Chapter 18
Present day…
Samuel had stayed back at the house while Christian left in the ambulance with Hannah. As he now prepared supper for himself, a knock on the door drew his attention to the side of the dawdi haus. He opened up the door to see Christian standing on the small porch with a duffel bag in his hand.
“Christian? How's Hannah doing? Is she all right?” Samuel’s brows lowered.
“I'm moving in here with you, Samuel,” Christian stated matter-of-factly.
“Why?”
“Hannah is shunned to me now.” He stood stock still, his expression stone cold.
“What's going on, Christian?” None of this made any sense to Samuel.
“I no longer have a wife.”
Samuel panicked. “Hannah...she is dot?”
“To me, she is.”
“Christian, please. You're not making any sense. Where is Hannah?” Samuel asked.
“She is at the hospital,” Christian answered.
“What happened? Why do you say she is shunned to you?”
“I cannot say. You must ask the woman,” Christian said. “I'm going to sleep now.” He walked toward a small bedroom and noticed Samuel's things already occupied the small room. He ambled into the second bedroom and shut the door behind him.
Samuel walked the corridor of the hospital, determined to find out what happened between Hannah and Christian. Like it or not, Hannah was going to have to speak with him. Christian had never been so distressed as to keep his thoughts and feelings bottled up within himself. Samuel had to get to the bottom of this. He would not sit back and watch Christian and Hannah throw their marriage away. Life was too precious to waste it on altercations.
Samuel entered Hannah's room as she wiped away a tear. “Hannah. What happened between you and Christian?”
“I knew it, Samuel. I knew this would happen,” Hannah cried shaking her head.
“What are you talking about? What happened?”
“Don't you see, Samuel? All of these things that are happening – you losing Carolanne, me losing my bopplin, Christian hating me now – it's what we deserve. God is punishing us for our sin,” Hannah said miserably.
Samuel didn't know if Hannah was delirious or not, but finding the answers to why she and Christian were at odds could wait. Her mental and spiritual state were obviously more pressing issues. “Is that what you believe, Hannah? Everything bad that happens in life is because we've done something wrong? That is not how it works, Hannah. When God forgives us, He forgives us fully, unconditionally. The Bible says that He doesn't even remember our sins once they are forgiven. God doesn't hold our sins over our heads and use them to punish us. Jesus took the punishment for us when He shed His blood on the cross,” Samuel insisted.
“Then tell me why all these bad things keep happening, Samuel. I want to know. Because surely God could stop them if He wanted to,” Hannah spat out bitterly.
“I don't know why, but I do know God can be trusted. Give Him your cares, Hannah. You don't have to bear this burden alone.”
Hannah shook her head. “I can't, Samuel. God doesn't listen to me anymore. I know He doesn't love me.”
“Hannah, that's not true and you know it.”
“Samuel, please. Just leave me alone. I don't want to talk about God anymore. God has failed me.”
“Hannah –” Samuel's words cut off when Hannah reached over and flicked the television on with the remote. She turned up the volume to drown out Samuel's unwanted words. Resigned to Hannah's wishes, Samuel left the hospital room. Perhaps he'd be able to talk some sense in to Christian.
Samuel had waited till morning to speak with Christian, hoping a fresh start would mellow out some of the tension of the night before. “Christian, I don't know what's going on between you and Hannah, but you've got to work this out.” Samuel and Christian sat at the small table in the dawdi haus with mugs of hot morning coffee.
“You don't understand, Samuel. Your wife, she was different than Hannah.”
“Nee, not so different. She was human; she made mistakes too. We all make mistakes,” Samuel said.
“No. Not like this,” Christian insisted.
“Don't throw your marriage away because of one argument. I'm sure whatever it is, you and Hannah can work this out. Life is too short not to. Trust me on this, I know what I speak of.”
“You have no idea what this is about, Samuel. How can you tell me that?” Christian huffed.
“There isn't anything God can't help you through. Seek His Word for guidance. If you don't want to talk to me about it, then confide in Bishop Hostettler or one of the ministers. You have to live with Hannah for the rest of your life,” Samuel reasoned.
“Maybe I have to share the same property with her, but I don't have to speak with her. I'll be living in the dawdi haus with you now, Samuel. And I'd like you to arrange a ride home from the hospital for Hannah. I don't want to see her.” Christian scooted his chair back from the table and emptied the remainder of his coffee in the kitchen sink.
“Christian, I understand that you need time. I will do that for you. But please consider what I have said. I would give just about anything to have another day with Carolanne.”
Christian nodded, then went to fetch his hat to begin work for the day.
Hannah hadn't spoken to him the entire trip home. Samuel was at a loss as to what to do, so he silently prayed that Christian and Hannah would work out whatever it was that was causing such heartbreak.
After he helped Hannah down from the buggy, Samuel joined Christian in the field. Christian seemed just as tight-lipped as Hannah, so Samuel did not push the issue. He knew that Christian never could keep his feelings bottled up for long, so he patiently waited until he was ready to speak. Sooner or later he’d share what was on his heart.
“How did you know, Samuel?” Christian said out of the blue.
“How did I know what?” Samuel puzzled.
“How did you know that Carolanne would make a gut fraa?”
Samuel thought it odd that Christian would ask such a strange question. He shrugged. “Well, she was kind. She had a good reputation. She was schee.” Samuel smiled.
“Hannah was all that too. How is it that she's turned out to be a Jezebel?” His face contorted at the words.
A bomb falling from the sky couldn’t have shocked Samuel more. “How can you say that, Christian? You have a gut fraa.”
“You don't know her any better than I thought I did. She is a harlot and a murderer,” he said stonily.
Samuel’s face sobered. “What are you talking about, Christian?”
“Hannah. She...she had an abortion before we married. The boppli was not mine.”
Samuel covered his eyes with his hand. “Hannah did? But how? When?”
Christian shrugged. “Ask her.”