A cold smile appeared on Connor’s face.
“Your best friend isn’t as perfect as you might think. Seems like I’m not the only one who toys with people’s emotions,” he said, his voice hard and icy.
I stared at him, completely confused and scared.
“She never did anything wrong,” I said, trying to sound confident.
"You sure about that? You know you’re talking about Bella, right? The same girl who is playing around with three guys?”
I frowned and glared at him.
“Playing around? I thought that was your specialty. And first of all, she barely even knows Jack, so I don’t know how she could possibly be using him. And as for Liam? I think he might be the only one she might actually like. You’re the player, the badass. The one who ‘humps and dumps’. Isn’t that the term you use?” I asked, my heart racing from all the anger I was feeling.
Connor’s eyes narrowed and he took a step closer, his body pressing to mine.
“I only slept with Sammy so that Bella would get jealous,” he snarled, his hot breath fanning over my face, causing my breath to hitch in my throat.
“B-but why?” I asked.
“Cause I like her!” he said, backing away and throwing his hands up in the air in frustration.
My eyes widened as I took this in.
“You should never, ever sleep with someone in order to get someone else,” I scolded him as I noticed the Sammy girl stepping onto the porch.
“Listen, Jess. That’s your name, right?” she asked.
I nodded my head slightly, not liking the tone of her voice. “If a girl is going to ignore you and play hard to get, the best way to get her is to make her jealous,” she said, acting like she was stating an obvious fact.
I scoffed and crossed my arms. “Listen up, Connor. Bella has been through hell and back. So making her jealous? You’re just hurting her. She’s an amazing person. And you know what? You’re not worthy of her. She deserves better.” My voice was venomous. And I watched as Connor scowled and took a slight step forward.
“Are you saying I can’t have her?”
“Exactly,” I said, lifting my head up a little.
A mischievous look sparkled in his eyes. “I get what I want. As for what I can’t have? Well, I don’t easily give up.” He turned to walk back inside, Sammy in front of him.
“You don’t get it!” I cried out in frustration, causing him to turn around in annoyance. “This isn’t some game. Bella isn’t like the other girls you’ve gone through before.” Once again I found myself trapped as Connor advanced towards me.
“You would know, right?” he said softly, the venom unmistakable. “You were one of the easy ones.”
I couldn’t help it, I let his words get to me as tears welled up in my eyes and my bottom lip quivered—telltale signs that I was going to cry any second.
“What’s going on?”
Both Connor and I were so distracted at that moment, we didn’t even notice James pull up in his car, with Matt.
“Jess was just leaving,” Connor said, backing away from me.
I quickly wiped my cheek as a tear escaped. Without another word, I walked off the porch, heading towards my car. Just as I walked past Matt and James, a hand grabbed my arm, forcing me to stop. I looked up to see James studying my face, and I saw his look of concern.
“What did you do?” he snapped at Connor.
I busily wiped away the tears that were now flowing uncontrollably down my face.
“Nothing,” Connor said with an uncaring shrug.
Something in me snapped as I looked up to glare at him—a short, bitter laugh escaping from me.
“You may have been able to get away with all the crap you’ve pulled over the years. But I swear to God, Connor. Don’t you dare hurt Bella! She has been through way too much and she doesn’t need you to put her through all this emotional pain. She’s already been hurt, physically hurt. She doesn’t deserve to be emotionally and mentally abused, too.” With that, I yanked my arm away from James and left without another word. Just as I turned the corner, I couldn’t help but glance back at them. Their faces were pale and they looked completely shocked. And only then did it hit me.
I just told them Bella’s biggest secret. More specifically, I just told Connor Michaels.
I groaned and banged my head on the steering wheel.
How am I going to tell Bella this?
Bella
I was being melodramatic. By then, my cut had stopped bleeding. But I still stayed there, curled up on the hard ground. I must have spent what seemed like hours thinking over what happened—more like convincing myself that I didn’t deserve it.
If there’s anything I believe in, it’s that everything happens for a reason. At the hospital and in therapy, a lot of people told me that. It wasn’t until after I got out that I realized they were right.
What doesn’t kill you makes you stronger.
I shouldn’t feel weak or vulnerable anymore. I’ve been through a lot. So letting Connor get to me? That was ridiculous. I’m better than him. I don’t need him fucking up my life. Barely even two months of school had passed and already I couldn’t wait to leave it.
It shouldn’t be that way.
I took a deep breath and stood up, my legs shaking a bit. Then, I suddenly remembered something—something that happened last night.
Flashback
“Bella, you are really drunk,” Liam said. A look of concern loomed over his perfect features, reminding me why I liked him.
“Come on, let’s get you a drink,” I said as I wrapped my arms around his neck.
He frowned and gripped my arms, gently removing them away from his face. “I don’t drink,” he said slowly.
“Why not?” I asked, my eyes wide and my feet a bit wobbly.
He steadied me, looking seriously before he spoke. “My sister was ki——”
“Boring!” I yelled, giggling afterwards.
Liam stared at me, looking surprised, before his expression hardened. Then, he pushed me away, stalking off. I stared at him, completely confused, before chasing after him. I miraculously managed to catch up with him, grabbing his arm and forcing him to stop.
“What’sss… the matterrr… with youuu?” I slurred.
Liam looked completely pissed then as he glared down at me. “Leave me alone, Bella.”
I gripped his arm tightly, refusing to let him walk away.
“Why?” I asked, confused as to why he was acting so mean.
“Why? Bella, are you serious?” he asked, leaning in a bit.
“Isss… this because… I didn’t want to listen… to your ssstupid ssstory?” I guessed.
A look of pain and hurt came over Liam’s face then and he yanked his arm out of my grip.
“You’re heartless!” he spat out. “We’re through. I thought you were different, Bella, but I was sadly mistaken.”
I let out a sickened noise and dropped my head into my hands, tears threatening to fall down my face again at any second.
How could I have said that to Liam? Just the thought of it made me want to throw up. I was disgusted with myself—ashamed that I would say that. I have to find him and apologize, I thought to myself. Looking around, it was only then that I realized I had no idea where I was.
I sighed. This was the price of being a drama queen.
“Limmy! I want to go on the swings!”
I turned to see an adorable little girl bound up the hill and towards the playground, giggling and shrieking with delight. I couldn’t help but smile as she ran towards the swing set, her arms flailing. I looked around for someone else, a parent or sibling. Seeing no one there, I frowned and turned back just as she tripped, hitting the ground hard.
“Oh no!” I gasped, running over to her, picking up speed as her sobs rang out. I quickly kneeled down, lifting her slightly so that she was in a sitting position.
“Honey, are you okay?” I asked, wiping the dirt off her arms and checki
ng for any scratches or cuts.
“Where’s Limmy?” she wailed, standing up.
I quickly stood up, looking around once more.
“Who’s Limmy?”
“M-my uncle! Where did he go?” she asked, holding onto my leg as she sobbed. My maternal instinct kicked in, and I picked her up, holding her to my side. She put her arms around my neck as she continued to cry.
“Lily! Lily, come back here!”
The little girl immediately stopped crying and pushed me away, causing me to nearly drop her. I set her on the ground and she ran towards another running figure.
“Limmy!” she cried out, hugging the guy around his legs.
He lifted up the little girl, holding her as I did just moments before.
“Never run away again, okay?” he gently scolded her, holding her close.
She nodded, burying her face into his neck. The guy looked at me, finally giving me a clear view of his face.
“Thank y——. Bella?”
My eyes widened as he stared at me, disbelief on his face. I looked from Lily to Liam, completely confused.
“Limmy! Swings!” Lily said.
Liam quickly put her on the ground, allowing her to run to the swing set. But she slowed down a bit to make sure she wouldn’t fall again.
“Kick your legs back and forth like I taught you!” Liam called out as she hopped onto the swing, kicking her legs as instructed.
“So… Limmy?” I asked, amusement shining in my eyes.
Liam almost smiled back. Almost.
“I should go,” he said as he was about to walk past me.
I panicked and grabbed his arm, forcing him to stop. I felt him stiffen, and there was a cold expression on his face.
“Wait, please,” I whispered, moving so that I was standing directly in front of him.
He frowned and looked down on me. “Bella…”
“I’m so sorry,” I blurted out, grasping his hands in an attempt to force him to stay. “I was wasted. And I know, I know that’s not an excuse,” I rushed out. “But I-I’m so sorry!”
Liam looked away from me before speaking.
“I get it. You didn’t mean what you said. It’s fine. Whatever.” His voice was cold and emotionless, causing me to flinch back.
“Liam, I am so…”
“Sorry. Yeah, I heard you.” He roughly grabbed his arms away and moved as if he was about to sidestep me.
Tears were pricking the corners of my eyes, but I willed them to stay away.
“I hate myself for what I did to you. I can’t forgive myself and you shouldn’t either. I was such an insensitive bitch.” My voice cracked at the end, causing me to stare at the ground to let my hair shield me.
Then, a warm hand gripped my chin firmly, forcing me to look up.
“So you remember then. Everything?”
“Y-yes.”
“Do you know what I was about to say?” he asked, leaning down so that his face was mere inches away from mine.
“I-I don’t know,” I whispered, trying to pull away.
His grip tightened, not enough to hurt, but enough to let me know that I wouldn’t be able to get away.
“What do you think I was about to say?”
“I don’t know!” I cried out, pushing his hand off my face.
He reacted quickly, looping his arms around my waist. “You shouldn’t drink,” he stated, his eyes searching my face.
But then, it’s pretty safe to say that I’m a stubborn bitch. And I don’t like people telling me what to do.
“Why not? Why do you care so much?” I snapped, placing my hands on his chest, trying to push him away.
His grip tightened around me, causing my body to press against his. His expression was a combination of hurt, anger, and pain.
“Because I can’t lose you.”
I dropped my hands and stared at him, astonished. He pulled away, taking a couple of steps back.
“What…?”
“My sister’s friends were wasted and they tried to make her drink. She didn’t want to so she left the party to go home. On her way home, she got in a car crash and was killed on the spot by a drunken driver.”
My throat tightened and I took a step forward. “Is Lily…?”
“Her daughter. She was twenty-six when she was killed. Lily is five years old, almost six, now,” he said.
I put my arms around his neck, giving him a hug.
“You're an amazing person. Looking out for me and all,” I whispered, pulling away slightly to look him in the eyes.
Maybe it was the moment, or how right it felt to be in his arms.
I kissed him.
“Limmy?”
We broke apart. I was blushing furiously while Liam grinned as if he had just won the lottery. Lily was standing only two feet away from us, her head tilted to the side, sporting a confused expression.
“Lily?”
“Can we get ice cream?” she asked excitedly, clapping her hands as an ice cream truck drove up.
Liam smiled and grabbed her hand along with mine, leading us to the truck. I grinned and looked up at Liam as he handed the guy the money, and laughed as Lily pretty much dunked her face in the ice cream.
I giggled as he turned around, handing me the vanilla cone.
“You didn't…”
“I wanted to.”
Three hours later
I pulled away, breathing heavily. “Thank you for taking me home,” I whispered, staring up into his eyes.
“My pleasure.” Then he grinned and pulled away, walking off the porch.
Opening the front door and quickly closing it behind me, I touched my lips lightly, enjoying the tingling sensation that was still there.
“Bella?”
I was surprised to see Jess standing in my living room.
“Jess? Oh, I’m so sorry for…”
“I did something bad. Really bad!”
Chapter 14
My guard came up, and I looked at her cautiously as she took a slight step towards my direction. The guilty look on her face caused me to stiffen in fear.
“What did you do?” I asked in a hushed tone, my hands getting clammy.
“I-I-I…” But she paused and looked at the ground before looking back up at me. “I… er, called you a bitch for running off.”
I stared at her in disbelief, raising an eyebrow in question.
“That’s the bad thing you did?” I asked, slowly walking up to her.
She looked around frantically, before finally looking back up in my eyes.
“Yeah,” she replied, but her tone sounded unsure.
I watched her closely, not speaking for a moment as she stared back, but some confidence seemed to be leaking back into her.
“Okay,” I said with a shrug, heading towards the kitchen. “You know, Jess, you really scared me there for a second.” When she didn’t respond, I looked back. Something was not right. She looked so distraught. I sighed, then walked back to her and placed my hands on her shoulders.
“What happened?”
“Nothing,” she said in a mere whisper.
I gave her a stern look, with a little bit of annoyance mixed in.
“I just feel bad,” she said.
Now, that was the truth.
“About?”
She sighed, twisting her hands around before gripping them firmly together. “I said things that I shouldn’t have because I was worried about you.”
I nodded and let a small smile creep on my face. “Well, here. You’re a bitch.”
Her eyes widened and she stared at me, shocked. “Wha——”
“Now, we’re even,” I said, grabbing her arm and dragging her to the kitchen.
She stiffened but still followed me, a conflicted look on her face.
After we made pasta, we sat down on the couch and watched The Notebook.
“Bella?”
I pulled my eyes away from the gorgeous, shirtless Ryan Gosling, pausing the movie as I did so.
“Yeah?”
“You can’t keep doing this.”
I frowned and stared at her for a moment, trying to understand what she meant by that.
“I can’t keep doing what?” I asked, confused.
She looked at the floor, as if trying to find the words to say. “You need to pick. You can’t continue leading them on, Connor, Jack, and Liam.”
“Where is this coming from?” I asked, feeling defensive.
She exhaled, that conflicted look returning to her face.
“I don’t know. It’s just… It’s not right,” she said, looking at me.
I felt annoyed and angry that she was defending them. Well, Connor in particular.
“It’s not right?” I repeated, my tone almost deadly. “What’s not right is sleeping with all those girls while exclaiming to the world, that this one…” I pointed to myself, “is yours. Like you own her. That’s not right. Connor is nothing but a piece of scum. Jack. Well, I don’t even know him, so I don’t know how I could possibly be leading him on. And Liam? We might actually have something!” I exclaimed, throwing my hands up in the air. “I really like him and I would never, ever, lead him on.”
Jess stared at me, completely speechless. “But your mum said…”
“But I say that it’s Liam. I got to see a side of him that I never knew. And you know what? I like it. He’s sweet, caring, loving. All the things that Connor will never be,” I said, my voice shaking.
“A side of L—”
“Yes. He has been through a lot, with his sister and all…” I said, trailing off so I wouldn’t give anything away. It had seemed to me that he wanted to keep it a secret, and I respected that.
“What do you…?”
“I think you should go,” I snapped, letting my anger get the best of me.
Jess’ eyes widened, hurt flashing through them. Reluctantly, she stood, leaving without another word. She just turned her head and gave me a look before she went. As soon as she left, I let out a shaky breath that I didn’t know I had been holding.
Connor made me so mad. I knew what Jess said must have been because of what Connor said to her, assuming that they talked after I ran off.