***
RYDER STAYED BEHIND as Joel and Missy drove away. He thought about texting Violet that the coast was clear, but after the crappy way Joel treated her, he thought picking her up was more appropriate. Joel was an ass. Violet deserved to be treated like the queen she was...and not the ice queen that Joel called her.
Ryder knocked on Violet’s office door and entered with her permission.
Violet was standing from a chair and when she looked up at him, Ryder knew something was wrong. The smile was swiped away from her lips, leaving a thin line. He thought he caught her chin tremble.
Violet turned her unreadable eyes away from Ryder. “I thought you were Melissa bringing me back my iPad,” she said.
“What happened?” Ryder knew he should tread on this water carefully, but something had her upset and he could swear he saw fear play across her face.
Violet ignored him, walking around her desk and not turning back to him until the massive antique was between them. Didn’t she know that piece of wood wouldn’t keep him away.
“Ryder, this isn’t going to work between us,” she started, but the way her voice trailed away with her eyes told him it wasn’t what she wanted.
Joel had been grouchy when he’d arrived back from her office. Slamming his car door, ignoring Ryder and snapping at Missy when she didn’t get in the car quickly enough.
What had they talked about? Or more like what had Joel said to her? Did Violet mention their date to him?
“Violet, what happened?”
“Nothing happened,” she snarled. “I’m not ready for a relationship.”
It was a date, not an invitation to a wedding.
“What did Joel say to you?” Damn it, he should have clocked him when he’d had the opportunity.
“This isn’t about Joel.” Her temper was flaring which only added fuel to Ryder’s fire.
“Damned it isn’t. Ten minutes ago, you were flashing me seductive glances and now you’re not ready for a date? A date?”
“Or is it an attempt to get into my pants?”
Ryder shook his head and moved to the edge of the desk, as close as he could get without moving to the other side. His hands landed on the edge and he leaned forward.
“Don’t do that. We’ve moved passed that. Don’t bring it up when it’s obvious something else is going on here and it has to do with Joel. If you don’t tell me, I will go ask Joel myself. Only I won’t leave without an answer.”
Violet’s jaws clenched together and she glared at Ryder, long and hard. He thought maybe she was preparing to be honest with him and put their lies to rest. He was wrong.
“The man I thought you were was the man I needed that day in the washroom to make me forget how hard it is to watch Joel wed someone else. The man you’re trying to prove that you are, isn’t who I need right now.” Her words stung, but she wasn’t fooling him. He wasn’t blind to her true feelings for him. Lord knew the two of them were terrible at hiding feelings from each other. It wasn’t just about lust and desire and she knew it. This change of heart had something to do with Joel.
“Don’t give me that bullshit.”
“We’re done here,” she said. “Shut the door on your way out.” Violet sat down and started moving papers around on her desk.
Ryder was far from done. He walked around the desk and swung her chair around, then bent down on one knee, so he met her in height. Her hands pulled away when he reached for her, so he grasped both sides of her head and brought her face to his. Her hands tried to pull him off, but he was stronger.
When he started to speak, she stopped struggling. “Don’t shut me out,” he said. “I am not the bad guy, Violet. I promise. Be honest with me, please. We can go so much further if you are just upfront with me. What did Joel say to you? Why are you pushing me away? Why are you scared?”
Violet struggled emotionally, as her eyes went through several phases and when she finished, he thought she was going to talk to him.
Instead she asked, “Who are Susan and Kelly?”
What the hell did they have to do with anything? How did she even know about them? It wasn’t Joel, because even he didn’t know about his dad or their workers.
“Speechless,” she said.
He hated what she was thinking. Was it Joel planting more lies into her mind. “Where−”
Violet cut him off, finishing his question for him. “Did I hear their names? In the bathroom. Remember when you were trying to decide which one, or both, were going to be waiting for you at home? Susan and Kelly? Or have you forgotten about them already?”
He wasn’t ready to tell her about his dad. If they had gone forward in a positive direction, he would have been more open to the inevitable. But, right now, he didn’t know what she was thinking and giving her that kind of information, when his father hadn’t wanted anyone to know, wasn’t happening.
“Violet, that wasn’t what it sounded like. What you’re making it sound like.”
“I’m not making it sound like anything. It sounded like you were having a threesome.”
Did this woman hear anything he said earlier?
“Exactly. It’s not what it sounded like.”
“Well, what was it, Ryder? Please enlighten me.”
Ryder remained quiet and his eyes fell to her lap. He wanted to tell her. He didn’t want lies between them, but this was different. This was loyalty to his dad and he couldn’t go back on his word, not right now, not like this.
“I can’t,” he finally said. He looked up and saw that even if he told her, it was a losing battle. She was finished with him, just like an ice queen. “Not right now Violet. I’m sorry.”
“That’s not enough for me.”
“It’s not enough or it’s an excuse to walk away from us because you’re scared? Because Joel has hurt you so badly that you can’t even imagine what it feels like to not be scared of trusting a man. Is it so hard to believe that the incredible feelings soaring through you are real and that you deserve them? You deserve them Violet.”
Violet pulled away from him and Ryder let her go. He didn’t want to, but he also didn’t want her to have a reason not to trust him.
Violet rolled back on the chair, but stayed seated, sending an ice cold stare.
“Don’t act like you know me just because we spent one day on your boat together. You don’t know me, Ryder. You don’t know my past. You know nothing.”
Ryder stood, accepting that he was done here. Violet wasn’t ready to let him into her life. Ryder might not know all the things that conspired between her and Joel, but he knew he couldn’t help her figure them out. Violet needed to do this on her own.
“I know you better than Joel ever did.” He didn’t doubt it and wished he’d gotten her first, before Joel had put all the fear and doubt in her.
Ryder had thought his trust in people had diminished, but it was nothing compared to how this woman held tightly to her emotions. Since the day Courtney hurt him, Ryder had used his distrust to push people away, much like the woman in front of him. Only he knew...he felt...that he could trust Violet. He was ready to take the step, but she wasn’t.
“Say hi to Susan and Kelly.”
Her final dismissing jab did not faze Ryder like she hoped. He remained calm, but he spoke forceful. “When you’re finished acting like a lost child, hiding in the dark shadows, feeding your fear the lies that what you feel for me isn’t real, you come find me. Because Violet Caliendo, I don’t care if we’ve spent one day together or one-hundred, I’m not afraid to admit that I like you.”
Ryder’s mother had always told him that the day he found his soul mate, his heart would be clear. His heart couldn’t be any clearer that it was this woman and only this woman.