I pick it up. “Hello?”
“Do you want answers?”
“Harlow?”
“Just answer the question.”
“Yes.”
“Tell you what,” Harlow says. “I’ll give you the next five minutes to think about it. We can give you answers but everything has a cost attached to it. If you’re willing to pay the price, then we can talk.”
“Wait!” I say before he hangs up. “Harlow, I don’t need five minutes. I don’t even need a minute. I’ve made my decision.”
“Okay then,” he says. “Meet me at the bridge, tomorrow. Alone. I’ll text you the time.”
Bedtime Blues
TEAGUE
“Why does Holden have to be such a jerk?” Mia says, as we lie in bed soon after Jamie has left.
“He’s not a jerk,” I say, as Mia inches closer to me and places her arm on my chest.
“He’s kind of a jerk.”
“Mia, he loves her,” I tell her. “Even I could see that and I don’t see anything! Ever. He misses her, it’s obvious but he’s being a stubborn son-of-a-bitch, that’s all.”
“I’d be furious if you left me pregnant and with no one to help.”
“You know I didn’t even think about that until today. And now that you said it, we’re her friends, right? We can do what Holden is supposed to do, can’t we?”
“We can. But wouldn’t it be weird?”
“Mia, two of our best friends are both in love with the same woman and now they don’t know who the father is. I think we’re way past weird, don’t you?”
“You think Daniel’s really in love with her?”
“I know he is,” I say. “But in case you haven’t noticed, Jamie wants Holden.”
“So it’s decided,” Mia says. “Starting tomorrow, Jamie will not be going to the doctor’s office alone. We will help her out every way we can.”
“Even if Holden gets mad at us.”
“You think he will?”
“He was lashing out at me for siding with Jamie verbally. How do you think he’s going to react when we’re actually doing something for her?”
“Won’t that put a strain on your friendship?”
“Mia. There have been a lot of strains on our friendships throughout the years. Nothing has ever caused it to break. Real life is full of problems, misunderstandings, bad shit happens to people all the time. Everyone reacts differently to all that happens to them which is why those strains happen in every relationship. But at the end of the day, you have look past all of that and choose the relationship over everything else.”
Mia climbs on top of me and straddles me on the bed. “You know you’re sexy when you’re sweet.”
“I am?”
She laughs. “Yes!”
Her mouth lowers on my abdomen and she kisses me on my chest. “I love that you care so much about your friends,” she says. “I love that you care so much about me. That you’re able to look past everything and help your friends. I love that when you say you’re friends with someone, you make sure that it’s the most important thing in the world to you. You take every relationship seriously, and I love that, Teague. I’m lucky I found you and I’m lucky you found me, for however long that lasts.”
“However long that lasts?” I say. “Excuse me? Don’t you know that I’m with you for life?”
“Forever is a long time, Teague. I don’t want us to be bound. I don’t want us to be together because we made some contract on paper. I see people, every day, who would have been better off marrying someone else but can’t leave their contracts because of their children or their assets or their social status. I want you to promise me that will never be us?”
I pull her towards me and kiss her. “That will never be us, Mia. I promise.”
“I can deal with a lot but I can’t deal with lies.”
“And I will never lie to you.”
“Promise?”
“Promise.”
We kiss again. This time, when she breaks off she runs her tongue over my pecs. “Don’t start what you can’t finish, Mia.”
She giggles like a schoolgirl.
I feel her hand covering my balls and she gives them a slight squeeze. “Fuck, Mia! Stop that!”
But instead she starts using her hand to stroke me and that just does it. I get up, and tackle her on to the bed on her back, get on top of her and force my cock into her mouth. “Start sucking, baby girl.”
“Yes sir,” she giggles again.
The Meeting
HOLDEN
Promptly at midnight an SUV pulls up.
I toss my cigarette aside and start walking towards it when its headlights start flashing. When I’m next to the SUV the back door opens and I see the familiar face of Harlow’s crony sitting in the back, waiting. And that’s not all. There are cable-ties in his hand and a blindfold. Fuck. Not again.
“Get in we don’t have all day,” Ronnie says, impatient as ever.
“Yeah,” I retort. “It’s a busy life abducting people and putting them in blindfolds.”
“Just get in,” Harlow’s heavy voice comes from the front of the SUV.
I climb into the car and close the door.
Fight or Flight
TEAGUE
“What is this place?” Sebastian asks, as we enter the arena and two bruisers frisk us for weapons. He looks like the most of out of place person in here but I had no choice. Holden’s going through his own problems and there’s no way Mia is ever going to be okay with this much violence.
“It’s an underground cage fight,” I explain, as we enter the place where the fights take place. There’s a throng of people, betting and giving advice and talking non-stop and the place is full of excitement. Sebastian grimaces when he sees one of the fighters in the cage throw an upper cut to his opponent and we see teeth flying about and landing everywhere on the floor.
“Why would you want to see this?” Sebastian asks.
“Because it’s awesome!” I say and move right up to the cage so we can actually smell the blood, sweat and fear from inside the cage.
The fight ends soon enough and I start unbuttoning my shirt.
Sebastian just stares at me. “Teague,” he says. “What do you think you’re doing?”
“What does it look like I’m doing?” I say, loud enough to be heard over the ruckus and grin but Sebastian is taking this way too seriously than I thought he would.
“Oh no no no!” he says. “There’s no way I’m letting you go in there! These people are nuts, Teague! Did you not see the teeth flying about just now? I’m pretty sure toothless and fucked wouldn’t be a good look for you. I’m also pretty sure that Mia wouldn’t approve of all this.”
“I know,” I say. “That’s why you’re here!”
I toss my shirt towards him and he barely manages to catch it in time. “Teague, no!” he yells but I walk up to the corner man and tell him I’m ready. I start putting on a wrap but they tell me they don’t do wraps so I toss that aside.
“It’s bare knuckles all the way!” the guy tells me.
“No problem!” I say.
“You’re sure, kid?” he asks. “Cause it looks to me like maybe you’re out of your depth in here.”
“Just announce the fight,” I say and start preparing myself.
“It’s your funeral, kid.”
The fight is announced and the man who walks in is about my weight and height, a bit more muscular and bald, and his face is a mess of cuts and bruises which tells me that this isn’t the first fight he’s in. He bares his extremely white teeth at me and I don’t do anything because I honestly don’t know the protocol here. I haven’t been coming here long but I’ve been training hard and watching a lot of fights for research, and I hope that’s going to be enough.
The one thing people don’t tell you about fighting is that you just need to start. You need to just take that step forward and get hit or start hitting. I try to deliver the first hit but the guy ducks and
instead ends up hitting me right in the face. So, I make another move and put all my weight into my next punch, and aim for the guy’s chest. Bam. My knuckles hit bones and I can feel them reverberating from the impact. I can feel the guy getting angry and I can tell that he wasn’t really taking me seriously up until that point. He knows that I know technique and he knows that I can deliver a solid hit.
He knuckles punch me in the stomach next, and I’m still recovering from that when he hits me again in the face, almost exactly where he did before and my nose starts to bleed.
That’s it.
The minute I get that hard blow, the adrenaline kicks in and I’m no longer afraid.
The Meeting
HOLDEN
Ronnie pushes me forward and I almost stumble and fall on my face. Harlow rebukes him for it and they have a little bit of a pissing contest. I still can’t see and my hands are tied behind my back so I can’t really move and have to rely on Ronnie to push me in the right direction. So far I haven’t run into any walls so I suppose I should be grateful for that considering who these guys are. Also, I’ve just now realized the error of my ways. Coming here with these two without any form of security may have been an ill-advised, spur-of-the-moment decision that I’m starting to regret. I regret it even more when they take off the blindfold and I find myself standing in the middle of what seems like a makeshift office, with badly plastered dark walls and dim lights. The face of the person sitting on the other end of what seems like a flea market bought desk, isn’t even visible to me, all I can see are shadows.
“Hello?” I say because all of them are silent for some reason.
The man in the shadows stands from his chair, and I can see the vague silhouette of an older male, late-fifties perhaps, sturdy build and he looks a little out of place in this setting. He’s not some cardboard cutout character out of some Mob movie like Harlow or Ronnie. This man is different. He looks like he’s about to discuss some business mergers. Even his suit is expensive; a current catalog Pierre Cardin, the kind of thing my Dad might wear. When I see his eyes—I have to stop and catch a breath.
“Holden?” the man says my name and it sounds like he’s been dying to say it. There’s a strange yearning in his voice, a slight tremble that makes me uncomfortable.
The man gestures to Ronnie. “Why’ve you tied his hands!” he snaps. “The blindfold would have sufficed!”
Ronnie gets busy ripping the ties and it’s a relief to finally have my arms to myself.
“I’m sorry,” the man says. “About the way they had to bring you here. I assure you, this is just a one-time thing. I don’t intend to keep a lot of secrets from you anymore.”
“Who are you?”
Instead of answering the man is staring at me again. “You’re really Cynthia’s kid?”
So, he knows my mother. Big deal. “Yes.”
“Fuck,” the man says, and he gets all tears and everything. He quickly swipes at his eyes, and shakes hands with me. “Zaff. Zaff Heliot.”
“Holden Danvers,” I say. “But you already knew that.”
“You’ll have to excuse me, Holden. I never thought I’d see you again. Can I get you something? You’re old enough to drink, right?”
“Yes,” I say, still utterly confused. I have no idea what the guy’s even saying anymore. I never thought I’d see you again.
“What’s your poison?”
“You have any bourbon?”
He smiles. “Bourbon, huh?” It’s like he wants to say something but stops himself. He turns to Harlow. “Harlow,” he says. “Go get something from my cabinet.”
Harlow leaves and Ronnie stays there, his hands laying loosely on a brand new Glock, the kind my father gifted to me on the last birthday we celebrated. Zaff leads me to a coffee table and we sit on the sofas next to the table. All this time, Zaff keeps staring at me and now it’s just causing some unnecessary fear to rise inside my chest. Harlow comes back with a Michter’s Single Barrel, at least twenty years old and leaves the drink on the table along with a couple of glasses. “Drink up,” Zaff says, when he’s done pouring.
I raise the glass to my lips and know that this is one of the best shit that this world has to offer and my trust in this Zaff fellow increases just a notch. It’s not nothing to have good taste in whiskey.
“So,” I begin. “As much as I’m enjoying having a drink with a complete stranger. Can we please get to the point? You brought me here for a reason. So why don’t we get to the matter at hand?”
He smiles. “You’re definitely Cynthia’s son.”
“You know my mother.”
“I should hope so,” Zaff says. “We used to be married.”
The drink almost falls from my hand so I place it on the table but my hands are still shaking. “You brought me here so you could play some kind of prank on me?”
Zaff places his drink glass down as well. “It’s not a joke, Holden. You’re my son.”
I don’t know why I keep sitting there; running is what I should be doing. “You’re lying.”
Zaff takes out his wallet.
He takes out an old, folded picture and shows it to me. The picture is of a couple, and the woman looks like a lot like my mother’s old pictures and the man looks a lot like Zaff. Then I notice the boy in the picture—it’s strange but now that I see it, father and son both have the same eyes. My first thought, is that Zaff knows someone with Photoshop on their computer but then I see Zaff’s eyes; no wonder they looked familiar they were my own eyes on the face of that guy.
I get up. “I have to go.”
“Sit down, Holden. We’re not done yet.”
“Yeah. I think we are.”
I start walking, I don’t know where but I figure there’s got to be some way out of this shithole, but Ronnie blocks my path. “Get out of my way, Ronnie.”
“Holden.”
“Tell him to get out of my way.”
“No one’s going to stop you, Holden.” Zaff says, from where he’s sitting. “But you came here looking for something. You saw the photo. We can get a DNA test but I’m pretty sure it’s not needed.”
“Why should I listen to you?” I say, walking up to him. “You abandoned us!”
Zaff scoffs. “Is that what your mother told you?” he looks angry. “That I abandoned you?” He stands and looks right at me. “She took you away from me, Holden! She was the one who abandoned me!”
“You’re lying.”
“Am I?” Zaff says. “Before you accuse me of lying, why don’t you ask your mother the truth, Holden? And while you’re at it, ask her why she ignored all my requests to see you, why she never so much as let me talk to you! All because her husband was some hotshot who could force a father to stay away from his son!!!”
He has tears in his eyes.
I’m so completely dumbstruck I can’t form a single word.
Zaff hugs me out of nowhere.
Even though I basically stand there like a lifeless corpse, that doesn’t stop him. When he finally breaks away he pats my cheek. “I know all this is hard for you to accept right now, so I need you to go home and think about this. When you’re ready to talk, I’ll be right here. Harlow will take you home and he’ll give you my personal number so you can call me any time, Holden.” And just like that, Ronnie comes to blindfold me but Zaff stops him. “No,” Zaff says. “No more secrets. A son should know where his father is at all times.”
The Aftermath
SEBASTIAN
There are times when Teague sounds like the most reasonable guy on the planet. This is not one of those times. “I can’t believe you went through with it!” I yell when we’re in my car and I’m driving him back to his place. Teague is holding up his shirt, checking on the big bruise that has formed around his flank.
“What’re you going to tell Mia? She’s going to notice the bruise.”
“Can’t believe I got away with a bruised rib and a nosebleed.”
“Seriously, Teague?”
&
nbsp; “What!”
“What will you tell her?”
“She knows I train. Harder than usual sometimes.”
“Fuck.”
“What’re you so mad at me for? I thought you understand!”
“Why would think I’d understand something as crazy as this!”
“Sebastian,” Teague says. “I need a friend. Okay? I can’t tell Holden. You know he’s going through his own shit. So is Daniel.”
I don’t know how to make him understand what I’m feeling inside. Fear. Anxiety. More fear. Those people in the cage looked and behaved like animals and I can’t believe that for all that time, Teague was part of that madness. It is madness, that’s what it was no matter what Teague calls it. “You’re insane, Teague.”
“Everybody’s insane. Most people just hide it better than I do.”
“You know what hiding constitutes, right?” I ask. “It means secrets. Lies. Deceiving someone. And by someone I mean Mia.”
Teague goes silent for a while and then he speaks. “I’m going to tell her,” he says. “I wasn’t planning on lying to her. I’m just waiting for the right time to say all this, that’s all.”