.”
The smug grin drops from his face and his eyes burn into me. “Ayden, I’ve known you for years. You’re like a brother to me. So, don’t go putting on this macho shit with me. I know you love her and we will find her.”
“Love is a little strong” I mumble looking down at my feet. He is right through.
“Whatever” he strolls out of our building and heads straight to the car. “Have you tried calling her?”
I freeze on the spot. “No!”
Tucker turns to face me again and rolls his eyes. “Did you call anyone?”
“Yeah.”
“Who.”
“The chief” I cringe.
“Great, you’re really not with it, are you?” He grabs my keys off me. “I’ll drive… I don’t fancy getting into an accident and dying today.” He opens the car door and I get in. “You should try ringing her” he says, slammin
g the door behind me. I pull my phone out of my pocket and if on cue it begins to ring.
“Is that the chief?” Tucker asks as he sorts the driver’s seat out.
“Nope, its worse.” I really don’t want to answer, but I know she will be worried like hell. I hit the answer button. “Hello, Ms Hopkins.”
“You’ve lost my daughter!” She shouts down the phone. I look over at Tucker who is just staring at me. “I’ve tried calling her but there is no answer. It just keeps going to voicemail.” At least there’s my answer to ringing Jen. “I trusted you, Ayden. You’re meant to be protecting her. I should have never of let her go with you. Say something Ayden!” Her voice is frantic and I hear her sobs.
Once again I feel bad. She’s right, I’m meant to be protecting Jen. I let everything get too relaxed and I didn’t keep my eye on the ball. I swallow back the lump in my own throat. “I don’t know what to say, Ms Hopkins. I’m sorry and I promise you, we are looking for her now.”
“That isn’t good enough,” she sighs and begins to cry harder. “How did you lose her?”
I bow my head. I don’t like hearing her misery which has been brought on by me. “We were having breakfast and I went to pay. When I turned round she was just gone.”
“Oh Jennifer” she sobs. “I want her back, Ayden.”
“I know and I will do everything I can to find her.” I nod to Tucker and he starts up the car. “The first place I am going to check is her dads. I have already called the chief and he’s getting extra men to search. He’ll also be tracing the tracking device in her phone.”
“I don’t know what I will do if…”
“There are no ifs!” I cut her off. “We will find her and by the end of this, everything will be over. You’ll be able to have a decent life without looking over your shoulders. Trust me, Ms Hopkins.”
“I do… Its them I don’t trust.”
“Good bye, I’ll keep you updated.”
“Yes, of course. Good bye, Ayden” with that she finally ends the call. I turn my head and watch as Seattle goes by. “Next the next turn right and head on to the freeway” I instruct not once looking at him.
“Who was that?”
“Jen’s mother. She can’t get hold of her and is beginning to panic.” I rub my brow. A headache is beginning to come on. No doubt from all the stress. I’m getting a strange idea that Jen wondered off on purpose. But why, she can’t be that stupid?
“Are you sure she hasn’t just gone to meet friends?”
“No!” I yell. “She would have told me or picked up the phone. I know exactly what she planned to do. She went off to talk to her father. She’ll be at his, I know it.”
“And what if she isn’t?
I shake my head and carry on staring out of the window. “We find her and pray we get there in time.”