Three days had passed and still no word about her test results. The worry was always in the back of her mind. Stefan and Nick were determined to pretend there was nothing amiss. Either one or the other was constantly checking on her. It was sweet, but becoming tiresome.
Stacey was at work and Nick had just gotten a clean bill of health from his doctor. Nick was suggesting that they go out to celebrate, when her phone buzzed. “Hello?”
“Stacey. This is Dr. Landis. I received your test results. Can you come to my office?” His tone was very professional.
That made the feeling in the pit of her stomach worse. “Tell me now.” Stacey said numbly. She knew what he was going to say, but didn’t want to delay it.
“I’m sorry Stacey, but your leukemia is back. Come to my office so we can talk.”
Stacey hung up her phone and looked up at Nick. He knew from her expression that the news wasn’t good. She felt like she was suddenly in a vacuum. She couldn’t breathe. How on earth was she going to find the strength to fight this? Nick pulled her into his arms. “The leukemia?”
Stacey nodded her head and his hold on her was tighter. She wanted to cry, but couldn’t let herself give into it. It felt good to have Nick’s support, but she wanted Stefan here. But she could barely speak. Stacey was trying to get a hold of her emotions when Nick released her and pulled out his cellphone. “Stefan, this is Nick. You need to get down to the hospital. Now.”
Stacey could hear Stefan’s muffled response on the other end of the line. Nick stuffed his phone back into his pocket. “Do you want to wait for Stefan to get here before you go down to talk to your doctor?”
Stacey nodded her head. “Don’t leave. When Stefan gets here, don’t leave. I need you too.”
So a short time later, Stacey was in Dr. Landis office with Nick on one side of her and Stefan on the other. The doctor said that he wanted to do a multi-drug chemotherapy regimen. Nick and Stefan asked questions and the doctor answered them, but Stacey couldn’t focus. She was completely zoned out. This was so surreal. She had found the man of her dreams now she was sick and could die. It seemed a cruel twist of fate.
Stacey stood up and began to walk out. They turned to look at her. “Stefan, please drive me home.” They all made moves to get her to stay. But she repeated, “Stefan, please drive me home.”
Nick and Stefan exchange wary glances. They nodded to each other and Stefan rose to see Stacey out. As she was leaving she could hear Nick making an appointment for the end of the week to get her back to the doctor.
Stacey had so much spinning through her head. She couldn’t believe she had everything she ever wanted only for it to be threatened like this. She felt empty inside; didn’t know how to respond, so she just let the waves of despair wash over her. She was feeling sorry for herself, but at the moment she didn’t have the strength to fight it.
But Stacey had to find the strength somewhere, because she couldn’t give up. Nick needed her. Stefan needed her. Mrs. Horowitz needed her. And she hadn’t had a chance to live her life yet.
Stacey hadn’t said one word since they left the office and neither had Stefan. She wondered what he thought. Now she worried if he wanted to be saddled with someone who had such a big battle ahead of them. For better or worse. In sickness and in health. But he hadn’t taken those vows yet. Should she let him off the hook? Would he better off not having to go through this?
He let them into her place and ushered her in like she was made of glass. Stacey sighed seeing the beginning of the end. She was now fragile girl. Everyone always treated you differently when you had cancer. Like the illness could rub off on them. Tears threatened, but what good would they do? In the end, she was still going to have to go through the chemotherapy. Would probably still lose her hair, and could quite possibly lose the fight and her life.
Stacey missed her mom; she had been such a rock for her when she’d gone through this as a child. Now Stacey had to do this on her own; because she was slowly coming to the conclusion that she had to leave Stefan out of this. It would be the most selfish thing in the world to put him through this rollercoaster ride she was about to go through.
“You can go now.” Stacey said sullenly.
“What?” Stefan was perplexed by her statement.
“Stefan, I don’t think we should see each other anymore.” Stacey took off her ring and handed it to him.
He looked at the ring in his hand dumbstruck. Then anger flicked across his face. “Do you honestly think I’m going to walk away from you right now?”
“You don’t have a choice, because I don’t want you here.” Stacey stated flatly.
“Stacey I love you, of course I’m going to be here to see you through this.” Stefan exclaimed.
“See me through this! You have no idea what you’re talking about! I could die! Don’t you get it? I could die!” The tears she had been fighting spilled over.
Stefan tried to pull her into his arms, but she pulled away. “Go now. Please.” The bone deep weariness had returned. She didn’t have the strength to fight him.
“Fine, I’ll leave right now, but this isn’t over. I love you.” He walked out the door and Stacey lay on the sofa and cried.